On Their Territory We're Screwed
by GlitchGirl23
Summary: Sequel to 'Invasion of the Sensei's Dum Dumm Dumm.' In their world it's "do as we say, and you live." Of course, they are being tortured non stop, including training, molesting, etc,etc. You can imagine whatever else is occurring xD
1. Prologue

**On Their Territory We're Screwed**

**- Prologue -**

**(J: HA! You thought I was going to leave you hanging for a month or two didn't you? T: Jenna's not THAT mean. K: But she's mean enough. J: "Sweat drop" The real reason for this prologue is to recap, just fot those of you with bad memory. In the last chapter of 'Invasion of the Sensei's ' Kenzie, Takisha and I were having a sleep over at Kenzie's. Only it got cut short by weird noises drawing us to the attic where we were assaulted and abducted. T: You were the only one that got away pain free Jenna. I got whacked in the head with something, and Kenzie got hit in the back of the neck. K: The most you'll get is a headache. J: I can always stop working on this and go rewrite the last chapter so I get punched in the gut. T,K: NO! J: Then stop bitching and live with it. Now on with the sequel!)**


	2. Oh Crap

**J: Nothing more thrilling than posting the first chapter of a new fanfic, or in this case the first chapter of a sequel fanfic. Right?**

**K,T: Wouldn't know -.-'**

**J: Oh...right...Never mind. But anyways I will disclaim this time, but I wanna get reviews with the reviews suggestions for disclaimers, And if I get more than one I'll make it a group dislcaim thingie. So enjoy! I do not own anything to do with the Akatsuki, and the girls own themselves.**

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Chapter One - Oh Crap!

Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. That's all the girl's minds had going on. Every now and then they heard someone's voice, but they just ignored it and continued sleeping.

After what must have been a week of sleeping they heard one familiar voice say," How much longer are they going to sleep for, un?! It's been two days already, un!" They knew who it was, but their tired minds wouldn't give them the name.

Another familiar voice responded," They've slept long enough. Wake them up." The little voice in the girls' minds whispered,' Open your eyes before they open them for you!' Being ignorant teenagers they of course brushed off the warning.

They really wished they hadn't when the voice of a porn star breathed in their ears," Wake up ladies, you've gotten enough beauty sleep." Jumping higher than any jack rabbit could the three girls clung to each other with eyes wide as sauce pans.

The first shock they received was when they realized they weren't in any kind of house, but a cave. Secondly the pain from how they'd passed out (Jenna and Takisha held their heads in their hands, and Kenzie rubbed the back of her neck.) Lastly they took notice of the whole Akatsuki corporation standing around them. Oh, and one more thing to add on. Deidara was laughing his off at how they'd reacted to HIDAN'S sexy voice. **(J: I believe that no matter who you are, everyone has a sexy voice. Some just happen to sound like porn stars...Much to their annoyance/ pleasure. K: It's still creepy. T: And it was right in MY ear! "cries from nightmare yet to come.")**

Being the most out going in the group of three Kenzie asked," Uh...Where are we? I mean, yes, a cave, but where is the cave located? AND WHY ARE WE HERE?!" Kenzie lost her reserve thanks to her neck throbbing in agony.

Of course everyone turned to Leader to answer the questions, keeping his gaz fixed on his successfully captured targets Leader replied," You are now in our dimension, and let me assure you, you will not be returning home anytime soon. As to why you are here...That knowledge is confidential. I will be returning to my room. One you needs to show our...guests, their living quarters." He then dramatically disappeared in a puff of smoke, Konan sweat dropped and thought, ' He basically just ran away from the question. I'm going to have to talk to him.' Konan copied Leader and poofed off after him.

Konan had just left Takisha, Jenna and Kenzie alone with ALL the Akatsuki guys. Thankfully Tobi was among them, bouncing up and down crazily he cheered," YAY! Kenzie-chan, Takisha-chan, and Jenna-chan are living with Tobi now! YAY! Tobi's a good boy! Tobi will show you where you sleep! This way!!" Skipping away down a hallway he was unaware that the girls were running after him with tears of gratitude in their eyes.

Tobi came to a stop in front of a door that stood wide open, revealing it to be filled with many assortments of Akatsuki trash. There were kunais, bloody cloaks, ripped pairs of boxers **(J: "Snickers") **and many, many, many cartons of uneaten take out food. Seeing the beautiful sea of trash Takisha pointed at it and asked," We don't have to clean that up, do we?"

"No! Everyone was suppose to clean it up before we left, but everyone says they forgot. So Leader said they had to clean it up when they had the time." Tobi replied happily, earning sweat drops from Takisha and Jenna (Kenzie didn't since she's the exact same way.) The girls were suppose to believe that the Akatsuki (who were all men except Konan) would use their spare time to clean out the bedroom they'd taken years to fill with trash. Like that was ever going to happen.

Sighing Takisha pushed up her short sleeves and told Tobi," Tell all the Akatsuki men that they're lazy good for nothing pigs. But don't say that to Leader, I don't want to die. Can you do that for me Tobi?"

Nodding eagerly he saluted and said," Tobi's a good boy. Tobi will tell everyone they're lazy good for nothing pigs, but Tobi won't tell Konan-chan and Pein-sama. Tobi's off to be a good boy!" Tobi then disappeared to insult all the guys, (they're still huddled in the living room discussing cruelties to deliver upon the girls.)

Hands on her hips Takisha turned to Jenna and Kenzie to ask," Who's doing what? 'Cause I'll clean the corners and under the bed...If there is a bed."

"You want US, two of the laziest girls in the world, to help you clean THAT?" Jenna asked disbelieving, if there was one thing all teenagers couldn't stand, it was chores. Especially on a scale of that magnitude.

"Including THE laziest girl?" Kenzie raised her eyebrows and pointed at herself.

"Yep." Takisha said in a threatning tone. Kenzie thought for a way out.

"I'll pay you."

"In _what?"_

"...Love?" Kenzie offered sheepishly, opening her arms for a hug.

Turning her head to the side coldly Takisha rejected," Sorry, I only accept cash. And as far as I know, Kakuzu has titanium locks on ALL the money vaults. So get to work. You too Jenna!" As Takisha and Kenzie had been discussing chore-pay off, Jenna had tried to be sneaky and tip toe away out of sight.

Having been caught before getting around the corner Jenna slumped bacl mumbling," I'll clean off the bed and around it. If a bed doesn't exist then I'll clean in random areas."

Kenzie was pracitcally drowning in gloom lines, her head nearly touching the floor from slouching forward she grumbled," I'll clean the cleanest area I can see."

"And if there's no 'cleanest area' you're just going to lean against the wall and watch, am I right?" Jenna asked, already sure that the answer would be yes. Kenzie just smiled and nodded.

Takisha smacked Kenzie upside the head, making Kenzie slightly cry when Takisha scolded," If we're going to sleep in this room you can help clean it. If you don't clean, you can sleep somewhere else. Now get your ass moving!" Not bothering to listen to any complaints Takisha shoved Jenna and Kenzie into the bedroom, she then slammed the door behind her.

A hand over her mouth Kenzie demaned," WHY DID YOU CLOSE THE DOOR?! THERE'S NO WINDOWS IN HERE!!" It was true, since the Akatsuki base was in a cave they couldn't afford the luxury of windows in the bedrooms, or else it might give away the location. **(J: Deidara of course, didn't listen and blew a tiny window into the wall of his bedroom. His room smells the best, next to Konan's, she uses perfume to keep it smelling decent. Can you blame Tobi for constantly running into Deidara's room unannounced? K: I wouldn't be surprised if the guys snuck into his room when Deidara is off on missions. T: I can just see it, Deidara comes back from a month long mission, his room is completely trashed. And everyone is in the living room containing their composure so Deidara doesn't kill them. "Snickers at mental image." J; I'm sure that has happened more than once to the blonde that doesn't know how to secure his bedroom door.)**

A finger pressed to her lips Takisha whispered darkly," Tobi delivered my message, the guys were right around the corner, on BOTH sides. I think they wanted to slaughter me, ahha. Hold your breathe for as long as you can, and get cleaning." This order given Jenna and Kenzie cried a little inside (and out for Kenzie) either way they got to work.

**- Outside the Closed Door -**

Hidan, Kisame, Itachi, Deidara, Kakuzu, Sasori, and Zetsu stood in the hall, their gaze intent upon the closed door. It'd been 10 minutes since the door slammed shut in their faces. They'd only expected the girls to live for two minutes, if not less. Every once in a whule there'd be a yelp or squeak from behind the door. "Argh! I found an ARM! It's still dripping with blood too!" and, "Um, ew. There's a pile of uber sized boxers in this corner." Their favorite was, "You have got to be kidding me! I just found ANOTHER bloody muddy cloak! You'd think they'd have run out by now or something!"

At almost 11 minutes Deidara grumbled," How much longer are they going to stay in there, un?" Like Hidan and Kakuzu Deidara was losing his patience, (Hidan and Kakuzu were raiding the kitchen to pass the time.) any longer and he'd blow the door open.

Itachi was leaning against the wall beside the door, his eyes closed he muttered confidentally," They'll be coming out shortly, it's getting late and I'm sure they'll be getting hungry. They haven't eaten for nearly three days after all." The others nodded in agreement, they themselves were starting to feel their stomachs get agitated from lack of food.

**- Inside the Bedroom -**

"Hey. You guys notice that we have half this room cleaned already?" Takisha asked proudly, she was surprised at how much work Kenzie and Jenna were doing. It did help that she turned it into a game, whoever found the most articles of clothing and empty take out containers got a larger portion of supper. (The guys didn't hear this since it was said in hushed voices.) So far Kenzie was winning.

Jenna sighed in relief and asked," Is this enough to stop and go get something to eat?" Kenzie's mouth flooded with drool just thinking about the word food.

Takisha glanced back at the door replying," Can't say for sure. I mean, the Akatsuki could still be outside the door."

"Easiest way to find out. Jenna, poke your head out to check." Kenzie demanded, pointing to the door.

In disbelief Jenna asked whinely," Why do I have to poke my head out? Your idea, you stick your head out." **(J: If you haven't noticed, Kenzie makes Jenna do everything she doesn't want to do. K: Hey, in this situation, it's life or death. Jenna's older, so she has to sacrifice herself for the future generation. T: Why didn't you ask me to do it? I'm older than both you AND Jenna. K: 'Cause you can make decent meals, not just Macaroni and Cheese, and Grilled cheese sandwiches. T: Oh, ahha, sucks to be you Jenna. J: "Grump.")**

Putting on her most angry-demanding face Kenzie pointed and demanded again," Poke your head out, now!" Aware of the immense height difference Kenzie would gladly use over her Jenna sighed, she wasn't going to get out of this predicament.

Tip toeing around all the severed fingers, dirty clothes, and dishes, the odd puppet head or two, she just walked on the candy wrappers (Tobi licked them to make sure they weren't sticky.) Getting to the door Jenna cast a pleading look back over her shoulder, Kenzie and Takisha motioned with their hands for her to get on with it. Depressed, Jenna reached forward, opened the door wide enough to stick her head out and...Got pulled out in the hallway. **(J: This is what happened. I stuck my head out in the hall, found that the Akatsuki guys were still out there and before I could pull my head back in they grabbed me and pulled me the rest of the way out. K: That's exactly why I made you do the check. J: I am aware of that thanks.)**

A second passed by before realization kicked into Kenzie's brain, glomping onto Takisha she whimpered," It's happening all over again!"

"What's happening all over again?" Takisha was just as shocked, but she didn't think anything drastic would happen to Jenna. Plus it's only fair that Jenna should suffer first since it was her boyfriend that made them leave the dance early, thus resulting in their capture. (Although they would have been captured sooner or late anyways.)

"The kidnapping! Only they took Jenna first instead of you!" Kenzie's mind must have been adapting to their current situation very, very slowly. So she was expressing herself more extremely than she usually would, meaning everything was said loudly and enthused with some kind of emotion or other.

Sweat dropping Takisha pushed Kenzie off saying," Kenzie, there's no need for thek to kidnap us...again. They're probably just torturing her in hopes we'll go out to help her. And yes, we will try. But you're going out first this time."

Kenzie's eye twitched out of nerves, she'd been hoping Takisha would be on the same wave length and decide to leave Jenna be. Of course Takisha stayed on a whole different channel, so she remained the loyal friend. Meaning possible pain and suffering for Kenzie. Puppy dog eyes on full exposure she whimpered," B-but, you're the older one out of the two of us! Why can't you go first?"

"Because you're the one that got Jenna into this mess. Now go poke your head out to see what they're doing. I can only assume that all the rules against molestation and rape have been removed for whatever reasons. So if Itachi is not there, and neither is Jenna, then it's all your fault." Takisha seemed certain that guilt tripping was key to Kenzie manipulation.

Apparently it wasn't," That's not good enough! But I'll stick my head out, just to see if Jenna actually is getting raped. If she is, then I will cry for my own safety. If she's just getting molested, I will still cry for my own safety." Kenzie bravely(not really) marched off to the door, sucking in her last breathe of courage she copied Jenna and stuck her head out into the hall.

The only thing she saw were colours, blue, black,red and white actually. Reason being : Kisame was standing in front of her. Lifting her gaze so she made eye contact with him she decided to ask," Uh, where is Jenna?"

"I'm over here, god are you blind?! Now come help me!" Jenna yelled, thrashing about in the restraints of threads Kakuzu had her held in...Upside down, of course. Jenna wasn't usually so mean and demanding, but she really, REALLY didn't like the feel of the threads, it reminded her of spider webs too much.

Being distracted by Jenna, Kenzie too no notice of Kisame slowly moving to her side. The sneaky blue devil was trying to manuever around Kenzie to get in the room, he didn't want to put Kenzie in Kakuzu's hold. He just wanted to get a hold of Takisha to drag her out. They didn't want to hurt her for the comment she'd told Tobi to deliver to the, they just wanted to put her through her initiation first.

His scheme to sneak around Kenzie would have worked if Kenzie hadn't spotted him from the corner of her eye. Thinking that Kisame wanted to knab her as Jenna had been, she pulled her head back in and slammed the door in Kisame's face. Hand over her heart Kenzie let out the breathe she'd inhaled and held at the last second," That was way too close."

"Did you see what happened to Jenna?" Takisha asked almost nervously, she really wanted to find out.

Kenzie waved lazily and replied," She's fine, angry that Kakuzu has her wrapped up in his thread tentacle thingies, but fine. Now I'm more concerned for our well being. They're going to get impatient soon, and just bust the door open. If that happens then we're going to be in shit, in more ways than one."

Takisha raised an eyebrow to display her silent confusion, Kenzie signed in irritation that Takisha didn't get what she meant. She'd rather work on an escape plan than explain herself, but still she did," Think about it, these guys would rather make more messes than clean up. So if they bust our door into a million pieces, do you really think they'll fix it or get us a new one?" That clued Takisha into the massive problem they'd have in the future. No door, no privacy. No privacy meant a free show for the guys.

Coming back to the present Takisha put some of ehr hair in her mouth, a bad habit she'd developed when she was young and nervous. Turning a full circle she scanned the room for anything that could get them out of this new predicament, seeing non she looked back at Kenzie to whimper," What're we going to do?! We're trapped!"

"I'm thinking! I'm thinking! I'm getting nothing! Dammit! Why do we get stuck in these situations?!" Kenzie had resorted to her own bad habit of chewing on her non-exsistent finger nails. She's chewed on them enough from all the other stressful situations they'd been thrown in before getting kidnapped and transported to the other dimension.

"That question's easier to answer than the one we need the answer to...Oh! I've got it! On the count of three you open the door, run out and get their attention, while they're chasing after you I'll sneak out and go hide somwhere else." Takisha exclaimed chipperly, unphased by the more than obvious glare Kenzie was giving her.

Crossing her arms in a show of physical annoyance Kenzie asked irritably," And what makes you think I'll be the scape goat so you can get away? How about you do the running and screaming and I go and hide. That sounds alot better in my opinion."

Takisha expected this much from Kenzie, and easily thwarted her idea of switching positions," Food." Kenzie's seething glare of frustration showed that she was defeated and Takisha knew it.

Stomping back to the door she grabbed the knob, gave Takisha one more hateful glare over her shoulder, then threw open the door and ran for all she was worth. Sure it distracted the guys for the duration of two seconds, but they didn't bother giving chase. Instead Kakuzu let go of Jenna, (who happily ran after Kenzie) and seized Takisha in his threads. Struggling against the threads (and ignoring the creepy feeling) Takisha whined," Aw, c'mon! I didn't mean it when I called you all good for nothing pigs."

Hidan put himself face to face with Takisha, flicking her nose he explained," We're not fucking upset about what you said. We just decided you deserve your initiation first." At that all the guys put on a chilling smile, what they had planned for her was NOT going to be fun.


	3. Initiations

**J: Alrighty, this chapter, which is crazy long to all your happiness took longer than should have to be typed and I apologize for that. Anyhoodles...uh...I dont know ahha.**

**T: You losing your opening ideas?**

**K: If you don't know what to do then you should let one of us open for you, or even one of teh Akatsuki members.**

**J: Hey that's not such a bad idea!**

**K: I was actually kidding.**

**T: I like that idea too. The next chapter needs to be opened by the Akatuski, and the one of us can disclaim 8D**

**J: YOSH! Thanks Kenzie! "Hugs"**

**K: No! I was kidding! Why won't you listen to me?! "pulling hair out in frustration"**

**J: Alright, so in your review I want to know who you want to open for the next chapter instead of disclaiming. But for now we have, on request, Deidara "unethused" back to disclaim...Damn Dei fans -.-'**

**Dei: Aww, you know you love me, un "Perky smile"**

**J,T,K: "Rolls eyes"**

**Dei: Okay, Jenna does not own any of the Naruto characters named, and the girls own themselves. Although I wouldn't mind "owning" them "Winks and runs from rabid Takisha, Jenna, and Kenzie"**

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Chapter Two - Initiations

**- Under someone's Bed -**

Jenna and Kenzie layed on their stomachs, having caught their breathe a minute ago they could speak and think clearly," What do you think happened to Takisha?"

"Knowing as much as I do about them, which is absolutely nothing. I'm gonna take a guess and say that they're either making her regret the message she delivered via Tobi, OR they're humiliating her for their own amusement." Kenzie replied simply, she was actually glad it was Takisha and not her getting the welcome treatment first. If she got lucky (which she knew she wouldn't) they'd be satisfied with torturing Takisha and leave her be.

Jenna opened her mouth to make a statement, only a high pitched squeal came out instead. Eyes wide Jenna squeaked," My gos, what are they doing to her?!" Kenzie merely shrugged. She'd rather not find out if it meant they'd receive the same thing.

Two more ear splitting squeals were heard before Jenna made up her mind," I'm going to go see what's happening. I'm starting to get worried. You coming with me?" Kenzie of course shook her head in a negative. Being a good friend was one thing, being an evil organization's play thing (Not the dirty kind you sick minded people :P) was a whole other massive-not-wanted thing.

Rolling her eyes Jenna left Kenzie to be by herself, the only problem Jenna had with this situation was that she had no idea where to go to find Takisha. 'I guess the best place to start would be where we left her, then try and find her from there.' Thinking this Jenna scurried off through the maze of passageways. **(J: I am actually going to post the layout of the Akatsuki lair on deviant art, when I'll get around to it, I have no idea. But if you ask nicely I'll get it done faster. K: You're going to use my scanner aren't you? J: Only if I fail at drawing it on paint. K: Who said I'll let you use my scanner? J: The little shred of kindness in your heart. K: Suuure.)**

Kenzie fidgeted with her fingers, once Jenna was out of sight the room seemed to start getting smaller. The bed above her felt lower, pressing down on her. Biting down on her lower lip Kenzie mumbled to herself," You're just hallucinating Kenzie. Nothing has changed, the walls aren't closing in and the bed is not pressing down on me...Oh I get it, my conscious is angry becaise I didn't go with Jenna, now it's making me crazy! Well too bad! I'm not leaving, you hear me?!" Kenzie was clearly losing her mind, she was aware of it, she just refused to let it win.

She lost the giht with herself two minutes later and found herself right back at the beginning. In the Akatsuki living room. (She'd gotten lost trying to find the room her, Jenna, and Takisha were going to be sleeping in.) Kenzie also found herself staring at Kisame, Deidara, Kakuzu, and Hidan (Zetsu is there but he's not participating) standing around Takisha as she tried to balance massive plates on her hands and head. By the number of busted plate fragments around Takisha's feet Kenzie could tell Takisha was failing miserably. Still recovering from her bit of insanity Kenzie stupidly asked," What are you doing Takisha?"

"Can't...Talk...Will...Drop...More...Plates!" Takisha growled through her teeth. Even moving her mouth would off set her head, and cause more plates to fall to their destruction. At the sound of multiple crashes the guys present snickered, which only deepened Takisha's already furrowed eyebrows.

Seeing that she wasn't going to get answers out of Takisha, Kenzie turned to Zetsu (he was standing the closest) and asked," So, why is Takisha balancing plates on her hands and head?"

"It's her initiation. Each plate she breaks adds another day onto the total of day she has to do dishes for the month. So far she's gotten to 10, which is alot better than we gambled on." Zetsu explained, completely content to watch Takisha suffer. As he'd been explaining he didn't notice that Kenzie became very rigid. **(T: Why'd she go rigid? She's not the one breaking plates and getting more dish work. J: Zetsu unconsciously told her that we're getting initiations. T: Oh, good. Then I won't be the only one suffering. J: Yes, but she doesn't know if she'll be next or last. Making it all the more frustrating for her.)**

Shifting uncomfortably on her feet Kenzie said a little confused," Her initiation is rather unorthodox...How long does she have to do it for?" That got the smile off Zetsu's face.

"We actually never decided on that...I guess it's been long enough." Zetsu said to himself, going over to Takisha he did the honours of removing her cursed burden off her head.

Crumpling to her knees Takisha sighed in relief," Thank Saint Jimmy that's over. Why did you take so long to stop?!" Takisha was yelling out of slight pain instead of anger, for she'd crumpled down on top of the shattered plate pieces and now had two shards in each knee.

Deidara made a face, pointing to the scattered plate pieces he ordered," Clean up your mess un, we don't need someone getting glass in their foot." Deidara was actually just avoiding the question in a very obvious manner. Takisha glared daggers at the stupid blonde, but she did still pick up the place pieces. She may not care for most of the Akatsuki members, but she did care about the amount of trouble she'd get in if one of them got hurt and complained.

Biting back her tears of pain she slightly whimpered," Stupid initiation. Mine better not be the worst out of the three of us."

At the mention of there being three of them Kenzie finally remembered something," Hey, have any of you seen Jenna? She left before I did to find you."

Kenzie's blood got a few degress colder when Deidara, Kisame, Zetsu, Hidan and Kakuzu all snickered. Hidan put on a sinister smile to reply," Itachi went to find her to deal her her initiation. And since she never made it here, I'm gonna take a stab and say he found her. Poor little wench didn't stand a chance."

Takisha exchanged a worried glance with Kenzie, Jenna was obviously going to be put through hell, what kind of hell, they could only hope wasn't too brutal.

**- Five Minutes Ago -**

"Uh...I thought I heard the screams coming from this direction. My hearing must have been effected going through the portal to this dimension...Great, a dead end." Jenna had gone in the exact opposite direction Kenzie went in. She also didn't bother to stop and properly listen, thus putting her in front of someone's bedroom door. From the fact that it was made solidly out of metal, meant that it was the Leader's bedroom. Which was someone she really didn't want to talk to.

Turning on her heel Jenna went back down the hall she'd come from, or so she thought. There's two main hallways in the Akatsuki lair, Jenna had come from the one that led to her room and a few others. The one she was walking down after reaching Leader's room was the other hallway. The hallway that Itachi's room was in.

Jenna had been fine on her way to Leader's room due to the small noises she'd hear, giving her some comfort. Going down the hall on her way back was different. Nothing could be heard except her foot steps, there was no signs indicating the presence or where abouts of everyone else. The hairs on the back of her neck started to rise, Jenna could feel her paranoia start to kick in. Shadows flickered from the corner of her eyes, the walls were altering in shape and structure. The hallway appeared to be stretching out before her, never going to end, never going to let her rest. Then suddenly, "Boo."

"AHHH!" Jumping fifty feet in the air Jenna nearly knocked herself unconscious slamming her back against the wall. Looking highly unamused/ curious Itachi stared at Jenna placidly. She'd been letting her mind go crazy, she didn't hear him walk up behind her.

A hand over her barely beating heart Jenna yelled in a squeaky voice," Don't sneak up on me like that! I nearly died of a heart attack!"

"Too bad you didn't. It would have saved me some trouble." Itachi said in his usual bored monotone voice. Jenna glared back at him, sometimes she really wished he was the one that scared easily. Of course that would never happen.

Managing to calm herself from shaking Jenna got off the wall, and simply walked away. Itachi wasn't worth anymore of her words. That's what she decided anyway. The elder Uchiha wasn't going to let his victim get away so easily however. Catching up to her in three steps he grabbed the back of her pajama shirt **(J: We're still in our pajamas remember.) **and hauled her backwards to the second door she'd passed. Struggling against his hold Jenna complained," Hey! Let me go! Wh-where are we going?!"

Itachi dragged her in, threw her on the bed and closed the door. Jenna watched in absolute horror as Itachi latched all 10 locks on his door. When he turned back around and saw the look on Jenna's face (something like this D8) he rolled his eyes saying," You must be perverted like Deidara to go straight to that conclusion."

"CAN YOU BLAME ME?!" Jenna yelled, crab walking away from Itachi. Sadly the bed was right up against the wall, so she didn't go too far.

Leaning back against his door Itachi just stared. In translation that clearly said, 'Yes, he could blame her.' Sweat dropping Jenna pulled the blankets up over top of her head, Itachi's initial impression of this was that Jenna never matured if she acted like this. From under the blue comforter Itachi heard a muffled," Then why the hell did you drag me in here?!"

"For your initiation. Takisha's going through her's right now." Itachi replied, yanking the blanket off to reveal an even more frazzled Jenna staring at him with owl eyes.

Huddling up into a little ball, her knees pulled to her chin she squeaked," Wh-what's my initiation?"

"They left me to decide that, why? I do not know, but I've decided you can clean my room." Itachi said, watching with hidden amusement as Jenna relaxed. He waited until she was totally relaxed and moving off the bed to add on," While wearing this." From the depths of his cloak Itachi pulled out a skimpy maid's outfit, exactly in her size.

Jaw slamming down on the floor Jenna shrieked," FUCK NO!!" Horrofied Jenna made a run for the door, Itachi stook aside to let Jenna get at least one lock open.

When she reached for the second lock Itachi grabbed her and threw her back onto the bed. Pinning her down Itachi got dangerously close to her face and whispered," If you don't put this on of your own free will, I'll gladly dress you myself." If there was one thing Itachi loved to remember, it was the looks on Jenna's face. Particularly at that moment. Her face was one of gorgeous horror, wide eyes and gaping mouth. It was her facial expressions that drove him to torment her so.

Reclaiming her tiny dignity Jenna wiggled a hand free and snatched the maid's outfit from Itachi, glaring at him heatedly Jenna grumbled," I'll put it on myself. But only if you leave the room while I change." There was an undertone of demand to what Jenna said.

Itachi ignored her demand of course, standing up he turned his back to her and told her hottily," This will be good enough."

"Oh, come on! It's not like I can escape, there's no windows for vents for me to crawl out of! Just leave!" Jenna protested, there was no way she was going to change her clothes with Itachi in the room. **(T: Liar! You know you'd love Itachi to watch you undress, you'd like him to help you too! J: D/8 NO! That's just wrong! I'm dating Gaara, remember? K: I don't see anyone named Gaara present at the moment, do you? T: Nope, not an eyebrowless red head in sight...Unless you count Sasori. K: So, you're free to frollock with Itachi. J: o.e, no thanks. I'll be the good long distance girlfriend. T: You know you want Itachi. J: Just drop it alreadly!)**

Itachi didn't respond, he just remained standing with his back to her. Stomping her foot Jenna gave up on winning this obviously silent debate and went back to the bed. Grabbing the blanket she put it on over top of her body, then proceeded to change clothes. Blinded by the blanket Jenna was unaware that Itachi had peeked back at Jenna right when her pants fell to the floor. A second after the blanket fell off, revealing Jenna in her tight skanky maid's outfit. Blushing and glaring at the same time Jenna growled," You have a sick twisted mind, you know that?"

"That's Deidara's mind you're talking about. Now get to work." Itachi said, or ordered actually, that last response while pulling open his door after undoing all the locks.

When the door was wide open, so was Jenna's mouth. For behind Itachi's door stood the rest of the Akatsuki, including Takisha and Kenzie who were currently rolling around on the floor laughing their asses off. In a state of perpetual shock Jenna could no more blush than she could scream. She would have remained in that state had Deidara not come up to her and whispered in her ear,"Mmm, any chance you'll wear that for me tonight,un?"

Fuelled with anger Jenna broke free of her shock and punched the blonde pervert in the face yelling," Hell no you perverted ass!!" Jenna was then able to blush properly.

Doubled over with tears in her eyes Kenzie asked," What the hell Jenna?! What are you doing with Itachi?! Bwuahaha!" Kenzie then proceeded to laugh her ass off some more.

Konan stepped around the ogling men (and bloodied Deidara) saying," I know we allowed you to decide on her initiation Itachi, but is the maid's outfit really necessary?" Konan was more disturbed then anything, she never expected Itachi to have a mind twisted enough to come up with something such as that.

Itachi gave Konan a blank stare saying," You did put me in charge of her initiation, and this is what I've decided upon. Besides, I don't hear any of the others complaining. Do you?" In response the rest of the guys (except Sasori) hooted and wolf whistled. Poor Jenna was on the brink of tears in embarrassment.

Takisha noticed this and decided that the guys had seen enough for that day. Stepping around and in front of them to block their view Takisha put her hands on her hips and ordered," That's enough, buzz off now! Or else I'm not making anything for you to eat ALL day! It'll be a week for you Deidara!" The thought of losing food was a good enough threat to send the guys sulking off. Minus Itachi since he had to keep an eye on Jenna.

Konan nodded in approval of Takisha's actions (while at the same time taking a secret picture of Jenna) and headed off. Jenna took the golden opportunity to glomp Takisha in gratitude, Kenzie made a face at them saying," Way to ruin the only fun we'll have."

Smiling evilly Jenna reminded Kenzie," It's the only fun, YOU will have. Don't forget you still have your initiation to look forward to. Hehehehe." The look of doom upon Kenzie face was precious memory gold to Takisha and Jenna.

Sadly Jenna could not enjoy it longer, for Itachi seized her by the ruffly collar (it's part of the outfit -.-') and dragged her back into his bedroom. Kenzie and Takisha watched as Itachi threw their friend to the floor, shut his door and locked it back up. Ten locks in all. An awkward moment passed by until Takisha asked," So what should I make for lunch?"

"RAMEN!" Kenzie cheered, making Takisha sweat drop and shuffle off to the nearest room to find someone to lead her to the kitchen. As well as ask for a cook book to instruct her on how to make ramen. Kenzie swiftly followed, her spirits too high for ramen to remember that Jenna was currently Itachi's skanky dressed maid.

**- That evening in the living room -**

"Jenna, why are you still wearing that ?" Takisha asked, pointing to the maid's outfit Jenna still wore.

Cocooned in a blanket (from Itachi's room) in such a way that only left her face visible she groaned back," While I was cleaning under Itachi's bed the bastard set my pajamas on fire and let them burn into ashes. When I demanded why he did that he said he was relieving me of any ties I had left to our old dimension. But I KNOW he did it just to satisfy his perverted needs." Takisha couldn't help but break out into another wave of hysteric laughter. Earning a hard smack to the back of her head. **(K: HAHAHA! You poor unlucky child! "Glomp" J: She says ****AFTER**** she laughs at me "Grump" T: I predict Kenzie's torment is coming up. K: D8 J: "Evil gleam in eyes" Mwahaha. K: B-but, I hugged you!! T: You laughed first. K: You laughed before I did! T: Ya, but only 'cause I knew it was safe to. J: Actually you're still doomed Takisha. You're far past due for torment. T: 0.o WAAH! J: "Pleased smirk.")**

"Ooo, did you keep that on just for me, un? You really shouldn't have, but I'm very glad you did,un." Deidara walked into the living room just in time to see Jenna let the blanket fall off and reveal the maid's outfit. Unable to resist the pervertedjust had to tickle Jenna under the chin seductively.

'BAM!' Went Jenna's fist into Deidara's face for the second time that day, her poor knuckles wouldn't be able to take much more blonde-beating. Takisha didn't think Deidara could take many more blows to the face either. A second of weird silence passed once Deidara left to go wash the blood off his face, faces furrowed in confusion both Takisha and Jenna felt that something was missing. It clicked in at the same time," Where's Kenzie?!"

**- With Kenzie -**

"It's really pretty out here!" Kenzie babbled to herself gazing up at the darkening starry night. To her luch ther was a full moon rising just then, she was even luckier since it was casting the tiniest of moonbows**(K: Sometimes you can see a rainbor at night thanks to the moon's light.)**

Kenzie was so relaxed and focused on the sky, she took no notice of the looming shadow approaching her from behind, what was worse was that the looming shadow had a massive smile of malice on his face. Chuckling quietly under his breathe Hidan sprung forward and grabbed Kenzie in a bear hug, holding her tight he laughed," Time for your initiation kid. And it's going to be fun! For me anyways! Hahahaha!"

"Ah, Hidan! What are you doing?! Let me go! AH! Jenna! Takisha! HELLP!!" It was pointless to try calling for help, Kenzie knew that, but she still gave it a shot. Since it obviously didn't work she went with thrashing about wildly.

Hidan scrunched his mouth in annoyance, why victims thought yelling would help them he didn't know, but it really got on his nerves. Holding her tighter and putting a hand over her mouth Hidan grumbled," Be a good fucking girl and cooperate, or we can go through the same system I used after I caught you in the school." Kenzie paused a moment, let her memory bring up the last few Hidan hunts which ended with her being dragged along the floor, then started thrashing again.

Sighing in irritation he took the hand off her mouth and pulled his scythe out from behind his back. Pulling the chain out he wrapped Kenzie up painfully tight and let her drop to the hard rocky ground. "Ow! That fucking hurt! Owww! Stop dragging me! I'll be good and walk. I'll be good and walk!!" Hidan had started dragging Kenzie on the sharp rocked ground the second she opened her mouth. Of course he ignored Kenzie and let her screams for freedom drift off into the night. **(K: What?! That's so cruel! Why did Takisha get off easy?! J: Hmmm, you're right. T: How did I get off easy?! My initiation is stuck with me for the rest of my life! J: That's still not equivalent to my humiliation, and Kenzie's pain. Don't worry, I'll make syre we're all even. T: Why do I feel like my life are in the hands of a shinigami? K: Ryuk?! Where?! "Starts looking around frantically" J,T: -.-")**

Kenzie was shedding tears of pain when Hidan finally stopped dragging her, but her back was far past the point of healing unscarred. So many rocks and sticks had scratched and rubbed her skin it would take a miracle for it to stop hurting before she went to bed...If she went to bed.

"Geez, it took you long enough to get here. She give you a hard time or something Hidan?" Kakuzu asked with clear distaste in his voice. Looking around Kenzie saw that they were in a clearing in the woods, and Kakuzu stood by the edge of a beautiful sparkling lake. She would have admired it more if her blood didn't go cold with the slightest inkling towards what her initiation was.

Hidan "huffed" and pulled the chain off Kenzie, crossing his arms he growled," Shut the fuck up Kakuzu, I had to wait until she was by herself dammit. Otherwise the other two would have followed after and driven me fucking nuts! HEY! WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?!" While Hidan had been ranting to Kakuzu Kenzie decided to take advantage and make a run for it.

When Hidan caught sight of her running he picked up a rock (a really small one) and whipped it at Kenzie's leg, causing it to buckle and make her fall on her face. Laying still out of fear of getting hurt more Kenzie whined," Why am I the one that gets bruises during the initiation?"

"Because you can tolerate it, and don't say you can't. What do you think those hunts were for you bitch?" Hidan asked sourly, hoisting Kenzie up by the ankle and glaring at her.

Glaring back Kenzie replied," I honestly thought it was to amuse yourself." The way Kenzie said it made her own annoyance clear, which only pissed Hidan off more.

Throwing her towards Kakuzu, who actually caught her...Upside down, making one last tear of despair come from Kenzie's eye. Lifting her up so she was face to face with **(J: He is seven feet tall, right? K:"Cries a little" Yees! T Hahaha.) **Since all she could see was his eyes Kenzie could only tell Kakuzu was smirking. The corner of his eyes were crinkled in dark amusement when he cackled," Those hunts were for his amusement, and assesment. It was rough evaluation, so we'll be doing more, how you say thorough. And you're not going to enjoy it one bit. Hehehe." Kakuzu's laugh doubled in mirth when Kenzie's face contortred into one of damnation. (Or in other words, it just looked like this D8) Kenzie could hear Hidan snickering behind them as well, making her face stretch out even more.

Her fears of what her initiation is was confirmed by Kakuzu turning towards the lake. Squirming around Kenzie whimpered (yes, she is getting desperate) "Can't I have a different initiation? Pleease?...I just saw something in the lake! What's in the lake?!"

"Oh, I forgot about that. Kisame has a little "friend" in the lake. Zetsu's pretty good friends with it since he feeds it left overs from his meals." Hidan said rather happily, he was really enjoying this initiation, even though it hasn't officially started yet.

It took approximately two nanoseconds for Kenzie to figure out what's in the lake. Thrashing around like crazy Kenzie wailed," A SHARK?! KISAME PUT A FUCKING SHARK IN THE LAKE?! WHAT THE HELL?! WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?! AHHHHH!!" Kenzie broke out into a series of yelling and sobs. Kakuzu looked over at Hidan with a bored/annoyed expression. Hidan made the same expression back and motioned for him to just finish the job. Gladly agreeing Kakuzu used his thread tentacle to whip Kenzie off across the lake, causing her to drop into the very middle of the lake with a loud 'SPLASH!' Their job done they walked off back to the cave.

Kenzie surfaced just in time to see the retreating figures of Kakuzu and Hidan, waving her arms above her head yelling," HEY! Don't leave me here by myself you assholes! HEEY!" Kakuzu and Hidan wouldn't have gone back even if they heard Kenzie's screams.

Shivering from the freezing water Kenzie looked around her, there was no sign of movement in any direction. So the shark was totally submerged under water, that knowledge registered Kenzie started swimming for shore. As she swam all she could keep thinking baout was the movie 'Jaws.' She just had to watch that movie the day before she got kidnapped and thrown into a lake with a shark. Continuously thinking about a movie where a shark eats people has one advantage, it makes you swim faster. Kenzie probably swam faster than she ever swam before, and swimming faster kept her warm. Or she'd gotten too numb to feel the cold anymore.

Kenzie could see the shore coming, so close yet still too far to make her feel better. The shark still hadn't shown itself, and for some reason it really bothered her. Beneath her something sleek brushed against her foot. Freezing for a moment Kenzie looked down into the water, since it was dark she couldn't really see anything beneath her. But she what it was, very, very quickly she sped off for the shore as fast as possible. As fast as she was going the shark was still faster, it got right beneath her, turned on it's back and licked her stomach. The shore was almost in reach, a few more strokes and she'd be safe.

Her hand was almost upon the land when something grabbed her ankle and pulled her down. Petrified she screamed while going down, getting a mouthful of nasty lake water. Knowing death was upon her she decided she'd go down fighting, looking down she was relieved/angered to see that it was not a shark holding on to her ankle, it was Kisame. Glaring at his blurry smiling face she flipped him the finger and booted him in the face. Being released she swam back up to the surface. Gasping and coughing she growled," There was never a shark in here, it was just a shark-man wanting a kick in the face."

"You didn't have to kick me so hard! Fuck that hurt." Kisame whined surfacing up beside Kenzie with a hand over his nose. A small trickle of blood seeped through his fingers, Kenzie still felt no guilt for how hard she'd kicked him.

"You deserved it for scaring the crap out of me. I plan on hurting Hidan and Kakuzu in some manner when I get a hold of them." Kenzie argued back, pulling herself out of the lake she sneezed and started shivering violently.

Kisame watched as Kenzie turned in a circle trying to figure out which way to go to get back to the cave. When she faced him again he pointed to the empty water beside him saying," They weren't lying about the shark. He's right beside me, and you may want to get a bandage, he cut you a little when he licked you."

Kenzie noticeably paled while saying," Thanks for the advice. Now help me get back to the cave BEFORE I die of hypothermia!"

Shrugging Kisame pulled himself out of the water, Kenzie slightly regretted her demand. For Kisame was wearing only a pair of ripped cut off shorts, the rest of him was blue, muscled and gorgeous. Unsurprisingly Kenzie got a nose bleed, which she hid by turning around with her hands over her nose. While Kenzie had her back turned Kisame looked back at the lake to wave good bye to his pet shark. Getting closer to Kenzie he asked," You do know you'll have to change your clothes when we get back, other wise you'll get sick."

The blood flow stopped just in time for Kenzie to whimper," B-but, I don't have any other clothes!"

"Heh, we know. That's why we made that your initiation. You have to find a new set of clothes, without going to Konan." Kisame beamed with the first cruel smile Kenzie's seen him have. He still looked hot, only evil hot.

Her eye twitched for a second before she said ina very annoyed voice," Not for one second will I ever regret kicking you in the face. But at least you gave me an easy initiation."

Kisame raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything, he just led her back to the cave. As they walked Kisame noticed that there was a clear path along the ground, pointing to it Kisame asked," This wouldn't have anything to do with you, would it?"

Looking down Kenzie remembered how many sticks, stones and hard dirt clumps her back had cleared off the ground. Unconsciously hugging herself for comfort she replied," I don't have anything to do with it. Try asking Hidan when you find him." Kisame figured out the cause after that. (As well he saw the multiple tears on the back of Kenzie's shirt earlier.)

Getting back to the cave Kenzie was slightly heart broken to find her only two friends playing 'Go-Fish' with Tobi and Deidara instead of wondering where she'd been. Walking past them Kenzie grabbed one of their ears and hauled them to the hallway. Tobi sat for a moment, deciding on whether to peek at Jenna and Takisha's cards or not. He was a good boy and didn't peek, but he did stop playing since Deidara always cheated.

Rubbing her sore ear Takisha asked grumpily," What was that for?"

"For not caring. And I need your help, achoo!" Kenzie sniffled, rubbing her cold icky nose.

Jenna clued on to Kenzie's current state before Takisha," Why are you all wet Kenzie?"

"Kakuzu and Hidan threw me into the lake. Now listen, Kisame told me my initiation is to find a new set of clothes but they can't come from Konan. Which leaves me with the only other option of stealing clothes from Itachi." Kenzie concluded giving them both meaningful glares.

Turning on her heel Jenna stated simply," I'm not getting involved!"

Takisha grabbed the back of her frilly choker and pulled Jenna back saying," Oh no you don't. You can suffer some more, I'm not doing whatever Kenzie wants us to do by myself."

Crossing her arms Jenna fumed," Fine, I'll wait until Kenzie says what we have to do, then I'll make my decision on doing it or not. What do you want us to do?"

"Distract Itachi and make sure he doesn't go into his room until I'm out." Kenzie answered giving Jenna a 'You're doing it, whether you want to or not.' look. Jenna frowned, getting the message. Takisha gave Kenzie a nod of approval.

Jenna's collar still in hand Takisha dragged Jenna down the hall to what she thought was Itachi's room, **(T: We need a map! J: You need to memorize the layout yourself xP T: That'll take too long, and too many mistakes. J:...Good point. I'll see what I can do.) **During the dragging Jenna muttered," That asshole better not try anything else. He's scarred my mind enough as is."

"I'm sure he's had his fill of torture for today. I know he had his fill of food. He cleaned his plate, TWICE! For such a feminin looking man he sure eats like a pig." Takisha finished by pulling her nose up like a pig snout. Jenna let out a little snort of humour approval.

"I heard that."

"AH!!" Spinning around the girls found Itachi glaring down at them with much hatred. Jenna instantly zipped behind Takisha for protection.

Laughing nervously Takisha squeaked," Hey I'm a chef, it's good to see my customers enjoying their meal! Eating like a pig is a great compliment to me. Besides Jenna and Kenzie are even worse eaters than you, ah ha ha ha." Takisha's attempt at making Itachi stop glaring was a huge failure. Hwever it did distract him long enough for Kenzie to slip in and out with a handful of clothing.

They didn't notice this until Kenzie yelled from the living room," Hey! At least I wasn't eating in a maid's outfit! Good one by the way Itachi, you must HAVE quite an interesting taste in CLOTHING. Well good night!" Kenzie then zipped off to the bedroom they were using.

Catching the message Takisha and Jenna smiled innocently, giving Itachi little waves they tried to make a run for it. They got to at least turn around before Itachi put a hand on their shoulders and said darkly," I don't know what you three just pulled off, but I'll find out sooner or later. When I do, you best hide yourselves to the best of your abilities." Shoving them off towards the living room Itachi didn't see that Takisha and Jenna were crying; they just had their graved dug early. Kenzie definitely owed them.

**- In the girl's disaster zone -**

"HAHAHAHAHA!!" Takisha and Jenna were laughing so hard tears were coming out of their eyes. When they'd gone back to the room they found Kenzie cocooned in a blanket. After much pulling and struggling Kenzie unravelled from the blanket, revealing herself to be wearing a mesh shirt (covered some but not all) and black track pants.

Kenzie rewrapped herself in the blanket, glaring at her joyful friends she mumbled miserably," It's not THAT funny, I'm cold and I have to get something else to wear over top of this shirt."

"Exactly why it's hysterical! You can't get back into Itachi's room for something else. Or you'll die for sure!" Takisha laughed, falling to the floor on her knees holding her stomach. Kenzie scrunched her face in frustration, she had very UNsupportive friends.

Throwing one of the left over pieces of trash on the floor at Takisha she demanded," If I can't take clothes from Itachi, then who should I take clothes from?"

Takisha calmed down after getting hit with a chicken bone, wiping away a tear she replied thoughtfully," Just go by size. Deidara is shorter than Itachi so that rules him out. The next tallest people after Itachi are Pein and Konan, but they're obviously out of the question. Leaving Kisame and Hidan, Kakuzu is definitely not going to have clothes in your size."

Eye twitching Kenzie made her newly appointed favorite expression (D8) shaking Takisha violently by the shoulders she whined (she's been doing that alot lately) "I don't want to steal clothes from Kisame! They won't fit!"

"It's overly larger, or overly exposed. Your choice." Takisha knew what Kenzie would choose, it was a no brainer.

Tears streaming down her face Kenzie tredged off to the door, before she could leave Jenna came into the room in a belly shirt and black shorts. Takisha raised an eyebrow and asked," Have you been gone the whole time? And who's room did you just raid?"

"Deidara's. He has a really nice room, he has a window! The fresh air smelt awesome! The loser didn't have anything decent besides this. Better than that damned skanky outfit." Jenna was in a much better mood after being freed of her clothing curse bestowed upon her by Itachi.

Kenzie looked more closely at the shorts Jenna was wearing, a crooked smile on her face she asked," Are those Deidara's boxers?" Takisha looked at Jenna with a rather hopeful gleam in her eyes; she wanted to laugh some more.

Avoiding their eyes Jenna crossed her arms and muttered," They're clean." Kenzie and Takisha just fell right to the floor laughing their asses off. Jenna stuck her tongue out and marched back out of the room and to the living room. There was no point in staying in there when she'd just be teased.

Calming down Kenzie wheezed," I am definitely NOT taking Kisame's boxers. Should we discreetly infor Deidara that he's missing a pair of boxers?" Kenzie added on as a last note heading out the door.

"I think that's a splendid idea." Takisha had one thing in common with Kenzie, they loved to make Jenna's life more difficult at times. It was worth the amount of trouble they'd get in later.

Snickering at how Deidara would react to Jenna wearing his boxers Kenzie snuck down the hallto where she hoped Kisame's room was. ' I wonder if I could talk Konan into drawing up a map, or even putting their names on their doors.' To her luck the room she was going for had it's door open a smidge, meaning it wasn't locked. There came no sound of anyone approaching (as if she'd hear them if they were coming, they're ninja :P) pushing the door open she got even luckier. No one was in the room and the size of the bed clearly indicated it was made for someone big, but not mosnter Kakuzu big. (There'd be blood everywhere if it was Hidan's room.)

Staying in stealth mode Kenzie tip toed forward to the dresser beside the bed, quietly pulling open the bottom drawer she found Kisame's cloaks. It seemed there was only enough room to fit two cloaks, closing it she moved up to the next drawer. This one held all his pants, this time there were three pairs. And by the amount of wear and tear they were the only three pairs Kisame owned...' That's kinda sad. ' Moving up to the drawer above Kenzie found what she was looking for, shirts. One problem though. There was only one shirt in the drawer, and if she took it and started wearing it she'd be caught faster than Jenna got freckles in the summer. This was a tough decision, but there were two drawers left. Maybe he had other shirts for some other reason, like pajama shirts.

Taking this possibility into consideration Kenzie pulled open the next drawer, it was empty of clothes, but filled with nail polish. That caught Kenzie WAY off guard, biting back a wave of hysteric laughter she pushed the drawer shut, took the only shirt from the other drawer and ran for it. As soon as she got back into the bedroom she cracked up with laughter. Takisha had been lounging on the bed enjoying the periodic quiet when Kenzie died on the floor laughing, raising an eyebrow she asked," You found something interesting in his room, didn't you?"

"Na-na-nail polish! He had a whole drawer of nail polish! I think he provides them all with the nail polish. It was so funny to see. I almost died on the spot." Kenzie managed to blab this out before collapsing in laughter again. Only this time Takisha joined her.

"What are you two cackling about, un?" Deidara asked falling from the ceiling and scaring the living crap out of Takisha and Kenzie. (He snuck in after Kenzie started laughing, Takisha didn't notice because she was focused on Kenzie.)

A hand over her heart Takisha yelled," You sneaky pervert! Don't come into the room without saying something! We'll tell Konan on you!" The only way Takisha knew how to scare a man was by threatning him with a female higher in power. It didn't work this time however.

Deidara waved a hand at her in dismissal, looking down at Kenzie (she was on the floor) he grinned evilly saying," I know what you just did, un. You stole Itachi-san and Kisame-san's clothes, un."

"And I care that you know why?" Kenzie asked challenging him.

Deidara stood with his back straight, in a proud voice he answered," I can tell them right now and laugh my ass off as Itachi-san kills you."

"If you do that, I can't tell you something you'll really want to know." Kenzie made that sentence sound almost daringly flirtatious, but to Deidara it sounded like the information she had was very important.

Squinting his eyes suspiciously he crouched down to eye level with Kenzie and demanded," Tell me, un. Or I'll tell Itachi you stole his boxers too, un." Kenzie flicked him on the nose for that, making his eyes water a little from the sting.

Crossing her arms Kenzie stated firmly," Nope. First you have to swear on evey last strand of your blonde hair not to tell Itachi and Kisame. And if you do tell them after I tell you my information, i get to shave your head. Deal?"

"You know I could always be mean and tell him myself. But I know you'll get me back in a very nasty way if I do." Takisha absentmindedly babbled, making Deidara want to know this big thing of information even more.

Just plain frustrated with the overwhelming curiosity in his empty head Deidara yelled," Fine! I swear on my hair not to tell Itachi or Kisame you stole their clothes. Now tell me, un!"

A devillish little smile on her face Kenzie said," Jenna stole your clothes. She's wearing your belly shirt and boxers for shorts." Deidara processed this information slowly. The first thing that he realized was that he'd been conned into believing this information was highly important. Secondly was what he'd just been told.

Very robotically Deidara stood up, walked out the door in the hallway and in a very creepish sweet voice he called out," Ooh Jenna! I need to have a word with you." Kenzie and Takisha could hear Jenna swearing at them from the living room, but it was only for a second, they cracked up laughing the second after.


	4. Rules

**Leader: You are all horrible failures of reviewers, you did not request someone to open, thus forcing me to do it. And don't think I don't know who you all are (glares at reviewers) I will be sending my men after you unless you tell us who you want to open, if I have to come back here I'll make sure you get an ear full!**

**T: Okay, is it just me or does he sound like a dad?**

**K: You're right, he does...Well there goes my respect for him.**

**J: (Watching Leader grow angrier with each comment.) Okay, time to disclaim before unnecessary slaughter ensues. I dont own any of the Akatsuki members, and we own ourselves.**

**Leader: (Still glaring at Takisha and Kenzie with blood lust)**

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Chapter Three - Rules

That same night the girls slept fairly well. (Regardless of the fact that they squeezed the three of them on the not so big bed.) Needless to say the dreams they had were all over the place. Kenzie dreamt of sharks eating her, Takisha dreamt of falling off a tower of plates and Jenna dreamt that her maid's outfit was strangling her. It was roughly 5:30 (according to the alarm clock yet to be unearthed beneath the bed) when the bedroom door creaked open. Using ninja stealth Hidan and Kakuzu crept into the room. Approaching the bed Kakuzu and Hidan revealed their weapons. A massive gong and the largest pots and pans from the kitchen. In sync with each other they counted to 3 in their heads and then, 'BANG!' 'BAM!' 'CRASH!' 'CRACK!' Hidan threw in a nice loud," WAKE UP SLEEPING UGLIES!!"

"AAAH!!" Came the chorus of screams as Jenna tried jumping out of the bed and fell on top of Kenzie, Kenzie in turn relfexively kicked out her legs while sitting up, thus pushing Takisha out of the bed entirely.

Kakuzu let out a big snort of amusement, throwing the pots and pans in the corner of the room (and making Takisha cringe at the sound) he announced," Get your asses in gear, you have two minutes to get out in the hall. At two minutes one second, Hidan delivers the pain penalty. Get it? Got it? Good. See you in two minutes." Kakuzu left the room, he also left Hidan to stand watch with the gong to make sure the girls didn't go back to sleep.

Jenna got up on her feet first, rubbing the sleep from her eyes she asked in a slurred groggy voice," Just what are we getting up for?"

"You'll see when you get to the living room, hurry up!" Hidan yelled at Kenzie; who was the last to get moving out og bed... She was bringing the bed with her (she had the massive comforter wrapped around her.) Since all three of them were on their feet Hidan got them moving out the door, he made a shadow clone that went behind them and kicked them in the ass, thus making them move. As well as complain.

"Hey! You don't need to push, I can move by myself. Kenzie just needs to be shoved out the door." Jenna whined, speed walking to keep Hidan's feet away from her butt. Kenzie was ahead of her a fraction, so it was quite simple for her to trip Jenna.

Takisha was beside Jenna, so when she fell to the floor she almost got pulled down with her. Managing to just dodge the face plant opportunity she grumped," Don't bring me down with you. I feed you remember."

"That reminds me, no breakfeast this morning. And get moving Spots. Before I have to drag you the rest of the way." Hidan threatened, stopping in front of Jenna's motionless form on the floor. He waited another second for her to get up, when she didn't he gave her a light stomping on the back, earning a loud,"UUGH!" Jenna then proceeded to first wiggled, then crawl after the others. Hidan accepted that as good enough.

Going into the living room the girls found it to be totally dark, (they don't have any windows or anything like that in the living room, they do have electricity, they just don't have them on.)The girls couldn't even feel Hidan behind them anymore. Huddling close to each other Takisha whispered," I don't know what's worse, not being able to see anything, or not eating breakfeast."

As soon as Takisha finished saying that the lights came on, blinding them for a brief moment. When their eyes cleared the girls found that the Akatsuki members stood in a circle around them. Leader stepped forward and said in his best authority voice," Mackenzie Lynn Bishop, Takisha Maria Alean Petroff, Jenna Noel Wygergangs. You have been brought into the depths of darkness, the lair of our organization. At this time we must bind you to the cave under our law."

"Uh..." Came the chorused response from the girls. They didn't have a clue what Leader just said to them.

Konan leaned down and whispered," He's saying you're going to hear the rules of the house."

"Oooh." You could hear the eyes rolling in the room. When the girls looked bacl to Leader to continue he pointed to a chart paper that wasn't there a minute ago and read off it," Rule One: No killing each other, or anyone else unless told to or have no other option. Rule Two: If you leave the cave you will be escorted by one of the members. Rule Three: No raping, molesting or sexually harrassing the other members. Meaning you girls can't do that to them, but they can to you."

"WHAT?! WHAAT?!...KOOONAAN!!" In need of role model support the girls glomped Konan with tears in their eyes.

Konan struggled to break free, failed, gave up and turned to Leader," That rule isn't very fair. You should change it a little to be a decent leader."

Leader rubbed his chin in thought for a second before deciding," Fine. You can't rape them, they can still rape you but only if they wear protection. Now the final rule: Do your share of the work to keep food on the table. Oh, and after this meeting you will be tested to see which group you belong with, as well you will be taught the basics in order to keep yourself alive. That is all."

As Leader left with Konan the guys let loose with their thoughts on the change of rule three.

Deidara:" I liked the old rule, un. Wearing protection takes all the fun out of it, un."

Hidan: "Intercourse with females isn't against Jashin's law, but stopping the possibility of creating offspring to worship him is."

Kakuzu: "Dammit, now I'm going to lose money on condom purchases."

Sasori: "..."

Itachi: "..."

Kisame: "..."

Tobi: "??"

Zetsu: "We don't mate with females, only eat them."

Since the guys were occuppied with their talking Jenna whispered to the other two," I think we should sneak over to the kitchen now while they're not paying attention. I don't want to go through testing hell on an empty stomach."

"I agree. You coming Kenzie?" Takisha asked the mass of blanket with a face. Kenzie just shrugged, she wasn't really hungry yet, but she didn't want to stay around with a bunch of potential rapists.

Very quietly the three of them tip toed towards the door they came in from, they were almost home free when Tobi noticed the girls were leaving. Being the obnoxious man-child he was he called out," Jenna-chan, Takisha-chan, Kenzie-chan! Where are you going?!" The girls didn't need to turn around to know that all the guys were watching them now.

Three seconds of silence went by before Takisha yelled," RUN!!" Thus set the girls running for the bedroom, a place they felt would be better to hide in.

Before they could reach the door Hidan's scythe-whip snared their ankles in a loop, bringing them down hard on their faces. Dragging them back towards the mob of Akatsuki members Hidan asked maliciously," Just where do you think you're going girls? You have a few tests to do."

"Are these tests pen and paper, or physical?" Kenzieinquired once Hidan stopped dragging them.

"It's a hundred percent physical. And if you try to run away then I'll bring you right back and make you swim in the lake." Sasori threatened while wiggling his fingers. The girls groaned and developed large clouds of doom above their heads. They could tell that day was going to be a long one. A long and painful one.


	5. Tests and Placement

**J: Alrighty, I'm loving the many reviews I've gotten over the LOOONG period of time that it's taken me to type, which I apologize for. And some of them are just down right hysterical...if not frightening ahha (-.-') And now here's Pein, who was requested by Murasaki Shikibu who has an infatuation with his duck covered boxers, "Coughs over snicker"**

**Leader:....I do not own any duck covered boxers.**

**Konan: "cough"LIES"cough"**

**Leader: "Blush-glare" Konan what are you doing here?**

**Konan: Making sure you don't kill her. "Points to Murasaki Shikibu who is sneaking off with Pein's duck covered boxers."**

**M.S: "Stops, smiles" Uh.....Hi?....BYE! "Runs for it."**

**Leader:.....Those were my favorite boxers too.**

**Konan: "Pats Leader sympathetically on the shoulder"**

**Leader: "Sighs" Jenna does not own any of the Naruto characters named in her fanfiction. Now excuse me while I go look for some new animal covered boxers. "Walks off sulking."**

* * *

**Chapter Four - Tests and Placements**

**Test One: Speed.**

"Your first test will be to see your speed limitations. The faster you go the happier we'll be. The slower you go, the more pain you feel." Kisame explained pleasently, watching in amusement as Kenzie stayed relaxed while Takisha and Jenna groaned. Jenna louder than Takisha.

Itachi pointed to the trail that led to the lake, " You run to the lake and back as fast as possible." The way he said it had an undertone that added on, ' I'll gladly beat you myself if you take too long.'

Kisame looked up at the sky and finished the info session by saying," You can warm up for three seconds, when I say go, you go, no ifs, ands, or buts. That is unless you want Hidan on your ass." That got the girls going pretty quick. Jenna went into jumping jakcs, Takisha did sit ups and Kenzie went into a row of burpies.

Kisame leaned towards Kakuzu and whispered," I'm betting 50 bucks that Kenzie gets back first." Kakuzu nodded and wrote it down in his bet book. Right beside Kisame's name was Deidara, Zetsu, and Itachi, all of them bet on Kenzie being first with either 20 or 50 bucks.

The three seconds up Kisame yelled," GO!" And the girls were off...In bare feet, something the guys did not take into consideration. Though it didn't affect the results, Kenzie pulled ahead of Takisha and Jenna easily. And Takisha pulled ahead of Jenna, leaving her in the dust of not one, but two people. Jenna was anything but athletic.

Kenzie saw the lake come up into view, but she also saw Hidan standing in front of the lake with a smile and his arms crossed. The blood in Kenzie's feet went cold for a second, giving her a brief warning of trouble she couldn't control. Stopping one metre away from Hidan she asked a little breathlessly," What are you doing? You're in my way."

"You gotta get past me for your instant decision test, you never know when an obstacle such as the enemy may come inbetween you and your mission objective. Better be quick, your friends are catching up." Hidan said all this in a highly amused voice.

Kenzie looked back over her shoulder and saw Takisha catching up, Jenna was nothing but a speck among the trees. Making her 'ready-to-kill' face Kenzie kinda shouted," Hidan, move, I don't want Itachi coming after me!"

"Awww, too bad. Hey kiddies, welcome to the delay party." Hidan joked when Takisha and Jenna (barely) caught up to Kenzie. Standing next to the grumpy Kenzie Takisha asked breathlessly," What's the big deal?"

"Hidan's being an ass and blocking the way for his own amusement and I know that's the truth! No matter what bullshit you say." Kenzie growled, her foot tapping impatiently.

Hidan shrugged but stayed where he was, Jenna took this stalled opportunity to catch her breathe. Kenzie scrunched her mouth in thought while Takisha came up with her own idea, getting a devillish grin on her face she taunted," Jashinism must be a hard religion, especially when you can't do everything you want. What can't you do?"

"You suck at distractions kid." Hidan wasn't amused that his religion was being used as one of he saddest distraction he's ever heard of.

Crossing her arms Takisha argued," No I don't, and I wasn't even trying yet. I was trying to start a casual conversation, but nooo. You had to be Mr. Jerk."

"You still suck at it, and now you're just being annoying." Hidan was starting to let his blood get to his head. Takisha countered back, trying to keep a smile from her mouth. For her distraction idea was working. Her plan was to distract Hidan with a crappy arguement, as he argued with her, Kenzie dragged Jenna over to the trees. Hidan watched that, but he turned back to Takisha when she bitched back and didn't see Kenzie tip toe further down away from Hidan.

Smirking she gave Takisha a thumbs up and went to the lake's edge, her hand skimmed the surface of the water when someone pushed her in from behind. Splashing and spluttering for a minute before getting her barings. Looking at the spot she'd been standing on a second ago she gasped in disbelief, Takisha was running away holding her sides laughing. Kenzie had been set up! Takisha kept running but had the time to yell over her shoulder," Enjoy the water! And Hidan's company!"

"Wha-Hey! You meanie butt!" Kenzie screamed after her, waving her fist and getting out of the water. She'd have to steal clothes from Kisame. AGAIN!

Kenzie was too distracted by her anger to notice that Hidan was in the water behind her, waiting until she was almost out Hidan laughed and pulled her back in saying," FAIL!!" Kenzie squeaked and took in a mouthful of water.

Takisha had a smile on her face for her whole run back, in her head she thought happily, 'It's so nice having someone like Hidan around to help you cheat. I can't wait to see the looks on the guys faces when I come back fist. And knowing Kakuzu he's probably got a few bets going on with them. I should deman some of the money...I probably won't get any though.' Takisha could see the end of the path coming up, knowing victory was close to being hers she sped up her pace. Had she kept her steady medium pace she might have noticed the loop of rope on the ground before she put her foot in it. The second her foot went in the loop it pulled tight around her ankle and hauled her upside down. Her face red from the blood rush Takisha yelled," WHAT THE HELL?!?"

"You're not the only one who can cheat by bargaining." Jenna said happily while stepping out from behind a tree, Hidan's shadow clone right beside her.

Thrashing about in pure anger Takisha shouted," You are SO dead when I get down from here Jenna! And what did Jenna offer you Hidan? I'll double it if you let me down!"

Hidan's shadow clone raised an eyebrow and asked," You can double yourself so I can sacrifice you twice when you're near death? I'd like to see that."

"You're letting him sacrifice you?! What the fuck Jenna?!?!" Takisha couldn't believe that her best friend would seriously throw her life away to win a simple test race.

Shaking her head Jenna explained," Nooo. The deal was that he could sacrifice me,IF I was close to dying already. And I don't plan on dying soon. But I _do_ plan on winning and watching the guys go crazy in disbelief. See ya!" That cleared up Jenna took off as fast as she could, she didn't trust that Kenzie would be held back much longer.

As expected, when Jenna showed up first all the guys (including Itachi) looked like someone had just smacked them with a two by four. Barely managing to speak Kisame asked," H-how, how did..._**you**_ get back first?!"

Between triumphant breathes Jenna answered," You...never said... we couldn't...cheat. And Hidan...helped." Shaking from running more than she liked to Jenna sat down on the ground to finish catching her breathe.

Kisame, Itachi, Deidara and Zetsu glared over at Kakuzu, who had conviently disappeared while everyone paid attention to Jenna. Yanking on his hair Deidara screamed," That swindling son of a bitch! I'm gonna blow him up, un!" Deidara then ran back to the lair, ready to kill the first thing that looked like Kakuzu.

Some crashing and snapping of tree branches informed them that Kenzie and Takisha were coming. Jenna had a feeling that they'd more than happily take their Hidan enduced frustration out on her, getting up on her feet she quickly slipped behind Kisame and whispered," Don't move, they can't see me here and I don't want them to see me. Pleeease!"

"Hey, if you want to hide behind someone, hide behind Itachi." Kisame grumped taking a step to the side.

Running on the spot Jenna whined," B-but, Itachi's too skinny to hide me!" Jenna had a prickling sensation go down her back, somehow she'd developed Itachi senses, for Itachi now stood right behind her.

Kisame coughed back a laugh and watched from the corner of his eye to see what happened. Itachi leered down at Jenna for a moment before saying," I wouldn't be able to hide you anyways, you're too large." Kisame didn't cover his laugh that time, he threw his head back and laughed loud and hard.

Pissed off Jenna glared, attempted to kick Itachi in the shin, failed epicly and ended up on her back by Itachi tripping her up. Of course a dripping wet and leaf covered Takisha emerged from the trees at that same instant. Both girls set their flaming eyes of death on Jenna, lunging forward to strangle her they chorused," YOU'RE DEAD!!" The guys then watched (took notes) as Jenna was almost ripped apart.

**- 15 Minutes Later -**

Kenzie was now dry and in a decent set of clothes donated by Konan, Takisha had also cleaned up and was wearing a set of Kisame's old clothes. Jenna was still in tatters with a bloody lip and after bruises. Pein ignored all this as he spoke," Alright, that test finished you now have two left before you can relax. Your next test is to see how well you handle a fight of both hand to hand combat, and weapon use."

"Oh good, we're dead meat." Takisha moaned in despair, Kenzie and Jenna chorused her words by nearly crying.

Rolling his eyes Pein looked at a paper Konan just handed him, nodding in approval he read aloud," You'll each be partnered with someon who chose you. And you will be in seperate areas within our perimeters. Mackenzie, you have been chosen by Kisame. Takisha you were fought over by Hidan and Deidara, but Hidan won...some how. Jenna you weren't chosen by anyone, so I'm pairing you up with Kakuzu."

This setup was clearly unfair, and the girls voiced this as such.

Kenzie - " Greeeeat. I get to be shredded to death...On an empty stomach. Could this be any better?"

Takisha - " WHY?! WHY COULDN'T DEIDARA HAVE WON?! IT WOULD HAVE BEEN A QUICK DEATH! WHY DOES LIFE HATE ME SO MUCH?!!?"

Jenna - " What the fuck?! Kakuzu?! KAKUZU?! He'll step on me and win! I only come up to his **thigh **Saint Jimmy's sake!" **(J: That is actually true, Kenzie and I have done some measuring and I do only go up to his thigh. If we haven't told you already, I am the shortest of the three of us. T: Not to mention the weakest. K: And slowest. J: OKAY! THEY GET THE POINT!!)**

Pein raised an eyebrow at this outbreak of drama and asked Konan," Did they ever act like this back in their dimension?"

"Not really. At least things won't be as boring around here. Do your best girls!" Konan waved the girls off as a mother would wave off her children to school. Only they weren't going to school. They were going to die.

Kisame scooped Kenzie up under his arm, then carried her away to death. Hidan simply kicked Takisha off towards the door, it made her go faster than Kisame and Kenzie. Jenna was mercilessly dragged away by Kakuzu. When they were out of sight Sasori popped up out of nowhere and asked Pein," Can I use their bodies for puppets after they die?"

Hands on her hips Konan argued," They won't die, and Jenna already gave Hidan permission to sacrifice her before she dies. Now go observe and take notes for us."

Cocking his head to the side Sasori asked curiously," Why don't you take the notes yourself?"

" ' Cause we'll be in our chambers..."Discussing" possible placements for the girls. Now go." Konan needn't bother lying to Sasori about what they were actually going to do, but it did save him the mental images no one wanted.

**- Outside close to the entrance -**

" I'll be a gentleman and let you go first Kenzie, so you best make it a good one." Kisame said all this with an eerie smile on his face. Kenzie gulped but got into the left neutral fighting position she'd been taught in karate class. In her mind Kenzie thought nervously, ' He never acted all creepy like this back in our world...Come to think of it Hidan seem a little more calm too. Must have been the chemical filled water. So what was I doing? Oh yeah, I need to make the first move....But I don't know how!' Drawing a total blank on what to do Kenzie meekly said to Kisame," Uh, I don't know what to do, so you can just go and beat me up now."

"Well you're oodles of fun. Fine, but remember, I offered you a chance." Kisame said a tad annoyed that his fight wouldn't give him much practice, actually it wouldn't give him **any** practice.

Hoisting Samehada up off the ground he stood in the offensive position for maybe a second then launched forward in a mad dash that brought up a dust cloud. Kenzie's blood went cold, a signal of pain about to befall her. She wished her brain would be merciful and let her black out after the first hit...Sadly that wish didn't come true. The hit Kisame delivered to Kenzie's gut not only knocked the wind out of her, but it also knocked her onto her back where she could only lay and gasp for breathe. Life was being very unfair to her that day.

**- Deeper in the woods -**

Life may have been unfair to Kenzie, but the universe was being unfair to Takisha. The very second Hidan finished kicking her into the forest he pulled out his scythe and whipped it at Takisha. Just managing to dodge it Takisha screeched," You could have given me a minute to get ready you jerk!!"

"Too bad sweet heart, in this world you got to be ready at any second to fend off an attack. I'm impressed you managed to dodge that attack alone. But I highly doubt you'll survive THIS!!" Throwing a barrage of smoke pellets at Takisha he waited for the smoke to completely blind her before casting his scythe in her general direction.

He was pleased and slightly upset to feel his scythe come in contact with something, by the feel of the impact the scythe must have gone straight through her and into a tree. Approaching before the smoke cleared he slightly laughed," I had a feeling those girls wouldn't last long...Huh?"

Going into the smoke he found that his scythe hadn't gone straight through Takisha, it'd just gone straight into the tree. Takisha stood just to the left of the scythe, her eyes wide as frisbees she gulped," You know that would have killed me if it hit, right?"

"That was kinda the point, but you're damned lucked I missed. But I'll get you this time!" Hidan yelled, retracting his scythe then whipping it at Takisha again.

With a shriek Takisha was off running, dodging one scythe attack after another. Her poor legs couldn't take much more, they were aching and burning in complaint of being overused. Maybe if she found a good hiding spot she could take a breather. Hidan's scythe landed an inch behind her heels, bringing tears to her eyes she thought, ' Guess that idea's out of the question. Why couldn't I have gotten Deidara?!'

**- Close to the lake - **

" Hey, how about you do us both a favor and just throw me in the lake, that way we don't have to watch me squirm in agony. How's that sound?" Jenna suggested in high hopes of getting out of a beating. Kakuzu seemed to be taking the idea into consideration, but not for very long.

Holding out his hand Kakuzu asked point blank," How much you going to pay me shrimp?"

Disbelief on her face Jenna replied depressed," I don't have any money! You knew that already, so why bother asking?" Jenna knew where this was going, and it wasn't uphill.

Glaring with the smallest of smiles on his mouth Kakuzu chuckled darkly," I asked just to make sure you weren't holding out on me, and I was just going to beat you and toss you to Kisame's pet anyways. Don't worry, I won't be gentle either." Just like that Kakuzu released half of his tentacles. Crying before they even touched her Jenna sent a quick prayer up to her god for a quick end.

The first thing to happen was her ankles were wrapped up and pulled from under her, putting her on her back. The wind knocked out of her she gasped," I'm starting to wish I got Itachi, OW!!" In the midst of her wheezed muttering Kakuzu whipped down a tentacle right across her stomach. Right after her ankles were released, only to have her wrists tied up and her body lifted off the ground. Really high off the ground, higher than Kakuzu's head. Keeping her eyes straight ahead Jenna could only think ,' Okay, now I REALLY wish I'd gotten Itachi. Mangekyoing is better than dying.'

Below her Kakuzu chuckled and called up to her," You know the point of this was to test how well you can fight back, not give up." He highly doubted she'd find a way to fight back at that moment.

A tugging from the bottom on his cloak drew his attention away from the fun he was having. Standing beside him looking bored was Itachi. Raising an eyebrow Kakuzu asked," What do you want Uchiha?"

"You're not torturing her enough if that's what you're trying to do. You need to draw blood or tears to do it right." Itachi advised sullenly. At the time beating Jenna sounded boring since he did that already, but watching her suffer in the hands of Kakuzu made him realize he'd rather be doing it in Kakuzu's place.

Kakuzu's eyes showed annoyance at the same time he said," No, I wasn't torturing her. I'm trying to make her fight, but she obviously doesn't know how."

"That's not true! I've taken karate lessons, but I can't use them while hanging 50 fucking feet in the air!" Jenna had overheard the gist of what they were saying since a small wind was blowing their words to her.

Rolling his eyes Kakuzu called up," What you learned back at home won't help you here Shrimp! Here someone like Tobi could beat you senseless!" After Jenna's face dropped he let her go, right into the lake. Her plunge was complimented by a nice loud 'SPLASH!'

**- Back with Kenzie -**

Most of her clothing was shredded, as well as a few spots on her skin. Panting hard to catch her breathe Kenzie was supporting herself on her hands and knees, (a position any man would love to see a girl in) Kisame loomed over her with Samehada poised for the next attack, in a dark chuckle he asked," Do you surrender, or would you rather be shredded naked. I can always call Deidara over to 'admire' you're current position and my handiwork."

Glaring up at Kisame Kenzie growled," I surrender, for now. But I'll get you back some day. Mark my words." Kenzie felt kind of stupid after saying that last bit. **(J: I REAAAALLLY want to make Kisame say, "Consider them marked." You know what movie that's from?)**

Kisame gave her a half sneer of laughter, bending down he flicked her nose and breathed right in her face," I'll make sure not to fall asleep during the time, I wouldn't want to flatten you by mistake." He laughed as Kenzie coughed and gagged from the rank of Kisame's breathe. Walking away he thought to himself, 'I wonder how bdaly she'll want to kill me when I send Deidara to help get her back to the lair? Can't wait see, heehee.'

Letting herself fall on her face Kenzie groaned into the dirt, a bed and food would be really nice at that moment. But would she get it, no. Of course not. If anything they'll give her work or let someone else beat the living crap out of her. Non of that would happen if she didn't get back to the cave, which would a hell in itself in the condition she was in. 'Let's start by rolling onto my stomach.' Using the little strength she had left Kenzie pushed herself up off the ground, rocking her body she went off balance and rolled onto her stomach. It hurt, alot. "Owwwwiieeee."

"You're really pathethic, un." Deidara announced his presence by saying that whule leaning over Kenzie and getting right in her face.

In her head Kenzie swore, ' Damn you sharkman!' To Deidara she growled," What are you doing here you blonde freak of nature?"

Devillish smile upon his face Deidara leaned even closer, almost making him kiss her. He was even more of a bastard and pinned her arms down too, in an almost seductive tone he replied," Kisame sent me to drag your cute pathetic ass back to the base. But I'm tempted to ruffle you up a bit first, what you think, un?"

"Do anything and I will shiskabob your ass. Now get off me." It took every ounce of Kenzie's will power not to shiver her blood was so cold.

Laughing under his breathe Deidara cooed," Hmmm, I might like to see that, un. But do't worry, I won't get you now. It's not very mood setting, for now I'll just have to settle with this." Lightning quick Deidara kissed Kenzie on the forehead and slung her on his bacl.

Wiggling around on his back Kenzie roared," YOU ARE SO DEAD!!! PUT ME DOWN SO I CAN KILL YOU!!!" Deidara ignored the death commands and continued on to the lair. However he would be deaf by the time they got there thanks to Kenzie's continuous roaring.

**- With Takisha -**

'Please don't look up. Please don't look up.' Takisha had managed to get enough distance between her and Hidan then managed to climb half way up a 10 foot tree. It wasn't until she was up the tree and Hidan stood beneath her that she realized she'd screwed herself over with this manuever.

She had no where to run if he found her up in the tree, and even if he didn't find her in the tree, he'd definitely hear her when she attempted to climb down the tree "quietly." Either way she was pretty much screwed, that was unless Hidan left all together. And the chances of that happening were, "Ah screw it. She wants to starve out here in the woods she can go ahead and do that. YOU HEAR ME?! YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN NOW GIRL!!" Hidan made sure to hide his sinister smirk before leaving out of Takisha's sight. He knew she was up in the tree, but he wanted to see the look on her face when he took her by surprise.

Takisha may be blonde to the extreme sometines, but right then wasn't one of those times. In this world you needed alot of brains to match someone's brawns. She watched as Hidan made a show of pretending to leave back to the lair, she caught just the slightest hint of his cloak vanish behind the next tree over. ' Maybe I can use this to my advantage...Highly doubt it but it'll be better than sitting in this tree getting sap all over me.' Looking around Takisha found a bunch of acorns in arms reach. If Hidan made a lunge for her when she got on the ground she could honestly say she defended herself. Leaning towards the acorns she muttered to herself," If I survive this I can rub it in Jenna's face." In the process of muttering and reaching for the acorns Takisha didn't notice that the branch she was on had the smallest of cracks near the trunk due to past storms. With Takisha's added weight the branch's crack spread and broke.

It wasn't until she lightly brushed the closest acorns that she heard a loud, 'CRRRACK!' There was a brief moment of gravity free air before she went crashing down to earth, bringing down four thick tree branches with her. Falling flat on her back, the wind knocked out of her lungs she barely managed to wheeze," Damn trees are on their side."

"HA! If that were the case we wouldn't need Zetsy on look out. Now say thank you to Jashin since I'm being merciful." Hidan smugly exclaimed coming out from behind the tree she'd seen him disappear behind.

Sighing in defeat she muttered," Thaaanks...Now can you help me up please?" Instant reply from Hidan was him grabbing one of her outstretched hands and dragging her, literally dragging her back to the lair. Of course she whined and threatened not to feed him the whole way. But it just made him drag her faster.

**- In the lake -**

'Cough' 'Cough' "Ugh, now I know how Kenzie felt yesterday. Only she can actually swim, so this is even worse for me....Oh great, Kakuzu left Itachi to make sure I didn't drown. Good bye life." Her fare well said Jenna proceeded to start doggie paddling for the shore, away from Itachi.

Doggie paddling takes alot of energy, energy Jenna didn't have since she didn't eat breakfeast. So it was maybe seven minutes after she started that her arms and legs got tired. Just barely managing to keep her head above the water she groaned," Now I remember why I always stay in shallow water."

Thinking fast before she drowned Jenna flipped onto her back and continued swimming that way. Only problem with that way of swimming was not being able to see where you're going, and Itachi was aware of that flaw. Jenna heard a muffled, 'SPLASH' ; Kenzie had mentioned something about a shark. On high alert she sped up her arm and leg movements, it helped maybe...three percent. Itachi had to hesitate a second before reaching up and pulling Jenna down into the water, screaming at the same time she went under she unevitably inhaled a mouthful of water. No air in her system she immediately blacked out. Itachi (in nothing but his boxers) took notice of the lack of resistance. Going back to the surface he was a tad annoyed to see that his victim had deprived him of any torture enjoyment when he wanted it, but he could still use this turn of events to his own amusement.

Towing her lifeless body to the shore he laid her down on the ground and listened to her breathing...She wasn't breathing, perfect. Proceeding with mouth to mouth recesitation, after five tries Jenna finally coughed up all the water she'd swallowed. Once she could breathe normally she groaned," Urrrgh. My head feels like a tree hit me...What the hell are you doing?" It took her a second to open her eyes and find Itachi hovering over her face.

His mouth twisted into a crooked smile, he answered calmly," You owe me big time for that." Saying nothing else he got up and hoy his clothes back on, perfectly aware that Jenna was now blushing and confused.

Getting on her feet she thought nervously,' Why do I have the feeling I'm missing something vital. I'll probably find out when he wants something from me.' Taking a few steps Jenna found she couldn't walk, thus why she ended up falling on her face, as well as growling into the dirt. Itachi managed to decipher a few things from the growls, " Legs won't move...Ant going to crawl up my nose...Dirt tastes bad."

Fully dressed Itachi went back to Jenna, looping his arms around her waist and pulling her off the ground (much to her objection) he offered," Shoulder or bridal style?"

"Shoulder." She murmured through grit teeth. She wasn't surprised when Itachi did the opposite and held her bridal style. Too tired and cold to complain Jenna let him get away with this act in silence, though once Takisha and Kenzie saw them arrive in this manner it wouldn't be so silent.

**- In the living room five minutes later -**

"Alright, I've carefully gone over the data gathered from your tests and I've chosen your groups that you'd best benefit. Kenzie you will be working with Itachi and Kisame, Takisha you'll be with Hidan and Kakuzu, and Jenna you're with Zetsu. You'll start officially working with them the week after next week. During next week we'll be getting your rooms properly set up...And Konan's taking you shopping for your own clothes." Leader read all this off a sheet of paper him and Konan had composed.

Looking up at the girls he couldn't help but sweat drop. Takisha was already crying at the future bruises she'd get. Kenzie's was sitting in the corner furthest from Itachi and Kisame, **(J: Uchiha corner! xD "Snickers at inside joke.")** and Jenna was thanking the gods of that dimension for not being stuck with Itachi and Kisame.

Tobi bounced patiently on the heels of his feet, once Leader finished speaking he raised his hand and waved it around to get Leader's attention. Sighing Leader asked," Yes, Tobi? What is it?"

"Can Takisha-chan make food now?" Tobi asked hopefully, his stomach starting a chain reaction of demanding grumbles. After the chorus of singing stomachs everyone gave Leader looks of pleading, they were all hungry and food of any kind (even Konan's cooking) would be delicious at that moment.

Giving a nod and a wave he let them go raid the poor defenseless kitchen. Konan waited until the living room had cleared out to ask," Do you think they'll help the guys out at all? They are just newbies after all."

"I'm sure a few life threatning situations will be enough to get them going. Now do you want to eat? Or take advantage of everyone being in the kitchen?" Wrapping an arm around her waiste he smiled sexily at her **(J,K,T: "Covers ears from squealing fan girls using their imaginations.") **daring her to refuse him. Of course she didn't and allowed him to carry her off to the bedroom.

**(T,K, J: "Shudders." T: You're going to make them do the nasty alot aren't you? J: "Shrugs" Depends on whether we need Konan or not. K: Could you make it more subtle at least? I mean, that's just...ew. J: Good point, I'l keep it down to a minimum on the PDA and such. T: Thanks, we appreciate it greatly. My ears especially, anymore fangirl screams and I'll be deaf. K: I second that.)**


	6. Clothes Shopping

**J: Sorry for an update that could have come sooner, but I've been distracted alot by one particular fanfiction. And NOOOW! Here is your disclaimer for today!**

**Tsu: "Stretches out and yawns" Huuh? Wh-where am I?**

**J: You are here.**

**K: You could be more specific.**

**T: To be more specific, you are in Jenna's fanfiction because a reviewer named ThexxMoonxxHides asked you to be here.**

**Tsu:....So....I don't have to do any paper work?**

**J: Not until you're done disclaiming...or Shizune finds you first.**

**Tsnu: Right....Well I guess if I draw this out I can stay away from work longer.**

**"POOF"**

**Shi: LADY TSUNADE!!**

**Tsu: "Sigh" Lasted long enough I guess. Jenna does not own any of the Akatsuki characters, and the girls own themselves. "Gets dragged off by Shizune."**

**J,TK: We kinda feel bad for her.**

**

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Chapter Five - Clothes Shopping

Unsurprisingly the remainder of last week went by slowly and painfully... For Konan that is ; Jenna, Takisha and Kenzie went through more of her clothes than the guys went through cloaks. And that's saying alot. So she was more than happy to go barging into the girl's (clean) room practically singing," Rise and shine girls! It's shopping day! C'mon up, up, up!"

"Nooooo. Sleeeeep." Kenzie moaned, pulling the blanket up over her head, taking more away from Takisha and Jenna. They were both getting up anyways, so the lack of blanket didn't bother them.

Rubbing her eyes Takisha asked," I don't think any stores would be open this early, so why the rush?"

"I'm just too excited, plus a ninja is always ready to get moving no matter the time and situation. So come on! Some of the others are already up and they want breakfeast." Konan directed that last part to Takisha, who in turn gave Konan a face that said, ' They're getting lazier by the day, you need to start whipping them out of it.' Konan just shrugged with a smile.

After Konan left the room Kenzie grumbled from beneath the blanket," How much you wanna bet that Kuzu will limit the amount of clothes we get to a ridiculous amount. Like one of everything."

"With Konan's wardrobe on the line after ours gets ruined? I highly doubt he'll get away with that." Jenna retorted back while heading out the door, hissing through her teeth at the same time. **(J: Open door cave, the floors would be freezing! And we don't have any socks ****OR**** shoes. T: I hate cold floors...And I like socks. K: Me too, but you don't see me whining about it. J,T: Yet.)**

Takisha followed after a second later, Kenzie wrapped up in the blankets behind her. (Takisha is actually dragging Kenzie on the floor by a corner of the blanket.) Going into the kitchen a drowsy voice yawned," Finally, un. I was about ready to go and blow you out of bed."

"If you had you wouldn't have gotten any food. And you can all wait a couple more minutes, I need my morning dose of tea." Takisha retorted heading for the kettle on the stove. **(T: I would be drinking coffee in the morning, but they don't have any. "Cries.") **A chorus of groans and dark muttering came from the hungry risers, but Takisha had already gotten use to them. It was the days they didn't respond in that manner that she feared.

Jenna and Kenzie took their usual seats at the end of the already crowded table. (Pein was currently badgering Kakuzu to buy another extension for the table.) As their new morning routine kicked in both girls took what time they could to sleep on the table (Kenzie) and eavesdrop on anything the guys were bitching about (Jenna.) They did this until Takisha cooked and served breakfeast, or sometimes caught or abruptly woken. That morning just happened to be a different one. Jenna casually doodled on the table with her finger when she heard," What are you going to choose Deidara?"

"I'm thinking dark fairy, un. How bout you Hidan?" Deidara asked quietly across the table. Whatever they were talking about wasn't their normal table bitching.

Lightly nudging Kenzie she whispered," Listen to what they're saying, it sounds weird." Kenzie acknowledged this by slightly moving her elbow away from her ear.

"If nothing was an option that'd be my choice, but since it's not I'll have to go with the next best thing. Slave rags, hahaha!" Hidan's choice of clothing helped the girls figure out that outfits were what they were talking about, but who they were for was a whole other need to know.

Kakuzu eagerly agreed," That kind of outfit sounds the cheapest, I say we get all three of them slave rags. The blue haired bitch'll fight me on that one though dammit."

"Okay, your choices for breakfeast. Eggs and bacon, or oatmeal." Takisha called out over the noises, the clothing talk died down instantly so Takisha could get everyone's choice of food. Unsurprisingly the majority of them chose eggs and bacon, the only people who didn't were Itachi, Kakuzu, Jenna and Kenzie. (Kenzie's a vegetarian, no matter where she goes.)

As Takisha got to work on the food the earlier conversation picked up again," Danna, what are you picking out?" Deidara had to dodge a projectile spoon after asking.

Sasori replied regardless of the infuriating nick name," I'm not entirely sure, but it's going to have frills, that is guaranteed." That set off a wave of snickering from the guys. Jenna and Kenzie were getting really annoyed now, they wanted to know who was going to be forced to wear these clothes.

The snickers stopped quickly when Takisha passed out the bowls of oatmeal, when Takisha put the bowls down in front of Jenna and Kenzie she noticed that they were sucking in their lips. Giving them a suspicious look she pulled back the bowls demanding," Tell me what's going on, now or you starve."

Jenna motioned for Takisha to lean down so she could whisper in her ear. Keeping an eye on Kenzie Takisha put her ear close to Jenna's mouth, "The guys seem to be talking about outfits they'll choose, and I have the feeling that they're buying them for you." That took some colour out of Takisha's face.

Dropping the bowls she kept her eyes wide and shuffled back to the stove. This time as she cooked she paid more attention to the conversations going on at the table. The guys waited until the first couple of eggs were in the frying pan to start talking, Kisame looked at Itachi and asked," I'm really curious about your choice Itachi, I know you're saving the maid theme for your freckled toy."

Itachi calmly swallowed his mouthful of oatmeal before responding in his monotone voice," I'm with Sasori, I don't know what I'm choosing, but it'll be different." His mind stated he continued eating, leaving all the guys disappointed.

"Tobi knows what Tobi's getting for Takisha-chan. Tobi's getting Takisha-chan bunny footie pajamas." Tobi announced this in the same whisper as the others. To Tobi's delight Dediara, Hidan, Kakuzu and Kisame errupted into hysterical laughter.

Unable to stand it anymore Takisha spun on them yelling," Alright, I've had enough! Tell me what the hell you're all whispering about or else you get black eggs and bacon!"

Cutting off their laughter the guys all fell silent, they never expected the secret to last throughout the morning, but it did last longer than they'd initially guessed. Exchanging looks with each other they silently nominated Deidara to tell, sighing he explained," It's the rest of your initiation, un."

"The rest? I thought the dishes was my initiation." Takisha challenged, her stomach getting ready to throw back the tea she'd drank out of nerves.

"We realized that you got off too easy with just that compared to the other two, un. So we decided yesterday that for the rest of your initiatin you have to wear an outfit each one of us picks out. And you have to wear them in the order we've decided. In example, today is my day, un. So you have to wear the outfit I choose today in the market, un." Deidara explained all this like a professional teacher, an evident sign that he'd spent too much time as a teacher back in the other dimension.

Having gotten the information she wanted she turned back to the stove, heavy gloom line swamped her head, showing what she thought about this new developement she got to look forward to. Jenna and Kenzie were beside themselves laughing and choking on their oatmeal, they felt so much better knowing for sure it wasn't them that had to go through clothing hell. Clearing her throat of oatmeal Kenzie snickered," Hey Takisha, you know where you're going to store all these pretty clothes?"

"Like hell I'm keeping them! After I've worn them for the day, they meet Mr. Fire or Mrs. Scissors!" Takisha roared furiously while waving her egg covered spatula.

The room went silent for maybe five seconds, then in one big roar of voices saying the same thing," YOU'RE KEEPING THEM!!!" Takisha had to cover her ears to prevent her ear drums from breaking. Kenzie snickered at how successful that plan turned out.

" 'Kay, less talking, more eating! I wanna get ths show on the road before lunch. Oh, and Kakuzu, you need to give the girls their allowance." Konan chirped, popping into the kitchen in a puff of smoke.

Kenzie and Kakuzu chorused at the same time (only Kenzie sounded happier than Kakuzu)" Allowance? Since when did we/they get an allowance?"

Making herself a cup of tea Konan replied with her back to them," Pein-sama said they should get a monthly allowance until they earn their own money from missions. They get 25 each."

"25?!?! That's bullshit!" Kakuzu raged, standing up from his chair and nearly knocking over the table. Even though he didn't knock over the table he did knock over the remainder of Jenna's oatmeal. (Kenzie finished eating hers already.)

Glaring Kakuzu Jenna silently got up and left for the lake (the oatmeal had fallen into Jenna's lap.) to clean up. Kenzie snickered," This morning has to be the best one since we got here." In her head she added on , 'And it's just getting better.' Itachi had gotten up from the table and silently followed after Jenna.

Konan sipped at her tea calmly, she waited for Kakuzu to sit back down before continuing," Those are Leader's orders, if you go against what he says you get the punishment equal to the order you disobeyed. Meaning 75 dollars worth of chores, bet that'll be oodles of fun." Kakuzu swore in his head that he'd be happier than any sugar high child when Konan died.

Gritting his teeth he reached into his pocket and pulled out a fat black wallet with a key lock on the clasp. **(: WTF? J: He made it himself, and it is imbued with DNA detection chakra. So if anyone but him puts their hands on the wallet, they just get zapped. K:...God damn. J: Ya, he knows your type Kenzie. K: Grrr.) **Digging out 75 dollars he slapped it down on the table, that character denying action made he up and left the table. Leaving the kitchen he said," I've lost my appetite." Takisha shrugged; she'd feed the shark the left overs. **(T: How else do you befriend a shark so he doesn't eat you the next time you go swimming?)**

Not but a second after Kuzu left did Itachi walk back in, only he wasn't wearing his cloak. A few eyebrows raised; at the same time mouths went askew with restraint laughter. Takisha was one of the eyebrow people, so she was brave enough to ask," Did something happen to your cloak Itachi?"

"Hn...No, I let Jenna borrow it until she gets her own shirt. Her other one didn't take to well to the lake water...And the shark eating it." Itachi replied placidly while sipping his tea inbetween his sentences. That information just killed Kisame, Kenzie, Hidan and Takisha. Konan on the other hands slapped her forehead in embarrassment just thinking about what had happened, and Deidara blushed. **(K: He's having dirty thoughts about whatJenna got underneath the cloak. J: I don't have ANYTHING under the ...... Oh, he is so dead! "Goes back to the lake to grab the shark to throw at Deidara.")**

"Ya, you just laugh it up now. But I'll be the one laughing after I've butchered all your clothes!" Jenna whined coming back into the kitchen and sitting down beside Kenzie.

The guys' mouths turned up at the corner to snicker while Takisha and Kenzie thought, ' She doesn't have the guts to do it, and they all know it.' Standing straight Konan asked the girls," You all done eating, or do I need to shove it down your throats?" Kenzie help up her empty bowl, Jenna just gave her a look and Takisha put her last piece of bacon in her mouth.

Smiling in content Konan marched out of the room cheering," Let's get going, the boys'll catch up after they're done making themselves pretty." Konan didn't bother to keep herself from laughing like Kenzie, Takisha and Jenna. And the guys didn't bother to yell back, **(J: 'Cause deep down inside, they know she spoke the truth.)**

**- On the road -**

"Nnnah! I love getting out of that stuffy cave. Don't you agree?" Konan asked leisurely, stretching out her arms above her head.

Kenzie nodded in understandment, she was the type of person that got claustrophobic from staying in a room or building for too long. Takisha shrugged saying," The weather's nice so I'll agree for today."

"I'm just happy to be away from the guys, I can only imagine how bad this walk would have gone. I mean, Halloween was literal hell!" Jenna spazzed, her hands on her face to show how much stress she felt just thinking about it.

"Blah, I don't even want to remember how much candy I DIDN'T get that night! Not only that, but I ended up losing most of it to Kakuzu for bus fee!! Argh, now I'm all pumped up to bash one of their faces in." Takisha roared, stomping over to a tree and punching it...Only to hurt her hand. Kenzie and Konan shook their heads, Jenna just snickered a little then went back to make sure Takisha hadn't busted any bones.

Turning in circles Kenzie finally remembered something she'd been meaning to ask for a while, tugging on Konan's civilian shirt sleeve she asked," So, what area are we in right now anyways?"

"I can't give you our exact location, but I can tell you that we're right inbetween the village hidden in the leaves and the village hidden in the waterfall." Konan replied unhesitantlym showing that she'd been expecting the question sooner or later.

Given this information Kenzie tried to picture the map of the Naruto world she'd seen in a mange or two. The image she got showed that they could be _anywhere_. Blowing her bangs out of her face in exasperation and slouching a little she muttered," Thanks, it was really nice of you to be honest with me." Konan smiled with her tongue sticking out, it was her uncaring way of saying, 'no problem.'

Takisha came up beside them flexing her fingers, not looking at either of them she informed them both," The pretty boys caught up, and Jenna's playing tag with Tobi in the woods. Ow. I think a bone's out of place...OW! Never mind, it's fine now."

"Good, 'cause we wouldn't have paid to get it looked at." Kakuzu stated, giving Takisha the smallest (but still strong) push. So she still ended up doing a face plant, the guys just walked around her body and kept going, uncaring that they were leaving her behind. Kenzie didn't even stop to help her, that made her cry the most. **(T: So unloved, no one wants me! "Covered by gloom lines in the infamous Uchiha corner." J:...Takisha, it's not that we don't love you. We just don't want you to be a softie and make things harder when you need to be independant. K: Preaches the person who needs to be the toughest out of us all. J: "Glare" T:....I guess that makes sense. K: Good. Now get out of the Uchiha corner and leave it open for Itachi. "A kunai comes out of no where and just barely misses Kenzie's face." J: "Fighting back snickers." I think Itachi heard you. T: "Coughs to cover a laugh." You think? "Looks at Kenzie's face and cracks up." K:0.o)**

Kenzie glanced behind her to make sure Takisha was getting up, but all she saw was a mass of black. Looking up (and putting the slightest kink in her neck) she found Kisame looking back down at her with a raised eyebrow, raising her own eyebrow she asked, "What?"

"Nothing, just wondering why the hell your hair hasn't changed. I know for a fact you didn't brush your hair." Kisame mindlessly responded flicking Kenzie's nose.

Rubbing her nose Kenzie glared, said absolutely nothing and turned her back to him. Her reasoning was that maybe it'll annoy him more if she ignored him...It worked. She felt a swift but hard tug on her hair, turning back around she fumed," What was that for?"

"For ignoring me, I want to know why your hair stays like that... It's not natural." Kisame was determined to know, he'd resort to extreme violence if he had to.

Giving him the cold shoulder again by turning her back to him she still replied," It's natural for me. What's not natural is your hair. Hair doesn't make itself into a poofy point thing." She made motions with her hands to emphazise the 'poof' part. Some of the guys were listening in on this conversation, so of course they snickered at the poofy remark.

Kisame actually glanced up at his hair to see what she was talking about, unable to see he crossed his arms and grumped," I have no idea what you're talking about. Now shut up and keep walking or I'll step on you." In translation. 'He didn't want to talk about this subject anymore because it was just leading to more embarrassment.' Kenzie gladly dropped the conversation; she knew she'd won this one.

**- In the Woods -**

"Pheew. Okay Tobi, I give up. You win, no more tag. I can't run anymore. We need to catch up to the others." Jenna wheezed supporting herself against a tree. She hadn't been surprised when Tobi turned out to be uncatchable, but she did have hopes that Tobi would have slowed down for her.

Tobi poofed himself beside Jenna, only he was standing on the tree...side ways. His head tilted he asked," Are you sure you want to stop playing?"

Nodding she asked him," Can you pretty please teleport us to the others?" The thing with Tobi is, you ask he might refuse. You ask really nicely, he never refuses. The others haven't figured that out yet.

Getting off the tree Tobi scooped Jenna up and sat her on his shoulders. In a voice an octave deeper than his usual quirky one he warned," Better hold on, I'd get in a lot of trouble if I lost you." Not needing a second warning Jenna made a death grip around Tobi's head, though the voice he'd used creeped her out very much. ' I'm thnking Kenzie and Takisha need to be informed of this. Madara seems to be poking his evil little head out from behind his mask.'

'WHOOSH!'

The air rushed past her head, and at the last second she let go. Because of that her trajectory was off and instead of landing back on the with Tobi; she appeared right above Takisha and landed (painfully) on top of her. Groaning Jenna muttered," Note to self, hold on tighter next time."

"There won't be a next time if you don't get off me!" Takisha growled, wiggiling and struggling to get out from under Jenna.

Laughing nervously Jenna jumped up and backed away from the fuming Takisha. Takisha in turn glared daggers of hell bent metal, **(J: Next to a mangekyo glare that's the worst kind of glare to get.) **in a cold merciless voice Takisha swore," You can starve for the next two days." Jenna felt the most bone chilling shiver go donw her spine; Takisha would make sure Jenna starved for the next two days.

"Ouch, harsh much?Does she really need to suffer for two days?" Kenzie asked, having come back to see why Jenna was looking ready to move into the Uchiha corner.

Her arms crossed Takisha firmly replied," Yes. She knew perfectly well that we had to stick together and she deliberately went off to play with Tobi. Not only that, but had she landed any harder and I could have really hurt myself. And I don't cook in pain. Imagne how much hell the guys would have dealt had that happened." They all imagined it. Kenzie laughed, Jenna thanked Saint Jimmy for the light fall and Takisha felt even more justified about her decision.

"HEY! You three airheads coming or not?! We'll more than happily leave you behind and choose your clothes for you!" Hidan yelled back to them from ten feet away and still retreating.

Positive that nightmare would become reality the girls dashed off yelling," WE'RE COMING!!!"

**- 20 More minutes later in the nearest town -**

"WHOOOOAAA." The girls could only boggle their eyes at the sight before them. Youkai Town was massive, loud, colourful and down right incredible to them. Little hick town Port Lambton had nothing on this sprawling conjuction of civilization.

The Akatsuki group rolled their eyes, it was sad what some people considered impressive. Tired of waiting for them to take it all in Sasori muttered," Can you three stop drooling and get moving. Or do you need help?" The girls needn't turn around to look to know that Sasori had wiggled his fingers in extra threat. **(J: He enjoys watching us squirm like worms. Sas: Indeed I do. T: Gwah! "Jumps back and hides behind Kenzie." Where'd he come from? K: Where do they all come from? T: Okay, point made. "Hits Kenzie in the stomach" I swear I didn't do that!! K: "Kicks Takisha in the shin." I didn't do that!! T,K: SASORI!! Sas: You were ignoring me. J: "Dying of laughter in the background." Sas: "Makes Takisha and Kenzie slap each other" T,K: WE DIDN'T IGNORE YOU THAT TIME!! Sas: That was out of boredom. And this is out of annoyance. "Makes Takisha and Kenzie chase after Jenna with magically materialized crowbars" Sas: I love my jutsu "Smiles")**

"We're going, we're going. No need to waste chakra." Takisha said with her hands up, her feet moving forward faster than necessary. Twenty steps ahead of the others she stopped, turned around and asked," Where are we going anyway?"

Konan gave her a crooked smile and pointed to a convienant looking store that was open. (All the clothes and items are out in the open instead of them being inside.) Approaching the store the girls started eyeing up the things they liked, when they actually reached the store the guys were surprised by the choices the girls made. Kenzie went straight for a pair of torn up jeans and a purple shirt with a happy fish on it. Takisha chose a dangerously low cut pink shirt and a black skirt that ended a bit above the knees. Jenna snatched up a pair of green cargo shorts and a blinding lime green muscle shirt. The best part about all these choices was that they were located in the laf price rack.

Shaking her head Konan placed her hands on her hips and said firmly," You three don't care much about the opinions of others, do you?"

"Why should we?" They chorused in unison. Moving onto their next selection of clothing they didn't notice that the guys had disappeared to find a more...Exclusive store. **(J: Remember what they were talking about at the table? T: Oh shit, I forgot. I'm doomed, aren't I? J: Most definitely.)**

Not about to let the girls uncaring attitude fly over her head Konan went straight for the lingerie section. Takisha saw her the second she help up three bras, laing she stuttered," K-Konan. W-what are you doing with those?"

"I'm buying them, what else." The tone she used to answer clearly said afterward, ' I'm buying, you're wearing.' Jenna and Kenzie caught on to what was happening and did the same thing as Takisha : Fear for their clothes lives.

Knowing they were watching her, Konan left the bra section and moved over to the underwear. The look on the girl's faces were priceless. (It's the infamous D8) It took Takisha a second to realize it was too quiet, scanning the store layout she vocally noted," The guys are gone...Thank god."

" Way to jinx us, they're coming back." Jenna pointed to the mob of guys heading back towards them.

Kenzie acted quick, running over to Konan she grabbed the unmentionables from her hand and stashed them inside her pants. (The ones she was buying, not wearing.) Jenna and Takisha cried tears of graditude. Facing them she mouthed, "You owe me." They just nodded while Konan put a very sneaky smile on her face, she wasn't going to let the girls get away scott free.

When the guys reached them Takisha couldn't help bu notice that each of them had a bag, and the bag's name made everything worse. The store they went to was called, 'Susuki's Sexy Styles.' Instinct kicking in she stepped back towards a rack of clothes she intended to hide in. Only the guys were one step ahead, Deidara poofed up behind her and dragged her back to the changing booths. The imagination reeled to what she'd come back wearing. The sly smirk a notch wider Konan pointed to Kenzie and innocently asked," Kenzie, are you trying to steal those bras and underwear? Hiding them in the pants won't work if you are."

"WHAT?! You bitch!" Kenzie hugged the pants to herself tighter, the guys had a rather chilling gleam in their eyes.

In a blink Hidan was in front of her with the bras and underwear in his hands. Turning them this way and that he babbled," Very nice. I'm guessing this one is yours. Freckles. And for today, the Fairy."

"Konan picked those out. And I don't plan on wearing them." Jenna quickly piped up, not really thinking about what she was saying.

Konan zipped up into Jenna's face, looming over her she made herself very cear," You'll wear the clothes I buy for you, if I have to dress you myself I will."

"You won't have to do that, un. I bet Itachi would do it without being asked, un....Ow! You bastard! You know I'm telling the truth, un! Agh! Stop throwing shit at me, un!" Deidarea was currently holding his hands to his head where Itachi had pegged him with two random rocks he'd gotten out of no where.

Her arms crossed in fury Jenna muttered angrily," I'll dress myself. Neither Konan or Itachi need assist me. Now shut up about it....Hey where's Takisha?" That made Deidara smile.

Running back to the changing booth Deidara grabbed hold of something white and sparkly. Pulling hard on it he revealed Takisha in a black sequened corset, short red poofy skirt and wings attached to her back. Tears streamed from her eyes in embarrassment while the guys laughed and whistled. Jenna and Kenzie hugged her in comfort while trying to stiffle their snickers. Takisha sniffed and asked," Why are you holding back, you can laugh. I know I look horrible." Permission given they broke out into harder laughter than the guys.

Once they calmed down Takisha asked quietly," Wanna help me find a massive coat to hide this under?"

"We could, but a blanket would work better since we can use it for our bed after." Jenna suggested instead, Kenzie was already thinking of the perfect blanket. Takisha nodded, that idea did seem more reasonable.

"Rrr! Covering the outfit is not allowed un. You have to wear it open for everyone to admire, un." Deidara yelled right in their faces after he'd read their lips.

Shoving him back Kenzie stated," If that was part of the initiation you should have included that rule when you explained it this morning. So she's allowed to cover up. Nyah!" She finished the sentence by sticking her tongue out. Deidara out did her and stuck out all three tongues. **(J: I know he has four tongues 'cause of the mouth on his chest but this works better.)**

Getting impatient Kakuzu asked," Are we done blowing MY money yet?"

"Nope. There's still one more thing they need. You guys probably need them too, but your boxers would work fine." Konan babbled aimlessly taking hold of Jenna and Takisha and dragging them off. **(J: Kakuzu ended up paying for the clothes we picked out, he's going to take our allowance back in repayment.)**

Jenna saw where they were being dragged to first and yelped," Takisha! Break free! Save yourself, you've suffered enough today!"

Takisha raised an eyebrow at this in confusion. Looking in the same direction that Jenna had looked she caught on and started struggling. Kenzie had been walking behind the three of them so she didn't know what they were flipping out about. Peering around them she saw their designated destination and stopped walking. Spinning around she walked robotically in the other direction. Kisame grabbed hold of her shirt as they passed each other and hauled her back towards the store. The swimsuit store that is.


	7. The Boys' Choice

**J: Weeelll, lookie at this, this update was much faster than the others, but it wasn't that long PLUS I had a crapload of free time...So....Yayz!**

**K: "Searching"**

**T: ??? Kenzie, what on earth are you looking for?**

**K: "Ignores"**

**J: Ooooh, I think I know :3**

**T: What? Tell me!**

**Haku: Um, hello?**

**K: 8D "Tackle glomps"**

**T: Ooooh....."Shakeshead"**

**J: Our faithful reviewer since the first series has requested Haku to disclaim.**

**Haku: "Attempting to pry Kenzie off." I would like to disclaim, but I cannot breathe very well with....Kenzie?....Clinging to me so tightly.**

**Zabuza : "Stomps in out of nowhere and pries Kenzie off."**

**K: ....."Sparkling eyes of admiration, glomps Zabuza"**

**J: Hehe, Haku and Zabuza are a package deal.**

**T:............-.-'**

**Haku : "Nods appreciatively to his master" Jenna does not own any of the Akatsuki members or places named, and the girls own themselves. "Attempts to leave, only to be tackled again by Kenzie"**

**J,T: "Sigh"**

**

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**

**Chapter Six - The Boys' Choice**

The cashier working at 'Rit-Chan's Swimwear' had a rather quiet morning, not many costumers, but enough that she wasn't bored. Her day got a whole lot interesting when a group of men and four females (three being dragged)came in

Konan smiled at the surprised cashier and asked sweetly," Where might I find the woman's section?" The cashier pointed a finger in the direction of the bikinis and one pieces for women. Giving a friendly wave of thanks Konan continued the dragging. The guys followed after, the big blue man dragging another girl with him. When the blonde pony tailed man passed she could have sworn he was a girl at first glance. **(J: "Running away from Deidara on massive clay bird." T,K: "Dying on floor laughing.")**

Wiggling to get free from Konan's grasp Jenna whined," C'mon Konan. What will we need bathing suits for?! We're not swimming in the shark infested lake."

" Trust me, you'll need them for something other than swimming in the lake." Konan's voice foretold of something even **worse. (J: If you tell me what literary device I just used there then I'll slip you into the next chapter and let you meet the Akatsuki member of your choice. K:….Where the hell did that come from? T: English class? J: English class :D K: -.-" )**

Takisha looked up at Konan with wide puppy dog eyes, her bottom lip quivering she asked pleadingly," Please spare me. I've already gone through hell once today. And I'll be going through this hell ALL week."

"Suck it up Princess, you'll be going through a lot worse then wardrobe hell once you starts on missions. For now, you can live through this one. Okay boys, you're picking for the girls this time. But nothing too skimpy, they're trying them on here after all." Konan then chucked Jenna and Takisha into changing rooms. Kisame threw Kenzie into the last available one.

Using ninja speed Konan shut and sealed their stall doors with charka **(J: Don't ask how, but she did.) **Various banging of fists against the stall doors accompanied by, "KOOOONNAAANN!!!" The guys had already set out to decide on bathing suits.

Hidan and Deidara were the first to return with options. Throwing them into Takisha's stall they yelled in union," Try mine on first! (un)"

Takisha's response was," How about I try NEITHER on first!" That earned a chorused, "NOW!" A squeak and ruffling of fabric ensued.

A second later Takisha stepped out in a one piece that looked like it could be turned into a two pice if the strings at the side were untied. It was a simple black coloured suit with a red flower on the front and back. Glaring with a small blush Takisha fumed," I didn't know who's was who's. Who chose this one?"

" I did, and I think it suits you fine. It would look even better if you were covered in blood though." Hidan's eyes glazed over slightly. Takisha assumed he was picturing the image he just spoke of. Sticking her tongue out she went back into the stall, unaware that Konan had just taken a picture with her newly…'bought'…disposable camera.

More fabric rustling ensued and Takisha came back out wearing a one piece that was blue and sported a massive purple bow at the back while the front had a cut out of a diamond that revealed her belly button. Giving Deidara a confused look she asked," I don't mind this one, but why the hell did you pick it?"

" 'Cause I considered it a work of art, un! Plus I can easily take it off you as well. All I need do is pull the tie around your neck, un. Hehehehe." Deidara earned a look that clearly stated , ' You just lost food for a week you perverted jack ass.' Marching back into her stall she finally heard the 'click' of Konan's camera, but just brushed it off.

Itachi, Sasori and Zetsu had both agreed on two options for Jenna. Throwing them into her stall they heard her mutter, " Oh, this is just hilarious."

A second later she stepped out in a green two piece that sported black and red hearts all over it. Crossing her arms she asked," Did you choose this 'cause it has all three of your hair colours?"

In unison they replied monotonely," No."

"Liars…Hm? Konan, did you just take a picture?" Eyes squinting in accusation Jenna gave Konan a deterring look. Konan simply showed Jenna her empty hands with an innocent smile. Unsatisfied Jenna slipped back into her stall.

The guys waited patiently for her vocal response to the next swimsuit, they didn't have to wait long, " WHAT THE FUCKING HELL YOU GUYS?!"

She stepped out of the stall wearing a one piece that was black, had a red heart in the middle and around the heart it said," I LOVE KINKY HAREMS!"

Zetsu smiled crookedly on the black side, Sasori smiled wickedly, and Itachi just bluntly said," We know it's the truth." That sent Jenna into a stomping rampage back into her stall.

"Here Kenzie-chan! I pickedout a pretty bathing suit for you." Tobi chirped happily, throwing a rainbow one piece into Kenzie's stall.

Kenzie was silent for a moment before saying kind of unimpressed," Thank you Tobi. Um, I'd rather not come out though."

"That's okay! Tobi can see through your stall door. It looks pretty on you Kenzie-chan!" Tobi lied ingeniously. He may have the personality of a five year old, but his intellect can be leveled at a wise old man. **(J: Which he actually is. )**

Kenzie kicked open her stall and demanded," Since when can you use transparency jutsu?!"

"Since…Never. And you do look pretty in your swimsuit Kenzie-chan!" Tobi clapped his hands together joyously while Kisame and Kakuzu approached carrying their own swim suits of choice. Seeing Kenzie in all her rainbow glory they broke out in a bout of loud laughter. Shooting them the finger she went back into the stall.

Tobi tapped his chin in thought and concluded that Takisha and Jenna should have pretty swimsuits like Kenzie's too. Skipping back to the wrack he'd found the rainbow one in he thought happily,' I'm sure Takisha-chan and Jenna-chan will love their swimsuits just as much as Kenzie-chan.' Once Kisame and Kakuzu calmed down they called to Kenzie in union, " Hey, Rainbow Princess, we have more pretty suits for you."

"I'm going to kill you both, now give me the fucking swimsuits and leave. You're not allowed to see me wear them." Kenzie firmly informed the two block heads that were snickering at their own jokes.

Tossing his swimsuit in the stall first Kisame yelled back cheerfully," HA! I'd like to see this flimsy stall door stand up to my foot. You come out and show us how it looks or I'll bust the door down early. Either way you'll be showing us something." The sound of Kenzie groaning while smashing her head against the wall was heard after. Kakuzu raised his eyebrows to silently ask, ' You seriously going to do that?' Kisame just smirked back.

A moment after the door opened and Kenzie looked good and ready to kill them both. Only they couldn't take her furious look seriously due to the eye smarting neon blue bikini she was wearing. Deidara stepped over to them, his nose already dripping blood. Seeing this Kenzie huffed and retreated back into the stall grumbling some swear words. Turning to look at each other for opinions the three men agreed that was a very good choice on Kisame's part. Kakuzu leaned towards Deidara and whispered," Make sure to ask Konan for the pictures of her in the rainbow bathing suit. It's a real winner." Deidara nodded, already picturing the image in his head.

Kenzie came out again, just as unhappy as the first time. This time around she was wearing a one piece that was silver with a heart cut out in the middle of her back. All the boys tilted their heads to the side, they silently agreed she looked 'alright' in it. Rolling her eyes Kenzie went back into the stall, before she locked the door she heard Konan whisper," I can't wait to get these developed. The girls will have a hay day trying to get these form me. Tehehehe."

"Hmm, think we can have copies for black mail, un? You never know when you'll need good leverage on an unruly teenager." Deidara asked, devious plots and ideas already molding in his twisted blonde mind.

Booting open her door Kenzie swiftly sniped the camera out of Konan's hands and locked her stall. Letting out a sigh of relief she turned the camera around and opened the film compartment, only to find it empty. Hastily unlocking her stall she yelled," KONAN!" The cunning blue haired witch had already disappeared with the film.

Takisha and Jenna opened their stalls fully dressed and asked in union," What? What's wrong?"

" Konan took pictures of us in our bathing suits when we weren't looking." Gritting her teeth she took off past the already snickering Akatsuki members.

Jenna and Takisha would have chased after Konan but Tobi stood in their way. Holding up neon green and pink bathing suits with a cat and duck on them. Tobi pleaded," Please try on Tobi's pretty bathing suits. PLEEEAAASE!"

Exchanging a nervous look with each other the girls attempted to turn down the suits nicely, however Itachi and Hidan wouldn't allow it. Yanking them back into the stalls (much to their dismay) Hidan said threateningly," Of course you'll try on the pretty bathing suit **won't you**?" The under tone to his voice promised much pain if they refused.

Pasting a forced smile on they shut the stall doors and locked them, Tobi happily handed the bathing suits to Itachi so he could throw them to the girls. A minute or so passed before both Jenna and Takisha grumbled," I am NOT coming out!!" Even with his mask over his face Sasori could tell Tobi was depressed.

Rolling his eyes Sasori jumped above the stalls and cast his chakra strings, Takisha almost threw her shoe at him before she remembered that A) She couldn't control her own actions and B) Sasori could hurt her…A lot. Landing lightly between the two stalls he made the girls unlock and open their stall doors. The instant reaction from the guys was…."BWAHAHAHA!!!" Three of them keeled over onto the floor while the rest nearly doubled over with tears in their eyes. (Of course not Mr. Anal though "pointing to Itachi")

Gritting their teeth together Takisha and Jenna marched back into the stalls, they only repressed their raging fury so not to upset Tobi. He'd been clapping his hands and jumping up and down in happiness. If they'd blown up at the guys he'd have known they didn't like the swimsuits. They liked Tobi too much to upset him. **( T,J: We're suckers for keeping him happy. K: "Shakeshead" Tob: Hi Kenzie-chan! K: 8D "Glomps" J,T: "Shakeshead")**

At the same time Jenna and Takisha came back out Kenzie came back into the store. Desperate for some peace of mind Jenna asked," Did you get the film back?"

Hanging her head in depression she moaned in emotional agony," Noooooo. She got it to a developer before I could reach her. AND she's paid him some serious cash to make sure he hands the pictures back to her, and her only." The gloom caught on in a second after hearing that. Takisha cried tears for a miracle of the pictures spontaneously combusting and Jenna started thinking of the different places she could hide in the lair.

Shaking their heads at the girls patheticness Deidara and Hidan lugged off the motionless bodies while Itachi, Sasori and Kisame paid for the swim suits. It wasn't that they were expensive, they just wanted something for leaverage in the not so distant future. Shopping purchases in hand the group of evil ninjas set off to the lair.


	8. Room Arrangements

**J: Well "scuffs shoe on the ground" I'm SO sorry I took....MONTHS, to update. I was just in this writer's slump where I didn't want to write OR type. Please forgive meeee! **

**K:....Stop groveling like an idiot Jenna.**

**T: Yes, it's not very....nice, to watch.**

**J: Whatever. xP Anyways, since it;s been a while I'm not going to have anyone disclaim, but I will tell you that Hatsuharusgirl (sorry on the spelling too lazy to look up the proper spelling) was the first to answer my english question. It was indeed foreshadowing. I'll try and put another question in a chapter for one of you guys to get another shot at making a random appearance. Oh, and I hope you don't mind Hatsuharusgirl, but I used your real name for your appearance. Anyhoodles, enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Seven - Room Arrangements**

**(J: Time skipping is fun. Especially if you have no idea what to write for the rest of one day. So now it's the day after shopping day. T:....0.e K: What's your problem? T: I have to wear ****another**** repulsive fantasy out fit, **_**THAT'S**_** MY PROBLEM! "Yanking on hair." K: Ooooh, right....Hahahaha. J: Want me to mentally prepare you and tell you who's day it is? T: Please? J: It's "whispers" T: Well....At least I know his mind isn't as twisted as the others. J: See I'm nice...Sometimes. "Pats Takisha on back" T: "Sighs" Okay. Time to go to hell.)**

As the boys have come to understand, Jenna and Takisha were early birds (in that order as well) while Kenzie was more of the average teenager. Another thing they've come to accept is that Jenna goes straight to the library **(J:Which I forgot to include in the map of the lair.) **Takisha went straight to the kitchen, and Kenzie went straight to the living room couch. So on a day where they needed to surprise them, it came in handy that they knew where to find the girls.

7:00 am

Jenna lounged back in her designated reading chair, for the past two days she'd been reading a book called 'Cresent Moon Blades.' She didn't know that though since the front covering was written in Japanese, oddly enough the inside content was english. It was basically about a kunoichi powning all the ninjas that tried to marry her. It was one of those books that only a major distraction could snap her out of, a perfect example would be Itachi's shadow suddenly looming over her.

Closing the book and holding perfectly still Jenna asked without looking back," Can I help you?"

"If you don't give me any hassle and go outside the lair by yourself, that would help me. But I wouldn't mind some sad amusement this morning." Itachi's voice almost, ALMOST, had a laughing tone to it.

' He must be in a good mood. Best not to ruin it.' "Alright I'm going. Can you tell me **why** I'm leaving my reading chair to sit outside on the horribly lumpy ground?" Jenna asked, careful not to put an edge to her voice. Getting out of the chair she turned to face Itachi, who thankfully didn't have his sharigan activated. Yet he still looked down at her in such a way that she got goosebumps down her back.

Itachi stared for a minute or two, then turned his back on her and walked out the door. That was his silent way of telling Jenna, 'No. He wasn't going to explain anything to her.' Her mouth puckered she silently followed and fumed after him. If they passed anyone on the way to the exit she'd ask them.

**7:05 am**

Takisha smiled proudly at the massive stack of pancakes she'd made in record time. What made her smile even bigger was the happy thought that she didn't have to do the dishes today, Konan had promised Takisha that her dish initiation wouldn't be put into effect until EVERYTHING had been settled. Clapping her hands to rid them of any left over flour she sighed contently. Only to jump in surprise the second after, Deidara had snuck up behind her and poked her on both sides. A hand over her heart she yelled," What the hell was that for Deidara?!"

"Heh, just wanted to have some fun this morning. But listen, do me a favor and go outside. Jenna should be out there already, so don't worry about being a loner, un. And I swear this isn't a joke, un."

A suspicious eyebrow raised Takisha asked skeptically," Why should I trust you of all people Deidara? Especially since you were the one that came up with that stupid outfit initiation. I'll go outside, when I'm ready to go outside. Oh and you don't get food this morning." Takisha emphasized on most of the things she said while waving her spatula around.

Deidara blew his bangs up in a sigh, crossing his arms he told Takisha calmly," Listen, you need to get your butt outside now by yourself, or I'll haul you out, un. So what's it going to be, un?"

Takisha crossed her own arms and planted her feet firmly on the floor, not even blinking she asked," You going to tell me why I'm going outside?"

"No, un. We're not allowed to tell you, Leader-sama's orders." Deidara replied, his body moving subtly. Takisha set her jaw and turned back to the stove. Deidara sprung at that same second, grabbing her up and throwing her over his shoulder he grumbled," Why does it always have to be you that gives me the most trouble, un?"

Takisha didn't say anything back in reply, she simply yanked on Deidara's pony tail alot in a half hearted attempt to make him let go of her. Didn't work very well, but she did make his ponytail all poofy. That made up for her pancakes being left unattended.

**7:15 am**

Kenzie lay cocooned in the comforter, blissfully dreaming of being back home where deranged S-rank ninja's didn't beat on her. Thinking about them beating on her caused her to alter so Kisame was stomping on her back. It hurt. 'Wait...It hurts? Dreams don't hurt.' Cracking an eye open she groaned, Kisame actually was stomping on her back. Curling up tighter in the blankets she growled," Leave me alooone."

"Oh good you're alive, and here I thought waking you up was a lost cause. Now that you're conscious, get your butt outside. You can take the blanket and pillow with you if you're desperate enough to sleep on the ground." Kisame said roughly, he wasn't too happy to be waking up so early. Especially since he was woken up to do nothing but wake someone else up and kick them outside.

Kenzie stuck her hand out from beneath the blanket and waved Kisame away, Kisame responded by stomping on her back again...Only harder. **(J: Just so you know he's bare foot, so it's not hurting her as much as it could. It also helps that she's wrapped up in a rather poofy comforter.) **Groaning louder she tried to press herself against the cave wall, it failed and Kisame continued to stomp on her...Until he needed to switch feet. When her back couldn't take any more she wailed," OK! I'll get up! But you owe me a day free of beathings!" Sitting up with the blanket wrapped around her she shuffled off the bed and moved very slowly (hunched over) out the door.

Kisame sighed and flopped onto the bed (it was still warm) staring up at the dull ceiling he muttered," Ungrateful girl. She'll be impossible to wake up once she's relocated."

**- Outside at the entrance -**

"You made pancakes? And left them INSIDE, instead of bringing them OUTSIDE where we can eat them and make the guys starve.....WHAT WERE YOU THINKING WOMAN?!?!!?" Jenna's stomach was growling almost as loudly as she was yelling.

Kenzie's stomach was silent, she usually didn't feel hungry until noonish. The guys thought that was weird, but they don't question anything about the girl's anymore. Last time someone asked one of the girls about something they got an answer they didn't want. **(J: Deidara did the asking, and Takisha did the answering. K: What did he ask? T: He wanted to know what a bloody hammer was. He heard it from Hidan, who heard it from me, and I heard it from Jenna, who heard it from her brother. K: And what was his reaction to the answer? T: It was a mix between repulsed and disgusted. It was quite hilairious actually. Dei: What was quite hilarious, un? T: Bloody hammer Dei: " Turns a nasty shade of green and looks ready to puke." T: THAT'S quite hilarious. J,K: " Laughing and moving away from Deidara." Dei: You three are real sick minded, un. That's just nasty, un! T,J,K: "Crossing fingers behind their back that he'll think they're too nasty for him to like." Dei: "Beams a big smile" That makes your even more interesting, un. I can only imagine how your mind can be used in bed, un. "Wiggles eyebrows suggestively." J,TK: "Falls to the ground exasperated.")**

Takisha's mouth kept it's scrunched appearance while muttering back," You don't think I didn't think about that. I would have grabbed them if Deidara didn't grab me first. Now stop whining and stop talking about food. I'm hungry too."

"HI Takisha-chan, Jenna-chan, and Kenzie-chan! How are you this morning?" Tobi asked chirply, a plate of pancakes in his hands. At the sight of the pancakes Takisha's and Jenna's stomachs growled loudly. Kenzie's mouth filled with drool from the aroma of the pancakes.

Tobi got a bunch of groans and growls for a reply, confused he asked," Are you sick? What's wrong?"

"Huuuungrrry." Takisha moaned, her body collapsed and unmoving on the thankfully dry dirty ground. Jenna was saved from feeling creepy crawlers on her skin by leaning against the three. Kenzie had done them both one better and made herself comfortable on a massive tree branch. After the climb up to the branch she didn't have much energy to do much else.

Tobi glanced at his pancakes then at the girls, and came up with the best course of action. In not even a millasecond he inhaled the pancakes, and not once did they catch a look at his face. Letting out a good sized burp of satisfaction he pat his stomach and smiled (they just knew he was smiling) at them. Groaning a little bit louder Takisha asked," Tobi, did you even _taste_ the pancakes?"

"Yes I did Takisha-chan, and they were very good. Tobi's surprised you're not happy. Tobi would be very happy if he was getting a new room." Tobi cooed happily, his plate spinning on his index finger expertly.

That got the girl's unhungered attention. Scurrying up to Tobi Jenna asked with sparkling eyes," What? What about new rooms?"

"I remember now. Last week Pein had said we'd be clothes shopping and getting our room arrangements worked out this week....But why did they kick us out if all they're doing is setting up our rooms?" Takisha inquired while tapping her chin. Kenzie and Jenna pondered the same thing. Usually room arranging didn't require the removal of people.

Tobi tossed his plate up into the air and caught it again. Keeping it standing up on his finger he answered for them carelessly," Deidara-sempai has to blow up the cave to make more rooms, and everyone decided you'd be unsmart and get exploded. So they're keeping you outside until they're done." Tobi put the plate normally in his hand and walked off, perfectly aware of how annoyed he'd just made the girls. That had been his intention actually.

Waiting until their minds got straight the girls went into a ranting rampage with many pretty colourful words. Their backs set they stomped back into the cave...Only to be blown back out by a gust of air, accompanied by a massive 'BOOM!' (They could have sworn they heard Deidara laughing like a maniac too.) Jenna's hair was a frizzy poofy mess, Takisha managed to accumilate a mask of soot, and Kenzie's blanket was hung on the top of the tree. Combing her fingers through her hair Jenna asked," I wonder how big a room that made."

"Should we try to go back in?" Takisha asked, wiping off the black grit on her face. **(T: I don't care if I get it all over my shirt. I'm not the one that has to wash clothes this week. K: Ya, I am. "Grump" T: Tehehe.)**

Kenzie thought about it for a second and came up with a clever scheme, " They have to make three rooms right? We know they want that one room back for their trash. So after the next 'BOOM' we run for it."

"I'll go with that. You?" Jenna asked Takisha, already knowing what the answer was.

Takisha gave a curt nod saying," Sounds good to me, but it's going to hurt like a bitch if we don't get to them in time and we get thrown against a wall or something." Kenzie hadn't thought about the time limit they had.

Tapping her chin in thought Kenzie mumbled outloud," Well, if we had some kind of warning we could duck into one of the bedrooms. But we didn't really get anything except a massive blast of air in the face."

"Actually we heard the boom first, then the blast of air. So we can use that, the second we hear the 'BOOM' we run for a bedroom. 'Kay?" Takisha deivsed, Kenzie and Jenna nodding in agreement.

A minute after this decision was made they heard another 'BOOM!' from the cave. Getting into action they bolted into the cave, which to their dismay had filled with smoke. Barely able to see, much less breathe, they unintentionally broke apart. Takisha continued down one hallway, Kenzie went down the other and Jenna went straight into the kitchen.

Kenzie had her sleeve over her mouth, and her eyes were watering from the smoke. Squinting to see she yelled," Can you guys see anything?...Guys? Jenna? Takisha? Oh crap." No point in turning back she ventured onwards to where she thought she heard obnoxious voices.

The smoke started to clear when she reached the voices, which turned out to be Kisame arguing with Kakuzu. "What do you mean you're not buying them beds? Leader-sama said to give them rooms with the necesities. Meaning a bed and dresser. That won't cost you that much compared to how much you have stashed."

"I don't care. I'm not spending over 50 bucks on those sassy mouthed bitches. If Leader wants their rooms to have crap in them, then he can pay for it!" Kakuzu fumed, his arms crossed and his back turned to Kisame.

" 'Cough' Excuse me, but what 'cough' did you just call me?" Kenzie spluttered between coughs. She wasn't really upset about being called 'sassy' in fact that was the first time she'd ever been called sassy. She just wanted to ruffle their already unkempt feathers.

Kisame raised an eyebrow, a thought brewing in his mind of twisted evilness. He's need the perfect moment to put it into effect thought. Kakuzu, almost reading his mind, started towards that perfect moment by asking," I'll call you whatever I want bitch. Now answer my question, what the hell are you doing in here? You were told to stay outside."

"Did you really think I'd actually stay out there?" Kenzie retorted back, making Kakuzu glower at her. **(K: Tehehe J,T: What? K: I can just imagine him having feathers and they're all poofed up. T,J: "Pictures. Dies of laughter alongside Kenzie." Kak: "Glaring with tentacles out and poised to strike them through their hearts." Who's a poofed up bird? T,K,J: 0.e "Runs away while making bird noises." Kak: Your hearts will be mine!!!! "Chases after them.)**

Kisame now had his perfect moment, bending over to meet Kenzie eye to eye he smiled," You know, if Kakuzu doesn't buy you a bed you'll have to share with someone else during the night. And Leader-sama always goes by the volunteer system. Who do you think will volunteer first Kenzie?"

Kenzie's blood went cold in her veins, eyes growing wide she jumped on Kakuzu and yelled in his face," BUY ME A BED!!! I don't care about Jenna or Takisha, JUST BUY MY A FUCKING BED!!!"

Kakuzu pried Kenzie's hands off the sides of her head and dropped her on the floor beside Kisame who was currently dying of laughter. Looming over her he growled," I'll buy you a THING to sleep on, but that's all. Same for the other two. Maybe I'll even be nice and get you used futons. Now get out of my face." Kenzie sighed in relief, flicked Kisame in the head and headed back the way she came, not even remembering why she went in there to begin with.

**- Down the other hallway -**

"Phew, Deidara must have blown up the room on the otherside of the cave...Hm...I seem to have lost Kenzie and Jenna." Takisha muttered to herself outloud.

She'd come to a stop by Deidara and Itachi's rooms, and another room that had no door. Curious she poked her head into the dark hole and saw the outline of Deidara, Sasori and Zetsu. She couldn't see what Deidara was doing since he was bent over whatever it was, but Sasori and Zetsu were muttering something to each other. Too much of a blonde not to clue in to leave she stepped into the hole and asked," Um, what are you guys doing?"

The guys froze in place, Deidara stood up revealing a mass ball of explosive clay. Attached to it was a paper bomb set to blow up the ball in...5 seconds. Acting fast Sasori, Zetsu, and Deidara tackled Takisha to the ground and shielded her with their bodies. After the explosion went off Takisha felt that Sasori had gotten to her first. His hollow wooden body weighed a ton. The weight of the other two didn't help at all either. Slowly they retreated off of Takisha, when she was able to stand up she mumbled," That answers my question I guess. And, um, thanks."

"What the hell are you doing here, un?! You were suppose to stay outside, just for THAT reason, un! Leader-sama would have killed us if you'd gotten blown up!" Deidara yelled at Takisha, making her slightly flinch.

When she was sure he'd finished and gotten his frustration out of his system she held herself straight and calmly informed him," That is exactly the reason why I came in here. To prove you wrong! I won't et blown up! If I do it's because you didn't give good enough warning. Now I'm going to the kitchen, and if there aren't any pancakes left, someone's making more!....OH! And don't think I didn't feel you grab my chest you fucking pervert!" Her mind said Takisha stomped off to the kitchen feeling alot better. That feeling only lasted two seconds when she felt her body start walking towards Sasori's room.

Looking over her shoulder she yelled," What the hell are you doing Sasori?!"

He was walking behind her and all he said to reply was," It's my day."

Takisha's mind took three seconds to process what he meant, when she clicked in tears streamed down her face. In her mind she prayed, ' PLEASE DON'T DRESS ME UP LIKE PINOCHIO!!!' To Sasori she asked in a little squeak," Can I have a clue as to what I'm being forced to wear?"

"No. Besides, it's right in front of you." Sasori pointed to his bed that was never used. When you have an unaging body there wasn't any need to sleep.

Looking where he pointed the tears doubled in strength, hanging her head she moaned miserably," Of all the things to make me wear. You chose that."

"I like girls in frills. Live with it." Sasori stated firmly before shutting the door behind him. Living puppet he may be, a sad excuse of a man that peeps at women,he was not.

Zetsu approached Sasori and asked," What did you buy for her to wear?"

A ghost of a smile on his mouth he replied," A ballerina tutu."

'Knock' 'Knock' Came Takisha's signal that she was done changing. Opening the door he smirked wickedly and simply said, "Nice."

Takisha shuffled out of his room with her clothes in hand, avoiding eye contact she grumbled," I don't know what's more upsetting, your clothing choice or the fact that it fits perfectly."

_"Why wouldn't it fit perfectly? We have your measurments, including the other two._" Zetsu said from his black side.

Her eye twitched for a second before she asked demandingly," How do you have our measurements?!"

Sasori and Zetsu exchanged glances as a flash back went through their minds.

**- Flash Back -**

_**Again Sasori had to question how wasting his chakra in this manner would benefit the Akatsuki in the future.**_

_**It was the day they'd brought the girls through the portal and back at the cave. Instead of letting them rest on the floor in the living room Leader-sama had instructed Sasori to use his chakra strings to make the girls stand still. Sasori didn't question only obeyed, as all the Akatsuki members were taught from day one. With a flick of his wrist the girls sleeping bodies were on their feet standing perfectly straight. Konan got to work instantly with a length of measuring tape. When she was done she gave Sasori a nod to let him know he could put the girls down. Only she never told him to be gentle about it, instead he let them fall on the floor at full force. Thus why they woke up with aching heads. Of course Konan scolded him for it, but he just tuned her out.**_

_**- **_**End Flash Back -**

"You need not worry about it. And don't bother asking anyone else, they'll give you the same answer." Sasori told her solemly, perfectly aware that the truth would just make her and the other two spazz on him. He didn't feel like listening to them for an hour or two.

Takisha puffed up her cheeks and stomped away to the kitchen before any other misfortunes befell her. She'd badger Konan or Deidara about the measurement thing later.

**- In the Kitchen -**

"Awww! They ate all the pancakes!" Jenna whined falling to her knees and crying inside. She hadn't minded that she'd gotten seperated from Takisha and Kenzie. She'd be safer in the kitchen then the hallways. However upon finding the empty plate of pancakes Jenna lost all her energy.

Her stomach let out an audible growl, reminding her exactly HOW hungry she was. Jenna's body depended on a regular feeding, and it was well past the time she should have eaten. Pathetically crawling to the fridge she opened the door and looked over the contents. To her luck she found an apple and left over chicken from last night (She hadnt gotten to eat since Takisha had banned her for two days.) Grabbing the apple first she gratefully sunk her teeth in, the feel of the chewed apple mush felt incredible going down her throat. Clenching it between her teeth she snatached the left over chicken and put it on an oven safe plate. Turning the oven on low and putting the chicken in she smiled contently and continued eating the apple.

The sound of foot steps approaching and muted voices made Jenna choke on the last piece of apple she'd swallowed. Covering her mouth to stifle the couch she turned the stove off and hid the apple behind her back. Her coughing calmed down a bit at the same time Hidan and Itachi walked into the room. Upon seeing her with a hand over her mouth they both raised an eyebrow. She raised one right back, just so they didn't think she was sleeping on her feet. Itachi audibly smelt the air and stated," I smell apples and chicken." Playing it cool Jenna shrugged her shoulders.

"Nobody better have eaten my apple, I was saving that for after the next sacrifice I made to Jashin. And that left over chicken was going to be my lunch." Hidan said in fury, practiced fury that is. He actually had no interest in the apple and left over chicken. He just wanted to see how Freckles reacted. To his satisfaction Jenna started to sweat and shift from foot to foot.

Needing to breathe (she'd been holding her breath to stop coughing) Jenna let out a huff of air and instantly started coughing full force again. That piece of apple had really done a number going down. Itachi calmly asked," Something wrong?"

Shaking her head Jenna hastily replied," Oh 'cough' no. Just 'cough' had some spit 'cough' go down my 'cough' wind pipe." Her coughing slowed and finally stopped.

Hidan waited for that before opening the fridge and putting on a furious expression. Turning on Jenna he demanded," Alright wench, what'd you do with my food?!"

Shrinking back she squeaked," I - I didn't do anything with your food. I - I bet Deidara or... or Tobi ate them." She failed at that lie and she knew it.

Itachi decided to turn the heat up a notch and got behind Jenna to grab the half eaten apple. Holding it up for Hidan to see he said," Whoever did it didn't finish eating it. I find it convienant that the apple was right behind you, don't you agree Hidan?"

"Nice try bitch, but you're obviously the one that took the food. What'd you do, inhale the chicken and started eating the apple when we showed up?" Hidan inched closer to Jenna with each word, when he stopped talking he was practically face to face with her.

Putting on her most guitless face Jenna futily denied it," I'm telling the truth, I didn't eat the chicken or the apple! The apple being behind me can be a coincidence, you can not prove that I was eating that apple!" Crossing her arms she gave the guys a glare that intentionally dared them to prove her wrong. They didn't hesitate to take on that dare.

In a swift movement Itachi was in her face and kissing her. She was paralyzed by this for a millasecond before shoving him back and wiping her mouth on her sleeve. Itachi waited until she'd finished acting immature to monotonely say," You taste like apples. Proving you did eat the apple. But there was no hint of chicken. It's either hidden or someone else ate it."

Hidan smirked crookedly and said happily," Heh, I don't care about the apple or the chicken. I just wanted to mess with your Freckles. Bwahahaha!" Roaring with laughter he left the kitchen, and went to go outside for some fresh air.

---------------------------------------------------------

Outside Hidan met Zetsu who was keeping an eye out as usual. They neither acknowledged or ignored each other, though Hidan still wishes he could sacrifice Zetsu to Jashin. Jashin would like something different then normal people and stupid ninjas.

A defined twig snap was heard just around the large tree Zetsu had perched in, both men acted at once and pounced on whatever was there. Zetsu got to it first, and Hidan was slightly irked by that. He wanted to cause pain for someone, he hadn't gone on a mission in weeks and it was driving him balistick!

"Let me go!" A thrashing female was held by Zetsu, a very fine looking female at that.

Bending down to eye level Hidan put a finger under her chin and asked seductively," What brings you out here girl?"

"I came here to give Uchiha Itachi a letter, nothing more, nothing less! Now tell Mr. Veghead to let me go!" The girl turned her head away to remove Hidan's finger. She came to see Itachi and no one else, Hidan could go and sacrifice himself.

Scowling Hidan stood back up and grumbled," Fine, I'll get pretty boy. Don't eat her while I'm gone Zetsu."

"Not promising anything." Zetsu responded, it was getting hard to swallow his drool it was building up so fast.

A few minutes later Hidan returned with Itachi behind him, staring blankely down at the girl he asked," Name and reason?"

"Tracey, but you already know that from my other visits. I came to give you a letter, that's it." Tracey stated firmly, she was a tough girl, she wasn't intimidated by the fact that she could be killed in less than three seconds.

Itachi held out his hand for the letter, when it was given to him he tucked it into his cloak and walked away back to the cave. Tracey stuck her tongue out at him and muttered," Arrogant jerk." Zetsu let her go just in time for Hidan to boot in her the ass and sent her flying a good way away from the cave. When he couldn't see her he grumbled," Fucking fangirls."

-------------------------------------------------------------

Jenna gave Itachi a dirty look and turned the stove back on. Grabbing the apple she continued to eat it and made sure to avoid eye contact with him. Takisha walked into the kitchen, felt the super intense waves of tenseness and turned to leave again. She stopped when she heard a surpressed giggle. Spinning back around she saw Jenna had turned her back.

Going up to her Takisha asked darkly," Are you trying not to laugh at me?"

Jenna shook her head violently, her face bright red from the strain of keeping her mouth shut. Itachi leaned against the fridge, making sure to put out the new version of recording jutsu. **(J: Before the recording jutsu only recorded sound, now it records sounds and visions. In other words, it's a jutsu video camera. T: Oh fucking joy. K: Why did they invent such an awful thing? J: They need some way to black mail us, eh? T,K: NO THEY DON'T!! J: Oh well, too late now.)**

Takisha sniffed the air, her eyes squinting in suspicion she asked," Are you eating something? Even though you aren't allowed to eat ANYTHING for two days, it's only been one." Again Jenna shook her head in denial, the apple core in her hands with her fingers crossed. Itachi was starting to enjoy this inevitable trail to doom.

Walking around to try and see Jenna's face she stated," You're lying and failing at it Jenna."

"What are you doing?" Kenzie asked before Takisha could properly pounce on Jenna. Jenna took that moment to run for it, only to get snatched by the collar of her shirt by Itachi.

Takisha gave Itachi a nod of thanks and went around to stare Jenna in the eye. Kenzie stood beside Takisha looking just as stern as Takisha (for no reason.) Leaning close Takisha asked again," Were you trying not to laugh at me, and were you eating something?"

"Bwabsolutely not. 'Coughsnicker' You look fine in that tut, and I wasn't eating anything. I'm starving as we speak." Jenna lied through her teeth. Itachi had to hand it to her, she was really bad at lying. A few tests and training sessions with Zetsu would fix that.

At the mention of the tutu Kenzie _finally _took notice of what Takisha was wearing. Doubling over in laughter she wheezed," W-who's d-d-day is it?"

"Sasori's" Itachi replied, watching unamused as Kenzie fell to the floor holding her sides laughing. Takisha ignored her since she expected this reaction from Kenzie.

Jenna was having a much harder time not laughing, she'd have been allowed to laugh if she hadn't lied about not laughing. It didn't help that she now knew Sasori, of all people, had chosen the tutu. Itachi was becoming bored with this all and went to the oven. Turning it off and taking out the chicken he showed it to Takisha with a raised eyebrow. Takisha glared at Jenna and came up with an excellent idea for punishment, "Itachi-san, do you think it would be fair for Jenna to get to sleep in her room after misbehaving?" Jenna's eyes widened and Kenzie forced herself to stop laughing to see where this was going.

Itachi kept his face emotionless while he met the eyes of each of the girls, to their surprise he replied," Yes, I do think it's fair she gets to sleep in her own room." Kenzie thought he'd hit his head, Takisha was aware of the spark of evil in his eye and let him be, Jenna thought he was someone she liked much more than the normal Itachi.

"However, she shouldn't be allowed to sleep in her own room alone." Itachi finished, very proud of himself for his idea and the reaction he got from it. Takisha smirked wickedly at the horrified Jenna and Kenzie was one of those (O:) faces that was also a smile.

Eager to take part in this Kenzie suggested," I'm sure Deidara wouldn't mind keeping Jenna company tonight."

Jenna's eye twitched a thousand times over in one second, in a small squeaky voice she asked," How about I DO sleep alone tonight, but I do something else instead? Please?"

Takisha shook her head and poked Jenna in the chest saying in a firm motherlike voice," No, you were bad and bad girls get punished. I think Itachi-san chose a very suitable punishment. Kenzie, go ask Deidara what he thinks about this. If he doesn't want to, try Hidan."

"Wh-what?! Do you have any idea what you're saying in my perspective?! You're saying you don't care if I get raped by three...No, FOUR mouths! OR Sacrificed in my sleep!!! What kind of friends are you?!" Jenna dramatically yelled while flapping her arms like a deranged bird.

Takisha gave Jenna an unamused stare, only to smile cruelly a second later when she heard Deidara yell from down the hall," Oooh! Of course, un! Sounds like an excellent idea, un!" Looking back at Jenna she found empty air. Turning to Itachi he pointed to the door in the opposite direction of Deidara's voice. Shaking her head she set about on preparing lunch while Itachi went off to do who knows what.

**- Later that night -**

Jenna yawned for the fifth time in an hour, it was nearing midnight and she refused to go to bed. Kenzie (the owl she is) was still good for another hour or two. Takisha was slightly drowsy but was able to go on for a while longer. Of course all the guys were awake and ready for anything. Hearing Jenna yawn again Deidara asked in high hopes," Ready to go to bed, un?"

Shaking her head and fighting another yawn she grumpily responded," I'm staying up ALL night! Even if it kills me."

"Which it probably will." Takisha mumbled through her hand that was covering her mouth as she yawned.

"Not if I can help it, un." Deidara said, getting off the couch and picking up Jenna.

Wiggling around as much as possible she moaned in fatigue," Put me dooowwwn!!" Deidara just smirked and carried her off to her newly created and slightly furnished room.

When they were out of sight Kenzie asked no one in particular," So...who thinks she'll be raped in her sleep?"

Zetsu, Sasori, Kisame and Kakuzu raised their hands. Kakuzu took note of the hands and decided," 10 bucks each says she'll wake up with no clothes on."

"10 says she's clothed and untouched." Takisha added.

"I put 10 chocolate bars on Jenna-chan having her clothes on, but Deidara-sempai will still do something to her." Tobi put in when everyone had gone quiet. No one disagreed with that bet, they all knew Tobi had a stash of high quality candy in his room somewhere.

Kakuzu recorded all the names and wagers in his bet book, at the same time there was a sudden cry of," PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!!!! OR I KICK YOU OFF THE BED WHEN YOU'RE ASLEEP!!!"

Curious and also concerned about their money Kenzie and Takisha scurried over to Jenna's room. Poking their heads in the room they saw a grumpy Jenna beating Deidara back away from the bed with a pillow. What sent them into a hysteric fit of snickers was the fact that Deidara was in nothing but boxers, the very same boxers Jenna had borrowed for shorts. Haulting her assault she glared over at her supposed friends and growled," The only reason I'm in this situation is because of you two!!"

"Hm....Do you like this position better, un?" Deidara asked, poofing behind Jenna and grabbing her in a hug. To make it worse he fell back on the bed. Kenzie ran out of the room to both try and stop laughing, as well as to demand her money early.

Takisha stuck around long enough to remind Jenna,"You brought this uponyourself and you know it. Deidara, keep in mind. Get her pregnant, and YOU brought THAT upon yourself." That took some spark out of Deidara's perverted smile, it also made Jenna thrash about with a tomatoe blush on her face. Proud of herself Takisha sauntered back to the living room.


	9. Team Training

**J: Woot! Look, I didn't slack off this time! "Happy dancing"**

**K: Whatever, just get...on...wi...Takisha....**

**T: Ya?**

**K: Do. Not. Move.**

**T: Eh?**

**J: 0.o Takisha...There is an exploding spider on your shoulder.**

**T: D8**

**Dei: "Snickering from behind a fake wall."**

**J: "Radar ears perk up" DEIDARA!!! CALL YOUR SPIDER OFF, NOW!!!**

**Dei: Why should I, un?! You made a fool of me in this chapter!!**

**K: SHUT UP! YOU'LL GIVE STUFF AWAY!!**

**Dei: Then delete that part out now, un! Or Takisha-chan can walk around without a head!**

**J: NEVER!!!**

**T: JENNA!!!**

**K: "Sneaks away...Tackles Deidara" Haha! Now then, call off the spider, or your shiny silky hair gets to meet Mr. Scissors! "Holds up a pair of scissors with a face of evil drawn on it."**

**Dei: You wouldn't, un.**

**K: Wanna bet?**

**Dei: "Glares, glares, glares." Fine, un. "Makes the spider leave Takisha's shoulder. Sicks it after Kenzie."**

**K: AAAAHHHHHH!!! "Running away into the distance."**

**J: -.-" Okay....Deidara since your here, albeit for bad intentions such as sabotaging this chapter, you can disclaim.**

**Dei:......Okay! "Checks for crazy fangirls from past chapters" All Naruto characters named do not belong to Jenna, they belong to Misashi Kishimoto, who I still need to visit to discuss the matter of a certain appendage loss. "Gets tackled by random fangirls."**

**Rabid Fangirls: EEEE! DEIDARA! WE LOVE YOOOU!**

**Dei: Cya, un! "Poofs away, leaving the rabid girls to cry."**

**K: Phew! Good thing I thought fast with the fangirls, that spider almost got me! **

**J: Ya...Okay. Anyways, enjoy!**

**

* * *

**

Chapter Eight - Team Training

Bright and early the next morning everyone stood outside Jenna's closed door. Takisha was the one that reminded everyone that Jenna's door hadn't been closed when she left them. "So, who wants to do the door opening honours?" Kenzie asked slightly groggy while rubbing grit from her eyes.

Itachi stepped forward, unfazed by the privacy intrusion he was doing. Pushing open the door and walking in with the others behind him they all crowded around the bed. Kenzie and Takisha had to fight back a huge wave of snickers so not to wake up Deidara, who currently had his arms around Jenna, who was by her own free will, snuggling up against him. In a low whisper Kisame asked," How do we tell if anything happened?"

"Look around, Jenna's pajamas aren't on the floor and neither are Deidara's boxers. So if we were to remove the blankets, which we won't, we'd find them both...kinda...dressed. Meaning nothing happened. Meaning, I win my share of money." Takisha educated them happily, she'd been right to bring up the pregnancy thing last night.

"Wait! Wait! Look Takisha-chan!" Tobi very carefully pulled the covers down, revealing Jenna's neck. Which to everyone's surprise and misfortune, had one hell of a hickey. It was just as Tobi had guessed, Deidara didn't rape Jenna, but he did do something to her.

The quiet and not-so-quiet grunts that everyone let out aroused Jenna, opening her eyes she was rather befuddled to find the majority of the Akatsuki hovering around her bed. Feeling the unusually amount of heat around her she blushed and remembered who'd spent the night with her. With a big heave she disengaged herself from Deidara while at the same time pushing him off the bed. On impact with the floor he woke up with a jolt, gazing around he asked sleepily," What'd I miss, un?"

"Nothing sempai. You hit it right on the mark!" Tobi laughed to himself while leaving to avoid the dark glares from everyone.

Confused Jenna asked," Do we get an explanation, or do we have to figure it out for ourselves?"

Takisha and Kenzie pointed to their necks to answer her, suspicious she grabbed the cup of water off her dresser and looked at the reflection. In one second Jenna went from calm but suspicious to raging fury ready to kill. Spinning on Deidara she asked," What the fuck did you do?!!?"

Deidara smiled sinisterly and giggled," I couldn't resist, un. Your neck just screamed for it while you slept. You weren't complaining either, quite the opposite really, un." That over killed Takisha, Kenzie, Kisame and Hidan. Grabbing a pillow Jenna proceeded to beat Deidara senseless, or at least try to since the pillow wasn't very painful.

**- Later that morning at the breakfeast table -**

"Alright listen up everyone......Deidara you have a feather in your hair.....Anyway, as I was saying, starting today you will be beginning your team training. As soon as you feel you're prepared go immediately." Pein informed them at the table. He wasn't blind to the fact that Kenzie and Takisha weren't moving, and Jenna was currently choking on her french toast.

Konan stepped up next and addressed the girls," You three need to come to my room for your training gear. You'll die in just what you're wearing now, trust me." 'It's always amusing how scared they get.' Konan thought while heading to her room with the girls following behind like ducklings. Scared shitless ducklings.

When the girls were out of sight Leader turned to the guys and asked," Tell me, what have you decided to do for training?"

Zetsu stood first, " I plan to show her the full perimeter, but after that I will start attacking her and testing her on the knowledge of the trap set ups." Leader nodded in agreement with this.

Hidan followed up after," Our girl's going to go through hell and back. We're going to ditch her in the woods, then come at her with various attacks and traps." Leader nodded but couldn't help but feel a tiny amount of sympathy.

Kisame stood for him and Itachi, a big sharky smile on his face he said two all explaining words," Survival training." Leader felt even worse for Kenzie, but yet he still didn't regret bringing them to their dimension. He's noticed that Konan's alot happier, and he could only guess that it was because there were more females present.

"So guys, what do you think?" Konan asked all too peppy while shoving the girls forward.

Before they'd been wearing the clothes they'd chosen, (only Takisha was wearing Hidan's selection of the day. He'd chosen a beautiful set of slave rags. In other words, a tattered tank top and barely covering skirt. Takisha didn't mind it as much as she should have.) Now they were still wearing their clothes, only they had a few added accessories. Like a kunai pouch, a scroll pouch that held smoke bombs and only two paper bombs. Konan had also forced the three of them to put black war lines on their faces. So of course Deidara and Hidan errupted into fits of laughter. Pointing accussingly at Konan, Kenzie yelled," It was her idea not ours!" They didn't care, they just kept laughing.

Talking over the two idiots laughing Leader asked the girls," Do you feel prepared?"

"Um...yes?" Takisha answered uncertainly, Jenna wasn't sure either and Kenzie didn't think she'd ever be prepared for her ass to be kicked a hundred times over.

"Good enough. Get going and don't come back until tonight. Oh and girls. Don't die, it would be a shame to lose you after all the work we went through to get you." Leader then vanished to get some paper work done.

The way Leader had said that last sentence to the girls put goosebumps all over their skin. They didn't get to feel it for long though, the guys were ready and eager to go. Zetsu came up behind Jenna, grabbed her in a death grip hug and simply instructed," Hold your breathe." She almost let go of the breathe she took in when Zetsu took her underground with him.

Slightly shaking Takisha asked," Since when has he been able to take people underground with him?"

"Since he decided to be a cannibal. No more questions, get moving Army Barbie." Hidan grunted shoving Takisha towards the cave exit.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!!" Takisha yelled, attempting to glare and shake her fist at Hidan at the same time. Hidan ignored her and continued pushing her along.

Once it was quiet in the cave Kenzie nervously asked Itachi and Kisame, " So, what are we doing?"

Kisame put on what had to be the most intimidating and scary smile Kenzie had ever seen someone have. His eyes were almost glazed over with evil when he whispered," Run." Kenzie never imagined she could run as fast as she did out of that cave.

Itachi raised an eyebrow at Kisame's display of menace. Kisame snickered and explained," I've always wanted to do that." Itachi rolled his eyes while shaking his head and finished his tea. He hated leaving tea unfinished.

**- In some random part of the forest -**

Zetsu surfaced from the ground, uncaring that Jenna had nearly passed out from lack of oxygen. Pushing her away from him he grumbled," I'll give you life points for holding your breathe that long. So that puts you at 15."

Gasping for air while getting the dirt out of her hair Jenna asked" Life points? What are they for?"

"Exactly as they sound. They're points that keep you alive. The more you get, the longer you stay alive. When you hit zero, I eat you. Got it?" Zetsu explained, grinning in revelance at Jenna's terrified nodding head.

In her head Jenna thought sadly, ' Oh great, the second I start mouthing back or anything he doesn't like will get me killed! Be a good girl Jenna! Not super good to the point of Tobiness, just good enough to keep living.' Zetsu silently motioned for her to follow him. As they walked Jenna asked quietly," So...What kind of things will earn me points?"

"You do as I say, don't get in my way, and do things quick and effectively. Also depends on my mood. Come over here. You see this faint line? That marks the perimeter of our territory. Anyone steps past that line, they're fair game. Understand?" Zetsu looked over at Jenna and found she was staring at the line further down.

Going over to her he said calmly," You just lost two life points. What are you doing?"

Pointing to the line in front of her she simply informed him," The line's broken here. Does that affect anything?"

"Hmmm.. The line shouldn't have been broken, it was laid down using chakra. I'll fix it later, good spotting. You get one point back. Now keep up." Zetsu tugged Jenna up from her crouched position and guided her around the rest of the perimeter.

**- In another part of the woods -**

Takisha, the natural blonde she was , didn't do very good on being observational. She managed to trip over at least five tree roots only two minutes into the woods. It wasn't until the last tree root she tripped over that Hidan and Kakuzu ditched her. When she stood back up and found herself alone she did the first thing that came to mind, she yelled at the top of her lungs," YOU FUCKING JERKS!! THIS IS TOTALLY UNFAIR!! YOU DIDN'T EVEN GIVE ME A HEADS UP OR ANY-AHH!!!" Before Takisha could finish her screaming rant Hidan's scythe flew out from the tree tops above her and just nearly skinned her head off.

Flat on her stomach she whimpered," That's even more unfair...Hm....Something...is...TOUCHING!!" Jumping up quickly Takisha found she nearly had Kuzu's threads dig into her stomach.

Hugging herself to stop shaking she finally realized that theses two wanted to train her the hard way. It was either dodge, run, hide or die. 'I bet Kenzie and Jenna are getting off easier than me.' She thought before diving into a bush to avoid Hidan's scythe.

Doing the best she could Takisha zipped over to the bush over, that would give her at least a couple of second to think of a plan to make this end. A gust of wind and an explosion of dirt told Takisha she had two more seconds. The explosion of dirt made something click in her head, reaching into her back pouch of goodies she pulled out one of her paper bombs. An idea developed in the depths of her fear driven mind, she just needed Hidan or Kakuzu to attack again.

**- In the woods close to the lake -**

Kenzie sat in a crouching position trying to catch her breathe. Running as hard and fast as she did, didn't agree with her body. Her legs in particular. Rubbing her aching calves she muttered," Stupid Kisame, didn't even tell me what we're doing." 'THUNK' 'PSSS' "Oh, SHIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!" From what appeared to be out of nowhere a kunai with a paper bomb attached landed in the tree next to her. The explosion was barely enough to blow up a car.

Coming out of the protection of the forest she snagged her foot on a length of pulled wire. Falling on her face she groaned, today was going to be a long one. Looking up Kenzie faintly saw 50 other tightened pieces of wire between the trees. Being the stubborn smarty pants she was she came up with a simple solution to the spide web problem. **( K: They're not spider webs! Don't mention spiders! I hate spiders! "Flailing arms." T: "Looks at Jenna" You just inspired her with your outburst. "Points to scheming Jenna talking with Kisame." K: o.0 JENNA! "Attacks" J: "Hides behind grinning Kisame." Ki: You need to learn how to keep things to yourself, you know that? K: "Still attempting to break Jenna's fingers" J: Tehe. "Running around Kisame" Ki: "Unamused, poofs away.") **Carefully standing up she put her feet together and hopped forward, to her satisfaction she landed on another cord, it felt funny under her feet. **(J: Forgot to say earlier, but the girls got their own pair of sandals. T: I like having my toes out. They feel funny at the same time. K: I hate them, they feel too weird.)**

Hopping forward she landed on two more cords, but unlike the other one it didn't hold, or actually, Itachi cut it. What hurts more than tripping and falling on your face? Having metal cords whip your legs after being cut. Kenzie felt the blood trickle down her legs before she felt the sting. When the sting hit her she had to bite back tears, but she didn't fight her screams," MOTHER FUCKING SHIT BASTARD!! YOU TWO WILL DIE WHEN I FIND YOU!!!"

" We highly doubt thst." Kisame's voice echoed from all the trees. 'Right, of course these jerks know vantriliquism. Fucking unfair.' Kenzie though grumpily,forcing her mind to focus on anything but the pain on the back of her legs.

**- Trailing Zetsu -**

"Wooow, that's alot of ground to watch. How exactly do you do it Zetsu-san?" Jenna asked genuily curious, Zetsu had just finished showing her the full perimeter of the grounds. And there was ALOT of ground to watch.

Zetsu turned to his kinda-apprentice with a cheeky smirk on the black side of his face. Leaning in close to her face Zetsu said lecherously," That question can be taken the wrong way, girl. And I'd gladly answer and demonstrate if you don't mind dying." Chills went down Jenna's back as she quickly shook her head.

Zetsu's white side joined his other side with the cheeky smile, straightning up and turning his back to her he said to the trees," Got bored did you?"

"That, and we got kicked out, un. How's the runt of the group doing so far, un?" Deidara asked, jumping out of the trees and landing beside Zetsu. Sasori decided to land next to Jenna and scare the crap out of her.

Planting her hands on her hips Jenna grumbled," I'm NOT a runt. My body just decided to stop growing when I was 10." That got a bunch of raised eyebrows.

Deidara bent over to get on eye level with her, a big smile on his face he told her smugly," For your information, I was the shortest Akatsuki member before you came along. And if we were to stand everyone beside each other, you'd see that you are the runt of our group, un." Jenna turned away from Deidara with her cheeks puffed out. Deidara smiled some more and pat her on the head.

Sasori had been talking quietly to Zetsu as Deidara degraded Jenna. After they finished Zetsu vanished, Jenna blinked twice before asking in confusion," Um, where did Zetsu-san go?"

"He is locating himself somewhere on the perimeter, and you must find him within the time limit we assign. Which is twenty minutes. You get a three second head start. After which Deidara and myself will pursue and attack you. Go." Sasori explained monotonely, he smiled a tiny fraction when Jenna swore and ran off.

Deidara smirked, looking at Sasori from the corner of his eye he asked," Are you trying to outdo Hidan and kill her for a puppet first, danna?" Sasori didn't reply, he just started off after Jenna.

**- Hiding with Takisha -**

Her idea was set and ready to be put into action. She just needed one of the jerks to attack again...It's been five minutes since one of them had attacked, meaning something was very wrong. They were either on to her plan or they were planning something of their own. Being brave Takisha dared to poke her head up out of the bush, she didn't see anything except a squirrel that was having problems holding onto it's nuts. **(T: "Snickers" J: Way to defile an innocent rodent Takisha. T: What? I wasn't snickering at the squirrel. J: What were you laughing at then? T: That. "Points to a random curtain." J: I don't get it. T: Look behind the it. J: "Pulls back curtain slightly. Dies of laughter." Dei: "Straightning his hair behind the curtain." K: "Cough"GIRLYMAN!"cough" Dei: "Blushes and closes curtain, only making Kenzie, Jenna, and Takisha laugh harder.") **Looking closer at the squirrel Takisha realized something...The squirrel had a bomb attached to it. **(J: Didn't copy! They used a chipmunk in the series.)**

Before she could jump at the squirrel to save it the bomb went off, resulting in her clothes and hair getting covered in squirrel guts. She stood totally immobilized, unblinking and barely breathing. Obnoxious laughter errupted behind her, Takisha's eye twitched twice. Then, she snapped.

Hidan and Kakuzu watched as watched as their sad excuse of a team member stood wide open for attack. Half smirking Hidan scoffed," What a bimbo. If we weren't holding back she'd be dead right now."

"Hidan, Leader-san said she's been captured and altered by Orochimaru. Correct?" Kakuzu asked, his voice holding no emotion. His red and green eyes focused on Takisha.

Hidan raised an eyebrow and looked back down at Takisha. He didn't know what Kakuzu was going on about but he replied," Hai. He said Orochimaru had put some kind of mark on her. What the fuck does this have to do with anything?"

Kakuzu's gaze turned from Takisha to Hidan, they held the smallest sign of astoundment. Pointing to the space behind Hidan he said," It's made her stronger."

Hidan turned around in time to see Takisha lunging at him with a kunai. Only it somehow wasn't Takisha. Her skin was covered in black leaf petals and her eyes were no longer brown, but red. Too slow to react Takisha managed to get the kunai into Hidan's arm, almost barried to the hilt. Wincing he jumped back yelling," Son of a bitch! How'd you do that?!"

"How about you die first! Then I'll tell you your answer!!" Takisha yelled, pulling out two smoke bombs and whipping them at Kakuzu and Hidan's heads. The second they exploded she jumped off the tree and drew two more kunai.

Going straight into the smoke she headed for the mass outline of Kakuzu. Throwing both kunai forward she wasn't discouraged by Kakuzu vanishing. She was ticked when he reappeared behind her and grabbed her in a bear hug. Thrashing around she screamed," LET ME GO! YOU NEED TO DIE!!"

The smoke cleared and Hidan stood in front of her. Crouching down to eye level he glared at her and asked," Where did you get all this power bitch?"

"DIE FIRST!! THEN I'LL TELL YOU!" Takisha yelled back, nearly spitting in his face too.

Straightning back up Hidan said to Kakuzu," No point in talking to her now. She's too crazy to converse."

"Gee, remind you of anyone else this annoying?" Kakuzu asked sarcastically. Kakuzu intertwined several of his tentacles to make them tick and heavy. With a quickl flick it lashed against Takisha's neck to knock her out. They watched as the black design on her skin retreated to a solitary mark on the base of her neck where it met the shoulder blade. Around the mark was a seal that must not have been very strong. The mark had had no problem surpassing the seal. Leader would need to be informed of this.

**- Hiding in a log -**

Kenzie somehow managed to get to a hollow log while stopping the flow of blood on the back of her legs. The dried blood felt icky, especially since there were a few leaves stuck to her as well. Peeking out of an open hole in front of her she grumbled," Stupid assholes need to get a kick in the face. Though getting them to bend over for me to kick them will be the hardest part." At the same second she finished her sentence the log shook and tilted.

Braching her hands against the sides of the log Kenzie yelled," Son of a bitch!! STOP SHAKING THE LOG!!" To demonstrate that Itachi and Kisame had heard her they sealed rocks on either end of the log and proceeded to roll it three times.

With each roll Kenzie swear words got more vial (they could hear her thanks to a hole in the log.)

First roll - "I DAMN YOU TO HELL!!"

Second roll - " I HOPE YOU DIE BY SUFFOCATING IN A PILE OF SHIT!!!"

Third roll - " STOP ROLLING THE FUCKING LOG AND GO BE GAY WITH EACH OTHER!!!!" That scarily made the log stop rolling. There wasn't any sound for the longest time, making Kenzie's slight case of claustrophobi intensify. It was so bad that her heart beat was magnified times ten in volume.

'CRACK!' Went the sound of the log as it was karate chopped in half bu Itachi. Kenzie barely managed to cover her eyes in time to prevent splinters from getting in them. When she opened her eyes she really wished she'd gotten Zetsu for a teammate, even Deidara and Sasori would be better. Itachi and Kisame were glaring at her with eyes that screamed, 'YOU WILL DIE!!' Quickly clapping her hands together in prayer she squeaked," Don't kill me! I take it back! I WANT TO LIVE!!"

She'd pleaded all this with her eyes closed, so when she opened them she found that Itachi was giving her an unamused expression. They stood in silence for what felt like an hour before Kisame finally spoke," I say we just tie you to a tree for the night and see how long it takes Leader-san to notice your absence. How's that sound Itachi-kun?"

Itachi studied Kenzie's face, after gauging her scaried shitless expression as worthy he looked back at Kisame to answer," That sounds like a decent punishment. Though all I have is barbed wire, you?"

"Hmmm...I don't have any rope, but I do have greased wire the smallest spark could ignite. Which one sounds more comfortable Kenzie?" Kisame asked the already crying Kenzie. **(K: Why?! WHY DO I HAVE TO CHOOSE MY TORTURE! J: Okay. Takisha, which one sounds better to you? T: Hmmm, well, the barbed wire does sound tempting... K: 0.e T: But greased wire would probably be more interesting. The greased wire will get the grease on your clothes, so even after you're untied. You still have a good chance of catching on fire. J: That does sound good. "Pats paralyzed Kenzie" Enjoy the grease. K: B-but...I HATE YOU ALL!!!)**

"You will use neither. Pein was right to ki- I mean, send me out to check on you. You were taking way too long." Konan announced, making her presence known by jumping down from the tree she'd been hiding on.

Itachi and Kisame exchanged looks to say ' Why are we the ones being spied on?' Kenzie continued crying, but only out of happiness. If it weren't for Konan she'd be bleeding or on fire. Itachi let go of Kenzie's shirt collar to drop her on the ground. Rubbing her butt Kenzie grumbled," Someone has a stick shoved up their ass. Ow!" Itachi had smacked her in the back of the head, hard.

Kisame shifted Samehada on his back in a show of agitation, giving Konan a dirty look he asked," What happened with Leader? Usually you two go at it until we get back. You ware him down early?" He smirked smugly when Konan (and Kenzie) turned bright red.

Konan could have sworn Itachi was smirking behind his collar too. Resisting the urge to smack them silly she crossed her arms and grouched," Keep your mouth shut. What we do with our free time is non of your concern. Kenzie, head back to the cave, Takisha's already back...Only unconscious. I need to go check up on Jenna. No Itachi, you're not coming." She added that part on just to get back at the jerk in some manner.

More than happy to oblige Kenzie got on her feet and ran for it, but she didn't leave until Konan got a hug of appreciation first.

**- Running with Jenna -**

"How unfair can these bastards get?! First they put me with the cannibal, which I didn't mind too much. And now they make me play 'Hide and Seek to the Death!' " Jenna had a bait of talking to herself when she was both alone and frustrated or bored. At the moment she was the latter.

Not too long ago Deidara had been dropping clay bombs on her by the truck loads. Since he'd stopped Jenna assumed he'd either run out or was making something big. Sasori hadn't tried anything yet, meaning he was waiting for the perfect opportunity.

'Okay, if I were Zetsu, where would I hide...Underground 'cause he's a stupid cheating ninha that wants to eat me.' Jenna thought sourly, at the same time she glanced over her shoulder to try and see the blonde and the puppet. Only they weren't there, making Jenna's paranoia rise up another notch. "SURPRISE, UN!"

From out of no where Deidara sprang out of the bushes and dropped a clay bomb on the ground in front of her. A second too late to jump for cover Jenna was sent flying backwards. After slamming into a tree she staggered to her feet groaning," That jerk! That was more than uncalled for."

"Not necessarily, if he had killed you, that would have been more than uncalled for. But then we could eat you." Zetsu's voice added on, coming from the tree Jenna had just been thrown against.

A triumphant smile on her face Jenna cried," I found you! I found him! So no more attacking!!" She directed these calls more so to Deidara and Sasori than Zetsu. Who, by then, had poked his head out of the tree trunk.

Sasori made himself visible from the shadow of another tree. Pointing to the sun he smugly informed her," You had twenty minutes to find Zetsu, it has been twenty six minutes. So you fail, and will have to do this exercise again. You will have to continue this exercise until you can get it right." Deidara burst out in laughter when Jenna fell backwards foaming at the mouth. Zetsu and Sasori shook their heads, how did Leader-sama really expect them to turn a nobody into a shinobi?

Bending down Zetsu picked her up and carried her like a sack of potatoes. Sighing he grumbled," We've got much work to do. _Work that will take forever_" His minds spoken he trudged off back to the lair.


	10. FreeTimeIsn'tSomethingtoLookForwardTo

**J : "Pokes head up from behind some furniture" Hiii everyone...um, you probably all hate me very much for not updating since some time last year. But it couldn't helped...that much....I lost the note book I was typing from, never found (fucking gnome) so I had rewrite this chapter loosely off of everything else I've posted. And let me tell you, what you're going to read for the next little bit will probably suck BIG TIME cause I haven't actually written this fanfiction in so long. But yeah, my posting for this fanfic are back huzzah!!**

**T,K: IT'S ABOUT FUCKING TIME!!!**

**J: "Ducks back behind furniture"**

**T: "Glare"**

**K: Okay, since she's hiding out for a while until everyone loves her again, I will disclaim. "Clears throat" Jenna does not own any Naruto characters or place or anything Naruto related in total that will be mentioned. So now the lawyers can't hate her. Enjoy!**

**T: Oh, and since she can't say it. She still has the disclaimer system in effect. Any readers that want a specific character to review just need say so, and if you want you can also talk with the person you asked to disclaim. Okay, now you can start reading!**

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Chapter Nine – Free Time Isn't Something To Look Forward To Anymore

Takisha, Kenzie, and Jenna sat tired, hurting and pissed beyond reasoning on the living room couch. They didn't care if Leader wanted to kill them for failing epically at their training, all they wanted was to be left alone for the remainder of their lives!

Leader held the final reports from the guys about the girls' current status. He'd expected bad markings, but what he held were papers that marked the girls as absolute, a hundred percent failures. If there was any trace of shinobi material in them, it was buried deep, deep, DEEP down inside them. Making eye contact with each of the girls he got only one message. 'We want to kill you so many times, you can't count it on your fingers.' Ignoring the waves of negativity he told the girls, " According to these reports you are anything but shinobi material."

"Soooo, can we go back home and you can say we were an utter waste of your time?" Takisha asked hopefully, though she and the others knew the answer they were going to get.

"No. However I've decided to let you and the other members have the afternoon off. You're free to do as you wish as long as you stay within the grounds. At supper I'll give you further information concerning training and helping your development." That said Leader poofed away, leaving the three girls to sit and ponder.

Blowing her ever growing bangs out of her face Kenzie grumbled," He says we have the afternoon off, but what the hell can we do here?!" To add to her words she looked at the television set sitting across from them.

Kakuzu refused to let anyone watch T.V. during the day due to costs. So during the day he kept it encased in an invisible chakra force field. If you touched it you body goes numb for two hours. **(T: And how did we learn about this? J: I tried to watched T.V. in the middle of the night. K: And let me guess who found you. J: You'd be surprised actually. Go ahead and guess though. K: Kakuzu? J: Nope. Tobi found me, he got up to steal some of Deidara's cookies. Dei : I knew it was that masked annoyance, un! To: Ah! Tobi was a good boy, Tobi only ate two senpai! Dei: You mean two boxes, un! Come here so I can strangle you, un! "Chases after Tobi" J,K,T: -.-")**

Jenna stretched out and sighed," I'm taking a nap to get all the energy back that was beaten and scared out of me. Takisha can you get me up in an hour or two?"

"Yeah, no problem. Keep your door unlocked though, I need to be able to get in to actually wake you up." Takisha replied, an evil glint in her eye that Jenna missed.

Kenzie caught sight of it though. She waited until Jenna left the room before asking Takisha," What are you thinking now?"

"I'm thinking that certain other people are just as bored as we are. We just need to ask the right person." She answered while rubbing her hands together diabolically.

Kenzie let that sink in for a second, but before it completely did her mind twisted it into something worse. Smiling she suggested," Try suggesting it to Itachi. But before that, can you make a bit of soup. I'm hungry , and there's only meat in the fridge." 'And while you're doing that, I'm going to talk to a few…acquaintances. They will never earn the title of friends…Except Tobi.'

Takisha sighed from irritation but still went off to the kitchen. The moment she was out of sight Kenzie ran for the hallway of bedrooms. Her first stop, Hidan's room.

On the outside of the door was Jashin's symbol, drawn in Hidan's favorite colour. Blood red. Drawn in blood of course. **(J: In order for things to make sense I must inform you that Kenzie took off her ninja shoes, just because they felt weird on her feet.) **Stepping up to the door she was about to knock, only to be stopped by the sound of an adult male screaming in agony. She suddenly had to hold her breathe in order to not scream. Whoever Hidan just killed was very close to the door. No sooner had the screaming behind the door end did Kenzie feel a warm thick substance seep out and touch her feet. If she looked down , she'd definitely scream and Hidan would come out and yell at her. Not a good thing to happen. Taking a deep breath Kenzie knocked on the door twice. Five seconds passed before the door cracked open enough for Hidan to look out. Seeing Kenzie his single eye glared while asking," What the fuck do you want bitch? I'm busy enjoying my religion."

"I heard. Just wanted to ask if you'd want to do something more amusing with your free time? I promise it'll be worth your time." Kenzie made sure she said the right things to pique Hidan's interest.

Hidan's one eye ceased glaring, the door shut then reopened fully. Only to reveal he was totally naked. Slapping her hands over her eyes she yelled," Excuse me, but not everyone can tolerate seeing you totally nude Hidan!"

"Get use to it, I never wear clothes on my afternoons off. Now tell me what the fuck you were talking about." Hidan casually leaned against the door frame to put emphasis on the not-caring- that-anyone-can-see-me-naked.

Kenzie then explained her ultimate plan, Hidan in the end grinned maliciously and agreed to cooperate to a certain extent. **(K: What's the ultimate plan?! It's not fair for the person running it not to know the layout! J: Hush, hush. It'll be more interesting when it actually happens. K: That is a lousy excuse of saying you don't know what's going to happen. T: You're just making this up as you go along aren't you? J:… You can't prove anything! "Runs away" T: She fails at everything doesn't she? K: Besides being a pervert and writing decent fanfiction. Yes.)**

Her first group member added successfully she went onto the next. Them being Kisame, Deidara and Kakuzu (at the price of two dollars…stolen from Deidara.) Everyone knowing the plan they went straight to work. Well, all of them expect Kenzie, who had to go to the kitchen and keep Takisha distracted. Which wasn't very hard. It went like this.

"Takisha, can you get me a glass of milk?"

"Takisha, can you hand me the salt?"

"Any chance you'll make a dessert too T?"

The dessert request was the final straw of her tolerance. Stamping her foot Takisha fumed," Okay, that's it. You're either turning into an ungrateful jerk like them , or you're distracting me. Which is it?" When a girl asks for an answer while holding a butcher knife, you give her the almost truth.

Holding her hands up in surrender Kenzie lied," Okay, I'm just trying to distract you. But only so you won't wake Jenna up right away. It'll be funnier if she's woken up by someone besides you, AND she can't get to sleep tonight because she slept too long during the day."

"That…sounds like a really stupid idea. I don't think that's an evil enough ploy to even make Tobi laugh diabolically. Let's just leave it with Itachi waking her up. We need to go talk to him first." Takisha moved to leave the kitchen, and she would have managed to if a set of chakra strings didn't suddenly come out of nowhere and stop her.

Stuck in midstep Takisha yelled," What the hell?! Sasori!!"

Kenzie turned to the doorway behind them to find Sasori leaning against the doorframes. Raising an eyebrow Kenzie asked," And you're doing that, why?"

"Because I'm bored. And I want in on your plan." Sasori answered boredly, only the last part about the plan was said in a whisper.

Smiling, Kenzie walked over to Sasori and asked," Can you hold her here for another ten minutes or so? After that make her go to her room."

Sasori gave Kenzie a cocky smirk, as she walked past him he whispered," You're not allowed to create plans and involve only a few members. It's not very nice you know." For maybe a nanosecond Kenzie thought he was saying she'd hurt his feelings, but she highly doubted that.

Onwards to Takisha's room she went.

Meanwhile in Jenna's room –

'Toss' 'Toss' 'Toss' "AUGH!! I can't sleep! But I want to! Damnit!!" Jenna layed spread out on her bed, her hair messed up from being twisted and knotted on the pillow.

Sitting up Jenna looked around her practically bare bedroom. Her eyes fell on the little desk with a stack of paper and a pencil on it's surface. Unable to sleep she decided to do what she thought she did best. Write.

_' Dear Diary,_

_I am absolutely pissed that I am in a hostile environment, and cannot get to sleep. What is worse is knowing that anything I write will not remain secret. I am living in a cave filled with men trained to uncover ANYTHING secret. I could hide this paper anywhere, and they would still find it. So you're probably wondering why I'm even bothering to write a diary. Simple. I just won't be writing anything vitally important. This will just be a log book about anything happens. For example : Today Zetsu showed me the boundaries of the Akatsuki's territory. Then right after he did, I got my ass handed to me by Deidarass and Sassy Sorry. God he's going to kill me when/if he ever reads that. Oh well, use to that knowledge. So yeah, that's the only eventful shit for today. Will probably update later tonight. – Jenna AKA The Akatsuki's Prisoner. P.S. I miss Gaara "Cry" '_

The entry finished Jenna rolled up the paper, folded it, then slipped it into her shoe. Paper is a good insulator, and a shoe can be a good hiding spot. Feeling hungry Jenna went off to the kitchen to find a snack.

In Takisha's Room –

"Okay, I think everything's ready. We just need to get Takisha in here. Deidara go tell Sasori that he can bring her in." Kenzie pointed at the lounging blonde on the floor.

Making a face he demanded," Why do I have to go get her, un? Your plan, your friend, you go get her,un."

"Go, or I'll get rid of all your beauty products from your room. I'm syre Shreds will enjoy having a pretty stomach." Kenzie added as a threat, she wasn't sure if Deidara actually had beauty products, but by the veins popping out of his forehead her guess must have been pretty accurate.

Getting to his feet Deidara muttered angrily," Fine, I'll go, un. But you're just making me go because you're jealous that I'm good looking and you're ugly."

"Your mom's ugly."

"Pfft, you've never even seen my mom, un."

"Don't need to, you're probably her spitting image." Kenzie countered to the approving laughter from Kisame, Kakuzu and Hidan.

Gritting his teeth Deidara left the room, in, his mind he swore unmerciful revenge on Kenzie. Feeling triumphant Kenzie asked the guys," Okay. So the trap is ready? The face paint is ready? And the cameras are ready?"

Kisame nodded. Kakuzu nodded, and Hidan nodded. But they all chorused in their minds, ' The second trap set for target three, set and ready. Mwahaha!' When hey thought this Kenzie got a sudden chill of absolute horror go down her spine.

Looking back at her fellow conspirators she was disturbed to find the three looming men all smiling. Smiling like they had a dirty secret about her. Pointing she asked," You're all smiling. Why are you smiling? Any of the Akatsuki smiling is NOT a good thing. Especially for the three of us non- Akatsuki females. So either tell me what you're planning, or I run."

" Hehehe, I'd like to see you try and run." Kakuzu laughed and pointed to Kenzie's ankles. She groaned in frustration to find Kakuzu's tentacles wrapped around her ankles and calves. So she'd be stuck to watch Takisha's misery, and then endure her own. Exactly what she wanted.

A second later she heard Takisha's voice down the hall," Will you let me go already?! And since when do you listen to what Deidara says? Last I checked it was the other way around."

"Do you ever stop talking blondie? Your voice is getting to be quite annoying, un." Deidara bitched and almost flipped his hair out of his face. **(J: Almost because he figured he'd be insulted endlessly for being girlie. T: I really wish he had. K: Same. Damn him for ruining our vocal abusing fun. Dei: 'Sticks out three tongues.' J,T,K: 'Sticks out their tongues to be even.' Dei: 'Takes off shirt and cloak to reveal chest mouth and sticks that tongue out.' J,T,K: DAMNIT!)**

Takisha would have slapped him or something along those lines if Sasori didn't have her restrained. Instead she growled," Look who's talking Mr. Four Mouths. Now can you pretty please tell me why we're going to my room?"

"For this." Sasori flicked his fingers and sent Takisha flying onto her bed. Which then set the trap into motion.

Feeling the adjustment in weight the modified bed snapped in half, encasing Takisha's body in mattress tight enough that she couldn't move, but loose enough for her to breath. Squirming around Takisha wheezed," What the fuck are you doing?! Let me go, or you can all starve!!"

"Pfft, yeah right. We can just get take out, Zetsu needs some fresh meat to chew on anyways." Kisame flapped his hand in a dismissal gesture. Hidan looked over at Kakuzu to see him giving Kisame the ' Non of the money is coming from me, or the Akatsuki funds.' Hidan rolled his eyes, like they were going to bother paying the delivery guy that was going to be eaten. That is, if anyone bothered to show. They've killed so many from almost all the closest delivery places they probably wouldn't even risk sending another one. That or they'd try sending another shinobi like the last one that was still digesting in Zetsu's gut. **(J: Don't ask, too complicated.)**

Takisha squirmed and wiggled, Kenzie did the same, only she was sitting on the floor and was fighting with Kakuzu's tentacles. Pulling with all her strength Kenzie growled," Can't you get me with your evil scheme TOMORROW?!"

"Let me think…No." Kakuzu replied while lifting Kenzie off the ground so she hung upside down. He smirked behind his mask when Kenzie's face turned red from the blood rushing to her head. It added to her very angry glare she was giving him.

Clapping his hands together Deidara smiled and announced," Okay, time to get to work, un. Kisame, hand me my equipment, un." Holding out his hand Deidara's smile twisted from delighted to pure evil. (Also, a dark shadow went over his eyes and they turned into those little diamonds.)

Takisha and Kenzie exchanged looks that said, 'Oh my fucking God!' Takisha expected Kisame to hand a trap loaded with explosive clay, only he didn't. He handed an actual artist's pallet with paints on it to Deidara. Confused Takisha asked," Paints? Since when do you ever paint? You love playing with playdoh."

"It's not playdoh, un! It's artisans clay! It has no colour, un! Now stop talking or you'll ruin my masterpiece, un." Deidara snapped while at the same time walking up the wall and onto the ceiling so he stood right in front of Takisha…upside down. **(K: But…Won't the paints drip onto the floor. Gravity does exsist in their dimension, regardless of their wall and water walking. J: He's using chakra enfused paints. Just for this occasion…And another reason. T: What other reason? "Suspicious glare." J: You'll see in just a moment. T: Then for whatever is about to happen. I hate you. J: I love you too. "Smiles.")**

Takisha's eye twitched when Deidara dipped his index finger in the red blob of paint. Squirming around vigorously she growled," You are not painting my face! Especially with those grubby fingers! AGH!! That paint burns!!! What's in that paint?!" Regardless of her squirming Deidara still managed to get his finger on Takisha's cheek.

Proud of the first mark made upon his 'easel' Deidara replied happily," There's chakra in the paint, un. And this way the paint will not be effected by soap, lotion, sweat or any other remover you can think of, un. That burning sensation is the chakra going through the paint and into your skin, un. So even if the paint does come off, the colour will still be there, un. Isn't it a great idea, un?"

When Takisha and Kenzie screamed, "No!" the guys all cheered "Yes!" Approved or disapproved Deidara didn't care, he continued to finger piant on his moving canvas.

Kenzie watched in horror (and slight amusement) as Deidara turned Takisha's face into an abstract disaster consisting of red, pink, green and yellow. **(T: Why is he marring my face with only those colours? J: Because Kakuzu is too cheap to buy any other colours. K: Let me guess. The paint came from a child's store where they are originally sold for paint by number pictures? J: Yes, actually that's exactly what happened. How'd you know? K: That was just a wild guess. J: Some guess. T: My faaaace!! "Crying") **When Deidara stepped back he put a finger to his chin and tilted his head to the side. After a minute of just standing like this he asked everyone," So, what do you think, un? I didn't have much to work with, un."

Deidara turned around to see that the guys had left. They'd gotten bored waiting for Deidara to finish his 'living master piece.' An angry mark on his head he turned to the now wall pinned Kenzie. **(K: What?! When did this happen?! J: Well, Deidara was so immersed in his art work that he didn't notice when the guys decided to leave. They then had to decide whether or not you should be dragged along or be left behind. They chose to leave you…pinned so Deidara could carry out with the rest of the double trap. K: D8 WHAT IS THE DOUBLE TRAP?!?! TELL ME!!! J: "Raises eyebrow" You honestly think I'll tell you? K: "Grump/ desperate" J: You'll find out in a second.)**

Since she was the only other person present Deidara asked," What do you think, un? If I approve of your statement, I might just let you go, un."

"…Uh… I don't know what to say." Kenzie replied on the verge of having a mental breakdown. She wanted to tell Deidara that Takisha's face looked like a Picasso painting fell on it, then an elephant used it for a welcome matt. But if she told Deidara that he wouldn't let her down. Not to mention that Takisha wouldn't cook for her anymore. **(T: Like I would cook for ANYONE after all this!)**

Deidara made a face of 'That's not what I wanted to hear.' Sighing he said," Fine, un. Be unhelpful to me, un. I'll just have to start on my next art project, un. This time I'm using these chakra enfused markers, instead of paint, un. So what should I make you look like, un?" He'd reached into his cloak pockets and pulled out a black, blue, and orange permanent marker.

" Hey! You finished destroying my face, so let me down now!!" Takisha yelled in a voice that warned of mass destruction about to ensue.

Deidara felt a sudden spike in her energy, to himself he thought,' It must be the curse mark, un. The one name Tsunade didn't do a very good job of sealing it, un. Better make sure she doesn't snap, un. Kakuzu and Hidan said she's more of a headache when it covers her body.' To Takisha he said," Yeah, yeah. Just give me a moment, un. I don't know how this stupid thing is suppose to work, un." Head tilted to the side Deidara tried to remember what Kakuzu said to do in order to make the mechanism release. He'd been too busy thinking about what to paint on Takisha's face to pay attention.

Possibly two minutes went on in silence, at the three minute mark Kenzie gave up on Deidara's blonde brain. Knowing she'd regret it later Kenzie pulled her arm against the kunai. She felt her skin cut open at the same time her shirt sleeve ripped, biting back squeaks of anguish she used her free bleeding arm to pull the other kunais out of the wall. (Deidara was so deep in thought he didn't hear them hit the ground.)

As quietly as she could she tip toed for the door, only to be yelled at," Mackenzie Lynn Bishop! You better not be leaving me by myself! You either help the idiot artist get me out, or be nice and wait for me to get down!"

Takisha was well aware that neither possibility would happen. She really only started yelling so Deidara would notice Kenzie getting away. **(J: You figure out it was originally Kenzie's idea? T: Yup K: So you sick the human threesome after me? T: Why not? You just let him decorate my face. K: But … But… J: She does have a very good point Kenzie. K: "Grump")**

"Where do you think you're going, un?" Deidara asked, his attention fully on Kenzie he made a show of reaching for his little pouch of explosive clay.

Not bothering to say anything Kenzie smiled, then made a mad dash for the door. She was a mere step away from freedom when Deidara appeared in front of her with his arms open. Since she was traveling at such a fast velocity it was impossible to dodge or stop. Deidara happily embraced Kenzie when she flew into him, nuzzling his face against her chest (remember the height difference) he cooed," Aww, did you want a hug Kenzie? Then you just should have asked, un."

"NO! LET ME GO YOU FUCKING PERVERT!! AUGH! TAKISHA HELP ME!!" So startled and angry Kenzie forgot about Takisha's own current position.

Looking over and seeing Takisha's emotionless face she remembered. Sweat dropping Kenzie quickly amended," Right, your in no spot to help. GET OFF OF ME!! RAWR!! UH…K- KISAME!!"

'BANG' Miraculously Kisame heard Kenzie, and being the gentleman he is he couldn't ignore a woman's plea for help. **(J: Plus we all know he has a soft spot for Kenzie. K: "Angry blush" T: At least the person she likes is around. "Puffs out cheeks." J: Aww, are you getting Lee sick Takisha? T: It's already been, what… two weeks? J: Um…actually more like three I think. I can kinda understand. K: What? You starting to get weepy from not seeing Gaara? J: N-no, I miss him, but not desperately missing him. That only happens after a month or so. Then I start getting weepy AND needy. T: I give you another week. K: I give her a few more days. At most. Who knows how long it'll be with Itachi constantly trying to molest her. T: Hm, forgot about the Itachi factor. If you think about it, the sexual harassment is an enhancer of the emotions. K: Right, so depending on how often she gets molested , she'll be crying for Gaara in no time. J: You are aware you started talking about me like I'm not even here, right? T,K:……Sure, we did that on purpose. J: Liars.)**

Kisame had smashed through the wall and clobbered Deidara in the face all in one fluent motion. Holding his hands over his rebroken nose Deidara yelled," What was dat bor?! I bas only hugging her you jerk!!"

Swinging Samehada off his back Kisame grabbed Deidara by the shirt collar and dragged him out into the hall where they couldn't be heard or seen. Though Deidara didn't seem to care if they were over heard. Takisha and Kenzie clearly heard him yelling at whatever Kisame said," …No way, un. Leader-sama said no one can claim, un!...I don't care about your plans, un. It's free for all unless Leader-sama says otherwise, un. … Screw you, un! I just had a perfect opportunity that you just messed up, un! Help yourself, un!" After that they came back into the room, Deidara looking like a sour grape had lodged itself in his mouth and Kisame looked ready to hole up in the lake with his pet shark.

Rubbing her arms Kenzie thought to herself, 'My blood went cold from whatever conversation they just had. What kind of plans were they talking about?! WHY DO I ALWAYS OVER HEAR STUFF LIKE THIS?!?! LAST TIME WE GOT KIDNAPPED AFTER WHAT I HEARD!!' Takisha noticed the arm rubbing and asked," What, getting cold? You can take my place. This bed trap is nice and cozy."

"Thanks, but no thanks. Oh, hey, Kisame? Do you know how to undo the trap? The blonde airhead wasn't paying attention to the release instructions." Kenzie asked, pointing to the bed with Takisha's rosy cheeked head poking out of the fold in the middle.

Kisame rolled his beady little fish eyes and went over to the trap. He put his hand on the mattress facing him and pat it twice with charka on his fingertips. With a loud creaking groan the bed unfolded, allowing Takisha to lay down and sigh in relief. The confinement strength of the bed must have been quite strong, her fingers and toes had a tinge of blue to them. Laying still Takisha wheezed," You have no idea how nice it feels to be on my back right now." **(K: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID! ROFL. J: I knew you'd get that one. T: Why'd you make me sound so dirty? J: Cause you were in the perfect position for it. K: "Rolling on floor laughing" THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!! HAHAHAHA!! J: xD T: "Glare" J: I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist! T: This bracket moment ends now.)**

Deidara pointed to Kenzie and huffed," Kisame you owe me, un. Hold her still so I can draw on her face, un."

Kisame looked over at Kenzie, Kenzie glared and shook her head. Kisame shrugged and poofed over behind Kenzie and grabbed her in a behind bear hug. Because of the height difference between them Kisame's arms ended up a centimeter above Kenzie's chest. Blushing bright red she growled," Excuse me!" Kisame bent down and whispered in her ear," They can stay there, or they could be lower. Your choice."

"Fine. But don't let him touch me with his hands." Kenzie grumbled while glaring at Deidara who was smiling quite happily.

Raising the black marker Deidara said," Just a second, un. I need to take care of a loose end, un." Since his back was to Takisha, she didn't see him take out multiple kunai and wire. Tying one end of the wire to one kunai, then the other to another he called over his shoulder," Hold still Takisha, un!"

"Huh? WHAT THE HELL?! You bastard! Wasn't messing up my face good enough?!" Takisha screeched when Deidara spun around and threw the kunai so they went into the bed on either side of Takisha. Allowing the wire to hold her down. **(T: So I went from being trapped to being pinned. J: Yeah, pretty much. K: You're balancing the torture scale, right? J: That is correct. T: …Fair is fair I guess…It really sucks though. K: Doesn't it?)**

Kenzie (having arm movement still) pointed to what Deidara had just done and asked," And you did that, why?"

Smiling still Deidara replied," I want to…enjoy, my art after I'm done with you, un. Kisame knows what I'm talking about, un." The way Deidara had said all this made a chill go down Kenzie's spin, and Takisha's har stood up on end.

"As long as you don't touch me again, I don't care what you do." Kenzie informed Deidara, earning a nasty glare from Takisha that clearly said 'I'll see you go hungry for the next month you evil traitor!!' Kenzie cried on the inside, on the outside she made a face that responded, 'Sorry, but it's either you or me.'

After that her view of Takisha was blocked by Deidara and his markers. It was very hard to hold still when a perverted blonde man that had not but a moment ago molested you. Kenzie did what she could, though it was more amusing to move and get yelled at by Deidara. (Kisame got a kick out of making Kenzie's whole body move when Deidara had his marker poised at the perfect spot.)

Due to her constant fidgeting moments, Kenzie's face drawing lasted twice as long as Takisha's. **(J: During which time Takisha tried to get out of the wire trap. Only resulting in cuts from the wire. T: Oww. "Sniff")** The final product of Deidara's hard (frustrating) work was Kenzie's face looking like a clown that got thrown up on by that ate black, blue and orange candy canes. Kisame let go of her (reluctantly) and stood beside Deidara… For one second before collapsing on the floor in laughter. Puffing out her cheeks she grumbled," My face is a mess. Now I'm going to go eat something. Deidara, if marker gets on my food and I eat it and get sick, I'll kill you." Deidara rolled his eyes and turned around to smile at Takisha.

Takisha froze in the midst of her struggling and gulped. There was an undeniable sparkle of perverted mayhem in the corner of Deidara's eye. Looking past Deidara to Kenzie with tears in her eyes she cried out in desperation," KENZIE!! HELP ME!! PLEASE!!"

"Uh, sorry, but I'm too hungry for any rescue attempts right now. Plus, you need a good dose of harassment after all the messed up crap Jenna and I have been through." Kenzie replied slightly sympathetic while backing up out the door at the same time.

Kisame gave Takisha a little wave of farewell while heading out behind Kenzie. Deidara's pervy fingers wiggled teasingly as he approached, in a last desperate attempt at salvation Takisha squeaked," You won't really let everyone else see you be fully perverted will you? Konan will definitely give you a harsh beating if she walks by and sees this."

"Hmm, good point, un. Be right back." Deidara then poofed out of the room and poofed right back. Only he held a massive bag of clay. Takisha was confused for a second before she noticed the words 'Non-explosive' on the outside of the bag. Sweat dropping she asked," Let me guess. You're going to fill the hole in my wall with the clay that doesn't explode so you won't utterly destroy my room the next time you detonate one of your smaller creations."

" Good for you, you figured it out without me even saying anything, un. Now as soon as I get this wall patched up I'll have my fun, un." Deidara said to Takisha as if she were a four year old. While Deidara got to work on the wall, tears streamed down Takisha's painted face. **(J: As amusing as everything is, I'm sure you're all aware that something must have happened with Jenna in the kitchen during all this fun. So let's rewind the clock to see what happened! K: You sound…weird. Don't talk like that anymore. J: Talk like what? T: Like some kind of talk show host or something. J: Oh, okay…And if the writing style changes in anyway it's because my grandma is watching a soap opera. K: Those are always fun to watch. J: Yeah, really.)**

**Back in Time with Jenna –**

"Please let it be empty. Please let it be empty…THANK YOU!!" Jenna cried out in relief when she poked her head into the kitchen and found it empty.

Skipping to the fridge she opened the door and groaned. Putting her head against the freezer door above her grumbled," None of the jerks are here, and they still ruin my appetite. Though I'm sure Zetsu didn't intend for me to find his lovely bucket of left overs." Upon opening the fridge Jenna had found a small bucket with an arm and several toes in it. To add to the delicious sight the bucket had blood in it to marinade the parts.

Closing the fridge door Jenna sighed and went over to the cupboard to get a cup. Opening the door she nearly screamed in frustration. To be real assholes to the shorter members of the group Kisame, Kakuzu, and Hidan had moved all the cups and bowls to the back of the second shelf and up onto the higher shelves. **(K: It would really only hinder you and Deidara. T: I think that's who they were aiming to piss off. J: Kinda figured. Bastards.) **What irked her the most was that the only cup she preferred to use was put on the very, very top shelf. **(K: Explanation for cup preference? J: I wash it out myself. T:…Smart. K: I don't get it. J: You don't need to.) **Making sure to stomp her feet like a terrible five year old Jenna went to the table and grabbed a chair. Putting it in front of the cupboard she pulled herself up on the seat. Only to find she was STILL too short! Gritting her teeth she reached up on tip toe and stretched for the green porcelain mug with the flower print. Her fingertips were just grazing the handle when the chair was kicked out from under her and she went flying backwards into someone's arms.

Taking deep breathes to stop from having a panic attack Jenna wheezed," What the hell was that for?!"

"Because I fucking can, you have a problem with that?" Hearing Hidan, Jenna went still for a moment in order to decide on how to handle this development. The last Hidan Hunt felt like eons ago, and since they'd gotten there she'd been harassed mainly by Itachi.

Having composed her thoughts Jenna remarked plainly, " Yes I do, just as I have a problem with certain tall people putting the dishes up too high for me to reach!" Hidan realized that Jenna didn't remember whose arms she was in.

Deciding to refresh her memory he gave Jenna a very, very tight squeeze and growled (almost seductively) in her ear," Aww, too bad. But maybe if you'd stop being so fucking annoying certain things such as dish relocation and totalm molestation wouldn't happen to you." At the remark of total molestation Jenna froze and stopped breathing. **(T: For those who are confused "glances at Kenzie" Hidan just told her that she'd lose her clothes in the kitchen if she didn't smarten up. And if you forgot, Hidan is not wearing any clothing…I think…He might have put something on, but hard to say. Anyways, you get the point.)**

Relaxing his hold Hidan patted Jenna on the head and said in amusement," HA! I can't believe Itachi has you broken in so well already!!"

At that remark Jenna kicked into Itachi-Self-Defense mode, squirming and thrashing she yelled," Itachi has not broken me! I am not a horse to be reined in you jack ass!! Now let me go!!" With all her thrashing Jenna managed to get out of Hidan's hold and get on her feet. Being quick she backed up towards the door and kept her sights on the now smirking Hidan.

Jenna assumed he was smirking because he was about to pull an Itachi and molest her, but he was actually smirking because Itachi was behind her. Cocking his head he asked snidely," Are you saying you're mentally stronger than Itachi?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying! He's mangekyoed me and sexually harassed me to no ends. And I'm still able to talk to other people without sounding like a lunatic… Most of the time." Jenna had brazenly said all this with her hands on her hips.

Hidan's smirk morphed from cocky to highly expectant. This threw Jenna off guard until an arm snaked around her waist and Itachi said," I'm sure we can fix that in the next hour or two."

Tweaking out Jenna fought to get Itachi's arm off her body while crying in despair," AHHHHHH!! HIDAN YOU JACK ASS!! I HOPE YOU ENJOY ETERNAL DAMNATION WHEN YOU FINALLY DIE!!! AND I KNOW YOU WILL, THE AUHTOR HAS ALREADY DECIDED IT!!" She finished this by waving a fist until she couldn't see Hidan anymore.

Even though she couldn't be seen, Hidan could still hear Jenna's desperate yelling," Come on Itachi, we both know you're stronger both mentally and physically!! I was only saying that so Hidan would stop being a jerk! I DIDN'T MEA-" 'SLAM!' went Itachi's bedroom door. Unable to resist Hidan quickly grabbed a cup of tea and scurried over to Itachi's door.

Along the way he crossed paths with Kenzie, causing him to break down in the hallway in hysterics. Holding a hand to his stomach he gasped," Oh my Jashin!! BWAHAHAH!!! I haven't fucking laughed this hard in ages! This is just too fucking much! First Spots and now this?! BWAHAHAH!!!"

" I know my face is bad, but that's Deidara's doing. Now what happened to Jenna? Because I just left Takisha to be raped by Deidara." Kenzie said all this bluntly. **(J: Kenzie is like Sam from 'iCarly' when she's hungry. She stops caring about other people and only cares about herself. K: SPENCER! EQUALS! LOVE!! J,T: YES!!)**

" WHAT?! This is not fair! I can't listen in on both! AUGH, FUCK! Crazy Face, take this scroll, unroll it and slip it in the room with Cammando Barbie. I don'y want to miss anything!" Hidan took a scroll out his cloak, unrolled it, bit his thumb to draw blood, then wrote some kanjis on it. Rolling it back up he shoved it against Kenzie's chest and pushed her backwards.

Standing where she stopped she whined," I'm hungry, I'm going to get food. THEN I will put the scroll under the door to satisfy your dark needs. Now move."

Glaring at her as she went Hidan thought, ' Wonder if she'll scream when she sees – ' 'THUD!' 'Nope, she fainted. And foams at the mouth, very nice.' Kenzie now lay on her back with her arm twitching and foam bubbling from her mouth. Seeing as the fridge door was open Hidan had no choice but to go close it. He made sure to step on Kenzie's solar plexus though, causing her to swallow and choke on some foam. Laughing evilly Hidan closed the fridge and said to Kenzie," That's what you get for not doing as your told by your elders bitch!"

" 'Cough' Right, I forgot 'cough' that you're an old man that needs 'cough' 'cough' his diaper changed every so often. 'Cough' If you'd like I can go get Kakuzu to do that now. 'Cough' " Kenzie retorted the best she could through a fit of coughing. Like a vicious dog Hidan's upper lip curled up to show his pearly whites. He also growled before giving Kenzie a kick to the side.

Holding her soar side she watched as Hidan walked away, right as he was about to leave the kitchen Kenzie yelled after him," A kick to my ribs doesn't mean you deny wearing diapers!!"

Spinning around Hidan screamed," THAT'S IT! I'M SACRIFICING YOUR ASS RIGHT NOW!!"

Pain momentarily forgotten Kenzie got on her feet and ran for her life with Hidan two steps behind her. **(K: J-Jenna! What if he catches me?! J: Don't worry, he won't catch you. T: Right, fanfic writer controls all. H: Do we need to repeat the Halloween chapter? K: NO! Jenna don't give him the pen and notebook. J: Don't worry, I won't. H: Yoink! Who said anything about ****giving**** me the notebook? T: Get it back! Before -)**

As fast as she tried to run Mackenzie could not outrun Hidan. In one fell swoop Hidan brought Mackenzie down to her knees. She'd been focusing on getting ahead, making it easy for Hidan to bring out his scythe and slash the tendons in the back of her legs. Tears streaming down her face she yelled," You fucking asshole, that really hurts!! You could have done permanent damage!!!"

" I'm about to do something permanent right now!" Grabbing hold of Mackenzie by the scruff of her shirt Hidan proceeded to drag her down the hallway.

Along the way they passed the room Deidara and Takisha were in. Mackenzie's eyes widened to hear Takisha's muffled petrified screaming. For Deidara was leaving the room after shoving explosive clay in her mouth. Mackenzie nearly fainted once more when Deidara detonated the clay and blew Takisha's head all over the room.

Her remaining sanity and consciousness left her when they passed Itachi's room with the door open. Itachi had lost control of his sharigan and sent Jenna into pure insanity. She'd grabbed one of Itachi's kunais and cut her fingers and toes off, and was proceeding to decapitate herself while Itachi stood by and watched with a smile on his face. **(J: GOT IT!! "Steals notebook back from Hidan and reads over what was written"… You are one sick twisted asshole, you know that? K,T: "Hugging each other in absolute fear." H: Yeah, whatever. But don't think that's not the last time I'll get a hold of that notebook. "Poofs away" T: Never let Hidan, or any of the others get their hands on that notebook again Jenna! J: Yes, yes, I promise. "Scratching out Hidan's writing." I'll sleep with it under my pillow if that makes you feel better. K: Sleep with it, eat with it, hell shower with it too! Never let it leave your sights. Otherwise we are all dead!)**

Making a quick left turn down the hallway Kenzie managed to run into Konan. Being smart Kenzie zipped behind Konan and cried," Hidan's trying to sacrifice me again!"

Hidan turned the corner to find Konan with her arms crossed, seeing Kenzie cowering behind her he figured what was coming. "Hidan, you know just like everyone else that killing the girls is not allowed. So don't even think about sacrificing her. Understand? And Kenzie, try and keep your mouth shut to stop any provocations for death, okay?" Konan seemed to find all this like a family situation where she was the mom and Kenzie and Hidan were brother and sister. **(K: Gag!)**

Hidan rolled his eyes and gave up. Walking away he grumbled to himself," If it weren't for these stupid rules I'd be making Jashin very happy these days." As he walked away Kenzie made sure to stick her tongue out at Hidan's back.

Looking back at Kenzie over her shoulder Konan asked," Kenzie, where are the other girls? I would have thought you'd be with them for safety reasons."

"As I understand it, Takisha is probably being molested and/or raped by Deidara. And Jenna is being 'disciplined' by Itachi." Kenzie replied simply as if she were being asked any old question.

Sweat dropping Konan sighed," How about we be good friends and go help them out?"

"But I want to get something to eat… That's not from the fridge." Kenzie whined, for not even severed limbs in a bucket of blood can throw away Kenzie's appetite.

Gently grabbing Kenzie's arm Konan easily dragged Kenzie towards Itachi's bedroom. They couldn't hear anything wron immediately, then," OH! MY! FUCKING! GOD! WHAT DID YOU DO?!?!"

That was enough for Konan to knock on the door and call out," Itachi, open the door. I need to ask Jenna something."

There was another prolonged silence before they heard Itachi start to undo all ten of the locks on his door. Once they were all released the door opened onto an almost frightening scene. Jenna stood with her back to one mirror and she was facing another. In the mirror she was looking at, it showed her bare back with Itachi's name tattooed on it. Only it looked more like he did it with a kunai covered in ink. Tears streaming down her face she shrieked," That's it!! You're dead!! I'm going to kill you!!" This time it wasn't just an empty threat.

Jenna grabbed hold of the closest weapon (a katana) and charged at Itachi with it. Itachi had expected some reaction or other, but not a full frontal attack. He had a flash from the first week of classes where Jenna had jumped over the desks to try and attack Kisame then. She was half a metre away when Itachi noticed that Jenna's eyes had absolutely hardened. Eyes of absolute hatred. He was so focused on her eyes he didn't notice Jenna had actually sliced a mark across his right cheek and shoulder. (The katana was dull and was going to be sharpened that night.)

She would have continued on with a fatal stab to his stomach if Konan hadn't jumped in and grabbed Jenna's hair to yoink her back. Dropping the katana Jenna screamed at the top of her lungs," YOU WILL DIE ITACHI! AS LONG AS I'M ALIVE YOU WILL DIE YOUNG!!! LET ME GO KONAN!!"

Konan struggled fruitlessly to keep Jenna restrained within her arms. Looking to Kenzie for help she found Kenzie had her hands over her mouth with eyes the size of saucers. Kenzie noticed Konan's desperate/ confused expression she said dramatically," I was picturing Gaara's reaction when he finds out. I got total world destruction. Worse than what you guys could ever do… That seemed to do something. Try saying his name a lot." Kenzie pointed to the not-so-crazily-struggling Jenna.

"What? Um… Gaara? Gaara. Gaaaaarrrrraaaaa." Konan watched astoundedly as Gaara's name alone slowly calmed Jenna down, then put her straight to sleep.

Everyone stood in awkward silence for a moment, Kenzie broke it by saying," Wow, she is truly pathetic if his name alone can pacify her… Now I have to see what Lee's name does to Takisha." Konan gave a small nod, she would also be interested to see that.

Kenzie glanced over at Itachi and saw that he looked almost truly annoyed. Thinking about it for a second Kenzie asked while pointing at Itachi," I wonder what would happen if we said his name now?"

"Let's not try that yet. We still need to make sure Takisha's okay. But first I'll put Jenna in her room, go ahead without me." Fixing her position so Konan held Jenna bridal style she poofed away to Jenna's room.

Kenzie scratched her head and grumbled," I'll go there, only Konan's opening the door. I don't need to be scarred by a porn scene." Itachi waited until Kenzie was out of the doorway before slamming his door shut and doing up the ten locks again. Kenzie shrugged noncaringly and toddled off back to the clay filled bedroom.

At the same time Kenzie walked up to Takisha's bedroom Konan was just about to open the door. Running up behind her Kenzie hissed," Did you knock or anything first?"

"No, but I just heard Takisha scream. That's enough of an invitation for me." Konan replied seriously without looking away from the door. Luckily for Takisha's door it was unlocked, so Konan didn't need to use additional force and kick the door open.

Flinging the door open Konan yelled," Diedara whatever you're doing to Takisha, it ends now!! UGH! Starting with putting your clothes back on." Putting a hand over her eyes Konan deliberately blocked Kenzie's view.

Before Konan stepped in front of Kenzie she managed to get a glimpse of what had been going on. The horror consisted of an almost completely naked Deidara sitting on top of Takisha and he was just about to start taking her clothes off. Once Konan stepped in front of her Kenzie thought in relief, 'That image shouldn't haunt me tonight. Can't say the same for Takisha though.'

From beyond Konan Kenzie heard Deidara whine," That's not fair, un! I just finished bitching at Kisame for this!! The girls are free game as long as we use protection, Leader-sama said this during the first week they were here, un. Now shut the door and let me finish, un!!"

Either Takisha had passed out or was gagged, whatever the reason Takisha didn't say anything in her defense. Deciding to be the good friend Kenzie yelled at Deidara," Sorry, but it's getting late and I'm hungry. So let her go and she can make supper. During the night you can go after her undisturbed again." When there came no response again Kenzie figured Takisha was unconscious due to force or rapid blood loss from exposure of Deidara's buff body. **(Dei: "Standing in nothing but boxers." T: Three K: Two J: One..Cue the rabid fangirls. "Swarms of Deidara crazy fangirls come out of nowhere and attack Deidara, who is smiling from ear to ear." T: And I wouldn't get a nosebleed from Deidara's sexy body. J,K: "Raise eyebrows." T: What? K: Did you not hear what you just said? T: Huh? J: "Clears throat" And I quote ' And I wouldn't get a nose bleed from Deidara's sexy body.' T: D- Did I say that? K,J: "Nods" T: My God what is wrong with me? J: "Shrugs" Hormones? T: I hate hormones?)**

"Fine, un. I'm going to hold you to what you just said, un….(grumbling) Alright, I'm clothed, un. Now wake her up so she can get cooking, un." Deidara bitched like a teenager on her monthly.

Konan pushed past the reclothed Deidara and went to Takisha. Taking out a freshly sharpened kunai Konan made sure to cut the wire in a way that it couldn't whip lash and cut Takisha any more than she'd already managed to cut herself. Once the wire was off she helped Takisha to sit up. That didn't wake her up, nor did Kenzie slapping her across the face. Deidara watched their result less attempts for another moment before asking," Can I try something, un? I promise I'm not going to rape her, un."

Konan gave him a skeptic glare when she replied," You try anything I don't approve of, an I get to slap you senseless."

"I get to take part in that right?" Kenzie asked hopefully with an eager smile on her face. Konan shook her head, making Kenzie frown in disappointment.

Clapping his hands together Deidara said almost joyfully," Alright, I've always wanted to try this on someone, un. I can't wait to see how she reacts." Standing in front of Takisha he placed both hands over top of her ears. Nothing happened at first, then in the next second…

"AAAAAUUGGGHHH!!! THAT FELT SOOOOO GROSS! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU DEIDARA!!" Takisha's eyes had flown open and she'd also flown off the bed rubbing her ears vigorously.

Konan looked at Deidara with a raised eyebrow. Deidara answered her question by holding up his hands to show the tongued hanging out, smiling in great amusement he snickered," The ultimate wet willy, un. It worked too."

"COME HERE SO I CAN TIE THOSE TONGUE TOGETHER!!" Takisha screamed while chasing the laughing Deidara out of the room and down the hallways.

Shaking her head Konan turned to Kenzie and asked," What do you feel like getting for take out?" **(J: And that ends this insane chapter. I would make it insanely long and keep going so it connects with the other stuff originally written, but I gotta make sure you guys can read everything in one sitting. K: But long chapters are fun. T: Yeah! J: Sorry, already ended it! And the disclaimer request system is still in play my beloved readers :3)**


	11. Itachi's Training Program

**J: Alrighty! Look, I updated sooner than last time :D**

**T: Not funny.**

**J: Heh, I know. But still, I know you peoplez are happy that it's updated anyways.**

**K: ..."grump"....**

**T: Something wrong Kenzie?**

**K: "Glares at Jenna"**

**J: Lol, she's just pissed cause she gets in so many..."predicaments" in the chapter :3**

**T: Oh well, you'll live. **

**K: "Grump, grump, grump." At least the disclaimer will make me feel better.**

**T: Eh?**

**J: 0.0...I totally forgot....**

**It: "Poofs up behind Jenna" Boo.**

**J: EEEK! "Runs"**

**K: :3**

**T: I take it you're disclaiming Itachi?**

**It: Yes, under the request from Naruto'sSisterandItachi'sGirl.**

**J: "Glaring from behind furniture she hid behind last chapter" Just do the disclaimer and leave already.**

**It: Jenna does not own any of the Naruto people named, nor does she own a certain screaming part about rollie pollies, that belongs to the producer/screen writers of 'iCarly' "Poofs over behind Jenna again and scoops her up"**

**J: 0.e PUT ME DOOWWWNNN! "Is taken away by Itachi"**

**T: "Sweat drop"**

**K: 8D**

**

* * *

**

Chapter Ten – Itachi's Training Program.

The kitchen was filled with the rude sound of noodles being slurped and eaten. As well as the odd muttering here and there about the food being crappy, about anyone they killed and ate (Zetsu) and of course about Takisha and Kenzie's lovely new makeovers. (Pretty much everyone.)

Pein waited until everyone had eaten most of their food before standing up and clearing his throat. Everyone quieted down to hear about a new mission to get them out of the hell hole. Eyes all on him Pein started off," I have a few short things to say, then everyone can do what they were doing earlier… Except for you Deidara. You're removing your art work off the girls' faces before you do anything else. And we're missing someone. Where's Jenna?"

"She's sleeping in her room. She tweaked balls on Itachi then passed out." Kenzie answered around a mouthful of fried rice.

Tobi raised his hand and offered," Tobi can be a good boy and go get her for you Leader-san!"

"No, that's not necessary. Takisha and Mackenzie can inform her of everything later. Girls, your marks and notes from your teammates are, I guess you could say, absolute, one hundred percent epic failure. So starting tomorrow I'm putting Itachi in charge of your physical training, and Sasori is in charge of individual training. Time and placement are solely up to those two. And starting next week, you will start taking part in minor operations. To everyone else, your normal missions and operations will resume the week after next week. That's about everything I wanted to say. Now continue doing whatever the hell you've been doing for the past few hours." Pein finished talking, grabbed up his remaining food then poofed back to his chamber of solitude.

There was momentary silence, then everyone continued slurping and eating and now bitching.

Takisha was just about finished her ramen when Kakuzu asked to anyone," So, did the runt really get Itachi? 'Cause I'm having a really hard time picturing it."

Putting down her chopsticks Kenzie replied," Oh yeah, you should have seen her. It was quite hysterical actually. She grabbed the nearest thing and spazzed out on Itachi, the fact that she drew blood was just an incredible miracle of life and luck."

"You're making it sound like an epic battle, un." Deidara commented dryly while breaking his chopsticks in half for the second time.

"You're just jealous 'cause she did what you never could." Kisame snickered, intentionally saying the one thing that was a sore spot for Deidara.

Instead of saying anything in his defense Deidara started glaring and flicking chopstick pieces at the grinning Kisame. Kisame in return fire started flicking clumps of rice. Some of the rice managed to hit Hidan, who then started flinging the remainder of his plum sauce covered chicken balls. Of course, a spoon can't be reliably used for a catapult. One of his chicken balls went off course and splashed down in Kakuzu's mug of tea. Resulting in tea getting on his hand. Leering at Hidan he picked up a handful of the broccoli he didn't eat and just straight out threw it at him. Tobi, being the man with a child's heart, couldn't resist joining. Only he went beyond what was expected and started throwing pies at everyone. **(T: Where did Tobi get the pies? To: Tobi keeps a stash of pies in his room for sweet emergencies just like this! T:…Would Tobi be nice and share a pie with his three friends every now and then? To: Of course Takisha-chan! But only Takisha-chan, Jenna-chan, and Kenzie-chan can have some. No one else, not even Deidara-sempai. K: Thank you Tobi! I love you! To: YAY! Tobi got a girl to say she loves Tobi before Deidara-sempai did! J: You be a good boy and make sure to rub that in Deidara's face, okay? To: Okay! "Poofs away to do so.")**

Hiding beneath the table Takisha and Kenzie did their best to avoid getting hit by anymore stray food projectiles. Her hands over her head to help protect her hair Takisha whispered," I don't know about you, but I'm going to make a run for Jenna's room. We need to tell her about the extra training starting tomorrow."

"You can go, I'm staying here. Do you know how often an actual food fight can happen in someone's life? I might never see something this awesome again!" Kenzie whispered back excitedly. She'd been poking her head out every few seconds to see what was happening. Takisha noticed that each time she came back under the table some little food or other got snagged in her hair. At that current moment her hair had rice, a piece of chopstick and a small bit of broccoli in her hair. She couldn't wait to hear what Kenzie said about that when she had to clean it. **(K: I can assure you that nothing nice will be said.)**

Poking her own head up over the table to see what was happening Takisha said reassuringly to Kenzie," Something tells me this isn't their first, nor their last food fight Kenzie. So come with me before Tobi shoves pies in our faces." Slightly frowning Kenzie conceded and followed after Takisha out of the war zone.

**In Jenna's Room –**

'Knock' 'knock' 'knock' "JENNA!! We're coming in!!" Takisha announced before opening Jenna's bedroom door and marching into the room.

Approaching her bed they heard Jenna mumble," I'm up, with a headache. What did I miss for supper?" Since the cave had some source of lighting **(J: They have lights throughout the cave. How they get the electricity is beyong my comprehension.) **they could see that Jenna had been flipping around in her bed, her hair was a hysterical mess.

Snickering Kenzie replied," Just some take-out, 'snort', nice hair by the way." Kenzie made a demonstration of how Jenna's hair looked by making her hands rise off her head, accompanied by a sound effect noise of 'POOF.'

A smile on her face Takisha added on," As well, Leader told us, that starting tomorrow Itachi will be helping us with physical training, and Sasori will help us with individual training. Doesn't that sound like fun?"

As expected Jenna's eye twitched profusely, pulling the blankets up over her head she cried," Whyyyy?! Why does Leader hate me so much?! He knows Itachi wants to rape me!! I'm going back to sleep! Never wake me up again!!!" There came no further whimper, whines, or sniffles after that.

Shrugging at each other Takisha and Kenzie left their woe begotten friend to her silent misery. When they got out in the hallway Kenzie commented in confusion," I wonder why she didn't tweak out at Weasel-Butt's name."

"Why would she do that? Does it have anything to do with her spazz attack earlier?" Takisha asked, an eyebrow raised. She figured she got it right when Kenzie did a quick check over her shoulder.

Kenzie held a finger up for Takisha to wait until they rounded the corner. Once she thought they were safe she replied almost eagerly," The reason why Jenna spazzed in the first place is because Itachi tattooed his name on Jenna's back. Well, he actually tattooed 'Property of Itachi Uchiha.' But he did in kanjis, so Jenna probably doesn't know that. Anyways, I was hoping she'd tweak out at Weasel-Butt's name since it was Gaara's name that calmed her down."

"Really?...She must really miss him… But since she didn't spazz, do you think it's possible she doesn't remember? She did say her head was hurting." Takisha questioned very seriously. **(J: Like, psychiatrist serious. "Wiggles eyebrows." T: Wtf? Was the eyebrow wiggle really necessary Jenna? J: Sure it was! :D T: I have a hard time in believing that -.-')**

More to herself than Takisha, Kenzie muttered," Hmmm, I wonder what would happen if we reminded her about it?"

"No! Bad Kenzie! You're not making Jenna go ballistic again… Wait for a few days first. That way she has time to either remember, or find out herself. Alright?" Takisha suggested this smartly. She knew that Kenzie would totally forget about it after a few days. Though she wouldn't mind seeing Jenna try and kill Itachi. It'd be less food to cook, and one elss asshole to tolerate. Not to mention no brutal training. But as the good friend out of the three of them, she would sacrifice the chance for these pleasantries and leaver her friend's mind in peace…For a while anyways.

Slouching forward Kenzie sighed and mumbled," Fiiine. But after three days, I get to remind her if she hasn't already remembered or have it pointed out by someone else."

"Good girl. Now I think we should go hole up in our own bedrooms. Otherwise we could still be forced to clean up their mess. And I will not cook anything for breakfast if the kitchen is still a mess tomorrow morning." Takisha huffed while going off to her room and leaving Kenzie to go to hers.

**A Few Minutes Later –**

Takisha, Kenzie, and even Jenna layed in their beds staring up at the ceiling. Sighing all three thought solemnly, ' I wonder what Lee/ Kankuro/ Gaara are doing right now? I hope they manage to find us soon.'

**~ In Konoha ~**

'SLAM!' "We cannot continue to sit around and do nothing! They could be dead by now, or being tortured! I wish to set out at once!" Lee demanded after slamming his hand down on Lady Tsunade's desk.

Shizune and Gai stood to the sides, they trusted that the fifth hokage would hand the situation calmly. Her hands intertwined in front of her Tsunade waited until Lee was breathing calmly again. Meeting his eyes directly she plainly told him," We can't do anything until we have an inkling as to where they're being held. Plus Gaara is in no condition to be going on frivolous searches. He's having a difficult time containing Shukaku. Any emotional fluxuation will lead to destruction. Am I understood Lee?"

Lee bowed his head and muttered a sulky, "Yes ma'm." His proud posture still slack he left the room with Gai behind him.

**~ In Suna ~**

"How's he holding up Kankuro?" Temari asked worriedly, Kankuro had just come out of Gaara's room for the third time that day.

Shaking his unhatted head with his own worried expression he replied," Not very good. He still refuses to eat, and wants no one else to talk to him. Only if we're given news about their whereabouts are we to approach him. Apparently Shukaku is putting up one hell of a fight, that's how upset Gaara is."

"You're not doing much better. You've barely eaten lately, and Crow's been cleaned and polished fifty times in one day. From the dark circles under your eyes, you haven't been sleeping well either, right?" Temari inquired/ demanded. Nothing could get past her super keen Big Sister Eyes. It annoyed both boys to no ends at some points, but other times it was nice not having to explain things.

Nodding his head a little Kankuro grumbled," Just doesn't feel right to go about things normally when Kenzie could be going through hell, you know?"

Giving her younger brother a one armed hug she said," Ya, okay. But at least try to eat and sleep. We could get news about the girls' location at any time and it wouldn't do you any good to be tired and low on energy. Right?"

Kankuro gave another nod and pulled a random chocolate bar out of his pocket. Temari smiled and gave him a pat of comfort.

**~ 5:00 in the morning the next day ~**

Itachi expertly crept into Kenzie's bedroom, sneaking up to the bed he easily yanked the pillow out from under her head. At the same time he placed a miniature alarm clock beside her head, the time set for the alarm was 5:30 am. With Kenzie's pillow in hand he set out to the woods where he had Takisha and Jenna's pillows stashed already.

**~ Half an hour later ~**

'BRRRRIIIINGG!!' Went the three miniature chakra enhanced alarm clocks. Kenzie was sent flying off her bed, Jenna sat up and nearly had a heart attack, and Takisha managed to throw hers all the way across the room to hit the wall. Even after it lost a few pieces the demonic device continued to scream.

Jenna was the first to notice a horrible addition to the damned contraption. There was no off switch, in it's place on the back were the words 'Go to the woods or everyone will wake up and kill you.'

It was a new record for how fast someone could get dressed. First Jenna, then Takisha, and finally Kenzie were running out of the cave with the alarm clocks still screaming away. When they met up with each other outside the barely visible forest Takisha growled," Why do I have the feeling Itachi is behind this? And my missing pillow."

"Ya, he's sadistic and cruel enough to plant eardrum shattering alarm clocks. Though the purpose of stealing our pillows, no idea." Jenna agreed with a yawn.

Kenzie lagged behind the other two as they walked, but her brain was functioning faster than her body. Already glaring she guessed," If I didn't know any better, I'd say he's going to use them for some sort of training purpose. Oh look, I was right. Hey! Weasel Man! What's the idea with the blow-your-brains-out-alarm clocks? A few shakes and a kick or two would have worked."

The girls had walked into a small clearing, and at the far end of it Itachi sat peacefully on the three pillows he'd stolen. His expression showed no sign that he cared about Kenzie's name calling, and to make sure the girls could hear him he snapped his fingers, making the alarm clocks turn off.

To show how unamused she was with Itachi's wake up call idea, Takisha threw hers to the ground and stomped on it. When the hands stopped moving she smiled. When Itachi snapped his fingers again and the alarm clocks blew up in their face, they all glared. Especially Takisha since her foot had been on top of the clock at the time.

"Okay, we get it. We need to stop asking questions, listen and don't do anything else. Now start explaining!" Jenna yelled, her arms crossed to give herself some warmth against the brisk morning air and cold wet dew on the bottom of her legs.

Standing up Itachi made eye contact with all three of them, his voice monotone he said," I've decided that you're better off training in the morning. So from now on, every morning, unless I am away on a mission, you will be woken at 5:30 for training. Any complaints or resistance to this will lead to imminent pain and suffering. As well as Leader revoking the protection law." For some foreboding reason, Jenna felt that last part was to bother her the most. Which it did, but Takisha and Kenzie felt just as frustrated/ infuriated about it.

Stomping her foot Kenzie yelled," We can get up at 5:30 ourselves thanks! Those alarm clocks of ear drum doom can be buried beneath the ground!!"

Itachi reached into his cloak and drew out three of the mentioned alarm clocks. Holding them up he said," You will continue to have alarm clocks placed in your rooms until I run out. Which won't be for a long time yet. Now enough bickering, get 20 laps done around the lake." When the girls didn't immediantly get moving he took out a very large windmill shuriken and prepared to throw it. The girls were gone before he even got in position.

As the girls huffed and puffed while they ran they also cursed Itachi a thousand times over. But only in their minds, if they tried saying anything out loud they would lose valuable breathe for running.

In Takisha's mind – " I'm blaming this solely on Leader, he was the one who decided to put Itachi in charge of our exercise training. Itachi probably wouldn't have bothered otherwise! Ugh, my legs are starting to hurt and we're not even done one lap!!"

In Kenzie's mind – "Just you wait Uchiha, one of these days I'm going to put bleach in your shampoo. No! That's too overdone…Plus it's better to use pink on Deidara. HA! Then I'll bleach out his clothes then turn them into ty-dye master pieces with pink, lots of pink! You can't be a high and mighty prick if you're wearing ty-dyed pink clothes!! Mwahahaha!!!"

In Jenna's mind – " Don't think about what he said, don't think about anything. Just keep running, just keep running. UGH! Stitch! I have a stitch in my side!!! Owww!!"

Itachi watched from the side as Kenzie unknowingly took the lead, Takisha wasn't too far behind her but wasn't putting in an effort to try and keep up. Jenna was way, way, waaay behind. Inwardly sighing he started off behind them.

Since Kenzie was far enough ahead (and Jenna was far enough behind) she caught sight of Itachi coming up behind Jenna, and fast. Being the nice person she was Kenzie looked behind her to Takisha and yelled," Tell Jenna that Itachi is coming!"

Takisha gave Kenzie a thumbs up of understandment, looking bacl behind her she was startled to see how far behind Jenna actually was. Almost turning all the way around she called out," JENNA! RUN FASTER! ITACHI IS BEHIND YOU!!!"

Because Jenna was so far behind she couldn't hear the warning very well, all she got out of it was," RUN…BEHIND." Taking in a painful breathe Jenna yelled back," WHAAT?!?"

"ITACHI! BEHIND! YOU!" Takisha yelled again, this time getting the message to Jenna clearly.

After hearing that Jenna intended to turn around, only she never got the chance. Itachi had caught up during the time Takisha and Jenna were yelling. So when Takisha turned back around Itachi blew on the back of Jenna's neck. That was all she needed to get an adrenaline rush and bolt off with her hands in the air.

Takisha was just starting to slow down herself when Jenna went screaming (literally) past her. Her eye stuck in a twitched position she slowly turned her head around to see Itachi coming up on her. Not sure what Itachi did to Jenna, and not wanting to find out, she got her own adrenaline rush and took off.

Kenzie wasn't surprised to see Jenna run for her life, when it came to Itachi it wasn't that hard to make Jenna go. But when Takisha ran by soon after, she got nervous. More than positive that she'd screw herself over if she looked back, Kenzie just kept running at the steady pace she was already going at. Even when felt Itachi right behind her, she kept going at her steady pace. When Itachi poked her in the back with a kunai, she broke her pace.

Zipping up beside Takisha she screamed," He is going to be bald one day! Bald I say!"

Takisha glanced behind her, turned back forward and added on," Not just bald! Bald AND mustached in last-forever permanent marker!!!" Kenzie pumped her fist in the air and went faster. Takisha right beside her in pace, as Itachi easily started gaining speed.

Halfway through her second lap Jenna felt the adrenaline rush start to die, and with it came the pain and nausea. **(J: Don't know if this has been said or not, but I am anemic, meaning I have a low blood pressure that's not very good for physical activities. T: Ya, but with a fanfiction, you can change that. J: I'll keep it that way thanks. K: You just want to get out of running you lazy butt! "Smacks Jenna in the head" J: Hey! Not true! I just want to keep our characters accurate! Nothing wrong with that! K: So you say. T: You fail at keeping your own character accurate Jenna. Even on adrenaline you would have passed out before the end of the first lap. You just don't have the stamina. J: "Grump" Leave it be. T: Suit yourself.) **Slowing down to a walk Jenna held her sides and groaned," I think I'm going to throw up, then die. Urgh…."

"DON'T STOP!!! KEEP RUNNING!! RIGHT BEHIND US!!!" Takisha called up to Jenna having noticed she was almost completely stopped.

Jenna waved a hand to let Takisha know she heard, but still didn't move to go any faster. Kenzie opened her mouth and just about screamed at Jenna, only to get cut off by Itachi zipping up past her. Exchanging a look with Takisha she wheezed," Think he'll molest her or something?"

"I'm thinking a dip in the lake." Takisha responded, her voice carrying more concern than Kenzie's had. Kenzie thought about Itachi's personality for a second, then nodded in agreement.

Itachi flew up behind Jenna, scooped her up, then tossed her into the lake. All in one fluid motion. Standing on the edge of the lake he waited patiently for her to resurface. When she did Jenna screamed shrilly," W-what the hell was that for?! I was still m-moving you a-asshole!!! T-this water is f-freezing!"

"I know, isn't it great?" Kisame asked leisurely after coming up from beneath the water right beside Jenna, and scaring her senseless.

Kenzie and Takisha came up (not right next to) beside Itachi, running on the spot they watched as their pathetic friend attempted to swim back to shore. They were so focused on Jenna they didn't notice that Itachi had gone behind them. Grabbing each of their shirt collars in separate hands he launched them off into the lake. When they sputtered to the surface Takisha chattered," W-what was t-that f-for?!"

"W-we were st-still m-moving!!" Kenzie finished, doing her best to keep afloat even though, like Takisha and Jenna, she was dead tired.

Itachi crossed his arms and explained in a voice loud enough for them to head," I never expected you to finish the laps. I just wanted to exhaust you first. Now you must make it back to shore in a fatigued state, and at the same time avoid all the water bombs Kisame just planted."

"W-WATER B-B-BOMBS!!!!" The three girls squeaked in horror. Looking around they saw nothing, but Kisame smiled in smugness. The bombs were planted to the bottom of the lake with floating sticks tied to them by a length of rope. So that way, when one of the girls hits a stick, they lift the bomb up and set it off.

In their tired state the girls knew for certain they'd hit at least one bomb each. Jenna possibly more than one. They could barely keep their heads above the water as it was. **(J: If you recall from earlier, I CANNOT SWIM! K: Bull. You wouldn't be staying above the water otherwise. T: Plus floating on your back and propelling yourself forward counts as swimming. J: Okay…I have the swimming capabilities of a three year old. Better? T,K: Yes.)**

Kenzie (having gotten some life guard training prior to the kidnapping) was smart and flipped onto her back. This way her feet were barely near the bottom. Takisha observed and copied, as they paddled towards Jenna (who was already starting to drown) she called," Jenna! Save energy! Go on your back!"

"I would if I didn't have to worry about the shark that's coming straight for us!" Jenna yelled back, pointing to the dorsal fin of the lake's tenant advancing towards them.

Upon seeing it Takisha waved a careless hand saying," Pfft, don't worry about that big softie. I've been feeding him leftovers, he shouldn't bother us."

Kenzie was about to sigh in relief when Kisame interrupted," Oh, I forgot to tell you. I traded Rips for a bigger, more vicious watch shark. Say hi to Shreds." Eyes bulging Kenzie increased her padding speed a little. **(K: Fun Fact – ****NEVER**** splash around in the water when a shark is around. It'll only come faster. They interpret the splashing as that of a injured/distressed animal.)**

Takisha and Jenna followed suit quickly. Floating as fast as they could they didn't pay attention to Itachi who'd been watching and waiting for a good opportunity. An opportunity such as the three of them swimming for their lives from Kisame's new pet shark.

Walking onto the water he calmly approached the three swimming girls. He counted to ten, then made a jump that landed him right onto Kenzie's stomach. Knocking the wind out of her as he jumped onwards to Takisha's stomach, and onwards to Jenna's.

Still standing on the water he watched with Kisame beside him as they sunk into the water. After two seconds Itachi commanded," Get them out and put them on the shore." Chuckling Kisame allowed himself to go under.

He resurfaced a second later with the unconscious girls draped over his shoulders and under his arm. Doing as Itachi said he let them drop onto the ground by the lake. Itachi came over, observed whether any of them were breathing, then stomped on their solar plexus. That managed to revive them quickly.

Coughing and sputtering Jenna yelled," That twice! Twice you've let me drown, you ass! Ugh, that water tastes terrible!"

Holding a hand to the spot she'd been stomped on Takisha moaned," That really flipping hurt. Oww, it's gonna be black and blue for a month at most."

"Be grateful it was Itachi and not me that did the stomping. I would have broken some bones. Hahaha!" Kisame chuckled, watching as the girls didn't bother to stand up, but instead roll around moaning in agony.

Kenzie managed to point out to the lake to grumble," Yes, but it was YOU who bought a new shark and allowed it to go after us. If you hadn't changed the sharks we wouldn't have had to speed up and lose more energy!! So HA!" Kenzie's little rant earned her a good smack to the back of the head.

Itachi stood watching for another moment before saying," Morning training is finished for today. Go back to base and get cleaned up."

Groaning in unison they ignored Itachi and flopped out on the ground. They'd head back to the horrible cave when they were good and ready. Plus the grass was feeling really good, good enough to sleep on. Which is what they would have done if they weren't splashed with water…again. Spluttering and cursing the girls gave up on arguing with nature.

**~ Back inside the cave…After a clothes change~ **

Takisha, Kenzie, and Jenna sat at what they thought was the nosiest table in the universe. Deidara had woken up with enough energy to power a light house for decades, Hidan had been up all night praying and sacrificing. Having been in the same position for so long his neck had developed a kink, thus why he felt the need to curse non stop at full volume. Tobi was just his usual self, and Sasori decided to bring his latest puppet project to the table. Leaving the girls to listen to his squeaky nuts and screws being twisted and turned.

Glaring at the noise polluters Kenzie growled," Do you have to be SO DAMNED NOISY?! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!" An abrupt silence ensued the second she stopped yelling. All the guys looked over at Kenzie as if she'd grown a bigger chest. **(K: EXCUSE ME!? J:…Hm, you're right. Wrong choice of words. They'd be drooling.) **All the guys looked over at Kenzie as if she'd grown a third eye in the middle of her forehead. **(K: That's better. Now scratch out the other sentence you wrote!! J: But, it makes things funnier (:D) K: I don't care! Scratch it! J: Fine. "Pretends to scratch out sentence." Happy? K: Not until I actually see the sentence scratched, so show me. J:…"Looks around, sees Zetsu. Runs over to Zetsu and shoves paper with writing on it in his mouth." K: You just let Zetsu eat what your just wrote… Why? J: Because… because…Takisha asked me to? T: No I didn't. She just did that so you wouldn't see the non-scratched sentence. "Waves hand leisurely while explaining." K: "Glare." J: Hehe?)**

Kisame shook his head saying," Geez, you don't need to be a bitch just because Itachi woke you up for training early. Didn't you get up that early for school anyways?"

"Not that early!!" The girls chorused in agitation. After which they gave up in hopes of peace and quiet.

Glancing at the clock on the microwave Takisha saw that it was only an hour after Itachi had set off the alarm clocks! Totally confused Takisha asked," How can all of you be wide awake right now? For the past three weeks we've been here, you all got up at eight or later!"

"Oh, that's because going through dimensional gates takes a lot of chakra out of our systems. You wouldn't know that though because you three don't have any chakra…Not any we know of that is." Konan answered this after popping up from nowhere. Scaring the girls into a more alter set of mind for a bried tow seconds.

Stifling a yawn once she recovered Kenzie mumbled," I hope not, it would mean more training otherwise." Jenna and Takisha nodded their heads in exhausted agreement. The less training the better. Especially if it meant an even earlier wake up call.

Patting Jenna and Takisha on the heads Konan smiled cheerfully while saying," Don't worry Kenzie, so far these two have only shown any signs of having chakra inside. But you haven't been put into an extreme emotion yet, so you never know."

"K-Konan, why couldn't you tell her that in private? I'm pretty sure I just saw three different light bulbs shine in a few heads." Jenna whispered nervously to Konan. She didn't exaggerate. She could almost smell the smoke coming from Deidara, Kisame and Hidan's brains. Possibly even Sasori's. Which would be really, really bad since he still had to give them individual training. **(T: All I smell are the testosterone levels rising. Those boys are going to jump Kenzie faster than Neji can run away from the 'Curry of Life.' K: 0.o JEEENNNAAAA! "Clings to Jenna's arm." J: Don't look at me for help, I just write whatever the little people in my brain tell me… Which isn't looking very good for you. K: D8 T,J:" Snickering at whatever Kenzie is imagining.")**

Konan looked around at the 'innocently' smirking named men, knowing perfectly well one of them would succeed in their plans, she decided not to intervene and just smiled at Jenna," I'm sure they won't try anything and help us collect further intellect on you three. Enjoy your breakfast! Oh, and Takisha, it's Tobi's turn for your outfit. Someone be nice and take pictures for me okay? Toodles!" With a girlie wave she poofed away to the spa she'd made a reservation at. Leaving the girls absolutely defenseless against the guys for the whole day. All the men (including Leader) were aware of this, only the girls weren't. **(T: D8 Konan?! Why didn't you take us to the spa too?! Ko: You have training, and Kakuzu has a tight ass budget. Don't get raped now! "Wiggles fingers and poofs away." T: "Cries")**

Feeling her spine go rigid from frozen blood Kenzie stood up and announced," I'll be hiding under someone's bed all day if you need me. Bye." She then quickly walked away as fast as her legs could carry her. Which in truth was very fast, even though her legs had been through hell not too long ago.

Getting a similar, but more gradual sensation of danger Takisha and Jenna exchanged a nervous glance with each other. Being as casual as possible Takisha stuttered," I-I think I'll go get some more fresh air. Besides, it was starting to look beautiful outside. Don't want to waste any sunshine! You going to join me Jenna?"

"No thanks. I'll just go hole up in the library again." Jenna replied uncaringly and did make a show of heading towards the library. Only she went straight to her room instead.

Takisha had planned to do the same, her plan was ruined by Tobi calling out," Takisha-chan, you can't go outside yet! You have to put on Tobi's special outfit. Come to Tobi's room to get changed!" Although Takisha loved Tobi dearly, she couldn't quite trust his idea of what his special outfit was. She'd over heard Tobi tell the others it would be footie bunny pajamas.

Head lowered in surrender Takisha followed Tobi to his room. Going inside Takisha was relatively surprised to find it neat and orderly. She didn't see a stuffed animal or candy wrappers strewn across the floor. Quite impressed with this, Takisha didn't notice that Tobi had locked the door. She definitely didn't notice the sudden change Tobi underwent mentally from fun and friendly, to evil and conniving. As well as perverted as all the other males in residence.

Turning to Tobi Takisha asked hopefully," Any chance Tobi would be a really good boy and let Takisha wear something else than the bunny pajamas?"

"Sorry, but no. Don't worry, you won't be wearing any bunny pajamas. Just this tight black corset one piece and rabbit ears. Oh, and ribbon in your hair." Tobi's happy-go-lucky voice had dropped a few octaves, and there was no childish display when he took out the outfit he just described.

Suddenly very scared Takisha timidly asked," You're not Tobi anymore, are you?"

"Good guess sweet heart. Now be good and put these on. Otherwise things will get real nasty, real fast. I'll even be decent and turn my back to you." Madara did as he said and turned his back to the quivering Takisha.

Being in the presence of someone as intimidating as Kakuzu or Kisame was nothing compared to how Madara made Takisha feel.

Acting quickly she stripped down and put on the lung squeezing corset one piece. Thankfully it zipped up at the back instead of lacing. Hesitantly she tied the bow on top of her head and added the provided pink rabbit ears. Still scared Takisha squeaked," I'm changed… Can I leave now?"

" Ah ah ah. Our dear friend Konan asked for pictures. And I can't disappoint her. Smile pretty for the thirty cameras I set up while you were dressing." Madara turned around to show Takisha the device with the little red button in his hand.

Her eye twitching crazily Takisha screeched," What the fuck?! It's Madara isn't it? Well screw you Madara! I'm out of here! Konan can live without a picture." Stomping forward Takisha intended to push Madara and leave the room.

Madara, of course, would not allow such a thing to happen. When Takisha got close enough he grabbed her arm and threw her onto his bed. Before Takisha could sit up Madara jumped on top of her and pinned her arms down. Putting his face close to hers he hissed menacingly," I will not tolerate any dramatics from you young lady. You know as well as I do how easy it would be for me to kill you. Behave, you live with a few bruises. Disobey and you can kiss your chances of ever seeing your boyfriend good bye. So which will it be?"

Takisha would never tell anyone, but Madara scared her so much in that moment that she almost cried. Throughout the time Madara had talked, her throat seemed to dry of all and any moisture. When she replied it came out as a thin raspy response," I – I'll behave. I'll do what you want."

Gently grazing his hand along the side of Takisha's face Madara said soothingly," See, now that's not so hard is it? Now stand up and look pretty for the cameras. Then you may leave…On the condition that you tell no one about this, right?" Takisha quickly nodded her head in agreement. She would do anything to get away from this frightening man.

Pleased, Madara got up off of Takisha and patiently waited for her to get off the bed. When she was on her feet and more composed, Madara started taking the pictures. Every time he pushed the button once, the 15 cameras on the left would go off. When he pushed the button twice the 15 cameras on the right went off.

In hopes of leaving sooner Takisha put on a strained smile and held a few poses. It was after she held her third pose that the cameras stopped flashing and clicking. Looking to Madara with hopeful eyes she was surprised to find him gone and the door was wide open. Not needing an explanation Takisha ran out of the room and went straight to her bedroom to curl up in a ball.

~ Underneath Zetsu's Bed ~

Kenzie didn't lie when she told everyone she was going to cower beneath someone's bed. She'd gone straight to the room of someone no one would think to look. What better place to hide then in the man eating plant's room. **(J: That and she's been dying to see his room since the first day. K: Teehee, Zetsu's room smells pretty. And looks pretty." Insert happy chibi face of Kenzie") **Kenzie knew she'd made the right choice when she heard Deidara walk by the room calling out her name in a very scary voice. "Ooh Kenzie –chan! Where are you, un?! I want to show you something really beautiful, un! Come out, come out wherever you are, un!"

She was half way through sighing in relief when Zetsu's face suddenly appeared outside of the bed. He didn't look too pleased either when he beckoned her out with his finger. Knowing better than to say no to the guy that could drag her out with vines, Kenzie hesitantly crawled out from under the bed. Once she was standing he asked grumpily," Who said you could hide underneath my bed? _I don't recall ever saying you could_."

"B-but, your room is the safest place to hide Zetsu! Hidan and Deidara would never think to look for me here! Please let me stay under your bed, I haven't touched any of your pretty flowers or anything else. And I promise you won't even notice I'm here! Please! Please?!" Kenzie begged in a low whisper. All she needed was to get caught because they heard her voice.

Rubbing the bridge of his nose in agitation Zetsu grumbled," I knew bringing you three infuriating females would cause later regrets. _You'd think we'd learn after letting Tobi in._ Fine, you may continue hiding under my bed. _But if anyone asks me if I've seen you, I will tell them the truth._ Got it?" Kenzie happily nodded her head, gave Zetsu a quick hug then disappeared back under his bed.

Shaking his head Zetsu went about watering his precious friend. Who just happened to be venus fly traps. **(J: Would anyone who knows about Zetsu be surprised by that? T: I don't think so. K: If there is such a person, I would have to look down upon them. J,T: "Nods.")**

Many minutes passed without anything happening, and the more time that passed the more Kenzie got bored. Bored Kenzie found nothing to do to make her less bored. So, she ended up losing control of her thinking. Her thinking progressed like this.

Right after going under the bed – "Yay for Zetsu being nice! I knew that deep down past his flesh digesting nature there was a soft squishy heart waiting to be poke by a stick of desperation for help!"

Ten minutes after – "I am bored, hiding under this bed might not have ROLLIE POLLIE!! ROLLIE POLLIE!! AUGH!! (At that particular time Zetsu noticed a condensed cobweb ball roll out from under his bed. Accompanied by Kenzie's breathe harshly puffing out.) That thing could have gone into my mouth. I would have spazzed out and ran out from under Zetsu's bed. Then someone would find me and try to kill/rape me, or both! And it would have tasted really gross!"

A half hour after – "… Soooo booorreedd! Going to pass out from so much nothingness. All my limbs have fallen asleep and woken back up three times already… Maybe I should relocate, I would be doing something and right now whatever the guys have planned can't possibly be worse than ROLLIE POLLIE!! ROLLIE POLLIE!! Okay! I'm getting out of here, that stupid rollie pollie keeps flying back at me! Alright, at the count of three I will crawl out from under the bed and make a run for…for…Kakuzu's bed! Yeah! No one would look there either. I'm absolutely brilliant! One…two…THREE!!"

At the three Kenzie didn't just crawl out from under the bed, she speed crawled from under the bed. Right into a pair of non-Zetsu legs. How could she tell? By the fact that her head came up to the crotch and not the knees, that's how! Frozen on the spot Kenzie kept her gaze on the floor, prettified of who she thought was in front of her. To her utmost horror Deidara spoke," Mmm, I didn't exactly plan for this, un. But if you want to such much, I don't see why not, un." **(K: D8 JENNA! J: "Dying on floor laughing hysterically." T: "Eye twitches for a moment before starting to laugh as well." K: D8…"Becomes angry." YOU ARE SO DEAD!! J,T: " Still laughing while running away from Kenzie with sledge hammer")**

Immediately back pedaling Kenzie squeaked," You are filthy pervert! Get away from me at once! Or else I'll…I'll…I'll yell for Konan AND Kisame!!" She emphasized all of this by shaking a fist at Deidara's grinning face.

Deidara in turn laughed, not nicely either. Wiping a tear from his eye he wheezed," Oh, that's a good one, un. You seriously don't think I'm scared of that threat do you, un? Konan wouldn't be able to heart you from the spa in the land of Hot Springs, un. And Kisame has come to a mutual understanding with me, un. That leaves no one but yourself, and Leader-sama, which I highly doubt will happen, to protect you, un."

While Deidara had spoken he had slowly advanced, all the while Kenzie had retreated further back onto Zetsu's bed. **(T: Where is Zetsu? J: He left shortly after the third rollie pollie was blown out from under his bed. He then encountered Deidara who had been prowling the hallway. T: Ah, I see what happened then. I'm surprised Deidara was that patient. K: I was surprised he wasn't a girl. Dei: "Glares and holds up clay spiders." K: "Smiles and runs away.") **Deidara noticed what would happen before Kenzie did, and he made sure to take advantage.

Quickly reaching into his tools pouch he pulled out a smoke bomb and set it off. This surprised Kenzie long enough for Deidara to do the same thing to Kenzie that he did to Takisha. He pinned Kenzie up against the wall by using two kunais and some wire.

Her arms pinned to her sides to with her back up against the wall, Kenzie found herself totally immobile. Except for her mouth which she immediately used," DEIDARA YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!! LET ME GO BEFORE I USE ME LEGS TO SUFFOCATE YOU!! JUST LIKE YOU WIL TRY WITH TOBI IN THE FUTURE!!"

Non of that really made sense to Deidara, and he honestly didn't care. He was about to help Konan and Leader see if Kenzie had any source of chakra, and he was going to do it the best way he knew. Being a total pervert! Wiggling his fingers teasingly he inched closer to lay his filthy hands on her, only he never got close enough. For Kenzie had her feet free still, and she did not hesitate to use them. First she kicked Deidara in the face, leaving him with the distinct smell/taste of Nacho Cheese Doritos. **(J: Total inside joke there xD) **She didn't stop there though, she grabbed Deidara in a strangle hold using only her legs.**(J: And thus Deidara learned how to kill someone with only his legs. He was taught by Kenzie, then later used it on Tobi. So if you've ever wondered how Deidara learned how to kill people with his legs, it's all thanks to Kenzie. T: Who learned it from him…Which is starting to turn into a monsterous cycle! End it before my brain dies of confusion!)**

You're probably aware that a guy strangling another guy using their legs doesn't look too bad. However a girl strangling a guy could be taken a different way if you didn't know them very well. Leader knew them both enough to know that what he walked in one wasn't romantically awkward. They didn't notice he was there until he cleared his throat very loudly.

Upon hearing Leader's announcement of his arrival Kenzie ceased strangling Deidara, paused to make sure he didn't think they were doing something dirty, then kicked Deidara away and cried," Please tell me you're here to save me!!" Since Deidara was gasping for breathe he couldn't say anything against Leader like he did with Kisame and Konan. He wouldn't have been able to anyways, he knew what Leader wanted Kenzie for. He assumed the other two were already in the larger, closed off section of the cave.

Leader went along with the situation and held up a kunai knife, not bothering to say anything he went over and cut the wires holding Kenzie. So grateful to be free Kenzie eagerly glomped Leader, Leader reacted instantly and grabbed her shirt collar. Holding on to her tightly he teleported them to the darkest part of the hideout.

Jenna and Takisha (doing her best to stay curled up in a tiny ball to hide her costume) were indeed already there. They were also in the center of a large circle constructed out of kanjis. At three specific points of the circle stood Itachi, Kisame and Hidan.

The points they stood at had extending lines that led to three smaller circles inside the large circle. Jenna stood in the smaller circle that connected to Itachi, and Takisha stood in the smaller circle that connected to Hidan. Seeing the empty circle that led to Kisame Kenzie figured out what was about to happen… A second too late.

Before she could struggle for her freedom Leader threw her into her reserved spot. The second she touched the ground inside the circle she knew she couldn't break free, it was an instinctive primal sensation of being caged. Looking at Leader she asked nervously," What the hell is this?! You never said anything about creepy chakra kanji stuff in the morning info session!"

"If I had said anything you would have resisted more and cause this to take longer than it need to be. Now be silent so I may concentrate!" Leader was definitely in Leader mode, making everything he said and did enforced with death after effects.

Being silent as told to she looked to Jenna and Takisha for more information. Jenna shrugged with scared shitless all over her face. Takisha poked her head up to shake it no before curling back up. Whatever was about to happen was going to be a big surprised for all three of them.


	12. The Men's Attempts

**J: Welly, well well. Didn't get as many reviews as I was hoping to. But I don't blame you guys. My writing these days has been pretty crappy. But I have found the secret to improvement! I need to write, when I'm tired!**

**T: But if you're tired, you won't write alot???**

**K: Some good quality, it better than no or forced crappy quality. Right?**

**J: Correct! And now, since she asked, and she is a faithful reviewer, Demoness Drakon is here.**

**DD: Hi! "Waves at people reading" So...Where is he? "Looking around eagerly."**

**K: Where is who?**

**J: Give him a second.**

**Dei: "Poofs into the room" Man, I am the most popular man these days, un! "Big smile"**

**DD: DEIDARA! "Tackle glomps"**

**Dei: Yay! Another fangirl,un! "Developes perverted face."**

**J,K,T: DEIDARA DON'T YOU --**

**Dei: "Poofs away to bedroom with Demoness Drakon"**

**J: Uh...oh....He is so dead. And now I have to disclaim myself -.-" "Grump" "Sigh" I do not own any Naruto characters named, nor do I own Takisha or Kenzie. I only own myself....Now enjoy while I go find Deidara and rescue Demoness Drakon.**

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Chapter Eleven – The Men's Attempts

Though the cave was utterly dark the girls could still clearly see everything happening around them. They could see Leader making some hand sign or other, and they could see his mouth moving but they heard nothing.

Takisha, even though she was curled up in a ball, knew Hidan stood three meters from her. Just as Itachi and Kisame stood three meters away from Jenna and Kenzie.

Studying the kanjis used to make the circle Takisha noticed that they were similar to the one used by Granny Tsunade to seal her curse mark. Whatever Leader was doing, it wasn't going to be sealing anything…But, maybe he was binding.

More concerned for their well being than the consequences Takisha uncurled from her ball and stood up. Looking straight at Hidan, Takisha demanded," Hey, Hidan! What the hell is going on? Tell me before I start going ape shit on your ass!"

Hidan's eye twitched from the mass amount of restraint he was using to not yell back at her. Like the other two, he'd been told not to utter a single word when the process started. It would take only a few more seconds before – There!

The kanjis surrounding them suddenly lit up like fireworks. Covering their eyes the girls cried out in surprise. Since they couldn't see they didn't watch as Leader collected the light into three small orbs. Once the right amount of light was collected he threw the orbs at the girls.

On impact the orbs first covered their bodies, and then slowly shrunk into a single band around their necks. Slowly the light dimmed and darkened into a solid black line that then faded into their skin. The forced entry of something unwanted was too much for the girls' bodies to handle. Their bodies shut down, causing the girls to fall into unconsciousness.

Sweating from the large amount of chakra used Leader looked over to Itachi, Kisame, and Hidan expectantly. The three Akatsuki members pulled their cloak collars away so Leader could see their own fading black rings. Giving a nod he instructed them," If ever the girls are out of the lair and are about to tell anyone not in the Akatsuki something secret, you need only to smear your blood on your neck." Itachi, Kisame, and Hidan nodded in understanding. They thought it was rather annoying to have to play cling on the second the girls left the cave, but it was better than them blabbing and unintentionally loosing an ambush on them. **(K, T: We'd gladly tell anyone on purpose!)**

Accepting this Leader teleported back to his room to recuperate. Left alone in the chamber the guys exchanged a look that asked,' What to do now?' Hidan answered the question first, "I know that stupid blonde failed to get any sign of chakra out of her, which makes it my turn! Later boys! Tell Sasori he can have her last for training." He stooped down and picked up the unconscious Kenzie, with her under his arm he poofed away to his own chamber of destruction.

Kisame upper lip curled back into a nasty sneer, in his mind he growled,' damn that religious jerk; I was going to grab her! He better not do anything too disturbing, I want her in one piece.' Out loud he asked Itachi," You going to do anything with the shrimp?"

Itachi glanced at Jenna's unconscious body, thought about it for a second, then replied," No, what I accomplished the other day will satisfy me for at least a week. You can give her or the rabbit to Sasori." His opinion given Itachi disappeared to do something or other.

Looking down at Takisha and Jenna Kisame could only sigh. He seemed to do a lot of body clean up lately. Agitation clear on his face Kisame picked up the two girls and teleported to Sasori's room.

**-In Sasori's Room-**

Sasori sat at his desk tinkering with different blue prints and outlines of possible puppet designs for the girls. **(J: He's just planning ahead for the future. You never know when Hidan will succeed in a sacrifice.) **He'd just decided on retractable arm blades for Takisha when Kisame appeared in his room with Takisha and Jenna under his arms. Holding them out to him Kisame asked," Do you want one of them now or can I drop both of them in the lake?"

Sasori thought about it them decided," I'll take Target Two for training. I haven't figured out what to do with Target One's curse mark strength. Where's Target Three?"

"Oh right. Hidan said you could wait until he was done with her, but I'm telling you that I get my chance at her after Hidan. You can have her after me." His information given Kisame dropped Jenna on the floor then left for the lake with Takisha.

Sasori stayed in his seat and observed Jenna's form for a short time. Being a puppet meant sleep and food weren't necessary. He felt so much more superior compared to his human organization members.

His observations finished Sasori cast his chakra strings over Jenna's body. Making her stand up, he couldn't help but notice how short she was. 'I'm sure she'll appreciate the height enhancement once I turn her into a puppet.' Either she could read people's minds in her sleep, or she just made a wild guess, Jenna came to consciousness and the first thing she said was," I know, I'm short. Stop rubbing it in."

"Good, you just saved me some work. We can get straight to the training now." Sasori replied to not show his surprise.

Scrunching her eyebrows Jenna questioned sleepily," What, Sasori? How – How did I get in your room?! Last thing I remember is being in the biggest part of the lair where you jerks suck bijus out of their hosts. Leader was doing something or other, and then there was a really bright light covering the three of us… Do you know what Leader did to us Sasori?!"

"What Leader does and doesn't do isn't something I constantly keep track of. I'm sure whatever it was will be revealed to you shortly. At the moment all you need to be concerned with is whether you will survive training. Come." Walking from the room Sasori made Jenna follow after him. That was when Jenna started cursing Sasori for controlling her with chakra, yet again. **(K: You didn't realize you were being controlled until now? J:… T: You seriously worry me sometimes Jenna. J: "Kicks a rock.")**

Tobi, Deidara, and Kakuzu were sitting in the living room doing nothing when Sasori walked through with Jenna "obediently" walking behind him. Snickering Kakuzu asked Sasori," You training with tough love or with a soft hand?"

Sasori stopped and glanced back at Jenna, her pulse froze when Sasori smirked crookedly to reply," I'm thinking both." He then continued his walk out to what would be their training grounds.

-**Out in the middle of the Forest-**

Releasing his control over Jenna, Sasori turned to face her and simply instructed," Now, I'm going to attack. You need to defend while thinking about nothing."

"But, what will th- WAH!!" Before Jenna could finish her sentence Sasori jumped at Jenna with his poisoned sword.

She barely managed to dodge in time by jumping backwards. Doing her best not to fall Jenna yelled," You asshole! Are you trying to kill me?!"

"I told you to keep your mind clear. Keep thinking and you will die." Sasori said breathlessly while moving in for his next death strike.

Dodging to the side Jenna squeaked," When someone is trying to kill you, not thinking about something is really flippin hard!"

Sasori made no response, but he kept going with his lethal attacks. Miraculously Jenna managed to dive, duck, and dodge out of Sasori's reach.

The pattern of attacking and evading continued for a ruthless ten minutes. When Jenna dodged his last horizontal swing her legs gave out and let her collapse to the ground. Glaring up at Sasori's sword she gasped," If you attack me now…I won't…be able to…dodge."

"Good. Now we can move onto the chakra development of your training." Sasori sheathed his sword and sat down across from Jenna. Jenna groaned and thought bitterly, ' Oh my Saint Jimmy! If he needed to wear me out he could have just made me exercise instead of trying to slice me to pieces!! Augh! Him and Itachi, I swear they are the worst of all the Akatsuki.'

His face emotionless Sasori told Jenna," In order for this to work you need to feel nothing but anger. So listen very carefully to what I'm about to say to you."

Despite her great detest for the non-human being Jenna did indeed give him her full attention. **(T; Uh oh. K: Uh oh what? T: I know what he'd going to tell her. K: Oh, me too. I don't care. T: But, but… It's bad! K: Not a good enough point.) **Sasori had to actually stop himself from smiling at what he was about to start.

Making sure she didn't see him twitch his fingers to cast strings on her again Sasori looked Jenna straight in the eyes to say," Yesterday, Itachi Uchiha made sure to so do something to piss the Kazekage off. He tattooed his name on your back. You just got so mad you repressed the memory." Sasori was actually amazed she hadn't tweaked out before he finished his sentence.

Watching her face he noticed that something in Jenna's eyes sparked, lit and roared to life. It was her anger. He was so focused on her face he didn't feel the pull on his chakra strings that were attached to her legs. Only when her arms started fighting did he look down at her limbs. To his astonishment every muscle in her limbs were flexed and straining against his hold. Her eyebrows finally furrowed as he'd been waiting for, what he didn't expect was how her voice would sound," That fucking bastard needs to be slaughtered! Let me go. NOOOW!" The way Jenna yelled reminded Sasori of a cat warning off another cat on it's territory. 'So this is how she channels her chakra. I wonder how things would be if she had a companion or some sort of tool…Hmm.'

Keeping her locked in place Sasori stood up and walked behind Jenna, in a quick movement of the finger he hit a central nerve on the back of her neck. When she sagged forward Sasori cut the strings on her body. Taking out a notepad and pencil he recorded everything he'd learned.

"Onto Target One. She should be up and moving by now." Sasori mumbled to himself before walking off to the lake. (Where Takisha was swimming away from Shreds.)

**-Meanwhile-**

Kenzie was enjoying the darkness her mind was swimming in, so it was very annoying when the smell of incense woke her from her sleep. Opening her eyes she grumbled," I think…I need to hurt Leader for once."

"It can wait until I'm finished with you." Hidan remarked and stepped into Kenzie's line of sight. Just so she could get a nosebleed. **(T: Don't tell me. J: Yup. K: Again!?! J: Yup K: "Cries") **After Hidan brought Kenzie to his room he made sure to strip all his clothes off, that way Kenzie could have a more… Pleasant surprise.

Kenzie instinctively closed her eyes and tried to put her hands over her nose, only to find that she couldn't move her arms or legs. For they were shackled to the wall. Straining against them she yelled at Hidan," What the hell!? Why the fuck am I shackled to your wall?!"

Instead of cursing back at her like Kenzie expected Hidan to, Hidan's face softened and he leaned towards Kenzie's face. Stopping three inches away he practically cooed," Because, I'm going to help Leader learn whether you have chakra or not. And I'm going to do it my way. So brace yourself." He then did something he hadn't done for almost a year.

Hidan licked the side of Kenzie's face. It took all the will power she possessed not to scream. **(H: Would it have been a good scream? "Pervy grin." K: 0///o NO! And I hate you so much right now Jenna! J: Why do you think I'm hiding? "Yells this from behind some furniture." K: "Glares at Takisha." T: "Shrugs." I honestly don't know where she is this time. J: I learned from past experiences not to trust you with my hiding locations. H: Your hiding skills suck girl. "Points to the rug on the floor." K: "Raises an eyebrow and pulls rug off floor." J: "Smiles up at Kenzie from hole in the floor covered with a hole filled plastic cover." T: I'm impressed.)**

Her teeth and eyes clamped shut Kenzie growled," Deidara already tried this approach!"

Using a seductive voice Hidan asked," Did he succeed? I don't think so, that's why I'm putting a twist on this." Hidan then slipped his hand up the back of her shirt.

Very gently he trailed his fingers down the back of Kenzie's spine. It made him very happy when Kenzie went rigid and goose bumps rippled over her skin. Arching her back to get away from Hidan's touch Kenzie yelled (she hoped it was right in his ear, remember, she has her eyes closed.) "STOP TOUCHING ME!! I AM GOING TO BITE AND RIP YOUR NOSE OFF!!"

"How are you going to bite my nose off when you have your eyes closed?" Hidan asked smartly. He knew that this probably wouldn't work, but if it did he could get a good laugh out of Kenzie.

To his delight Kenzie actually opened her eyes and tried to bite Hidan's nose. Moving just out of her reach he laughed out loud to himself," Oh my Jashin! I can't believe you actually fell for that!! HAHAHA!! I have to tell Kakuzu about this. Man are you ever so stupid!" To put more emphasis on how funny he thought this was Hidan slapped his knee like a hillbilly.

Glaring (only at his face) Kenzie didn't bother to say anything in her defense. She knew she'd made herself look like a HUGE idiot, not the first time she's done that. Waiting until Hidan calmed down she told him," Yeah I'm stupid this once, but in my accounts you've done so many more stupid things than me. Like right now, that knee slapping thing was really stupid. Now that you've made fun of me, can I go hole up under another bed?"

"No. You can stay here and let me finish having my way with you. I definitely have to leave a mark, just to piss off that fucking idiot of a blonde." Hidan replied more in his normal voice and jabbed a finger against the middle of Kenzie's chest.

Blushing bright red Kenzie attempted to force herself out of the shackles again. Only to fail, hurt herself, and make Hidan laugh at her. Again. While Hidan laughed a flash back from the other day came to memory. Crossing her fingers Kenzie sucked in a deep breathe and yelled as loud as possible, "KIIISSAAAMEEE!!"

There came no sound from Hidan or the hallway for a brief second, and then …

'POOF!' Kisame jumped into the room (instead of breaking the wall) and stood in front of Kenzie. Arms crossed Kisame said matter of factly," It's my turn with her now."

"Fuck you! It's still my turn, and it will continue to be my turn until I'm done with her." Hidan growled back already in a fighting stance.

Raising a fist not Kisame growled fiercely," I want my turn NOW! I've been waiting for my chance since the other day! Deidara refused to let me at her then, you're not standing in my way this time."

The bickering continued from there with much swearing. Kenzie lost track of the argument shortly after it started and instead started thinking, 'Wow, this whole calling for help thing works great. Maybe I should use it more often? Hmm, probably not. Kisame will probably get pissed off after a few more times. At least there's one other man besides Tobi who isn't utterly perverted. Uh oh, they're resorting to fists now.' The sudden sound of a first impacting with a face pulled Kenzie out of her train of thought. The bickering had unsurprisingly escalated past the point of verbal attacks. Hidan had unsurprisingly lost his temper first and got a sucker punch into Kisame's face.

Wiping away the small amount of blood that came from his mouth Kisame grinned, undoing the buttons on his cloak he taunted," Is that the best punch you can throw at me with my guard down? That was just pathetic. Praying has made you soft."

Kenzie made the (D8) face, Kisame had just opened himself a big can of Hidan aggression. You don't call Hidan a push over because of his praying and expect to get away with it. Kenzie watched in terror as Hidan only glared, then took three steps backwards. Kenzie saw what he was stepping into before Kisame did," Uh, Kisame. He doesn't have any of your blood does he?"

"Not that I know of, why?" Kisame looked back at Kenzie to see her staring at Hidan's feet. Looking down himself he saw that Hidan was standing in his Jashin emblem.

Raising his eyes to Hidan's he found Hidan smiling while holding up his index finger. On the middle of his finger sat a small container of blood. Getting into a defensive position Kisame snarled," That better not be my blood you asshole."

"Don't worry, it's not yours. It's hers." Hidan gestured with his head towards Kenzie, who then started fighting against her shackles as if her life depended on it. Which it pretty much did considering the fact that whoever Hidan stood in the circle for never lived afterwards.

His thumb positioned on the cork Hidan informed Kisame," I get some more time with her, or else she dies here and now. As soon as I drink her blood, she has to die…Well?"

"How about option three?" Kisame suggested more laid back than any man trying to protect someone should be.

His eyebrows furrowed Hidan asked," And what would option three be? You being sacrificed instead? Sorry, but Jashin doesn't like shark fin soup." Hidan made sure to look snide and smug with that remark.

Kisame allowed his anger to surface a little when he took out Samehada and threw it at Hidan. Unprepared Hidan lost his balance, which caused the vial of Kenzie's blood to fall off his finger and break. While he glared at the broken vial and spilt blood Kisame took the opportunity to break the shackles holding Kenzie. (With his bare hands of course.) Once the last ankle shackle fell to the ground Kisame scooped Kenzie up off the ground and said tauntingly," See you at supper Hidan." A smugger face than the one Hidan had on earlier played across Kisame's as he calmly walked out the door with Kenzie. **(T: Wait, supper? What happened to lunch? J: The whole thing with Zetsu and Deidara, then the secret sealer procedure took up a good chunk of time. It's already three hours past lunch. T,K: Woow. We have no sense of time in this place. J: it doesn't help that there are only clocks in every other bedroom.)**

Out in the hallway Kenzie let out a sigh of relief, smiling up at Kisame she cheeped happily," You have no idea how much more I like you right now."

"Hmm, mind not liking me?" Kisame asked in all seriousness.

Confused Kenzie responded as anyone else would," Huh?"

Stopping in the hallway Kisame gave Kenzie the most bone chilling smile she'd ever been shown," You didn't think I'd steal you from Hidan just to save you did you?"

"Actually I was really under the impression that that was the current situation." Kenzie said nervously. How things were starting to change made Kenzie very, very, very uncomfortable. Uncomfortable to the point of wanting to go and hole up under Zetsu's bed again.

His teeth added to the smile Kisame chuckled lightly," Sorry to burst your bubble sweet heart, but I want to be the one that gets a sign of chakra out of you."

Eyes as big as Kakuzu's face **(J: The guy is HUGE, his face would be huge too!) **Kenzie's face flushed she squeaked," Wh-what?! Why?! I thought you were a lot better than all the other perverted jack asses."

"Aww, so sorry to disappoint. Actually, not really. Don't worry though, I won't be using the same dirty methods as the other two failures." Kisame felt Kenzie's muscles bunch to be ready to fight and run.

Tightening his hold he continued walking to his bedroom, screaming/crying/struggling and other things that any captive would do in order to draw attention from anyone else for assistance was all Kenzie could do. **(J: Now while all this fun stuff was happening with Kenzie. K: It was anything but fun!! J: … While all of this was happening with Kenzie, Sasori was helping Takisha with her control of chakra. Time to be kind and rewind!)**

**~ Rewind to Sasori Leaving Jenna ~**

Sasori approached the lake at a leisurely pace so he could hear any sudden splashing or desperate cries for help. Instead he heard," Bad, bad shark. You don't try to eat me, ever! Do you understand Shreds?... Good boy. I'll give you leftovers starting tomorrow." Breaking through an overgrown spot of bushery Sasori found himself watching Takisha pet the so called "vicious" shark Kisame had recently purchased.

Shreds sensed Sasori's presence before Takisha did, she only realized someone else was there when Shreds dove back into the water. Turning to face Sasori Takisha put her hands on her hips and huffed," If you're here for training then forget it. I'm not doing anything until A: I change my clothes. AGAIN! And B: I'm hungry, and I'm sure other people are as well seeing as it is past lunch time. Have I made myself clear?"

"Perfectly. It doesn't mean I'll do as you say though." To demonstrate his point Sasori immediately cast chakra strings over Takisha. It was amusing to watch her face change from haughty to horrified to outraged all in one second.

Taking deep breathes Takisha said through a strained voice," Sasori, let me go. Please and thank you."

"I refuse. Now save your breathe for training. We're starting, you like it or not." That argument settled (not really) Sasori headed back towards the section of trees he'd been training in with Jenna. Whom, to his surprise, was not there.

Facing Takisha he noticed that her eye was slightly twitching. Figuring it to be mere agitation he asked," Since you have shown the most potential for chakra development, probably due to your curse mark, you must have realized something by now. During your temper tantrums before and after the curse mark has spread over your body, did you feel anything different inside your body? Like a tingling or light burning sensation?"

"How about a sizzling sensation through all my veins? Is that what you're talking about?" Takisha asked, her eye twitching a little less as the sizzling feeling she just mentioned intensified and moved towards a singular location. The location being her shoulder.

Sasori saw what was coming next before Takisha even thought about it. It was slow at first, he watched as the little leaves traveled across Takisha's skin. All the while her chakra became visible as a shade of poisonous purple threads that sprout out then wrapped around her skin. Pleased at how fast things were progressing he asked," Tell me, is there any kind of image floating through your mind right now?"

Takisha knew she was losing control of things when the sizzling sensation spread out through her body again, following at a slower pace was the leaves of the curse mark. Taking deep breathes to try and calm herself Takisha closed her eyes. That did a considerable job of calming her down as well. It also allowed her to see what Sasori was talking about. With her eyes closed Takisha only saw darkness, and in that darkness stood something like a ghost. It was pure white and it's shape couldn't hold still, it's arms would wisp away then regroup. Even though the shape was rough Takisha could still tell that it was suppose to be her. Reaching out with her mind she touched the wispy white version of herself. On contact she opened her eyes and said to Sasori," I know what I can do with my chakra."

Throughout the time Takisha had experienced all this Sasori had watched in interest. At first nothing happened after she'd closed her eyes. But then the wind picked up, any leaves on the ground were sucked into a small vortex of wind. It looked like a normal little wind cyclone, slowly it spread out and enlarged. The leaves weren't just flying around in a circle, they were starting to make an outline. An outline that looked like Takisha. Takisha opened her eyes and the wind died back down, dropping the leaves on the ground. Takisha's eyes held a light of deeper intellect when she said," I know what I can do with my chakra."

Taking out his notepad and pencil Sasori said just as calm as if nothing extraordinary happened," As do I. That's all for today, you may go." Finished Sasori tucked away his notepad and pencil.

Walking away towards the cave he heard Takisha yell," Would it be bad for me to train by myself?!"

"Not necessarily, but be careful you don't kill yourself." Sasori called back over his shoulder. He wasn't really expecting Takisha to get far when she didn't know any hand signs.

Takisha sat down on the ground, crossed her legs and took deep breathes,' Whatever I just did a second ago stopped the curse mark and retracted it. If I can do that faster there's more chances for me to stay in control during a bad situation. So let's find that white wispy me.' Closing her eyes Takisha started her first day of meditation training. **(T: … K: … J: What? T,K: I can't see that in reality. J: It's a fanfiction, and what I want to happen, happens. And I wanted Takisha to start meditation training. Nyah! "Sticks out tongue." T: You are very immature. K: And you are very scary. J: Yes, FEAR ME!)**

**~ Going to Kisame's Room ~**

"Kisame, put me down!" Kenzie demanded for probably the twenty third time since Kisame had started to walk to his bedroom.

Inwardly shaking his head Kisame could only think, ' I think this one might actually be worse than Konan when it comes to nagging.' Entering his bedroom and closing the door with his foot he told Kenzie," I will gladly put you down now." He then threw Kenzie onto his water bed. **(K: Wait, did you just way WATER bed? J: Indeed I did. K: That bastard! T: Why does he get an awesome bed? J: Because he stole from the lo – Ki: "Looms and glares." J: Because he stole it from the hotel he and Itachi last stayed in for a mission. K: What were you about to say? J: I cannot divulge that information, or else I will lose my life. T: If Kisame leaves can you tell us? J: Like I'm going to answer that in front of him. K:… Kisame will you leave, pretty please? Ki: No. If I do, she comes with me. "Points to Jenna." J: "Sigh" T: Dammit Jenna, you're going to tell us what you never said sooner or later! J: Great, now he's going to stalk me for eternity! Thanks Takisha! J: Whatever this secret is must be pretty embarrassing if he's willing to stalk you for eternity. J: "Smirks." You have no idea how hysterical it sounds. Ki: "Intensifies glare." J: And that's all I'm going to say. K,T: Awww!)**

Seeing as it was a water bed it made it very difficult to stablelize herself. Doing her best to prop herself up Kenzie grumbled," Why do you get a waterbed?! Why did you throw me onto your waterbed?!" It actually bothered her more that it was a waterbed, rather than the fact that she'd been thrown onto the bed.

Kisame had been locking his door **(J: He has massive locks that are old fashioned and require keys by the way.)** so he was amused to turn around and find Kenzie struggling to get up. Fighting back his laughter at how ridiculous she looked he replied with a smile instead," My ownership of a bed shouldn't be your main concern right now. I'm going to crack that chakra out of you before you can even realize the pain you're feeling." He ended his sentence with a diabolical chuckle.

Shivering inside Kenzie did her best to get a grip on her placement she squeaked," Wh-what?! I don't want to feel any pain! What are you going to do?!"

"I'm going to do the best I can." **(J: Original line comes from Tim Burton's awesome movie 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' ) **Kisame replied, causing Kenzie to have a déjà vu flash of the Boogey Man answering Santa Claus.

Shaking her head to dislodge the mental image she remarked," Answering a question with a movie quote is terrible. Tell me what you're actually going to do." Kenzie managed to put her hands on her hips to look more serious, it would have worked better if she hadn't lost her solid spot and fell over again.

Reaching for his cloak he placed his hands in the crease between the buttons, holding his arms still he asked," Choose your poison." He then ripped his cloak open, revealing his upper torso to be covered by a tight black muscle shirt. On his left hip he had a holster holding multiple kunais, on his right hip he had a holster holding a huge pink feather duster.

Her one eye twitching Kenzie quickly put a hand over her face to hide the gushing nose bleed erected by Kisame's shirt choice. Glaring over her hand Kenzie yelled," Choose?! Okay, I choose NOTHING! Let me go." 'Well…The middle option would be some pretty killer poison…AH! TRAITOROUS MIND!!'

"That's not an option put in front of you. Which will it be? Option A or B?" Kisame pointed to the kunais and the feather duster for options A and B.

'(Insert chibi Kenzie with devil's horns and tail) Option C! I'll take option C gladly! (Insert chibi Kenzie with angel wings and halo) Augh! You're a horrible portion of the mind. Be gone with thee at once. (Angel Chibi then proceeds to beat on Devil Chibi) ' As all this progressed within Kenzie's mind she stayed stubborn," I choose absolutely nothing!"

"Fine then, let's go with both. Starting with Option A. Hold still, or else this is really going to hurt." Taking out a kunai he pointed it straight at the spot where her belly button was.

Covering her stomach with her arms she cried," What are you doing?! That's my belly button! There's nothing you can do to a belly button…Except…"

"Except pierce it!" He finished for her while holding up a small metal stud ring meant for belly button piercings. (Generously donated by Leader, A full supporter of any of his followers' piercing needs.)

Using evasive maneuvers Kenzie quickly rolled off the waterbed and got into a defensive stance. This only made Kisame chuckle," You know that is such a pathetic stance that it's actually quite adorable. Only in a pathetic way of course." In the very deep part of his mind Kisame actually thought , ' That really goes beyond pathetic adorableness, and goes straight to incredibly cute.' **(J: Since this thought occurred in the very deepest part of his mind, he was never actually aware of the thought. T: Poor Kenzie, and she likes him so much too. K: At this moment, I have null and void feeling for him. J: Then it all works out.)**

Slightly blushing Kenzie stuttered," A-any chance I'm too pathetically adorable to torture?"

"Nope. But plan A can change. I can give you a tattoo instead of a piercing if you'd like?" Kisame was in a good mood, a good mood meant he'd be more lenient in his choice of painful torture.

"Uh, I think the piercing would be better, I can just take out the ring and let it grow over." Kenzie thought out loud to herself. Thinking out loud must not have been the smartest thing for her to do, especially not right in front of the person that wanted to do the torturing.

Putting his finger to his chin in a classic pose for thinking Kisame said thoughtfully," Hmm, good point there. Best coat the ring in chakra first to make sure it stays in there, as well as to prevent infection."

"Gee, you're so kind and considerate of my health, maybe I should be grateful… On second thought, no. You're still just as bad as all the other jerks and bastards in this hell hole of a place I have to call temporary home." Kenzie muttered all this just loud enough for Kisame to hear. In response he merely shrugged and clamped his hand around what would be Kenzie's permanent belly button ring.

Since he was concentrating on coating the ring, that left Kenzie with what had to be her only opportunity to freedom. There was still the gigantic problem of Kisame having the key to his two industrial locks hidden in one of his bajillion pockets. She didn't know how to pick locks either (though she assumed they would teach her that later on.) Putting her fingers in her mouth to chew on the nails she debated in her mind, ' I could try jumping on him to knock him over then quickly check his pockets… He wouldn't let something light like me knock him over. Plus he'd probably just skip to plan C when he caught me. Damn what can I do? Maybe I can call for help from someone else? No, that wouldn't work either. Ugh! FML!!' "Alright, I think that should do it for a few years. You ready?" Kisame snapped Kenzie out of her thought process.

Making a split second decision Kenzie yelped," Can't we just go to plan B?!"

"Oh, so when it comes to blood being drawn you make up your mind. Well I don't see any reason why not. Just don't forget it was your decision chika." Kisame didn't seem too surprised at Kenzie's sudden change in decision, she wondered if he hadn't expected it.

Tucking away the kunai in the holster he also grabbed the lethal pink feather duster. When Kisame pulled out the feather duster a random, though seemingly important (to her) question popped into Kenzie's mind. Pointing to the feather duster Kenzie asked," Where did you get that ridiculous feather duster? I would have remembered seeing it around the cave if it's been here for a while."

Kenzie could have sworn she saw Kisame's ears turn purple. **(J: Pink/red plus blue makes purple :D ) **Avoiding eye contact he mumbled," It's Itachi's."

Her jaw hanging open Kenzie gasped," You're shitting me right?"

The fact that he didn't reply answered Kenzie's question loud and clear, smirking she couldn't help but ask," And where exactly did Itachi get that from, and who has he been using it on?"

Crossing his arms Kisame cleared his throat before replying," I honestly do not know that information. Enough questions, it's time your torture started." Stepping forward Kisame attempted to look fearsome, only he knew that was an impossible accomplishment when his weapon of torture was a pink feather duster.

Cautious more than afraid Kenzie arched her back away from Kisame, keeping her stomach out of his reach. She was startled when a set of arms grabbed her from behind and pulled her arms back. Doing her best to look behind her Kenzie cried out," What the hell?! Who's holding me?!"

"My shadow clone. He's been hiding under the bed this whole time. I thought now would be the best time to put some restraints on you." Kisame replied cheekily. The best part about having a lot of chakra was that his shadow clone could last longer and not even drain him throughout the time.

Squirming to try and get free Kenzie thought bitterly, ' Argh, I thought it was weird that the bed was poking me… Thank god it was poking me in the back.' To Kisame she stated grumpily," You are a cheating meanie butt! Hidan and Deidara didn't use clones."

"Yeah, and they failed to get a reaction." He was all serious when he said this, so Kenzie was totally caught off guard when Kisame jabbed forward and shoved the feather duster up underneath her shirt.

Needless to say the reaction was instantaneous. Wiggling and squirming about Kenzie could only shriek and giggle hysterically. Deep down inside Kisame's subconscious, he was getting turned on way too much for a normal male. Even a blue man such as he should not have gotten such a thrill from mere tickle torture.

Moving the feather duster in such a way that it went around Kenzie's stomach and back Kisame asked," You want me to stop? Because I will if you want me to."

"N-no you won't! HAHAHA! And this isn't going t-to work!1 EEEHAAHAHA!!" Kenzie managed to squeal this out between peals of laughter. She was very close to shedding tears she was laughing so hard. And breathing so little.

Noticing her skin turning a darker shade in colour from lack of oxygen Kisame eased up and halted the torture. Putting away the feather duster he bent over and hovered his face inches above Kenzie's. An expression of pondering on he noted," Hmmm, this method is obviously not working."

"Good job realizing that now! Unlock your stupid door so I can leave!! You failed!… And stop… being so close." Kenzie muttered that last bit with a bright pink face turned away from Kisame.

Kisame clearly heard, and noticed this change in attitude. Fighting back a dirty smirk he thought, ' Maybe those other two losers had the right idea of it. Only I will actually succeed!' Standing up with a sigh Kisame used the worse line possible to start off, "God, all that tickling actually worked up a sweat. Might as well take off my cloak, not like I really needed to wear it anyways…Ah! Much better." Having stripped off his cloak Kisame leisurely stretched his arms up above his head.

The clone holding Kenzie, being the same person, followed suit and released Kenzie. Kenzie (having a bloody nose already from the strip show) couldn't fight her perverted impulses and watched as the clone took off his cloak as well. The blood flow increased to the point where it was gushing out of the spaces between her fingers. Tilting her head back she screamed," St-stop stripping!! Please?"

"What? You think I'm taking my clothes off just for you? Puh-lease, you're not even worth my normal time, much less my bed space." Kisame remarked snidely while at the same time taking off his muscle shirt.

Kenzie just barely avoided lowering her head to glare at Kisame to argue back. If she hadn't heard the ruffling of further fabric removal she would have fallen for the trap. Instead she remarked," Exactly! You just agreed all of this is a waste of time. That means you will open your door and let me be on my way bloody merry way. Otherwise, you're just a huge hypocrite!"

Crossing their arms both Kisames chorused," Do you think I care if I'm a hypocrite?"

'POOF!' "Whether you are or not doesn't matter any more. Your time with Target Three is finished." Sasori caught both room occupants by surprise by appearing behind Kenzie and grabbing her in a bear hug.

Before Kenzie, or either of the Kisame's could reply Sasori smiled then 'POOFED' both himself and Kenzie out of the room.

Kisame stood speechless for a second at most until growling, "Dammit!!"


	13. Another Great Way to End the Day

**J: Hello me peeps! Sorry the long wait for the chapter, but it couldn't be helped....**

**K,T: Yes it could.**

**J: Yes it could....I was just lazy --" Please forgive me. Anyways, I really hope you enjoy this chapter, as well as thank SamXWasXHere, because she requested someone besides Deidara. Thank the almighty Saint Jimmy for that girl. You have no idea how big Deidara's head is getting from all the disclaimer requests. So, here you go SamXWasXHere!**

**Sas: "Looking around unamused" Why am I here?**

**SxWxH: Because I wanted you to be?**

**Sas: "Looks unamusedly at SamXWasXHere" What reason?**

**SxWxH: You need to do the disclaimer...then come with me for ice cream!**

**J,K,T:"Palmface."**

**Sas:.....Jenna does not own any of the characters named from Naruto, she only owns herself, and her friends own themselves. "Casts chakra strings on SamXWasXHere and walks away with her behind"**

**SxWxH: Uh.....Help?**

**J,K,T: "Shakes head and points to swords hovering above their heads"**

**SxWxH: "Is taken away by Sasori crying"**

**J,K,T: SORRY!!!**

* * *

**Chapter Twelve – Another Great Way to End a Day**

Sasori had taken Kenzie outside in the dying hours of the day. The second they landed he released her and asked," Did any of them succeed in hitting the trigger to your chakra?"

"N-no. Y-you're not going to try too, are you?! I've been through so much hell today! Can't we do normal stuff?" Kenzie pleaded. Sasori hadn't even done anything to her, but she was already exhausted and on the brink of not only passing out, but losing her sanity as well.

Taking out his well used notepad and pencil Sasori ignored her patheticness and asked," What methods did they try? Just so I don't repeat their stupidity."

Making a face she replied sadly," Deidara used pervertedness, Hidan used kinky pervertedness, and Kisame tried threatening, tickling, and a strip tease." At this Sasori emitted a noise that was between a snort and a snicker. It sounded pretty nasty.

Finishing his note Sasori tucked away the notepad and said to Kenzie," You'd think one of them would think to actually hurt you? Of course they can't use their brains for that. Aren't you thankful one of the men you're stuck with has intelligence?"

Eye twitch, "Do you really want my honest opinion? Because what I'm thinking will only result in more pain for me in what I can assume is a short amount of time." Kenzie blabbed all this knowing well enough that no matter what she did, she was apparently going to get hurt.

Sasori made no further indications that he was going to attack, instead he stared at Kenzie intensely without blinking. Just from that Kenzie broke out in a sweat. Trying to glare back she asked uncomfortably," Do you have to keep staring at me without blinking? It's incredibly creepy!"

"Yes I'm aware how much it bothers people. That stupid Deidara constantly yells at me to blink. But right now I'm trying to figure out whether I should bother to torture you. For all I know I could put you on the brink of death and still not get a chakra reaction. Though I don't think that will be the case. All of us from the Akatsuki wouldn't have been drawn to capturing you otherwise." Sasori stated monotonely. The information about the Akatsuki being drawn to them made Kenzie wonder what was so different about them compared to the other hundreds of students they could have kidnapped.

Utterly perplexed Kenzie scratched the back of her head and asked," Soo, what are you going to do in order to get my chakra out?"

"In you situation I would have to say the best course of action is to put you in your element."

"My element?"

"Yes. The please you feel most comfort in. Tell me, what's your favorite outdoor activity?" Sasori took a seat on the ground and stared intently at Kenzie.

Unnerved by the stare, as well as feeling awkward, Kenzie also took a seat on the ground. Looking up at the sky to avoid eye contact with Sasori Kenzie mumbled," Um, I guess if the weather was hot enough, I like swimming."

Would you rather play in a puddle or mess around with an open bon fire?"

"Who doesn't mess around with an open bon fire?" Kenzie replied excitedly, deep down was a little pyrotechnic demon waiting to be unleashed!

Recording these answers in his reopened notebook Sasori continued to question," Would you rather nap or walk? And what's your favorite colour?"

"I would rather walk around than nap, especially since I'm not capable of taking naps. My favorite colour is purple!" Kenzie easily answered these questions, though a nagging sensation in the back of her head told her that telling Sasori all and any information he needed could be a very bad idea.

Giving a curt nod he finished his note, did some critical thinking, then smiled at Kenzie to tell her," From what you've told me, your chakra will be best used with water. It would be best if starting tomorrow you work not only with me, but with Kisame as well. And when I say 'if', I mean you will be. That's all for today." His knowledge delivered Sasori got to his feet and walked back to the cave.

'Okay, that's it. I'm done trying to guess what these losers will do. Sasori threatens, babbles, inquired, then leaves. What. The. Fuck?' Thinking this Kenzie sighed and followed (at a safe distance) Sasori back.

**(J: Now, did anyone ever wonder what happened to me earlier after Sasori left me? T: "Raises hand." I was, and I'm guessing Itachi involvement? J: "Shakes head" Much worse actually. K: What's worse than Itachi? J: Think super old, powerful, and creepy. T: o.0 "Goes and cowers in corner." J: She knows the answer. K: I have a hunch. But just rewind. J: Okay.)**

**-Rewind Back to Sasori Walking to Lake-**

'Black…black…Oh look, more black! I hate being unconscious. There's nothing good to dream about. Oh wait, I'm getting some colours, I'm either waking up, or being moved, or both.' "Mmmmm…Whoever taught Sasori about pressure points needs a kick to the head." Jenna grumbled after feeling a very sore spot on the back of her neck come to life.

"I believe you have his grandmother to thank for that." A deep, chilling familiar voice answered Jenna's statement.

Opening her eyes slowly she was both relieved and unsettled to find herself in Tobi's arms. Looking around she saw the cave walls on either side passing by. 'At least I'm still safe at home base.' Smiling up at Tobi she said pleasantly," Thanks for the lift Tobi, but I'm pretty sure I can walk by myself now. And for a second there you sounded like a scary creeper."

"Aww, that hurts me to hear that Jenna. I thought you of all people would be more accepting of me." Tobi, or actually, Madara said in mock pain and sadness. This caused Jenna to freeze up in his arms and develop the facial expression of a deer caught in the headlights.

Seeing her frozen face Madara laughed," Ah, I see you've indeed forgotten that brief moment of my appearance on that delightful shopping day. That's very good. Makes me wonder if you'll be able to forget after this as well." Madara then carried Jenna into his bedroom.

Upon contact with Tobi/Madara's bed Jenna's mind kicked back into motion. Nervous eyes looking up at the orange swirly mask she squeaked," A-any particular reason why I was brought in here?"

"Not really. Unless you count me making you put on this rather appealing cat-maid outfit a particular reason?" As he spoke Madara pulled a maid's outfit out from behind his back. As well as a cat tail, a collar with a bell, and cat ears.

A flash of a familiar scene went through Jenna's mind. It was more or less the same incident that occurred for her initiation, minus the cat props and it was now Madara instead of Itachi. Itachi's heinous face was all Jenna needed for her neck hairs to stand on end as she hissed," You Uchihas are all the same! Sick, twisted, and have maid fetishes!!"

"Ahh, I see. So you're an animal channeller. The feline species at that. I thought your…hissy fits, were quite reminiscent of a cat's. If you be a good girl and do as I say, I'll remove that signature off your back." Jenna's neck hairs still stood on end, and her eyes stayed focus and alert. Even so, she swiped the maid outfit from Madara and patiently waited for him to turn around.

Faster than she did for Itachi Jenna stripped and redressed in the maid's outfit. The collar irked her the most, for she couldn't help but notice the hidden metal loop next to the bell that a leash could be attached to. To her even greater displeasure the outfit left the back wide open for everyone to see Itachi's handiwork. Arms crossed with bright red ears she grumbled," I put on the stupid outfit, now get Itachi's name off my back!!"

"On one more condition." Madara held up a finger to emphasize on his sentence.

Leering at Madara she hissed," You said you'd take it off after I put on the stupid costume!! No more conditions! I'm leaving!"

"No you're not!" 'BAM!' Madara gave Jenna a sucker punch that sent her flying into the closest wall. The wind knocked out of her caused her to go to her knees. With a gasp she managed to wheeze out," Alright, fine you jerk! What else do you want me to do?"

"Nothing complicated. Just go to Deidara's door and ask him if he has any interest in working with Tobi on the next mission." Madara replied, cool, calm and collectively.

Eye twitching Jenna squeaked," N-no way! Do you have any idea what he'll do to me after he sees me in this?!"

"I have a pretty good idea of it, yes. That's why I believe this to be good training. If you can get back from Deidara untouched, I'll know you're tough enough to handle the process of tattoo removal." Madara plopped down on his bed and layed back to relax.

Nearly crying Jenna gave in and left the room to find Deidara.

Luckily for her everyone seemed to have their bedroom doors closed. She had to turn a corner before getting to Deidara's bedroom. But it was just her luck that she bumped into Takisha around the corner. (Takisha was worn out from trying to get in better control of her chakra.) Grumbling while holding her head she didn't see Takisha's eye twitch a thousand times over.

Once the pain subsided she asked Takisha," By any chance was it Madara that put you in that play boy bunny outfit?" She wasn't surprised when Takisha's head drooped and was engulfed by gloom lines.

Raising her head enough to look at Jenna she asked glumly," Did he get to you too?"

"Yeeess! And now I have to go talk to Deidara! He's definitely going to rape me this time! Any chance you'll do it for me, then I can lie to Madara and get him to get rid of this god awful unwanted tattoo." Jenna whined/ranted/pleaded all this to Takisha in one breathe.

Putting her hands on Jenna's shoulders Takisha stared Jenna straight in the eye and answered flatly," No. I am tired. I need to make supper still. You can be a mature person and deal with this by yourself."

As Takisha continued on her way she was well aware that Jenna was pretty much on the brink of committing suicide. Not literally, just emotionally.

Slumped over Jenna finished her walk to the door of doom. Not even Itachi's Italian classroom door made her as scared as Deidara's door did at that one moment of her life. Sucking in a deep breathe Jenna raised her fist and knocked as lightly as possible. Of course Deidara still heard the almost non-existent rap and answered grumpily," What do you want, un? I'm busy!"

"Tobi wanted me to ask you something. It's not that important though, so I'll just yell through the door. Tobi wants to know if you'll work with him –" Jenna was cut off by Deidara opening the door with his mouth open to yell a negative reply.

Upon seeing what she was wearing Deidara's eyes lit up with perverted flames from hell. Leaning against the door frame he said," You could have used a different reason to come see me, un. Really all you had to do was ask. Or come right in, un."

Taking a step back Jenna put her hands up in front of her. Preparing to make a run for it she quickly explained," No, it's not like that! Tobi made me wear this! He also made me come over here to ask if you wanted to work with him on the next mission. Your answer is obviously no, so I'll go tell him." Spinning on her heel Jenna managed to get two steps away before she was stopped.

Deidara had no intention of letting an opportunity such as this escape him. Thinking fast he reached out and grabbed Jenna's hair. Pulling her back he purred (literally), "Aww, don't be like that kitten, un. Stay and keep me company."

"Let go of my hair! That hurts you jerk!" Jenna pulled a kunai out from the pouch she kept on the side of her right leg. (You never know when a kunai will be handy.) Swinging around behind her she tried to cut Deidara's arm so he'd let go. Only Deidara was holding Jenna's hair in just such a way that the kunai cut that instead of Deidara.

Jenna watched with wide eyes as her hair fell to the ground. Deidara watched as well, only his eyes stayed trained on Jenna. If there's one thing he really understood about females, it's that they hair means a lot to them.

Jenna watched until the last strand of hair fell to the ground. Once it hit the floor so did Jenna. She slumped down onto her knees and poked the pile of hair. Deidara crouched down and poked Jenna on the forehead. When she didn't respond he asked," Were you planning on growing it really long, un?"

"I was going to grow it for four years, then cut it short for two. Now I have to wait two years before I can grow it out again you jerk!" Jenna's reply came out as a really high pitched whimper.

Whimpering in front of Deidara in a maid's outfit, is a very bad thing to do. To Deidara, the sound of a young girl whimpering is the same as a cat in heat constantly standing in the "ready" position.

Deidara stood up, kicked open his door, scooped Jenna up and robotically walked towards the bed.

Jenna in turn managed to do three things.

Snap out of her state of shock after being scooped up.

Realize what Deidara was about to do.

Started kicking and flailing her arms and legs while screaming. She screamed this," LET ME GO!! ANYONE WANT TO HELP ME?! PLEEAASSE!!"

'Thud.' Went Jenna on the floor thanks to Deidara dropping her a foot short of the bed. Looking past Deidara to the door she saw the reason why he dropped her.

Kakuzu had heard Jenna's screaming, which wasn't something he wanted. For poor (not really) Kakuzu had a massive headache thanks to all the money counting he did all of the night. Having stopped the cause of the noise disturbance Kakuzu stomped back to his bedroom.

Jenna blinked once, twice, then," Oh…my…god. He wasn't wearing a face mask, hat, or cloak. He's actually kinda hot…GODDAMMIT!! WHY DIDN'T I HAVE A CAMERA?!?!" Punching herself in the head Jenna got to her feet and ran from Deidara's room. But instead of going back to Tobi, she went to her room to change. Tobi was slightly trustworthy. Madara, not even a sliver of him was trust worthy.

-25 Minutes Later in the Kitchen-

"Ugh, my head, un. Takisha-chan, can you make me some tea, un?" Deidara moaned stumbling into the kitchen.

Mostly everyone else was already seated and eating supper. Which consisted of noodles and sushi. **(T: Both of which are leftovers from past suppers. I just told them they were fresh. Picky bastards won't eat leftovers otherwise.) **Jenna smiled a little to herself at hearing this. While Takisha just glowered for having to extra work. Kenzie came in behind him, saw the food and sighed happily," Oh than God! I'm starving! I love you Takisha!" Happily hopping to where Takisha had placed her plate she totally ignored the glaring Hidan and Kisame, who were placed on either side of her.

Takisha took her own seat after giving Deidara his cup of tea. Popping a piece of sushi in her mouth she thought, ' I'm surprised Jenna hasn't thrown anything at Itachi yet. Actually, she hasn't even glanced at him…This might be a bad thing.' Just for the fun of it Takisha had placed Jenna right across from Itachi. They hadn't even blinked at each other, much less establish that the other person was there. Since Kenzie was just across from her Takisha felt safe to whisper," Kenzie. I think Jenna's mentally ill. She hasn't tried to kill Itachi yet."

"She doesn't remember what happened. Remember?" Kenzie mumbled this through a mouthful of noodles.

"Actually she does. I'll inform you later. But she remembers."

"Oh. Well, in that case. Jenna! Jenna! Do you remember what Itachi did to you the other day?" Kenzie, seeing no harm in reminding someone about something they already remember, threw a small clump of rice at Jenna to get her attention.

Rolling her eyes Jenna sighed," Yes, I do. And I'm too emotionally drained of energy to care, and/or react to his presence right now." Her statement given she went back to slurping her noodles.

Only to choke on them when Konan appeared behind her and asked," Jenna, why do you have a hood over your head?"

"At the choking everyone turned in curiosity. Except for Deidara. He just kept his cool to see how things turned out.

Her throat cleared Jenna mumbled," I'm cold, what's wrong with wearing a hood to stay warm?"

"Nothing's wrong with that. If that were the truth. Take your hood off." Konan's voice had the suspicious mother tone to it. Which was something that cannot be removed even if she was asked about her day off.

Grumbling something incoherent Jenna loosened the strings on her hood and took it off. The second it came down Konan grabbed Jenna by the shoulders, dragged her back from the table, and hauled her off to her bedroom. A second after they left the room Kisame asked," Itachi, did you do that?"

"No. I didn't Deidara did." Itachi replied before eating his last piece of sushi, then leaving.

Raising an eyebrow at Deidara, Takisha said," I'm no Itachi fanatic. But I'm pretty sure he's going to hurt you soon."

"And why do you assume this, un?" Deidara was aware that Takisha was right. Itachi only said so much, though from listening to his annoying voice long enough, Deidara learned the vocal cues of two emotions. Annoyance and anger. The vocal cue he picked up on was definitely an indication of anger.

"Pfft. That's pretty obvious you idiot. You messed with his property. The day AFTER he branded her as his property." Kisame answered for Takisha, who nodded in agreement to what was said.

Covering a yawn Deidara said tiredly," Well, he needs to learn to share anyways, un. Besides, she cut her own hair, un."

Kenzie and Takisha exchanged a look that said, 'Like Jenna would try and be a Sakura-wannabe.' To Deidara Kenzie told him," Jenna has cut her bangs before, but she'd never try to cut her own hair. She knows that it would be an epic fail. As her current hair style proves."

"Knowing her, she'll ask Konan to dye it before fixing it." Takisha randomly said, everyone (who cared about the conversation topic) turned to Takisha with a sweat drop on their heads. The information she just provided was really unnecessary.

**-In Konan's Room-**

"Do you think you can dye it before you fix it?" Jenna asked once Konan had set a towel around her shoulders to collect any hairs that fell around her neck.

Eyebrows raised Konan asked surprised," How'd you know that I bought seven different kinds of hair dye?"

Confusion on her own face she replied just as surprised," I didn't know! I just wanted to dye my hair because I like to change its colour. That's eerily convenient timing of events… Can you see into the future Konan?" Squinting her eyes in suspicion Jenna made her voice sound accusing.

Flicking her on the forehead Konan waved off Jenna's serious manner saying," Of course not. Now what colour did you have in mind?"

"Hmm…What do you have in red?" A thought had occurred to Jenna that this situation could be turned in her favor if things went right.

**-Close to an hour later-**

"What do you think Konan's doing to her head?" Kenzie asked aimlessly. Since they'd left the kitchen table no one had bothered to talk about Jenna or Konan's extended absence. Kenzie only bothered to bring up the topic when she glanced through one of Konan's magazines she'd left in the living room.

Takisha had found a modern book of recipes among the many books in the Akatsuki library. She'd located the section for desserts and was giving them her full attention. So when she replied she wasn't really aware of what she was saying," I'm sure nothing serious. A light coating of sugar, and another coating of coloured icing."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Hidan was just passing through the living room when he heard Takisha's words.

Takisha looked up from the brownie recipe she was memorizing to find Kenzie, Hidan, Deidara, and Zetsu looking at her with the recognizable ,'WTF?' expression. Confused she asked," What was the question and what did I say?"

"Never mind." Kenzie shook her head and went back to skimming through Konan's magazine.

"Ahem! May I have everyone's attention? I would like to present the newly modified Jenna. Only Takisha and Kenzie may comment." Konan announced appearing in the living room doorway. (The one that led to the hallway with her bedroom.)

The guys in the room made a face at Konan but shrugged it off. They were still going to comment if it was worth their comments. Which it actually did.

The second Jenna stepped into the living room all the guys face changed to surprised or slightly amused. For Jenna had gotten her hair dyed a very vibrant shade of red, and it was trimmed up so it was layered shortly ending around the ears. Takisha tilted her head one way, then the other, squinted, tapped her chin then concluded," It looks good. Not as nice as when your hair was long, but still good."

Kenzie had merely glanced up from the magazine to make her judgment. Her focus back on the article she'd found she said," Looks good."

Deidara startled everyone when he took off his cloak, ran up to Jenna and put it on her, stepped back and yelled," I was right, un! You could be Sasori Danna's sister!! Stay right here and I'll go get him, un." Before anyone could protest Deidara ran out of the room to get Sasori.

Eye twitching Jenna grumbled," I was hoping no one else would notice."

"…Now that I pay more attention, he is right. If you didn't look so feminine, you could even be Sasori." Kenzie remarked after putting down the magazine and studying Jenna more closely.

Making a face Jenna turned around and went to go back to her room. Only she was interrupted by Sasori (who was being shoved from behind by Deidara.) Upon seeing her Sasori slightly raised his eyebrow and questioned," Was this done intentionally?"

Jenna vigorously shook her head, stepped back and replied nervously," I swear it wasn't intentional. I chose the hair colour because I was thinking about Gaara."

That earned a long awkward silence. Takisha broke it by saying," I miss Lee a lot more than you miss Gaara, but you don't see me getting a bowl cut."

"Meh. I'm ignoring you, and going to bed." Jenna mumbled with her head down. Keeping her sights lowered she maneuvered around Sasori and Deidara.

Once she was out of the room Zetsu allowed himself a big gruesome smile. Hidan noticed and asked," What's got you grinning?"

"Hehehe. I wonder how she'll feel when I wake her up in two hours." Was all he chuckled before sinking down into the ground.

Realizing what Zetsu was talking about Hidan broke out laughing and left to do some more praying. Deidara and Sasori knew what was being spoken of as well, but that didn't mean they were going to tell the clearly confused Takisha and Kenzie. Smiling to themselves they also headed to their rooms.

Kenzie turned to Takisha and asked," Why do I get the feeling something bad is going to happen tomorrow"

"Good, it wasn't just me then. I think Jenna's paranoia is rubbing off too much." Takisha sighed in relief, though not entirely feeling better. At the back of her mind Takisha couldn't help but feel like an animal about to be shot by a hunter.


	14. Akatsuki Take Over

**Chapter Thirteen – Akatsuki Take Over**

**P: Hello readers. I am Pein, Leader of the evil organization known as the Akatsuki. Usually Jenna, Mackenzie, or Takisha would open the chapter. However, they are a bit…"Looks over at Jenna, Kenzie, and Takisha who are tied up by rope and gagged by cloths" tied up at the moment. So this chapter will be conducted by me.**

**Ko: "Clears throat."**

**P: And my partner Konan.**

**Ko: AND everyone else in the Akatsuki…except for Hidan.**

**P: What?! I never said they could.**

**Ko: We have an on going bet to see who's segment the readers like most. Winner gets to choose dinner for the next week.**

**P: …Alright, but I get to be in on it.**

**Ko: Already done. We also drew names to see what order we go in.**

**P: "Glares" Fiiine. Who's going first?"**

**Ko: Actually you are. So stop glaring and get writing.**

**P: Nyahnyahnnnayah.**

**Ko: Are you making fun of me?**

**P: No, those are my writing noises.**

**Ko: Uh huh… Just get writing.**

**P: Yes, I'm starting now.**

The next morning started just as yesterday had. Screaming alarm clocks waking the girls up at 5:30 in the morning. And just like yesterday Takisha threw hers against the wall… Just because she could.

Stumbling out of bed Takisha cursed, grumbled and moaned at the not present Itachi. Toddling down the hallway to go outside she was stopped by Konan's voice in the kitchen," Teeheehee, my leader-kun's going to love this wake up call. What man wouldn't love waking up to a hot woman covered in whip cream and strawberries? Teeheehee."

**(Ko: "Slap." Stop making me sound like a bubble brained air head! P: No! This is my written segment, and I will write whatever I want. And I want you to wake me up covered in whip cream and strawberries. Ko: I'll get you back for this when it's my turn **_**Leader-kuns**_** P: "Shivers.")**

In Takisha's mind she could only think 'TMI! TMI!' It was displayed upon her face by her left eye twitching constantly.

Kenzie (who had buried her alarm clock underneath the mattress) was making her way to the exit down the other hallway when a particular sound caught her sleepy attention. Stopping in front of Kisame's door she found that it was already open a crack. Unable to resist she leaned forward to peek through the opening. What she saw caused her ears and face to turn bright red. For now she knew that her beloved Kisame slept only in his cartoon fish covered boxers.

Quietly backing up in her mind she could only think, 'Well…That woke me up faster than Weasel-Butt's stupid alarm clock.' Moving quickly she made sure not to make any noses to send Kisame flying out of his room.

**-Outside in the Woods-**

Itachi outwardly showed no reaction to Takisha's clearly disturbed face, and Kenzie's blushing tomato face. Though he did allow annoyance to show to tell them how he felt about Jenna's absence. An absence he'd expected, but still did not like.

Kenzie managed to compose herself first and take notice of the empty spot on her right side. Looking around to see if she wasn't hiding somewhere Kenzie asked out loud," Where's Jenna?"

"On guard duty for another two minutes. Her shift ends at 5:35. If she's any later than that, I have the right to hurt her more than usual." Itachi answered Kenzie's question almost as if he was bored with having to explain.

This broke Takisha out of her state of petrified disgust. Confused she asked for clarification." What do you mean guard duty? Leader never said anything about us doing guard duty."

"It wasn't the Great and Incredible Leader's decision. It was Zetsu's. He thought it would be better training for her endurance to make her stay up all night to guard. Then come straight to me for more training." As Itachi explained all this Kenzie and Takisha thought to themselves,' Thank Saint Jimmy we didn't get partnered with Zetsu.'

Takisha opened her mouth to tell Itachi that the likelihood of Jenna showing up on time wasn't 100 percent, instead Jenna's voice came out screaming," ANYONE DOWN THERE?! I COULD USE SOME ASSISTANCE!!"

Stepping back from the tree they craned their necks back as far as physically possible. It took maybe two seconds for them to spot Jenna clinging to a tree branch for dear life. Sweat dropping Takisha cupped her hands to her mouth to yell," Jenna! What are you doing up there?!"

"Shortest explanation. Zetsu abandoned me here an hour ago. The bastard told me it would the best view point advantage for guard duty! AND, right before he left me here, he told me YOU told him the tree was best Itachi!!" Jenna yelled back as loudly as she could to be heard.

Takisha and Kenzie made a face at Itachi. Itachi ignored them to go walking up the trunk of the tree. Watching as he went Kenzie noted," You know, this reminds me of those books and shows where a fire fighter goes up a tree to rescue a cat."

"You're right…With the exception that Itachi kills people and starts fires and Jenna won't be purring in his arms after she's rescued." Takisha ended her statement with a yawn. The mental image made Kenzie cough and snicker at the same time.

Up in the tree Jenna could faintly see Kenzie laughing at something Takisha must have said. Having paid attention to them she did not see Itachi come up behind her. Aware that Jenna would likely jump rather than be saved by Itachi, he acted fast and grabbed Jenna in a bear hug.

Jenna froze, looked down at the height difference, and went limp. This did not please Itachi, for he preferred a struggle. **(Ko: Itachi. T: Hn. Ko: Why do you like a struggle? Another one of your kinks? I: ………That is non of your concern. Ko: You just confirmed what I said by denying it. I: "Glare.") **Tightening his hold as a precaution Itachi leaned forward and planted a light kiss on Jenna's neck. Needless to say the reaction was instantaneous; it included much thrashing, swearing, and blushing. This all brought a content smirk to Itachi's face. Bringing her down the tree he made a mental list of many other things to do…to Jenna that day. Once they touched down on the ground training commenced as usual.

And while all that went on many more, interesting, things took place back in the lair.

**-Back in the Lair-**

The Great, Incredible, and handsome Leader lay sprawled diagonally across his black silk sheet bed. **(Ko: The ****real**** reason why I was up before him. He always takes up more space that way.) **He was having blissful dreams of ruling the world with the power of the jinchurikis behind him. Konan stood next to him clad in a tight sexy black leather outfit. He was king, and she his queen. All was beautiful, the grass a vibrant and healthy shade of green. The skies crystal blue with white fluffy clouds in the shapes of strawberries…'Strawberries?'

All Pein could smell was the delicious aroma of strawberries. Cracking an eye open he was blessed with the blurry sight of a half emptied bowl of strawberries, and a can of whip cream. Closing his eye again he thought,' Hmm. No Konan beside me. Strawberries. And whip cream. Oooooh. Hehehehe.' Rolling over Pein sleepily purred," Mmm, Konan, are you covered in nothing but fruit and whipped cream?"

"I don't know, open your eyes and tell me." Konan purred back, her voice full of enticement.

Pein eagerly opened his eyes to find Konan -----------------

**I: Leader, I believe it is my turn.**

**P: B-but…I just…Let me finish!**

**I: We agreed upon 15 minutes of writing each Leader.**

**P: Goddamn the rules. Fine! "Shoves the notebook at Itachi."**

**I: "Watches Pein storm off. Looks back at Jenna with evil little smirk."**

**J: "Glares and tries to yell through gag."**

**-10 Minutes in the future-**

"I can't believe that jerk threw us into the lake AGAIN!!" Takisha screamed entering the cave dripping wet. Kenzie and Jenna walked in behind her, looking just as disgruntled as Takisha.

Kenzie, still half asleep despite the exercise and freezing cold swim, shrugged it off and toddled off to her room to change. Jenna, dark bags under her eyes, yawned while saying," I think that's going to be regular treatment. Should start wearing a bathing suit under your clothes. I'm skipping breakfast, wake me up at lunch." With a tired wave she trudged off to her room.

Takisha, left all by herself, let out a little grumble of displeasure and stomped off to her room to change. At the moment she started moving Itachi walked into the room. His deep onyx eyes scanned the area to check for anyone else. No one in sight he undid and removed his slightly damp cloak. Throwing it over his shoulder he thought to himself,' What shall I do today? Beat Deidara silly or torment my kitten some more? … I'll wait until she falls asleep. Leaving me time to teach that retard whose property he messed with. But first, a cup of tea.' His mind made up Itachi walked off to the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea.

**-Going to Deidara's Room-**

"Nooo, don't leave me Danna! I love you too much!!" Deidara's arms stretched out in an attempt to catch hold of the Sasori in his dreams. **(D: What the fuck, un?! Everyone else: "Laughing hysterically." I: My segment. I write what I want. D: You'll be sorry when it's my turn, un! I: Hn.)**

In his attempt to capture his true love Deidara flailed around too much, thus causing him to fall off the bed. This then woke him up.

Eyes half open Deidara yawned," Almost had him, un. I'll catch him for sure in my next dream, un!" The thought of that pleasant dream made him want to crawl back into bed. But he couldn't. He'd pulled all his sheets onto the floor, which made them dirty, which meant he would become dirty if he slept in them.

Sighing in defeat Deidara got to his feet, pulled on a pair of clean boxers and started the long walk to the kitchen.

Going into the kitchen he found Itachi at the table and Takisha at the stove working on breakfast. Which looked and smelt like French toast. Unable to restrain his stupidity Deidara snuck up behind Takisha and purred," Hello Takisha-chan. What do you think of my new ensemble?"

Takisha, aloes being naturally blonde, turned around just to make Deidara shut up. Only she ended up getting a nose bleed. A nose bleed that dripped onto a piece of French toast. Takisha stared at it for a moment then etched a faint 'X' onto the bread. To explain to no one in particular she said out loud," That will be given to Zetsu…Now go put a shirt on before one of your……Wait, never mind. You don't have any chest hair to get into the food. But still, go put on a shirt you jerk!!" Using the clean frying pan that was going to have eggs on it, Takisha shooed Deidara away from the stove.

Snickering Deidara scooted away from the stove to just go sit down. He didn't get the chance. For Itachi had finished his cup of tea. Leaving his hands available to grab a fistful of Deidara's hair.

"What the hell, un?! Let go of my!!!" Deidara squealed and screamed this like a little girl.

Twisting the hair around his fist for a tighter hold Itachi pulled Deidara towards him to hiss menacingly," You're coming with me. I have a lesson to teach you."

Takisha watched in mute fear and amazement as Itachi dragged Deidara by his hair out of the kitchen. Once they were out in the hallway she mumbled," That was definitely a Kodak moment. Should ask Konan for her camera to keep handy. That or steal one from Tobi's 30 bazillion cameras. He won't miss one."

**To: Tobi's turn now Itachi!**

**I: Hn "Throws notebook at Tobi, who catches it and eagerly starts writing in rainbow coloured ink.'**

**-In Tobi's Super Awesome Cool Room-**

Tobi lay happily dreaming of bunny rabbits, chocolate, and world domination. His dream was rudely interrupted by Deidara-sempai's really high pitched scream of agony.

Mumbling about the chocolate bunny rabbits Tobi pulled himself out of bed and stretched out tall. More awake Tobi zipped into his favorite clothes, and his favorite mask. **(D: Wha- You have more than one mask, un? To: Of course Deidara-sempai! There's a red mask, and a blue mask, and a green mask, and a… D: "Annoyed face" I'm sorry I asked, un.)**

Opening his door he heard Deidara-sempai's girly shrill much clearer. Interested in what was happening he followed the cries, sniffles, and pleading all the way to Zetsu's room. The door was open a crack so Tobi saw no reason not to open the door the rest of the way and call out," Deidara-sempai! Is something wrong?"

Tobi was amused to find Deidara being hung upside down over a man eating plant with Itachi holding onto his ankle. The plant, having felt the heat from Deidara's body, was stretched out as far as possible with it's mouth wide open. Smiling behind his mask Tobi laughed," Uh oh, Deidara-sempai was bad again. Don't kill him Itachi. Deidara-sempai still needs to do missions and stuff. Bye bye." Giving a friendly wave Tobi skipped along to the kitchen for breakfast.

He found that Deidara-sempai's girly screaming didn't only wake him up. Kakuzu-kun, Hidan-kun, and Kisame-kun were all in the kitchen looking very grumpy. They all glanced up, grumbled, and went back to drinking their tea and eating their French toast.

Jumping into his seat Tobi asked happily," What's for breakfast Takisha-chan?"

"Your favorite, French toast. I made yours special Tobi. See?" Takisha put down a plate of French toast cut into the shape of the Akatsuki cloud.

Clapping his hands Tobi cheered," These are great Takisha-chan! Thank you, thank you!!" Takisha pat Tobi affectionately on the top of his head then went back to work cooking more French toast for the others.

"Hey Takisha, who's outfit are you wearing today?" Kenzie asked casually coming into the kitchen rubbing sleep crusties from her eyes.

The sudden clattering of a frying pan dropping onto the floor indicated that Takisha was not happy. Covering a secret smile with her hand Kenzie sat down beside Tobi. "It's Kisame-kun's turn Takisha-chan."

"Yeah, but don't worry. My choice of outfit is a little more decent than everyone else's. Emphasis on little." Kisame scared the crap out of Kenzie by popping up behind her.

Glaring back over her shoulder she growled," Let me guess, sequined green pants and sea shells?" She threw Kisame's plate of French toast on the table, uncaring whether they got all over the place.

Kisame ignored the fashion in which he'd received the French toast and proceeded to slather it in maple syrup. Taking a bite he replied," No. Green sequined short short mini skirt, and coconuts. Bwahaha!" Kisame and all the other males (except Tobi) erupted in laughter. Kenzie was to busy enjoying her French toast to care.

Tobi got to his feet (the French toast gone from his plate) and hugged Takisha from behind. To others it was normal Tobi behavior, to Takisha, it was another nightmare. Tobi had used the hug as an excuse to whisper in her ear," Maybe I should get some pictures of you in that outfit as well? But today my sights are set on something else. So you can relax, for today." With a deep dark little snicker Madara let go of Takisha and grabbed Kenzie in a bear hug.

Restraining from coughing after swallowing a huge portion of chewed French toast Kenzie wheezed," Tobi what are you doing?"

"Does Kenzie-chan want to see my endless supply of pie?" Tobi asked in his "normal" voice.

Takisha overheard, as did everyone else, on a regular day she would have warned Kenzie. But after her moment of betrayal, Takisha decided she could endure the psychological pain she and Jenna had experienced yesterday. Turning her back, Takisha listened to Tobi lead Kenzie off to his bedroom.

**D: Alright! My turn, un!**

**To: But I'm not done Deidara-sempai!**

**D: Too bad, un. Everyone only gets fifteen minutes. You've had seventeen minutes, un. So hand it over, un. "Hold out hand for notebook."**

**To: "Looks at notebook, looks at Deidara's hand…Runs."**

**D: Wha – Hey! Get back here, un!! "Chases after him."**

**J, K,T: "Watches Deidara chase Tobi in a musical montage manner." (Recommended to put on music player on random and use imagination.)**

**D: That's it, un! "Pulls out piece of clay and hucks it at Tobi's head." Now give me the notebook, or I'll blow your brains out, un!!**

**J, K,T: "In their minds" THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!! "Laughing through gags."**

**D: "Glares at girls" I know what you were thinking, un! Now give me the notebook Tobi!**

**To: "Hands over notebook with tears streaming down eye hole of mask."**

**D: Let my awesome and incredible writing commence, un!**

'Slam!' Went Deidara's door behind him, he'd just been released from the weasel man's clutches. His luscious skin was marred by several bruises, cuts, and scrapes. Deidara's lustrous long blonde hair was knotted and frayed almost beyond repair. Worst yet, his handsome face had been ruined by a hideous black eye. Leaning against the door Deidara cursed under his breathe, "Damn that Itachi, un. He totally wrecked my hard work that I accomplished with beauty sleep. Now I'll have to go to bed early for the next two or three days, un. He won't get away with it. And I know exactly what to do, un,"

An evil smirk upon his face Deidara hastily got dressed and fixed up his appearance. Going to his dresser Deidara opened first the second drawer half way, then the bottom drawer ¾ of the way, and finally the second last drawer was pulled open all the way. A notable click was heard from the side. Unknown to all the other Akatsuki members, Deidara had turned his dresser into a puzzle box. And Deidara had just opened the secret compartment in the side. In the secret compartment Deidara kept all his valuable and devious items. One very important item was something he'd kept for future purposes of his own. However, that item would be perfect for what he had planned. The item thus mentioned had been obtained from the dimension they'd taken the girls from. It was a small little bottle of medication, the label of the bottle read V.I.A.G.R.A.

Tucking his beautiful bottle away in his cloak Deidara just needed to wait for the perfect opportunity. Feeling better already Deidara went out to find something to kill time.

The moment he stepped into the hallway he heard one source of distraction that came from the direction of Tobi's room. It sounded like," WHAT THE FUCK?! I AM NOT WEARING THAT!!!"

His curiosity too strong Deidara scuttled off to Tobi's room. Coming to the door he had to stop and debate whether to crack the door open, or just listen in. His decision was made by Kenzie practically ripping the door off it's hinges in her mad dash for freedom. Deidara stared in amazement as Kenzie zipped past him clad in what he could only describe as a skimpy nurse's outfit.

Deidara, having rarely seen such an arousing sight (in reality) responded immediately. By jumping on her back. To both their surprise, she didn't fall over. Which was what he'd hoped to happen.

Swiveling her head Kenzie tried to get a good look at the perv, seeing it was Deidara she calmed down and asked happily," Oh Deidara! Do you like what I'm wearing?"

Deidara, so deep in the clutches of his perverted mind that he couldn't speak, simply nodded his head. A blush coming on her face Kenzie asked, "Would, would you like to play Doctor, Deidara? I promise I'll follow all the orders you give." Blood already dripping from his nose Deidara nodded his head a tiny bit.

Supremely happy Kenzie made sure to hold onto her beloved man so he wouldn't fall off, and took off to her room.

Before they got there Deidara was snapped from his reverie by another familiar voice screaming," WHAT THE HELL?! GET OFF ME ITACHI!! I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!!"

Hopping off of Kenzie's back he instructed," Wait here, un. I'm going to get us another playmate that will need medical attention, un."

"I'll wait right here Doctor Sexy." Kenzie gave a salute and stood at attention military style.

Deidara straightened his back and marched into Jenna's room. What he found made Deidara want to puke. Poor Jenna, the weakest of all the people in the cave, lay pinned to her bed with Itachi on top trying to remove her clothing. Seeing the strong and marvelous Deidara brought hope back to Jenna's tear stained face. Reaching out she pleaded," Deidara please help me! Itachi is trying to take me away from you again."

"Don't worry, un. It's just a clone, un. See?" To prove his point he threw a kunai, causing the pathetic Itachi clone to vanish in smoke.

More tears coming from her eyes out of relief Jenna leapt from her bed straight into Deidara's arms. Holding her securely he purred comfortingly," There, there, un. You're safe. Why don't you come play a game with Kenzie and I, un?"

"Yes, yes! Of course! Itachi wouldn't dare try to hurt me again with you there Deidara. Let me just change into something more…suitable." Her tears were gone and replaced with smoldering eyes of seduction. Skipping over to her dresser Jenna pulled out the maid's outfit he'd seen her in the other day.

Already drooling from the memory Deidara watched eagerly as Jenna slowly started to strip. He would have watched the whole show, but his thoughts were interrupted yet again by a different voice calling out," LET ME GO SASORI!! I TOLD YOU THOUSANDS OF TIMES NOT TO COME INTO THE KITCHEN WHEN I'M COOKING!!"

Sending a silent prayer of thanks up to the God that loved him that day Deidara instructed Jenna," After you've changed go to my room with Kenzie, un. That's an order, un."

"Anything you say love." Jenna blew Deidara a kiss and sighed as he left the room.

Kenzie waved after Deidara as he zipped past her and went towards the kitchen. He almost ran straight into Takisha, who was being controlled by Sasori. Seeing that it was Deidara Takisha quickly wrapped her arms around him since Sasori was only controlling her legs. Doing her best not to move Takisha asked through strained teeth, "You have to help me, please? He's going to turn me into a puppet or something!"

Deidara looked over Takisha's head at Sasori, who was looking a bit…lustful. Aware of what was happening Deidara told Sasori," Danna, you _were_ told before not to go into the kitchen when Takisha-chan is cooking. You have no right to molest, rape and change her into a puppet, un."

"But…kitchen…apron." Were Sasori's only words in his self defense. **(Ko: If it hasn't become clear, Sasori has a thing for women that he sees wearing an apron and cooking at the stove. Weird as it sounds, it's true.)**

Holding Takisha, Deidara shook his head and scolded," No, bad Danna. Detach your strings and go back to your room, un."

Emitting the tiniest of sighs Sasori cut his chakra strings and slouched forward. Avoiding eye contact with Deidara he made his depressed way back to his room. Before he was out of ear shot both Takisha and Deidara heard Sasori mutter," One of these times she won't be lucky enough to have someone to save her in time. That will be the best day of my existence." Hearing this both blondes shivered, Takisha clung onto Deidara tighter.

Once he was safely in his room Takisha sighed in relief. Smiling gratefully at Deidara she said," Thanks, that was too close. Remind me that I owe you one sometime."

She intended to go back to the kitchen to finish preparing lunch so she didn't have to deal with it later. Deidara grabbed hold of her arm to stop her. Bestowing his most seductive smile upon her he asked in a sweet whisper," Can't you repay me now and join your friends in a game, un. I'm sure no one will tamper with the food, un."

"As charming, handsome, and sexy as you are, I can't leave food unattended for too long in a place crawling with S-rank criminals. You know that just as well as I do." Takisha had playfully traced her finger up and down Deidara's chest during the time she was talking with a pout put into her lower lip.

Dramatically sighing Deidara surrendered to her logic. A hand over his heart he moaned," Very well. I shall do my best to enjoy Kenzie and Jenna's affections without you. But, how about you do me, and your friend Jenna, a favor. If possible could you slip this into the food Itachi shall receive? It's a very strong laxative, nothing more I swear. And…Maybe after supper you could make some spare time for your beloved Deidara, un?" Deidara handed the little blue pill while conveniently placing his thumb over the name etched into it. Takisha gave Deidara a crooked smile and swiftly took the pill from his hand. Glancing around to make sure no one was watching Takisha gave Deidara a small peck on the cheek, a wink, and disappeared back into the kitchen.

Shaking his head with a pleased expression Deidara scurried off to his bedroom where noises of a pillow fight had already started.

**Ko: Alright, your time is way past over.**

**D: What?! "Checks the time." How'd I get a whole half hour, un?**

**H: We were enjoying most of it. So we didn't bother saying anything. Be grateful you jerk.**

**D :… Thanks, un? "Happy but still baffled."**

**Ko: Look what you did to them! "Points to Jenna, Takisha, and Kenzie lying unconscious on the floor with foam coming out of their mouths."**

**D: They're the ones using their imaginations, un.**

**H: Hn, they're just weak minded. "Poking them while saying this."**

**Ko: -.-" Right, well, since this is getting very long we're breaking this into another chapter. Just so you guys can enjoy all of it, and remember, this is a contest so please wait until the next chapter before choosing the winner.**


	15. Akatsuki Take Over Part 2

**Chapter Thirteen – Akatsuki Take Over Part 2**

**D: "Grumble" I had so much more beautiful things to write,un.**

**Ko: "Shakes head." Sasori, it's your turn. Please try to refrain from anything perverted.**

**S: Hn. I already know what I'm doing. Starting with most of what just happened, not happening.**

**Ko, H, D: Most?**

**S: "Tiny smile grows in the corner of his mouth."**

**P: Since no one seems to remember, non of the Akatsuki members are owned by anyone else except Misashi Kishimoto.  
**

** -Rewind to Five Minutes Ago-**

Takisha, dressed in a simple outfit of a T-shirt and sweat pants, and a recently added apron, stood at the counter next to the fridge. It was nearly entirely quiet except for the sound of Takisha's knife chopping up celery. There was already a pot on the stove boiling broth, carrots, chicken, and beef. She was making enough soup for everyone to have seconds, and still have some left over for when they want a snack. The most annoying thing about living with a group of guys is that she never knew when one of them would pop up and –

"Hello Takisha."

"AUGH!! Dammit Sasori! I almost cut my finger off! Make some noise when you come in…Wait…Actually, just leave. We both know you're not supposed to be in here." Takisha put down the knife and faced Sasori to point towards the exit.

Sasori made no comment, nodded his head and turned around. Takisha, believing that Sasori was actually going to leave, turned back to her cutting. Sasori didn't bother turning around to cast his chakra strings over his shoulder. The clattering of the knife and Takisha's frustrated scream indicated that he'd cast his strings successfully. Looking back he smirked and went up behind Takisha. Embracing her gently from behind he cooed," Finally, I can make some new puppets. Waiting has been very hard, you know. But it will be well worth the time wasted. Come along now my new prize. We have work to do."

Breathing erratically Takisha squeaked," Wha-How? But, Leader told you you're not allowed to make us into puppets!! Or kill us in general." Her heart was beating so fast that Sasori could faintly hear it hitting the walls of her ribcage.

Stroking Takisha's hair he sighed," I sent one of my less valuable puppets out disguised as the Kyuubi's host. The only people remaining in the cave for the next four hours are me, you, and the other two who shall be my puppets." Finished explaining Sasori led Takisha out of the kitchen.

Heading down the hallway a head of Sasori Takisha was able to keep a look out for Jenna and Kenzie. If they were lucky enough they could run fast enough to get out of reach of Sasori's chakra strings. As if beckoned by her thoughts Jenna appeared from around the corner. Seeing Takisha's pale petrified face Jenna quickly back tracked and ran. Sweat dropping Takisha thought,' Gee, thanks for staying long enough to at least think about helping me…Hopefully she has the brain process to warn Kenzie…I won't have my hopes up for that.'

Sasori didn't bother to stop at Jenna's sudden appearance and disappearance. He could deal with her once his first puppet was finished. Continuing onwards he asked Takisha," Is there anything in particular you'd like to be used for? Weapon, shield, or decoration?"

"How about NOTHING! I'd like to remain a living human being, that would be the easiest thing for you to create. All you have to do is let me go!" Takisha yelled her answer, not just because she was trying to get her opinions through Sasori's wooden head, but also so Kenzie might hear and realize Sasori was going on a puppet making spree.

Sasori smiled at Takisha's back, it was so pathetic to see someone's desperation. She should be more grateful, he was going to make her immortal and a lot more useful to the Akatsuki cause. Sure cooking skills were desperately needed, but weapons to catch the jinchurikis hosts were needed even more. Leading her into his room he told her quivering body," Don't worry, I'll knock you out before I kill you."

"Wha-" 'Thunk' Takisha collapsed to the floor after being whacked in the back of the neck. Closing the door Sasori stated out loud to himself," Let's see if I can't get this done before two hours." **(Ko: It would normally take much, much longer for Sasori to make a puppet, but due to limited time it'll be a very quick process.)**

** -Meanwhile in Jenna's Room-**

"Got my clothes, check. Got my money, check. Got my tools, check. Now I just need to keep my life before leaving the cave, and I should be home free… To get lost. Kenzie better be ready to go, or I'm leaving her." Jenna grumbled while pulling her bulging knapsack onto her back. As she'd scurried back to her room she'd ran into Kenzie, who was heading towards the kitchen. She'd stopped Kenzie, squeaked and shrieked at her, then ran off to her room.

Kenzie had stood in the hallway for a minute or so before her brain was able to filter, slow down, and process exactly what Jenna had just babbled at her. Her eye twitched for a second, and then she got into gear.

When Jenna came to her bedroom door a minute right after she closed her own bulging knapsack she announced," I'm good, but…should we really be leaving Takisha behind like this?"

"Who was it that said the future generation is more important?" Jenna asked with an undertone that dared Kenzie to deny what she'd just quoted.

Kenzie made a 'smart ass' expression, sighed then cheered," Okay! Let's run for it now while we still can!" Jenna gave a curt nod and followed after Kenzie out the door and into the hallways.

The hallways that were twisted and funky looking. Gloom lines developing over their heads Kenzie and Jenna groaned simultaneously," Damn genjutsus."

A faint sound of a kind of rattle came to their attention. The hairs rising on the back of their necks they watched as Sasori's puppet disguise, Hiroku, creeped along the twisted hallway. Clinging to each other Kenzie squeaked," H-how is it moving if Sasori is working on Takisha?"

"Wh-why are you asking me? I'm not an expert on all the freaky things that happen around here!" Jenna squeaked back, even more terrified than Kenzie, if that was possible.

Clutching each other to the point of strangling they didn't dare to move. They wouldn't be able to even if they wanted to. The genjutsu they'd been ensnared in had paralyzed them from the waist down. Hiroku slowly came closer and closer. As the distance between him and them grew smaller they heard Hiroku start to laugh. Not cackling, chuckling, or snickering. Just pure uncontrollable laughter. Laughter at the faces of terror, laughter at what was about to happen them.

By the time Hiroku was one foot away from the, both Jenna and Kenzie had tears and snot coming out of their eyes and nose. Jenna's teeth were also chattering. Hiroku stopped at one foot distance. The puppet did not move, did not laugh, and did not talk.

Trying to calm down Kenzie whispered," A-are you going to kill us now, or what? Because what you're doing right now is really, really cruel Sasori."

Hiroku's head tilted, there came a loud ground and the back of Hiroku opened. Instead of Sasori poking his head out, Takisha came out smiling. Blinking a few times neither Jenna or Kenzie could comprehend what was happening. Takisha's head continued to come out, just her head extended on a thick wooden pole.

This new development sank in slowly, you could tell that it was sinking in when their faces went pale, their eyes went wide and their breathing became labored. In total it took seven seconds for them to realize it was just Takisha's head smiling at them. So terrified that they actually started screaming, and the will to survive combined with adrenaline helped them break the genjutsu's hold on their legs. High tailing it at super speed they didn't notice Hiroku fade, along with Takisha's head on the stick.

They didn't care where they ran, as long as they could get away from Sasori's symbol of their doom.

Turning one corner, and then another, they never realized they were running right back to where Hiroku had been. The genjutsu may have been broken on their body, but it still held their minds, thus causing them to just run around in a circle. The real purpose of the genjutsu was to keep them in one location and to tire them out.

Which it did…For two hours. They ran around in circles crying their eyes out for two hours. After the two hours the genjutsu wore off and allowed Kenzie and Jenna to fall to the ground. Panting hard Jenna wheezed," Please tell me…we just ran around…for nothing."

"Too tired…To answer…Wake me up…Once you figure it out." Kenzie replied already starting to fall asleep. Sasori had thought of this as well. If all the aimless running around didn't knock them out, then there was the second genjutsu to do that.

Kenzie lay up against the wall, her eyes closing. Turning her head to look down the hall where the exit shown daylight in her direction she saw the silhouette of Sasori and his new puppet that looked like Takisha. Only tricked out with a thousand knives…And an apron. The apron addition seemed to stick out the most in her fading mind. 'Sasori…has a…kitchen women fetish…O…m…g.'

The next time Jenna opened her eyes she found herself on an operating table. Struggling against the straps that held her down she groaned," What the hell?! SASORI!!"

"There's no need to yell. I'm right here." Jenna craned her neck to the best of her abilities to see Sasori standing above her head.

When she finally wiggled into a comfortable position to see him she found herself facing a bone saw. Struggling against the straps again she pleaded," Couldn't you have killed me first while I was unconscious? I mean, some compassion wouldn't be such a bad thing right now!"

"Sorry, I already used that up on Takisha and Kenzie. Don't worry, it'll only hurt for the first few minutes until you bleed to death." Sasori said sweetly and activated the bone saw.

Jenna's screaming for mercy couldn't be heard above the whine of the machine that cut her into pieces.

**Ko: "Covered in ropes and messed up hair." Alright! My turn you jerks! You are all DEAD MEAT!!!**

**D: Why do you think we tried to tie you up, blow you up, and feed you to Zetsu, un?**

**Ko: You go after Pein he-she. "Swipes notebook from Sasori."**

**-Lunch Time-**

"Oi, it's feeding time you pigs." Takisha yelled poking her head into the living room where all the male Akatsuki members sat watching the newest episode of 'Grey's Anatomy.' There came a loud chorus of whining and booing.

Crossing her arms Takisha ordered," Into the kitchen, now! I didn't make you pigs in blankets for nothing."

"WOOT!!" Was the group response as all the Akatsuki members streamed into the kitchen in their tight leather pants that show their boyfriends they sexy butts.

Of course everyone had seated themselves with their loves in order to feed each other. Kakuzu was force feeding Hidan, **(H,Kak: FUCK YOU!) **Deidara was trying to nip at Itachi's ear as he ate Deidara's serving of croissant wrapped hot dog. **(D: "Frothing at mouth.")** Sasori, Tobi, Zetsu, and Kisame had taken their seats at the straight end of the table in order to not throw up their food. Which wasn't very easy since the table wasn't long enough.

Takisha grabbed the plate with food reserved for her two friends, the leader and HER play thing. **(Ko: You read that right. "Evil smirk.") **Doing her best not to gag on her way out Takisha quickly bolted to the large room she shared with Jenna and Kenzie.

The chamber was basically five rooms combined into one. Since the two couples shared rooms it left extra room for the girls. Opening the door Takisha sighed in relief to see her friends being herself. Completely decked out in pink halter tops and mini skirts they sat on the large bed covered in a pink comforter that was covered in hearts. Jenna lay on her stomach painting Gaara's initials on her finger nails, only in pink and black instead of purple and pink. And Kenzie sat on the end flipping through the hottest girly girl magazine. Skipping over with the tray she called out," Hey girls, brought you some lunch." **(All guys: "Laughing at eye twitching girls.")**

"B-but, I just painted my nails Tee Tee." Jenna pouted seeing one of her favorite things and not able to have it. She'd developed the horrible pout when it had sunk in that she couldn't attack her Gaagaa when she was on her hormone highs.

Kenzie, holding onto her vegetarian life style, looked disdainfully at the hot dogs wrapped in croissant. Takisha saw this and pointed to the group of regular croissants. Smiling kindly Kenzie grabbed them and scarfed em down. Lunch time was the only time Kenzie didn't restrain her eating to keep her calorie intake to a minimum.

Putting down Jenna's portion of pigs in blankets she gave a little wave and left. The door closing behind her Takisha made her happy way to Konan's room where beautiful romantic music could be heard through the door. Knocking first Takisha called out," Hey boss lady, I have lunch for you and your attendant!"

"You may come in Takisha." Konan's voice answered from the other side.

Takisha pushed open the door and entered the room clad in purple and periwinkle decorations. There was a purple shag carpet on the floor, periwinkle wicker love seat, and of course, purple and periwinkle silk coverings for everything on the bed. At the moment Takisha entered she found Konan lounging on her favorite periwinkle futon wearing her favorite leather corset ensemble. Her attendant, Pein, knelt next to her head with a bowl of grapes to feed her. Accustomed to seeing this display of servant-master relationship Takisha simply commented," Pein, new outfit?" She was questioning towards Pein's leather underwear he was wearing. The only thing he was wearing. His upper torso was covered in scars from the whip Konan held in her hand.

Smiling Konan answered (since Pein was forbidden to talk without permission) "Yes, so glad you noticed. It was really hard to find it, but it was worth all the work. Don't you think?"

"Definitely, goes great with all his piercings. And here is your lunch madam. Hot dogs rolled in cheese and croissant. Bon appetite. And please let Pein eat at least two. He can't do his job very well if he's half starved to death." Takisha handed the tray of food to Pein who gave Takisha pleading eyes of desperation. Having been met with those eyes before Takisha easily ignored them and headed out.

After lunch it was time to meditate. **(Ko: Just cause I've changed some things doesn't mean they get off from training.) **Then came Sasori's lessons. Which have been very brutal since Deidara started to hit on him. Just thinking about yesterday's lesson made Takisha cringe. He tried to teach Takisha concentration by putting an apple on her head and telling her to dodge his poison coated tail without letting the apple fall. Every time the apple fell she had to do 10 push ups. Her arms felt like lead by the end of the two hour training session. According to Jenna and Kenzie their training was just as bad. Kenzie's was a bit nicer since Kisame helped out with her lesson.

Heading back to the kitchen to clean up the mess left on the table Takisha crossed her fingers that the two gay couples didn't decide to – "Yeah! Get it in there good!" Shivering Takisha covered her ears and ran past all the bedrooms.

Getting into the kitchen she sighed in relief, only to almost scream. Deidara was pinned down on the table by Itachi who was just starting to take off his pants. Getting a small nose bleed Takisha quickly looked away. Her hands hiding her face Takisha yelled a muffled scream," PUT YOUR CLOTHES ON AND TAKE YOUR YAOI HORMONES INTO A BEDROOM!"

"Ugggh, why did you have to walk in on us NOW, un?!" Deidara groaned in agony. Only making Takisha want to puke more.

Pointing with her eyes closed she ordered," GET OUT NOW!!" There came a sound of shuffling feet, a slap and squeal (and giggle) then absolute silence. Peeking through her fingers Takisha sighed in relief at the empty kitchen…The empty clean kitchen.

'The only advantage to living with gay men is that they'll clean up any mess made in order to present diseases……Ew.' Going to the cupboard that she kept the cleaning supplies in Takisha got out the bottle of heavy duty multiple surfaces cleaner and sprayed down the defiled table. She would never eat at that table again until she cleaned off the top.

**Ka: "Uses tentacles to steal notebook away from Konan."**

**Ko:" Wha-Hey! I'm not done yet.**

**Ka: Fifteen minutes each woman. You've had seventeen. My turn now, and trust me when I say you won't like it. Which is a good thing.**

**H: LET ME SACRIFICE THE BITCH! "Struggling against Zetsu and Kisame."**

**Ko: Bring it religion boy! I've got extra hormone energy to blow off! "Runs at Hidan, who is released by Kisame and Zetsu."**

**Ki: My money is on the crazy lady.**

**Z(w): I don't know, Hidan is especially pissed right now.**

**Z(b): Crazy bitch is going to destroy that foolish moron.**

**Ki: "Tags gags out of girls' mouths."**

**T,K,J: Konan will win.**

**J: Please don't let Konan or Deidara or Sasori have the notebook again. I will do ANYTHING you want to prevent those images from ever going into my notebook again.**

**I: "Poofs up out of nowhere. Whispers something in Jenna's ear that makes her eye twitch."**

**J: "Lowers head in defeat." Fiiine. But…Is the outfit really necessary?**

**I: "Nods. Poofs away."**

**K: What'd he say?**

**J: I clean his room for a month in the stupid maid's outfit and he'll keep the four perverted and crazy people away from the notebook. If I want anyone else to be kept away from the notebook, he adds another week.**

**T: That actually sounds pretty fair considering the consequences of one of them reclaiming it.**

**K: In very disturbing way, yes.**

Kakuzu had enjoyed the cheap lunch of hot dogs wrapped in croissants. It'd tasted good and it didn't cost more than five dollars. Checking his yard sale bought watch (hat was actually worth 50 dollars, but was paid for with 10) and took note that the wenches should be working.

Going to wench number one's room he heard her signature mood music being played. That meant she was either pole dancing, or putting on her moves. Kakuzu favored wench number one for the fact that she would cook food for all of the Akatsuki, then hop back to work entertaining.

Moving onto wench number two he wasn't surprised to hear pained feline cries. Itachi had made his monthly payment last week for wench number two's services. Kakuzu had been in luck to find a wench that could withstand the torment delivered by S and M fetishes. The soft whimpering that came next meant Itachi was finished and cleaning up wench number two's injuries. That was a condition that Kakuzu had put into effect after wench number two almost died after three sessions and she hadn't been treated.

The fragrance of vanilla apple incense drew Kakuzu onwards to wench number three's room. Since she'd been shown to be the quietest Kakuzu had assigned her the simple task of geisha. She entertained two to three men at a time that simply wanted to be listened to. She'd get the odd beating once in a while from the odd violent drunk that would come in. After she'd been beaten to the point of unattractiveness Kakuzu had set Kisame up as her body guard. There hadn't been that many incidents since.

Continuing on to wench number four's room he was almost knocked over by said wench. Wench number four had barely any clothes on and his hair was entirely messed up. Panting he yelled," Kakuzu, you know I don't handle crazy women, un! She keeps trying to strangle me, un!"

A woman with frazzled red hair poked her head out of the room and smiled at Kakuzu," Hello Kakuzu-san. I hope business is going well."

"Yes it is. Deidara get your ass back in there and do what was paid for. No more complaining. Forgive any inconveniences Ms. Rizu. He will do as you wish and will also perform his specialty, free of charge." Kakuzu lowered his head in a small bow of respect. The woman with red hair was one of his most loyal customers. She was also very generous with her payments. For some unknown reason to Kakuzu she would go through all the wenches. She only talked to the females. When it came to Deidara she thoroughly enjoyed herself. The stories he heard from Deidara gave him nightmares sometimes.

Kakuzu watched with disturbed goose bumps on his skin as Ms. Rizu dragged a horrified Deidara back into the room. He'd have to endure a giant whine session later.

Massaging his temples he had to decide whether or not to approach wench number five. She'd been really testy over the last few days. He assumed it had to do with that female bleeding problem. Kakuzu sometimes wondered if Hidan wasn't secretly female with how pissy he got when it came to losing his blood.

His decision was made for him by wench number five herself. Konan came strutting down the hallway in a bright vibrant purple kimono covered with white dragons. Kakuzu could tell he was in for a bigger headache than he already had. Her eyes were cold and hard beneath her needed to be trimmed bangs. He stopped walking and waited for Konan to reach him. At one meter's distance Konan stopped, glared them hissed," I hate you. Do you have any idea how much I hate you right now?"

"No Konan, I don't know how much you hate me. And I don't care how much you hate me. Why aren't you in your room working?" Kakuzu groaned, his tentacles tensing in case they were needed to restrain Konan…For the tenth time that month.

Sticking out her chin Konan responded just as bitchy," I'm not in my room because the fat pig that calls himself the Lord of the Wind nation has fallen asleep AGAIN!! The frick'n tool came in totally drunk, tried to rape me, then fell asleep completely naked in the middle of the floor!! I refuse to touch his filthy, sweaty, zit covered body!!! So you either move him, or cancel all my other appointments."

Her anger vented Konan felt a smidge better, just a smidge. She stood aside to let the very unpleased Kakuzu pass and followed after him to her bedroom. Kakuzu took care of the filthy time waster the same way he did with every other drunk that passed out during a session. He wrapped them up in his tentacles and threw him out of the room with just enough force that he landed an inch short of the door.

Impact with the floor was harsh enough to wake up the Wind nation lord. Sitting up the fat lummox asked," Wh-what's going on? Why am I in a cave? And why am I cold?" Kakuzu looked at wench number five to silently tell her to finish her job.

An angry mark on her head went unnoticed as she plastered a smiling face on to tell the Lord," My lord, you fell asleep during our session and began sleep walking out of the room. You ran into the wall and woke up. Come with me back into the room and we can get your clothes back on."

The still intoxicated Lord believed every word Konan said. Smiling pervertedly he followed a very, very, VERY, pissed wench number five back into the room. Once the door closed Kakuzu allowed himself to sigh in relief.

Now that all the wenches had been accounted for Kakuzu could go back to his room and enjoy the splendor of his wealth. Technically all the money they were making goes towards the Akatsuki's grand plan. But being the treasurer, Kakuzu got to hold onto all the money. Which he did, in a giant safe hidden by a genjutsu in the back of his room.

"Kakuzu." Kakuzu's eye twitched at the voice of one of the last people he wanted to see. Turning around he found himself looking down at the pimp of the cave. Hidan was decked out in a fur coat, black fedora, and black business suit pants. His Jashin necklace was recently upgraded with diamonds around the rim.

Two women on each arm he grinned (showing a gold tooth) and asked," What's up bitch?"

"My temper. Leave me alone and tend to your cheap wenches. I'm sure they're pining for your immortal ass." Kakuzu wasn't exaggerating. Hidan ran a cheaper section of the business for those that couldn't afford the special wenches. Hidan was able to bring in three new whores every day, which was necessary with the number he sacrificed every day.

Hidan smirked at the thought saying," You're probably right. Best not to leave them hanging. Oh, and I've got a new girl could do all your expensive whore's jobs."

"I highly doubt it Hidan. So stop trying and get back to your station. You know those wenches steal money from time to time." The very thought of filthy tramps touching his precious money made Kakuzu's blood boil.

The glare Hidan was getting from Kakuzu was enough persuasion to leave. Before Kakuzu had convinced Leader to turn their hideout into a whore house Hidan would have put up a bigger fight. But because of all the 'release' he was getting from his women he was much more laid back. The sacrificing must have made him feel better too, he always seemed more light hearted when he came to supper covered in blood.

**Z: I believe it is our turn now Kakuzu.**

**Ka: "Checks the time." It was your turn ten minutes ago.**

**Z: _Yes, but we were enjoying your work too much to interrupt._**

**Ka: I see. "Hands notebook to Zetsu and leaves."**

**J: Zetsu, are you going to eat all of us?**

**Z: Yes.**

**J: Oh, okay. Go ahead then.**

**D: What the hell is that?!**

**K: What was what?**

**D: That, un! He tells you you're going to be eaten, and you don't care, un?**

**T: It's a hell of a lot better than what you did. This way we die, and stay dead. Unlike some other people that play with corpses. "Dirty look to Sasori."**

**D: Sooo, if I had just eaten –**

**J,K,T: DON'T EVEN!!! "Straining against ropes to kill Deidara."**

**D: "Dirty smirk."**

**Ko: HA! I win! "Heeled shoe on Hidan's dismembered head."**

**H: Fuckin' bitch cheated! It was a hand to hand fight! Using a paper plane doesn't count!**

**Ko: Never heard any such rules being made before we went at it.**

**H: "Long string of swear words."**

**Z: _Silence. I can't concentrate with your idiots going on. "Mouth watering."_**

**K: That can't be a very good thing. Even when it comes to us being eaten.**

The pigs in blankets were indeed tasty, but not even close to satisfying for Zetsu's insatiable hunger. His hunger for human flesh and human bone marrow. He'd watched with starved eyes as Takisha left them to her bedroom. _'She'll be vulnerable. She doesn't know how to defend herself. Itachi complains about their slow progress everyday. Do it. Eat her. She's the chef, she has to feed you!'_ Zetsu's darker side whispered this continuously, adding words to make Takisha seem like a fresh succulent roast.

Unable to stand it Zetsu sank himself beneath the floor to draw away suspicion from himself, and the bottle of honey garlic barbeque sauce in his hand.

He knew his maze of underground tunnels like the back of his hand, so getting to Takisha's room took less than a minute. He actually arrived in her room before she did. Playing it monster style Zetsu burrowed a hole up underneath Takisha's bed. Her blankets hung down over the sides enough that you couldn't see anything underneath with a passing glance.

A couple of seconds passed before Takisha arrived grumbling about Deidara being a pervert, and Hidan being a jack ass. As Zetsu expected she went straight to her bed and collapsed onto it. (They found out that Takisha took a nap after making lunch everyday because everything that happened before that always wore her out.)

Zetsu patiently waited another couple of minutes before Takisha fell into a deep sleep. Once her breathing slowed he went back underground and tunneled up at the end of Takisha's bed where her feet were. Already salivating Zetsu took the lid off the honey garlic sauce. Zetsu had also snuck out the basting brush usually used for meat. He started at the feet and worked his way up, covering any exposed skin in sauce. When he got to her left arm the smell of the sauce must have gotten through Takisha's dreams. She squirmed and mumbled," I hate honey garlic sauce…Could have used regular."

"Shh, don't worry, I'll use regular next time." Zetsu whispered soothingly, making Takisha smile and go back to complete sleep.

Zetsu quickly covered the other arm and decided that was enough. Putting the bottle and brush on the dresser he went to the door and locked it. Once of the things he hated most was being interrupted while he was eating. It also wouldn't be a very pretty sight that the other girls needed to see.

He took out a kunai he'd gotten Jenna to sharpen last night (she'd cut herself a few times in the process), and in a quiet voice said," Your culinary skills shall be missed." He then slashed her throat, giving her a quick pleasant death. No one can say Zetsu is entirely heartless.

**-20 Minutes Later-**

Zetsu quietly closed he door behind him as he checked for anyone in the hallways. For the moment he seemed to be in the clear. Walking casually he thought to himself,' _That wasn't so bad, now was it. No one will find any clues indicating you. _That is true. My hunger is satisfied, I see no problem with this. _Yes, and you know what? There are two more meals for us to have. Supper and breakfast. _We can get away with this. We can just make it appear as if they each had a different accident. _Excellent. Now we must be patient._' His silent conversation over Zetsu continued on to his room where he could rest and digest his meal in silence.

"Hey Zetsu-san, have you seen Takisha? She was supposed to help me do my toe nails." Jenna asked, running up to him before he could go into his room.

'Minus five life points.' "I haven't seen her. Go look else where." Zetsu grumbled, irritated that he'd been stalled from resting. Looking back over his shoulder he saw a slightly depressed Jenna.

Rolling his eyes at how soft he was Zetsu said a little more patiently," If you want a really good paint job for your toe nails I suggest asking Kakuzu."

"Kakuzu?" Jenna asked in confusion. Like most everyone else, the thought of Kakuzu doing toe nails would never cross anyone's mind in a million years.

"Just trust me, he'll gladly paint your toe nails. Don't be surprised if he gets…Disturbing in the process. And don't forget you have the graveyard shift tonight." Zetsu added a little glare to make sure Jenna remembered. Jenna gave a nod of complete understanding and ran off to find Kakuzu.

Sighing in relief Zetsu went into his room and curled up for a nap of happy digesting.

**- Else Where-**

Kenzie had enjoyed her few pigs in blankets, as well as the four she'd stolen from the guys. Those tiny hot dog bits could only fill so much stomach space.

Heading to her room to get the sketch book she'd recently received from Konan she was amused and shocked to see Jenna running for her life. Stepping aside she yelled," Why are you running?"

"KAKUZU! FOOT MOLESTER! NAIL POLISH!! HELP MEEEE!!!" Jenna screamed back running straight for the now retreating Kenzie. After hearing 'Kakuzu' and 'foot molester' she decided it was best not to find out what was going on.

Her retreat hastened when Kakuzu's voice bellowed down the hallway," Get back here girl! Your feet belong to me!!"

"NO THEY DON'T! THEY'RE ATTACHED TO MY LEGS!!" Jenna screamed back while flying past Kenzie.

Kenzie felt the floor shudder as Kakuzu barreled after Jenna. Kenzie made a quick choice and squished herself against the wall. She'd made the right decision as Kakuzu flew past her; if she hadn't moved Kakuzu would have run her over. She watched as Kakuzu caught up to Jenna, bound her legs together and dragged her back to his room. However, when Kakuzu came to where Kenzie stood he stopped and looked down at Kenzie's bare feet. Jenna noticed and whispered," You might want to start running."

"Too late." Kakuzu bound Kenzie around the ankles with another 10 to 20 tentacles. Pulling tight, he put Kenzie on her back next to Jenna.

Dragging them to his room he heard Jenna tell Kenzie," Can't wait to see what he does to your feet. Creep gave me a painful deep tissue massage. Can't complain about his paint job though."

"Then… Why did you run away?" Kenzie thought it was weird that Kakuzu knew how to give a deep tissue massage. But it wouldn't creep her out enough to make her run for her life.

Jenna's eyes narrowed into a disgusted glare that she directed to Kakuzu's back, her voice a low grumble she replied," He started drooling and talking mushy to it. He wanted to wash me feet." Kenzie immediately started to struggle. Doing toe nails is one thing, falling in love with her feet to the point of drooling is a whole other category. The category of feet fetish; not something she wanted to see or witness first hand.

"You can whatever you like wenches, but my attraction to feet is perfectly normal. Now keep your mouths shut. Hidan's bitching is bad enough." Kakuzu grumbled with a glare over his shoulder at his now glaring victims.

The next hour proceeded with massages, toe nail decorating, and reflexology. **(Ko: Reflexology: The procedure of pushing pressure point to bring out a reaction from certain parts of the body that are connected to the pressure points.)**

Laying on her back Jenna asked," Can I go now? My toe nails can't possibly be polished any further, and my foot muscles are so relaxed they went to sleep."

"You can go after I'm done with his foot. It needs a gloss over coating so the nail doesn't break. STOP MOVING YOUR TOES OR I'LL BREAK THEM!!" Kakuzu snarled at Kenzie, who couldn't hold still for longer than a minute even if her life depended on it.

Kenzie made a face implying what she thought of Kakuzu and his orders. Jenna groaned and looked at the alarm clock Kakuzu kept beside his ginormous bed. The clock read 3:30. That or 4:30, it was really hard to tell in the flickering candle light. Don't ask. Glaring back at Kakuzu she whined," Why do I have to wait for you to finish doing Kenzie's toe nails?"

"Because, she won't stay quiet otherwise. And I do not want to listen her bitch and whine since I get to listen to that from Hidan for three days starting first thing tomorrow morning!" Kakuzu, for once in his life, actually let himself rant. This surprised Kenzie and Jenna so much they didn't realize exactly what Kakuzu had just said.

It took a minute before his words properly sank in. "Wait, what?!"

"That's right. Starting tomorrow Hidan and I will be gone for three days. Same with everybody else. Except Tobi. He's staying behind to keep an eye on you three… I should give the other girl a pedicure as well while I still have the chance." Kakuzu screwed the lid to the clear gloss liquid while muttering the last part.

Kenzie took her foot away while he was distracted and encouraged his thought by saying," That is an excellent idea. Why don't Jenna and I go get her for you right now?"

Kakuzu gave a nod with a distant look in his eyes. He was already imagining the new pair of feet to clean and polish.

Uncaring for their freshly painted toes Jenna and Kenzie bolted out of the room and ran for Takisha's bedroom. The sooner he started working on her feet the sooner he'd forget to put pretty bows on their toes.

Busting into the room they found it completely empty. The bed was neatly made, there were no dirty clothes on the floor, and there was a faint but recognizable odor of honey garlic barbeque sauce. Looking around puzzled Jenna muttered," This is to clean to be Takisha's room. She at least leaves her dirty laundry in separated piles by the dresser."

"Uhh…I found a note. A note I don't believe." Kenzie announced after taking a closer look at Takisha's bed.

Jenna took the note from Kenzie and read it out loud,

"_Dear Whoever Found This,_

_In case you can't tell, I am no longer here. No, I didn't commit suicide. I just left the cave. Yes Jenna and Kenzie, it was possible. But I can't tell you how since I don't know who is reading this. And if you're wondering why I didn't bring you, or fill you in, it's because the escape only works for one person. So sorry. Hope you survive training and everything!_

_Love Takisha._

_P.S. Tell Tobi he is a very good boy._

Glaring at the note Jenna asked Kenzie," Do you believe one word of this letter? 'Cause I sure as hell don't."

Kenzie shrugged, believing the note didn't change the fact that Takisha was missing. For all she knew Takisha was actually dead and her meatless bones were hidden underground. Scratching her head Kenzie mumbled," Should we look around for her?"

"That would be the smartest thing to do. Though we should look without making it look like we're looking." Jenna stated gravely while crumpling up the letter. She was tempted to eat it too but she never liked the flavor of ink and paper, which made it even more tempting to ask Kenzie to eat it.

Kenzie took the paper from Jenna, guessing what she was thinking she shoved it down her bra. "There, nothing to worry about. Let's start discretely searching. If they ask what we're doing, we're looking for Takisha's imaginary pet rock."

"Uh, the excuse works. But please do something else with that letter." Jenna could only shake her head at Kenzie's idea of a decent hiding place in a cave with men. Men that would gladly use any and every excuse to put their hands down their shirts.

**-Four Hours Later-**

"I give up. She's gone." Kenzie collapsed into the nearest chair at the kitchen table. The past four hours had been wasted for nothing. All they accomplished was making all the guys believe they were nuts for thinking something like an imaginary pet rock existed. (They actually got Tobi looking for the pet rock too.)

Sitting in the spot across from Kenzie Jenna sighed," Can't wait until the others learn and demand we start cooking."

Deidara plopped down into the chair next to Kenzie. His uncovered eye squinted in suspicion he asked," Learn what and why would we want YOU two culinary failures to cook for us, un? I want truthful answers that don't involve imaginary pets, un."

Kenzie immediately touched her nose to signify that she refused to be the teller. Making a face Jenna grumbled," Damn the person who invented 'shot not.' It's like this Deidara. Takisha somehow found a way to make a run for it. So now she's miles away in who knows what country."

Deidara blinked once, twice," SHIT,UN!! LEADER'S GOING TO KILL US, UN!!" Pulling out his hair Deidara leapt from his chair and ran off to Zetsu's room.

Zetsu had just woken up from his nap filled with dreams of juicy eatings when Deidara kicked open his door. His hair was sticking up all over his head and his eye was the size of a dinner plate. Rubbing sleep gunk from his eyes Zetsu grumbled," What do you want Blondie? _Better be a good reason_."

"It's Target One! She managed to run away, un!! Go out and see if you can find any tracks, un. Leader will kill us all regardless of the other two still being here, un." Deidara's voice was high pitched from panic. Besides going bald prematurely, Leader's wrath was Deidara's worst nightmare.

Zetsu inwardly smiled. They must have found the false note he'd written. Holding onto the girls' old English work hadn't been a bad idea at all. To Deidara he said irritably," You, Hidan, and Tobi were suppose to have a constant watch on her. If she cannot be found, it will be on your heads, not mine." And when the time came for Leader to lash out at them he would truly enjoy the show. He will enjoy it even more when Itachi, Kisame and Kakuzu got lashed at for Kenzie's sudden disappearance and/or death. Jenna could not disappear though. She will have an unfortunate accident.

Deidara realized Zetsu was right. Paling another two shades he started biting his nails and ran from the room to start his desperate search. Zetsu chuckled to himself, life was great when you can get away with eating someone.

Going to the kitchen he found Konan pacing with a scowl on her face, Kenzie chewing on her nails, and Jenna was looking through the cupboards for supper. Taking a seat he asked Konan," I take it you heard about the latest development?"

Konan didn't answer, she only paced faster. "At least we won't entirely starve. There's enough leftovers to last us a few days, and scrambled eggs and bacon are easy to make for breakfast." Jenna announced to whoever was interested in knowing the food situation.

At the thought of food Zetsu's stomach growled. Glancing over at Kenzie he figured out a way to get her alone and get his meal in peace. Putting on an expression of thinking Zetsu said," What if she was caught by Kisame's pet shark and was eaten? Did anyone check around and in the lake?"

Kenzie, Jenna, and Konan shook their heads with surprised expressions. Zetsu stood from his seat and beckoned to Kenzie," You come with me. Leader wants me to show you where the perimeter of our area anyways."

"But…why? Jenna does guard duty. Not me." Kenzie whined/grumbled. At the moment she was situated in a very comfortable position. If she left it, it would take forever to find that comfort again.

Zetsu glared and made the "come hither" hand motion. Frowning Kenzie slowly got up and followed after Zetsu out to the lake. As they went Zetsu pointed out certain trees and rocks with nearly invisible markings on them. The trees indicated the boundaries and the rocks indicated alarm triggers. He didn't expect Kenzie to remember all this, not that she was going to use the information. He was only telling her these things to keep up the lie of Leader's orders.

Coming up to the lake Zetsu instructed," Walk around the edge of the lake and look for any clues that Takisha may have been here. I'll be checking the lake bottom. Don't be surprised if you see the stupid shark swimming in agitated circles. We never get along."

"That's surprising to hear seeing as you both eat your victims uncooked." Kenzie noted while keeping her eyes trained on the ground for any sign of Takisha's existence. She didn't get a response but heard Zetsu tunnel under ground. Kenzie's hope of seeing Zetsu shirtless plummeted. Her mouth had started to drool when Zetsu had said he was going to check the lake bottom. It's common knowledge that you can't go swimming in your heavy Akatsuki cloak.

Crying on the inside Kenzie toddled along the edge of the lake. Every once in a while she saw Shred's dorsal fin poke up out of the water. At the one point it came close enough that she could have poked it with her foot. She'd gotten as far as sticking her leg out before noticing Shred's eyes watching her from beneath the water's surface.

She was almost done walking the whole perimeter of the lake when she heard the water being splashed. Squinting to see through the advancing darkness of night she faintly saw Shreds thrashing around. Zetsu hadn't been kidding when he said Shreds and him didn't get along with each other.

Distracted by the shark Kenzie didn't see or hear Zetsu tunneling towards her. She got as much as a gasp of shock out before being dragged into the ground where Zetsu slit her throat with the same kunai he had used on Takisha earlier.

His meal lasted for close to an hour, and he savored every last bite. Resurfacing from his hole with the remains contained in a burlap sack Zetsu was met by Shreds with his mouth wide open. Scowling at the stupid shark he scoffed," What makes you think I'm going to give you these leftovers?" The shark replied by opening his mouth wider. Rolling his eyes Zetsu threw the burlap sack into the living garbage disposal's mouth.

The leftovers take care of and all the blood removed from his body (and hole) Zetsu decided it was time for him to get back and deliver the story.

**-10 Minutes Later-**

"She WHAT?!" Konan, Kisame, and Jenna yelled in disbelief.

"It's exactly as I said. She was searching around the lake, I was searching under. I advised her not to put any limbs in the water seeing as it was around the same time Takisha would throw Shreds the leftovers from supper. She must not have understood the gravity of my warning, for she did indeed put a limb in the lake. As I was searching I heard her scream and much splashing. Surfacing as quickly as possible I found no trace of her except the red waters. _Serves her right for whining earlier, the little twat._" Zetsu finished his explanation, gauged his audiences' expressions and found they all believed him. Confident he left with a bow of his head and went to his room.

Zetsu was almost to his room when he felt the stare of someone else. Looking over his shoulder he saw Itachi staring at him with no emotion showing. Keeping eye contact he asked," Is something the matter Uchiha?"

"Your actions and their consequences are of no concern to me. But keep in mind that there's always the chance of someone figuring you out. And when you kill the last one, do it quickly. Her lung capacity is enough to be heard for miles." Itachi kept eye contact with Zetsu for a moment longer to make sure he knew he was serious. Zetsu gave a nod then went to his room. It unnerved him greatly how Itachi knew what was going on at all times. At least he was leaving him be, which was quite surprising considering that Jenna was his personal toy.

Zetsu went into his room and got to work taking care of his plant friends, the task let his mind wander freely to think about his next meal. 'With her two friends gone her guard and paranoia are probably ten times stronger. _But there's always a weak point in a situation. _You're right. It's just a matter of finding it. _What do we know about her schedule? _She's got training with Sasori tomorrow. Itachi trains her in the morning. _You're missing a part. _Ah yes. She has guard duty, that's the weak point! We can make another accident happen easily. It will be purely believable as well. _She was given to us because she's the worst out of us all. No one would suspect murder if she fell to her death from a tree top. _Heeheehee. This should be the most satisfying meal of all.' Satisfied with this final plan Zetsu smiled and thought about the peace and quiet that would return to the cave.

**-Two Hours Later-**

The moon was full and still rising in the black sky when Zetsu knocked on Jenna's door. There came no reply except for a low groan. That being the usual noise he received Zetsu growled through the door," Time for duty. _Get your ass up._"

"Uuuugh! Alright, I'll be outside in five minutes." Jenna grumbled from the otherside, though her words sounded a bit more coherent than Zetsu was use to.

"Every minute is another life point. Keep that and your current score in mind." Zetsu reminded Jenna. He'd taught Jenna this lesson the first night she started guard duty and she'd taken a total of ten minutes to get outside. He didn't bother to stick around to know what she said in response. They'd gotten into the routine of him reminding and her bitching about him not needing to remind her.

Standing outside he kept an eye on his watch, Zetsu was for once in his life startled. Jenna came strutting out of the cave only two minutes after he got outside. Not only that, she looked wide eyed and bushy tailed. She even had brushed her hair and decent breathe. **(Ko: Zetsu has a very sensitive nose in order to catch run away delivery boys.)** Slightly suspicious he asked," Were you actually sleeping when I came to your room?"

"To be honest I was trying to get to sleep when you came to the door." Jenna replied with a yawn while stretching. Zetsu gave a grunt of indignation; he never enjoyed Jenna's attitude for the first few minutes she was awake. Silent he led the way to Jenna's post for that morning.

Jenna's post ended up being a massive tree standing taller than the cave itself. Craning her neck to see any branches Jenna asked," You're not making me climb that are you?" Her arms stretched out as far as possible didn't even come close to reaching the other side of the tree trunk. Climbing it would require mountain climbing gear.

Zetsu grabbed Jenna by the collar as he rolled his eyes. The first and only time Zetsu had made Jenna climb a tree ended with him doing all the watching for Jenna's shift. She'd started at 5 am and didn't even get close to the first tree branch by noon. Dragging her underground with him he could only think about the blissful freedom of working by himself again.

Resurfacing on a branch located in the middle he instructed her," I'll be back in an hour or less with your food. Do 20 push ups and chin-ups in the mean time. And watch for movement. _If I come back and find you sleeping that'll cost 20 life points._" The twitch of fear in Jenna's eye assured Zetsu he would return to find Jenna wide awake, sweaty, and starving.

Jenna waited until Zetsu slipped back inside the tree before letting loose a long line of swear words. Anger vented she took a deep breathe and looked over the edge. The drop was scary – her imagination's video of her falling to her death was scarier. Straightening up Jenna clapped her hands and whispered," O-kay! Stretched first, then ridiculous work out. GO!" Jenna then proceeded to stretch up to the sky and down to her toes.

**-Back in the Cave-**

Zetsu burrowed up from the ground into the kitchen. It didn't surprise him to find Itachi sitting at the table drinking tea. He continued to the fridge but engaged the conversation," She has an hour left to live if you wish to know."

"What makes you think I want to see her?" Itachi asked with his eyes focused on Zetsu's back.

Zetsu grabbed one of the best apples out of the many bruised, a bottle of juice, two slices of bread covered with butter, and to be nice, the last chocolate chip muffin Takisha made. **(Ko: Battles for Takisha's muffins are ****legendary****. Hidan has been more than beheaded for stealing them. H: Yeah, by you! Frick'n bitch. You steal them more than I do. Ko: "Simply decapitates Hidan with a piece of paper." H: YOU'RE A DEAD BITCH!!! Ko: "Calmly walks up to Hidan and kicks his head like a soccer ball.") **The many food items were placed in a classic wicker picnic basket. (Acquired from a little kunoichi wearing red he'd eaten many years ago.) Putting it on his arm he told Itachi," _Just thought you might want to have some fun with her one more time._ I do not intend to leave any leftovers."

Itachi didn't respond, causing Zetsu to finally look back over his shoulder. Itachi wasn't sitting at the table anymore. All his tea was gone too, meaning Itachi had asked his question then left right after.

**-In the Tree-**

"19…20! Thank the lords above I'm done. Phew! God I hurt now." Jenna was spread out on her back breathing heavy. Exercising was not her strong suit.

Being spread out as she was gave Jenna the advantage when Itachi landed on the tree. She just didn't know it was Itachi, " I thought you weren't coming back for another 30 minutes, not that I'm complaining." Jenna moved in order to stand back up, only to be forced back down by Itachi sitting on her stomach. Letting out her breathe in one gush she wheezed," Oof! Ugh. You're…too…heavy! Get…fat…ass…off!" Itachi lifted his feet, putting more pressure in his body to push onto Jenna.

Only when she got to the point of gasping did he ease up. Reaching a hand down he scared the shit out of Jenna by gently stroking her cheek," You…will always be my favorite toy. I actually enjoyed myself for a while."

"You are scaring me more in this minute, than you have the whole time I've known you." Jenna squeaked with huge petrified eyes. The way Itachi was talking made it seem like he was going to propose to her. 'If he smiles nicely, I will scream.' Thankfully Itachi did not smile, he kissed Jenna on the forehead then left. Which only succeeded in making Jenna even more paranoid. **(D: Gee, didn't know you were such a touchy feely guy, un. I: "Smacks Deidara upside the head. Glares at Zetsu." Z: Everyone knows this is fictional and almost over. **_**So don't worry about your reputation.**_**)**

Zetsu either lurked in the shadows to wait for a moment to come out, or he just popped up at a significant time. Whatever the reason, he managed to show up and glare down at Jenna to say," What did I say about sleeping?"

"I'm not sleeping! Itachi was just here and he was sitting on me!" Jenna explained hopping to her feet. She had to quickly adjust herself to prevent a bad fall. In order to so she spread out her arms to balance herself.

Zetsu made a noise to indicate he believed that, which just made Jenna confused, ' Zetsu must have asked Itachi to spy on me. Jerk.' Zetsu lifted the basket off his arm to show Jenna. Mouth watering she swiped it from him and examined the contents. Bowing she chirped happily," Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Zetsu said nothing. That way he wouldn't push Jenna off the tree branch before she finished eating. No matter how hungry he was, it was only fair that she got to eat her last meal.

Zetsu felt like he'd only been meditating for two minutes when he was brought out of it by the sound of sniffles. Cracking open an eye he found Jenna crying while staring at the chocolate chip muffin. Already knowing he was at his limits Zetsu didn't dare ask. But Jenna had noticed him looking at her. Trying not to wail she hiccupped," I-I m-miss Takisha and Kenzzziiee!! First Takisha disappears into thin air leaving a bogus note! 'Hiccup, sniffle.' Then Kenzie gets herself eaten by that stupid shark! I totally blame Kisame for that! STUPID FISH MAN!!! I HOPE SOMEONE EATS YOU SOME DAY!! AND I DON'T MEAN IN THE DIRTY WAY!!! **(Ki: "Blush" T: I know someone who wouldn't mind eating Kisame "pervy smirk at Kenzie." K: "Outraged face with giant blush. Attempts to bite Takisha's ear.")**

Unable to bear it any longer Zetsu rose from his spot, walked over to Jenna, grabbed her shirt collar and hucked her off the tree branch. As she fell to her death all Zetsu heard was," IT WAS YOOOOOUUUU!!!!" ' THUD, SQUISH, CRUNCH!' A very pleased smile came onto Zetsu's face, with a sigh of relief he sunk into the tree to go down and enjoy his fresh, slightly soggy, meal.

**Most of Akatsuki: "Clapping and whistling."**

**Ko: "Unamused face."**

**T, K, J: "Shrug shoulders."**

**Z: "Confused." Why was I not interrupted? That took over an hour to write. _And then some since I stopped to easy my wrist. _**

**D: Your writing is far too beautiful to interrupt, un.**

**H: Minus the odd bit here and there, it was fucking awesome.**

**I, Ka, Ki, S: "Nods."**

**Z: I humbly accept your praise. _Kisame's turn is next, yes?_**

**Ki: Yes it is, and it's about time too. I've been getting impatient.**

**D: "Raises eyebrow." Oh, eager to write your own little fantasy, un?**

**Ki: "Blushes." Not at all! "Shoves Deidara." Gimme the notebook. "Takes it from Zetsu and stomps away."**

**J: As tame as he is, I've still got a bad feeling about this.**

**T: If anyone should be worried, it should be Kenzie. "Snickers along with Deidara and Hidan."**

**K: What?! Why should I be worried?! TELL ME!!**

** -Rewind to Kakuzu Telling Kenzie and Jenna Getting Takisha…Takisha is Alive-**

Kenzie didn't bother knocking she just threw open the door and yelled," TAKISHA! DEIDARA IS TRYING TO COOK WITH YOU GOOD POTS!"

Takisha sat up, got out of bed, pushed Kenzie away then stormed off down the hall. Jenna and Kenzie wouldn't be worried if Takisha hadn't been asleep still. Running after her Jenna asked," Takisha? Do you know what you're doing?" Takisha's reply was a deep yawn.

Kenzie went up beside her and tapped her on the shoulder. Takisha stopped, her eyes opened and she smiled. A very creepy smile that made Kenzie and Jenna's skin crawl. Turning to face them Takisha asked," You need something guys? No? THEN DON'T STOP ME FROM SAVING MY STUFF!!!" Without warning Takisha grabbed Kenzie by the arm and threw her over her shoulder. That was when Jenna noticed Takisha's glowing purple neck.

The commotion Takisha was causing was enough to get Kisame's attention. Kisame stumbled out of his room covering a yawn. One eye open he grumbled," What the hell are you three doing now? I'm trying to sleep."

"Um, we wanted to get Takisha out of bed so Kakuzu could give her a pedicure, but we used the wrong method of getting her up. And I'm pretty sure she's unconsciously tapped into the curse mark. Um…Help?" Jenna explained while helping Kenzie get back onto her feet. There was a very clear hand imprint on Kenzie's arm from Takisha's grip.

Kisame looked at the mark left on Kenzie's arm, to Takisha's enraged face and sighed. Rubbing the bridge of his nose Kisame muttered," Girls and their cat fights are ridiculous."

"This isn't a cat fight. This is me being pissed off!" Takisha spun on her heel and lunged for Kisame. Kisame rolled his eyes, side stepped, then brought his fist down hard on Takisha's head.

Takisha fell to the ground like a ton of bricks. Slowly Jenna went to Takisha, crouching down at a safe distance she inspected her neck. The curse mark had receded back to its point of origin. Reassured Jenna lightly nudged Takisha whispering," Hey, you going to wake up like a psycho bitch again?"

Takisha let out a long pained groan, putting a hand on her head she moaned miserably," Oww, I feel like I'm waking up after being kidnapped."

"What is it with you three and complaining about something happened a long time ago?" Kisame grumbled as he headed back to his room.

"You mean that happened a MONTH AND A HALF AGO! That's not a long time, oh great teacher of mine-that-can-barely-keep-his-affection-for-his-pet-shark-to-himself." Kenzie wagged her finger at Kisame's back while ranting.

Kisame looked over his shoulder to glare sleepily at Kenzie. Waving her off he went back into his room.

Jenna helped Takisha to her feet…………………………………………………

**Ko: Uh, what's going on?**

**D: I don't know, un. "Goes over to sitting Kisame."**

**Ki: "Slumped forward with pen touching paper."**

**T: How can someone fall asleep while writing…Sitting up?!**

**S: Apparently he can.**

**D: "Thinks for a moment. Smacks the back of Kisame's head."**

**Ki: "Hand moves."**

**D: Hm? Hey, he wrote a few words when I hit him, un! "Big smile, starts smacking relentlessly."**

**Ko: "Punches Deidara." That's not going to do anything productive you idiot.**

**D: "Rubbing cheek." Not productive, un? Look a the page, un.**

**Ko: "Looks at the page, jaw drops." This…is very unsettling.**

**J, K, T: Unsettling?**

**I: "Looks over writing." It's his subconscious writing. He should continue. "Pokes Kisame, Kisame writes more."**

**D: Right, un. Tobi. Your new mission is to poke Kisame until he wakes up, un.**

**To: Yay! Tobi will be very successful at this mission! "Takes out a stick and starts poking Kisame."**

**J: I'm feeling even worse for you now. "Looks sympathetically at Kenzie."**

**K: Wh-why?**

**T: You'll see.**

**K: I really don't want to know now.**

** -Ignore All That Was Written-**

Kisame rose from his king sized bed with a yawn. His sleep had been made of bliss. The world was under his control and everyone treated him like their unquestionable god. Dawning his robe of deep blue silk he realized he was hungry. Smiling contently he went to his grand recliner with fish tanks on either side containing his favorite types of tropical fish. Taking a seat he pushed the tiny little button installed in the lid of the right tank's lid. For a moment there was a sound of static, but it cleared quickly enough allowing Takisha's voice to ask," Yes my lord, what will be your order?"

"I'm feeling like some soup and pumpernickel bread. And I want my favorite server thank you." Kisame's face flushed at the thought of what his favorite server could be wearing that day. For some reason she'd decided to surprise him by changing the outfit she wore every day. Yesterday had been an adorable gothic Lolita dress complimented by a parasol.

Takisha seemed amused when she responded," All excellent choices my Lord, your food shall be served in about 10 minutes. Would you like your other server to bring an appetizer before hand?"

"Ah yes, an excellent idea, thank you. I'll have some of your special salad please. And a glass of spring water as well." Kisame felt that a light meal at 2:30 in the afternoon would start his day nicely. Takisha reassured him that his food would be brought immediately and that it would be done all to his liking.

Reclining back in his seat Kisame pressed the little yellow button on the tank to his left. Instantly a small dinner table folded out from beneath the recliner. At the same moment it settled there came a knock at his massive double door. "You may enter."

The doors opened, giving entrance to Jenna (wearing the outfit of a medieval court jester) carrying a bowl filled with salad, and a wine glass filed with crystal clear water. A big cheery smile on her face she skipped forward and placed the bowl and water on the table. She would have said enjoy or some such thing, but all she could was bow with a smile since he'd ordered Kakuzu to cut out her tongue. **(J: "Squeaks in terror." K: And you were worried for me?) **

Once she left Kisame tucked into the salad happily, as always it tasted superb with it's unique vinegarette dressing. His mouth was full of salad when another knock came on the doors. Chewing at his leisure he maneuvered the food in his mouth so he could be heard clearly," You can come in, but it better be for a damn good reason!"

Deidara's head popped in around the door, looking meek and pathetic as usual he mumbled quietly," Un, I-I'm sorry to interrupt the beginning your meal, but I need your signature on these documents. Your war general, Itachi-san, needs your permission to start invading the next country."

"Since when does Itachi ever ask for permission to do anything?" Kisame shook his head at this meaningless interruption.

"Since you cut his hair and told him to stop doing whatever he wanted your lordship, un." Deidara slowly approached Kisame with the two papers and a pen. Handing them to Kisame he went down on his knees facing away, this allowed Kisame to use Deidara's back as a hard surface rather than his precious dinner table. With a flick of his wrist Kisame put down his ingenious signature, added a smidge of his chakra as well to authenticate it. Though shinobi only worked for him in his grand army he still felt the need to use his endless amounts of chakra here and there, for old time's sake. Deidara bowed with a smile and left to deliver the signed order to Itachi,

At the same time his secretary left his main course arrived, along with his favorite server. That day Kenzie had decided to wear the very maid's outfit she'd graciously accepted from Kisame when he became ruler of the Akatsuki, and half of the world. Instead of traditional black Kenzie's maid's outfit was made of navy blue matieral that started as a frilly corset, and broke off into a pair of mini shorts. Smiling cutely she pushed the trolley of food forward, when she was close enough she blushed and cooed happily," Are you ready for the main course, my Lord?"

"Most definitely. But that doesn't mean you get to leave yet. Stay here and wait on the bed for my next order." Kisame felt his ears burn just from saying that. It didn't mean he'd chicken out though, he'd taken the first step forward and would run the rest of the way.

Kenzie's eyes went from Kisame, to the bed, back to Kisame, then back to the bed. Her ears weren't the only things that turned bright red. She had to follow orders, and that was what she'd do. "As you wish my Lord." Practically running she quickly got out of Kisame's sight so he wouldn't see how red she was.

Sitting on the bed Kenzie allowed herself to let out a silent sigh of relief. Sure she let Takisha and Jenna (not really Jenna) talk her into using her sex appeal to get higher up on the food chain, but she actually liked Kisame. Just because he cut out Jenna's tongue, and makes Takisha slave away in the kitchen 24/7 with only three other people to make food for over a hundred people, doesn't mean they should use her to get back at him.

Her mind set she flopped back on the bed, she was pleasantly startled to find the bed was really, really comfortable. Curling into a ball she felt the past week's lack of sleep catch up with her. Without realizing what was happening Kenzie fell into a deep dreamless sleep.

Kisame finished his bread and soup with a loud burp of appreciation. Placing the dishes on the trolley he withdrew the dinner table and got to his feet. Straightening his back he spun around ready to tell Kenzie it was time for dessert. He was instantly deflated to find her curled up in a ball fast asleep. It hurt his ego some, but at the same time he couldn't be angry. She looked so…Cute.

Gently sitting on the bed next to her he couldn't resist lightly touching her. 'Her skin is so smooth. How is it even possible to keep skin like this after growing out of infanthood?' Kisame's eyes caught sight of Kenzie's exposed stomach next. The reaction of his hand on her stomach was instant; she squeaked, giggled and turned away with her arms hugging herself. What interested Kisame most was that she was still asleep. Leaning down to put his face near Kenzie's he whispered," Are you really asleep?" She didn't reply, only took in another deep breathe. Taking that for a no he felt now was better than never. Lowering his face further he went in for the kill…

**Ki: "Falls over after Tobi pokes him too hard. Wakes up." Huh? Wha?**

**Ko: Argh! So close too! "Fuming and stomping."**

**K: "Eye twitching with massive blush across face."**

**D: "Glare." I'm killing your shark tonight, un.**

**J: "Glare." RAAAAAAWR!**

**T: "Leaning away from Jenna." She's been doing that since it said her tongue got cut out. Someone please make her shut up!**

**H: Gladly. "Thumps Jenna on the head."**

**J: Ow!**

**P: Kisame's segment was the last one. And no, it is fair that Hidan didn't go. He got a chance to write twice already. Now you, the readers must decide whose segment was the best. You have two weeks to put in the vote. Three votes per person. Winner will get to choose breakfast for a week, and as an extra bonus they get to disclaim for the next three chapters.**

**Ka: How is that an extra bonus, that's just extra unpaid work.**

**H: You're missing the point. If you do the disclaimer, you can do whatever you want to these three for three updates.**

**Ka: I could care less about taking advantage of these three nuisances.**

**J,K,T: Thank god!**

**D: You're just no fun, un. VOTE FOR ME PLEASE, UN!**

**I: "Throws a random book at Deidara's head." You have as good a chance as Tobi.**

**D: For your information, I'm much more popular than you, un.**

**T: If you think about it, it's true. He has been asked to disclaim more than anyone else.**

**D: See, u? "Smug smile."**

**I: "Throws another random book."**

**D: Agh! Jack ass!! "Dodges next book." HA! "Gets hit by massive phone book."**

**T,K,J: "Crying in laughter."**

**Ko: Right, so get this read and place your vote…Before they kill each other. "Unties the girls."**

**J,K,T: FINALLY! "Stands up, fall flat on faces from sleeping legs." AUGH!!!**

**Most of Akatsuki: Lol.**


	16. Never Leave Tobi to Babysit

**Chapter Fourteen – Never Leave Tobi to Babysit.**

**J: "Cuddling notebook." You have have no idea now nice it is to have notebook control again!**

**T: All I know is that we're never going to let them write in it again. My nightmares are so intense, I wake up strangling my pillow.**

**K: "Mumbles something no one else could hear."**

**J: What'd you say?**

**K: N-nothing! I just said that some were nicer than others.**

**T: Not even Konan's was nice Kenzie.**

**K: "Shrugs."**

**J: Right, well now that I'm in control again we can continue the original story.**

**P: "Glare."**

**J: AFTER the winner is announced from the last chapter! "Leader gives Jenna envelope." And the winner is…a tie between Sasori and Deidara! Congrats gents!**

**D: Yes! I am the ultimate winner, un!**

**S: "Unamused expression." You can do all the disclaimers and I'll choose breakfast.**

**D: What?! C'mon Danna, you've barely done any disclaimers, un! Why can't I choose breakfast?**

**S: Because I don't like you.**

**D: "Sniffles and shuffles away in depression."**

**J: Seeing as he is too depressed, I will do the disclaimer for this chapter. I do not own any Akatsuki members, nor do I own any of my friends. AND I apologize for not updating in what must have felt like forever for you incredible reviewers ^^"**

* * *

**-The morning after everything didn't really happen-**

**4:00 in the morning**

Hidan had snuck into Takisha's room with her biggest pot and pan. Holding them above her head he whispered," If you don't wake up I get to bang these together. I'm being nice and giving you a warning now….No? Okay, you can't say I didn't warn you bitch." 'BANG!' 'CLANG!' 'BONG!'

Takisha flew up out of the bed, hit her head on the pot, then flopped back onto her bed. Her hands on her sore head she moaned," Hiiiidaaan! It's 4 in the frick'n morning! What the hell are you doing?!"

"What I'm doing is getting your lazy ass out of bed. Leader's orders." Hidan grabbed hold of her exposed ankle and ruthlessly dragged her on the floor out of her room.

On the way to the living room Takisha heard before seeing Jenna and Kenzie. Kenzie was absolutely drenched thanks to Kisame dumping a bucket of water on her. And Jenna, who'd been on guard duty was lightly scratched and sprinkled with tree leaves on her hair.

Kenzie: "You could have just tickled me, or pushed me out of the bed, or something other than a bucket of water Kisame!!"

Jenna: "Why? Words would have worked. Why a push? Yes, you caught me before falling to my death but those tree branches were anything but nice on my skin. Jerks." Takisha assumed it was Zetsu she was talking to since no swear words were used.

When she caught up to them she noticed a big difference between them and her. Kicking Hidan's back with her free foot she asked," How come they get to walk but I don't?"

"Because I enjoy this, plus I won't get to do anything to you for a whole day and night. So I'm doing what I can now." Hidan replied snidely, to emphasize his point of doing whatever he could he squeezed Takisha's ankle tighter.

Despite the pain she was enduring Takisha didn't complain. Her day just became the best day of her life, right after the day Lee asked her out…In a Super Man costume. It angered Hidan to see a smile on Takisha's face and she wouldn't moan, whine, or whimper no matter how hard he squeezed.

By the time they got to the living room Hidan was ready to throw Takisha in the lake to be eaten by Shreds. Instead he just threw her on the couch. Cussing he stomped over to the other Akatsuki members who waited for Jenna and Kenzie to sit next to her. Once they were settled Leader stepped forward with a rolled up piece of chart paper. He opened his mouth but Kenzie spoke up first," I'm getting some extreme first day here deja view. You're not changing the rules about them raping and everything are you?!"

"No, but you're close. You're up this early because I need to tell you the rules for our absence. For today and tonight until 9am tomorrow you will be on your own. Don't even bother making a plan of escape, Zetsu is placing an intense barrier jutsu around the perimeter. The furthest you can go is the lake, any further and those binding jutsus on your neck take effect instantly. As well Tobi will be staying behind to make sure you follow these rules. Am I clear?" Leader looked each girl in the eye, instilling a deep feeling of doom if they break the rules listed on the chart paper.

Tobi came forward and took the chart paper from Leader. Unrolling it the paper stretched all the way over to the girls' feet. Mouths gaping they watched all the Akatsuki members leave with a wave, wink, or glare sent in their direction. Once all of them were gone Jenna hesitantly asked," Tobi, what are the first five rules on that thing?"

Tobi cleared his throat and announced, more than read the rules," Leader-sama's paper says

You cannot order take out.

You cannot go into anyone's room.

Do not touch anyone else's stuff if it's left out.

Do not break anything.

Do not rearrange furniture.

Kenzie spoke up before the other two could," They're treating use like children they expect to have a party." Tobi snickered, he was there when Leader wrote up the rules. It was more than just trust problems he took into consideration. There was the fact that the girls would enjoy demolishing the place just to spite them for holding them hostage.

Takisha grumbled something about being the most mature but still untrusted. Getting to her feet she stomped off to the kitchen to make a big breakfast, it would make her feel better since all of them probably only got some tea and toast. Jenna bent over to grab the end of the list. After reading it a large smile spread across her face," I know what we're doing tonight."

Confused Kenzie took the end of the list that Jenna offered. Scanning it a similar smile came onto her own face. "You wanna bet it's not in his safe. Ooo Tobi! Do you know where you fellow organization members would keep things they consider treasured, but not worth keeping in the same place as money and whatever else Kakuzu keeps in his safe?"

"Hmmmm….OH! I know! I remember Deidara-sempai showing me the Akatsuki's Special Secret Spot. All Akatsuki members can keep three things there." Tobi's voice alone portrayed all the excitement he must have felt when Deidara took him to the A.S.S.S.

Making their eyes huge, cute, ad sparkly Jenna and Kenzie asked sweetly," Will Tobi show us where this special secret spot is? Pleeeaase?!"

At that moment Kenzie and Jenna could have sworn they heard an audible 'click' from behind Tobi's mask. Tobi raised his head in the proper manner so his only sharigan could be visible. He slowly bent down to put himself at closer eye level. His visible eye crinkled around the edges to show he was smiling as he told them," I will show you two and Takisha, on the condition that you do everything I tell you to tonight. Deal?"

"O-on second thought, we can do something else rebellious. Let's go see if Takisha needs any help. Ah ha ha ha." Nervously laughing Jenna and Kenzie back stepped cautiously from who they knew was now Madara.

Madara sped up their retreat by wagging his finger and scolding," Sorry sweeties, but you don't start a contract with the devil then walk away."

"Who said anything about walking? We're running!" They took one more step back, spun on their heels and made a beeline for the kitchen. They unfortunately forgot about Madara's time-space-no jutsu skills.

At the same second they got to the kitchen doorway Madara materialized and snagged them both around the waist. In desperation each girl grabbed a side of doorway and cried out," TAAAKISHAAA!! HELP!!"

Takisha was in a bit of a daze at that moment, so when she turned around to see what was going on the situation didn't set in immediately. She just stood there for a second, then her expression went from (-.-) to (D8) Raising a frying pan for a shield she asked," What did you do to get Madara out?!?! You know I can't do anything about him!"

"We don't exactly control his personality switch you know!" Kenzie managed to get this said before Madara pulled on them hard enough to break the stone on either side.

Tightening his hold so he restricted their breathing he asked Takisha in a very…disturbing voice," Would you like to join us on a trip to a special location. If you do you will have to pay the same price."

Takisha looked to Jenna and Kenzie on this matter, only to be concerned to them shaking their heads and struggling to breathe. "Uh…What's the price?"

"Sorry, but I don't feel like repeating that part. You have one minute to decide, if you can't before a minute is up then it's an automatic yes. Starting now." Madara was enjoying himself very much. The girls could tell just by the cheerful tone in his voice.

Since they couldn't breathe Kenzie and Jenna couldn't tell Takisha not to accept and that the price would give her even more psychological damage to add to what's already been done. All they could do was struggle and shake their heads violently.

Takisha understood the head shaking, but her need to satisfy her curiosity was driving her nuts. 'The price can't be that bad. All Madara has really done is take pervy pictures.' Rather uncertain Takisha answered," I'll go with you."

Madara dropped the two girls on the floor, allowing them to take in deep breathes to start bitching. Putting his hands together Madara joyously announced," Excellent! We'll be going after breakfast. And just to make sure everybody keeps their promise…" Madara's hands blurred together to make probably 20 or more hand signs the girls couldn't tell apart. Once he finished his index finger developed a deep red glow. Zipping around he placed a red spot on the girls' foreheads.

Looking up cross eyed Takisha asked puzzled," And this would be what now?"

"That is a promise mark. It's a small concentration of my chakra that allows me to locate you at all times for the next 24 hours. And if need be at the time to collect my payment, I can kill you. I will just need to snap my fingers, and the chakra on your forehead will begin to burrow through your cells. It will keep burning and burrowing until you die, or I snap my fingers again. Understood?" All three girls nodded with tears in their eyes. They could feel him smile behind his mask right before he zipped off to his room.

Once they heard the faint sound of the door close the girls let out the moan of agony they'd been holding in. Lying on her stomach face down Jenna grumbled," Why did you agree Takisha? Did you not see the violent head shaking?"

"I saw the violent head shaking, but I just couldn't resist." Takisha muttered grumpily rubbing her forehead. When Madara had placed it he'd made it really itchy.

Kenzie made the (-.-) face, shook her head and walked off to the kitchen saying," Curiosity may kill the cat until satisfaction brought it back. But when your curiosity gets satisfied you're just going to die from humiliation and mental torment right after."

"What?! Why?! What's the price Madara wants?!" Takisha scurried after Kenzie to hear the answer clearly, as well as make sure the bacon wasn't burning. Jenna heard them leave, but felt safe enough to stay where she was since there wasn't anyone to rape, molest, torment, step, sit, kick (etc,etc) her.

"WHAT?! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?!" Takisha's screech of dismay made Jenna sigh. 'I miss the days of her screeching because we saw someone checking her out but didn't tell her until after the guy left. It was more fun then.' The smell of bacon and eggs penetrated her thoughts then. Giving in she pulled herself off into the kitchen where Takisha was doing everything possible to not think about the payment.

**- 45 Minutes Later-**

"Ahhh. That was a very good breakfast Takisha. Now, shall we be going to the A.S.S.S?" Madara asked pleasantly leaning back in his seat.

Jenna glanced down at her last pancake, the biggest pancake out of the batch. It also had chocolate chips, it was pretty much the best pancake. Looking back at Madara she told him," I'm not leaving this pancake to go cold and uneaten. It deserves the same treatment as all the other pancakes."

"You mean mutilation and devourment?" Kenzie asked in the tone of 'that's good treatment?' Takisha shared the same thought, she only displayed it with her expression as she collected the dirty dishes and silver ware. **(T: Note – I am no longer on dish washing duty. I am free!)**

Madara made a noise of irritation but said nothing. He leaned forward on his elbows and watched Jenna intently. Feeling uncomfortable Jenna sighed and pushed the plate away from her. Glaring at Madara she grumbled," Never mind, I lost my appetite."

"Excellent, let's be on our way then." Madara, being a jerk, took the pancake off Jenna's plate and shoved it in his mouth. Holding in her rage Jenna followed after the other two.

Madara led the girls down the halls to Leader and Konan's bedroom, the girls were reluctant to enter, but not for the reason of getting in trouble. **(K: We don't need to see evidence of their love life thank you very much.) **Non the less they still went in, to their relief nothing was on the floor, sticking out from under their bed, or poking out from under their pillows. Madara continued onwards to the far right corner of the bedroom. Only there was nothing in the corner; not at all.

Confused Takisha asked," Is there something we're missing? Or are you about to pull some ninja tricks on us?"

Completely ignoring her Madara put his hands together as if to pray, bowing his head he began chanting an incantation that raised goose bumps on the girls' skin. Right before their eyes the corner before them vanished, it had never been a corner, it was a doorway disguised by a genjutsu. Finishing the chant Madara turned to the gawking girls, bowing as a gentleman he urged," Ladies first."

"Not when it's down a spooky stair case. Thanks anyway." Takisha made the 'shoo' motion with her hands, Madara shrugged and continued forward.

Jenna, Takisha, and Kenzie stepped forward but didn't advance past the threshold. Jenna clung to Kenzie's arm and whispered," I'll go down after you two."

"Nuh uh, you're not the only one afraid of basements thanks to Snake-That-Shall-Not-Be-Named." Takisha went behind Jenna and pushed her forward, too hard. She went flying down the stairs, she would have flown all the way down if Madara didn't catch her mid-flight.

Madara put Jenna down on the next step gently. Utterly confused Jenna scratched her head and said," Uh, thanks?"

"You owe me twice the price. Careful the rest of the way please." Madara gave a little wave and ventured further on into the darkness. Jenna was left speechless on the step, Takisha came down and hugged her in comfort/apology. Kenzie just gave her a pat on the head in sympathy.

The journey down the stairs took roughly 10 minutes, the girls were just about ready to go down on their butts at the same time the next door came into sight. Madara had gotten far enough ahead that he was walking through the door when they were still 10 steps away.

The door opened into a dimly lit chamber that was filled with various sized crates stacked on top of each other. Some of the stacks reached to the top of the ceiling, and that chamber was large enough that Kakuzu wouldn't be able to touch the ceiling even with his arms stretched up above his head! Madara stood in the middle of the chamber looking in each direction for one second at a time. Going up next to him Kenzie asked," So…do you know where it's stashed?"

"Not a clue, that's why I'm scanning the crates for Kakuzu's chakra signature. Knowing that over protective bastard he put some air tight jutsu of some kind on it. Ah ha! Found it. Third one at the top, good luck getting it. There's a paralyzing jutsu on the lid, so don't try opening it until I clear it." Madara pointed to the third tallest stack in the chamber.

Craning their necks a little bit they saw that the third crate at the top was the biggest crate in the stack. Glaring at the crate they thought in unison, 'Of course it would be at the top, and it's the biggest and probably heaviest crate out of the stack. Kakuzu you jerk, stop making stealing hard for us!' Crossing her arms Takisha asked the other two," Don't suppose one of you will climb up that unstable death trap?"

"Don't look at me, I can't even climb a tree. Zetsu just brings me to my perch." Jenna stepped away to put herself out of the choosing.

Kenzie shook her head at Takisha, she hadn't climbed anything taller than a freezer in years. Hanging her head in defeat Takisha shuffled over to Madara, avoiding eye contact she muttered," If me or Kenzie pays double will you get the crate down for us?"

"Make it both of you and it's a deal." Madara held out his hand to confirm the agreement. Takisha slowly grasped his hand and shook. In the instant after she let go Madara disappeared and reappeared with the crate on the floor next to his feet. They watched as Madara effortlessly broke the jutsu seal on the crate's lid and ripped it off. **(T: We were almost pegged in the head by flying nails. K: One went right by my ear! I could** **hear it!)**

Leaning in closer Takisha finally found out why she agreed to pay the price of momentary slavery, she was anything but impressed. Reaching in she pulled out the bottle of alcohol called rum. Holding it out to Jenna and Kenzie she asked," THIS is what we came all the way down here for? THIS is what I'm playing slave girl for? Some booze?!"

Kenzie took the precious bottle from Takisha and cradled it in her arms like a new born infant, having an expression of insult she informed Takisha, "Not just any bottle of booze. THIS is Kakuzu's bottle of booze!" That didn't change anything about Takisha's attitude. She just sighed and stomped off up the stairs.

Jenna examined the bottle in Kenzie's arms and pointed out a new fact," This bottle hasn't been opened yet. We must decide now. Drink it all and face the severe consequences, OR, drink some and deal with some minor consequences?"

"Pfft, need you ask? Of course we're drinking all of it. They wouldn't have put it on the list of what not to do unless they wanted us to drink it. Enough worrying about it, we won't touch it until tonight anyways." Her mind made up Kenzie proudly walked on to the stairs. Jenna followed right after with a shrug.

Madara watched the trio leave in silence. When Jenna was half way up the stairs he voiced the thought he'd been holding onto for the past 10 minutes, "These girls are subconsciously gluttons for punishment. I can't wait to see what happens tomorrow!" Chuckling in dark laughter her put everything back as it was.

**-Two Hours Later-**

"Kenzzziie! I'm bored!" Jenna whined coming into the living room to flop onto the couch next to Kenzie.

Kenzie made a face at Jenna, turned to Takisha sitting next to her reading an advanced cook book and whined," Takishaaa, I'm bored toooo. Entertain meee!" Takisha's response was a very dark annoyed glare. She was still upset about the slavery payment for booze. She didn't say anything, she just kept glaring and glaring until Kenzie finally looked away with a raspberry sound effect.

Slumping down further in her seat Jenna grumbled out loud," You know it's really sad to realize that we've been so busy with training and everything that we never had a moment to ourselves. And when we do get a break after so long, we don't know what to do with ourselves." Kenzie nodded her agreement. No matter how you looked at it, they had come to depend on the perverted idiots for time consumption. Takisha inwardly agreed, but she wouldn't let them know she slightly missed Deidara. **(T: Only because he amuses me!)**

"That is why I'm still here children." Madara, being all teleporty-master and everything, appeared before them with unopened paint cans, paint brushes, and floor clothes.

Eyes sparkling in delight Jenna leapt from her seat and hugged Madara all the while squealing," Thank you, thank you, thank you! Now I can get back at that asshole big time and not have to worry about the consequences till tomorrow! Yippee! Itachi's soon to be pink bedroom, here I come!" Grabbing a paint brush and what had to be the brightest shade of pink known to man, she zipped off to Itachi's unlocked bedroom.

There was a long pause of awkwardness until Kenzie said the obvious," They really should have put locks or something on their bedroom doors."

"Oh they did, I just disengaged them. What's the fun of having the place to yourself if you can't dismantle other people's rooms?" Madara laughed to himself about how intelligent his thinking process was.

Kenzie thought it over," You do have a point. Well, I'm bored enough to do something stupid and costly for me in the future. Might as well join in. You doing any redecoration Takisha?" Kenzie picked up two paint cans and two brushes, she already had a big picture in mind for Kisame's room.

Takisha waved off the offer and continued reading. Kenzie shrugged and went on her merry way. Once she was out of sight and hearing Madara sidled up next to Takisha. Putting his head beside hers he whispered," Why are you being such a stick in the mud? You can't still be upset about the reason you gave away your temporary freedom? C'mon, you know you want to put pretty unicorns all over Deidara's walls. Or a giant cross and portrait of Jesus in Hidan's room."

"The ideas are very tempting, but the last time I gave in to an urge led me to whatever will happen tonight. So noooo thank you." Takisha knew not to look at Madara and his lone sharigan, she was smart and kept her eyes focused on the book in front of her.

The page of instruction on how to make chocolate chip cake was suddenly replaced by a picture of her posing in the slutty playboy bunny outfit. Snatching the picture she ripped it up hissing," You kept those? How many copies did you make?!"

"Enough to cover every last inch of someone's bedroom walls. Probably even enough to cover half of a second bedroom too. There's also the ones I got made into poster size, they could be put on a ceiling. I'm sure Deidara would enjoy them much more than any silly paintings you do." Madara produced three more pictures between his fingers, each picture a different pose.

Crumpling the ripped up picture fragments in her fist she grumbled through her clenched teeth," Fine, I'll go paint Deidara as a drag queen, happy?"

"Very. Much better than my idea of unicorns. Scoot along then." Madara handed Takisha a paint brush and can of black paint for the outline. Stomping the whole way Takisha went off to Deidara's room.

For the next three hours or so Madara enjoyed seeing the girls go in and out of the living room covered in paint splotches. At about nine o'clock (still in the morning) he decided to check on their progress. He decided to work through them by enthusiasm, so he went to Deidara's room first. Poking his head in was enough to break him down into a massive fit of laughter. Even though Takisha had been black mailed into painting, she still went full force. From the top of the wall to the bottom was a large picture of Deidara in a skanky blue mini skirt, and blue jean vest. He was also pole dancing. The best part was that Deidara had make up and everything to look like a girl, but he blue jean vest was undone, revealing his boobless chest. At that moment Takisha was putting the finishing touches on the pole platform. Madara's sudden out break of laughter startled her enough to make her hand slip and put a massive pink streak through the bottom. Glaring she grumbled," You could have said hi or something first you know."

"Sorry, sorry! I was planning to, but your master piece caught me off guard. It's absolutely brilliant Takisha. Keep up the good work and I might burn all those pictures I took." Madara gave her a shot of enthusiasm by holding up one of the pictures and burning them in his hand.

An evil smirk came onto Takisha's face," With that kind of motivation, you ain't seen nothing yet." She turned to the wall that Deidara's bed was against and started plotting the possibilities.

Pleased Madara went on to Kisame's room. After last time he figured it would be better to knock first. Walking in after doing so he found himself standing in a painted aquarium. Kenzie had painted two walls entirely deep blue around the many little fish and coral plants sketched before hand. On the other two walls he found Kenzie painting a scene from 'Finding Nemo.' It was where Bruce the shark had started crying and saying, "I never knew my father!" 'Oh Kisame is going to enjoy this. Too bad his pent up affections for Kenzie will prevent him from totally punishing her.' Madara thought this before asking Kenzie, "And what inspired you to reproduce this bit of comical beauty?"

" A) I love this movie, and B) Kisame is half shark. What other inspiration do you need?" Kenzie mumbled this explanation to Madara without stopping her paint brush. She was totally immersed in the artist frame of mind.

Nodding in slight understanding Madara made his quiet leave, he could never really understand artists. Though Deidara was just too stupid to understand in general.

Rubbing his hands together in delight Madara scurried on to Itachi's room, " Now the best for last. Jenna! How are things…You are going to suffer something terrible tomorrow my dear child." Madara had entered Itachi's room only to be utterly blinded by bright pink walls, purple and green hearts, a banner painted on the wall that read,' It's okay to be gay!' and to top it all off the ceiling had a massive rainbow with a heart underneath that had 'I+S 4EVER'

Jenna was just climbing down the step ladder when Madara had entered. Smiling proudly she sighed in content," I thought the heart was a little over kill, but I'm glad I went with it anyways. Would you mind if I borrowed a camera and took a picture of it all? Just so I can remember what I was horribly disfigured for."

"I'm already ahead of you. I want copies to show Sasuke if I ever meet him again." Madara handed Jenna one of his best cameras. He'd expected one of the rooms to be decorated beautifully for immortalization. Jenna took five pictures of each wall, then gave the camera to Madara so he could take a picture of her proudly posing with a paint brush.

Tucking away the camera for later Madara asked," So, you going to decorate anyone else's room, or are you going to leave off at this master piece?"

"I was thinking the other rooms could be a group project for after lunch. If the other two don't want to, then I'll just find something else to do. Right now I'm heading outside, these paint fumes are starting to get to me." Leaving the room with Madara close behind Jenna could do nothing but smile.

**- 10 Minutes Later-**

Jenna was enjoying a cup of juice when Takisha and Kenzie came into the kitchen with huge eyes of disbelief. Lowering herself to Jenna's eye level Takisha asked her," Are you aware of what will happen tomorrow when Itachi gets back?"

"YOU. ARE. GOING. TO. DIE. YOU. FUCKING. IDIOT." Kenzie yelled each word right into Jenna's ear to make sure it reached her brain.

Jenna glared at Kenzie and yelled back," THAT. IS. WHY. I . AM. GOING. TO. HIDE. IN. THE. TRENCHES." That just made Takisha and Kenzie make the (D8) face.

Grabbing her by the shoulders Takisha asked," You can't be serious! Do you remember the last time we used the trenches?!"

"Yeah, but at least it can't be any worse than the punishment Itachi will hand me." That made sense, even to Kenzie and Takisha.

Madara had been present the whole time, but the girls seemed to have forgotten his existence because of the topic they were discussing. Clearing his throat to get their attention he asked," What are you talking about? There aren't any trenches in the area?"

The girls exchanged looks to telepathically decide on if it was safe. Takisha was the first to decide," If we tell you, you have to promise not to tell any of the other guys."

"I swear on my bloodline not to tell the other idiots." Madara actually went as far as producing a kunai and pricking his finger to draw blood. The drop of blood fell and landed on the floor with a little sizzle.

The girls decided it was safe after that. Jenna started," Okay, so a few weeks ago all three of us had a sleepover and decided to ditch morning practice with Itachi. All we needed was a good hiding place."

"So in the middle of the night we set out and explored every nook and cranny we could find. Eventually we got tired and wanted to call it a night. We were just about to head back to the room when I tripped and fell." Takisha continued.

"When she fell it looked like her head disappeared. On closer inspection we found a secret little tunnel covered by a genjutsu. We'd never heard anyone talk about it so we figured it couldn't be booby trapped. Being brave we ventured into the tunnel, to our relief it was big enough that we could comfortable crawl." Kenzie took a seat.

"We were probably half way through when we heard voices. It was Pein and Konan's voices. Afraid of being caught we didn't go any further."

"We really should have kept going, if we had we'd have spared our ears from the unnecessary torture. We learned more about their relationship than we needed to." In unison the three girls shivered from disgust.

Sitting in a thinking pose Madara concluded," So this trench, or tunnel, seems to have gone underneath or very close to their bedroom. Did you ever find out where the tunnel ended? Or who made it?"

The girls shook their hreads vigorously. Making a 'duh' expression Kenzie asked Madara," Would you go back in their to investigate after going through that kind of torture?"

"Good point. But what about today? You have all afternoon to go through it, and I know for sure that Pein and Konan won't be back until tomorrow afternoon." Madara was very curious about this tunnel, but he didn't want to be the one to explore it. For all he knew the tunnel was a trap set up by one of the other Akatsuki.

Takisha shook her head, Kenzie shook her head, and Jenna shook her head. In explanation Jenna told him," The second we got out of that horror we vowed only to go back in if we desperately need to. Example, Itachi is going to molest, rape, mutilate, and killing me tomorrow. Probably in that order too."

Madara shrugged," Alright, suit yourself. So what's the plan for right now?"

"Depends. What's the weather like outside right now?" Takisha asked leaning back in her chair.

"Pretty good. I was outside a few minutes ago." Jenna got up and went to the fridge to get more juice.

Takisha smiled and got up herself. Going to a cupboard on the bottom she pulled out a wicker basket and some resealable containers. (Jenna's eye twitched at the sight of the basket, though she didn't know why.) Kenzie's face lit up at the same time she got to her feet. She didn't tell anyone what she was doing, she just went off to her room looking very happy. Shrugging it off they went to work packing the picnic basket.

Roughly five minutes later Madara, Takisha, and Jenna were heading off to a nice sunny spot by the overly large pond. They were just coming into sight of it when something flew past them. It was Kenzie, decked out in her more revealing bathing suit. The one that made everyone's eyes hurt because the blue was so intense. She'd gone to her room to put it on without the fear of lecherous men attacking her, and she planned on enjoying it. Takisha and Jenna raised an eyebrow at each other, handed Madara the picnic things, and ran back to the cave to get their own swimsuits.

Madara, always being one step ahead, pat the spot underneath his cloak where he kept a little camera. He had a feeling much money would be coming his way in the near future.

Getting close, but not too close to the ponds edge Madara set down the blanket and picnic basket. Being a smart as he'd brought a lounge chair he'd stolen from the other dimension. Laying back in it with a sigh he thought to himself," I could get use to this babysitting thing."

Kenzie stood at the edge of the pond looking down into the pristine water, she would have loved to jump in the water at the that very moment, but she didn't trust it's guardian to leave her alone. Not without Takisha there anyways. She was so zoned into the waters surface she didn't notice Madara come up behind her. "What are you looking at?"

"AH!" 'SPLASH!' Kenzie was actually startled enough to lose her balance and fall into the pond. Madara snickered at how quick Kenzie leaped back out a second after she fell in. Breathing fast Kenzie glared up at Madara from her back," Was that scare intentional?"

"No, but it would have resulted the same way even if it was. And you didn't answer my question." Madara stared back at Kenzie with an unseen smile behind his mask.

"I wasn't staring at anything, I just didn't want to go in without Takisha. She's the one that feeds him, so he'll have no obligation in eating me with her around." Kenzie's reason sounded totally legit in her head, out loud it sounded kinda wimpy.

Madara looked out at the water, as if expecting Shreds to poke it's head out and nod to confirm what she just said. Instead he was greeted by his own reflection that was grossly distorted by sudden ripples. Looking to his left he saw Jenna jump in after Takisha. Kenzie walked over while asking them," You do remember there's a shark, right?"

"Of course, but he loves Takisha. Stay close to Takisha and you are guaranteed to be unharmed. But that's just a theory, so we're also staying close to the edge." Jenna explained this in her rainbow swimsuit.

Kenzie gave a slow nod of reluctant agreement, turning to Takisha, wearing her blue one piece with a diamond cut and purple bow, Takisha merely shrugged. She felt completely comfortable in the pond. "As long as all those water bombs from ages ago are gone, I have no problem swimming." Kenzie investigated the water for any sign of a shark, seeing no shadows, outlines, or little ripples she took a deep breathe and plunged into the freezing water. Thanks to it being super sunny it only took a few minutes to feel her limbs again. By that time the girls were playing with a ball Madara seemed to just happen to have with him. **(M: What they didn't know was that the ball is a distraction so I could take pictures. This is information they do not know about. Don't tell them or I will find you.)**

Exhausted and hungry the girls crawled out of the water to the food and towels. Madara had eaten his portion of lunch **(M: And then some from the others.) **so he just stayed absolutely motionless in his chair. Swallowing her last bite of sandwich Takisha grabbed a napkin and a pen (don't ask) and scribbled on it, '_Think Madara is actually asleep?_'

'_He's a frick'n super ninja, even if he was asleep we can't do anything to him.' _Jenna scribbled this response very quickly knowing perfectly well what Takisha was thinking. Takisha's head slumped forward in disappointment.

Kenzie observed the items spread out before them and was struck by brilliance, '_Even a super ninja can be pranked from a safe distance.' _Intrigued Takisha and Jenna couldn't peel their eyes away from the napkin and Kenzie's beautiful plan that was being spun out from her mind. Once her hand stopped they could only sit there and marvel at the master piece that their friend created. Kenzie had to flick them both on the nose to get them moving quietly.

Five minutes later they were set and ready to run. They had taken the bottle of mustard, climbed up a tree right above Madara and tied one end of a rope to a good strong branch, attached the other end of the rope to a tree all the way by the cave and got the strongest belts they could find from Kisame's room. **(T,J: "Pervy looks and snickers." K: 0.o Wh-what? He uses them to hold Samehada. T,J: Mmhmm. K: 0///o You're both horrible people!!) **After several intense games of rock, paper, scissors, Takisha was chosen to start the game of 'Hit, Run, and Pray to Any God Willing to Listen that Madara Doesn't Have a Short Temper.' The second the mustard landed on Madara she had to games of rock, paper, scissors, Takisha was chosen to start the game of 'Hit, Run, and Pray to Any God Willing to Listen that Madara Doesn't Have a Short Temper.' The second the mustard landed on Madara she had to use Kisame's belt and slide down the rope as fast as possible. Jenna and Kenzie booked it back to the cave as Takisha started to climb the tree.

They were just getting into the cave when they heard tree branches breaking, tensing up in case they had to make a run for it they watched Takisha come hurtling towards them. Takisha, traveling at ridiculous speeds, had no way to stop herself. Thus resulting in her flying off the last tree and miraculously landing right on top of Jenna and Kenzie. Groaning Jenna pulled herself out of the painfully dog pile," Let's try to aim for the ground and not your friends next time, okay?"

"There's not going to be a next time girls." Takisha, Kenzie and Jenna slowly looked up to meet Madara's mustard covered face, his mask was almost completely covered in yellow. The smell wasn't very nice either. Since they were lower, and Madara was higher they could not help but stare straight into his lone sharigan. He could have sent them all to the nightmare realm, but chose not to. Madara decided that they didn't do enough damage to deserve that yet. So he paralyzed them instead.

Since they could still talk he got to listen to their many complaints as he picked them up and put them in their rooms. Once they were placed in their rooms (in awkward poses) he got to work installing recording scrolls. These recording scrolls were modified so they didn't just record sound and visual, but they also worked as security cameras Madara could monitor from the comfort of the living room. **(Ma: Another thing the girls do not know; again you tell, I hunt.) **The scrolls activated when Madara closed and sealed the girls' bedroom doors behind him. Going to the living room he mumbled to himself," The paralysis should wear off in two more minutes. Which gives me enough time to clean my mask and make a snack."

**-In Takisha's Room-**

Madara had been rather unkind in positioning her body. The jerk had shoved her under her bed with her finger in her nose. She could just imagine Madara labeling the picture as 'Gold Digging in the Dark.' The second she regained muscle control she made a dash for the door, only to be lightly electrocuted at immediate contact with the door knob. Shaking her hand for circulation she yelled," MADARA!! WHAT'S THE DEAL?! ARE WE GROUNDED OR SOMETHING?!"

"Not grounded so much as having a time out. I'll let you out in an hour." Madara had managed to set up speaker like things as well, just for purpose of explaining their current situation.

If they'd been grounded and locked up for the rest of the day they would have the right to complain, since that wasn't the case they just shrugged and did whatever. Kenzie decided to take a nap, Takisha meditated and Jenna wrote a new journal entry. It interested Madara to see that she kept her old journal entries in her shoe, once she got to three per shoe she took the oldest and ripped it up into confetti. The confetti was then shoved into her pillow case. Madara made a note to leave for Itachi. Needless to say the hour passed without incident and Madara got bored.

At one hour (exactly) the girls were startled by their doors opening by themselves. Especially Kenzie who was leaning against her door at that precise moment," Whoa! Ow! Some warning is nice you know!"

"Shinobis don't use warnings, it makes things less interesting. Now come to the living room, we need to discuss the final touches of your artwork." Madara walked past Kenzie's limp body and went on to the living room. It wasn't until Jenna and Takisha came by that she sat halfway up and let them drag her.

Upon entering the living room they were greeted by Madara holding pictures and more paint brushes. Madara handed one picture to each girl, at the same time he handed it to them he instructed," You paint Kakuzu's room, you paint Hidan's room, and you paint Sasori's room. If you're not done by supper I activate my chakra points. You're excused of that though Takisha, since you're going to make supper."

"Gee, thanks." Takisha grabbed the paint brush Madara offered and went off to Kakuzu's room, she expected Madara to have put all the paint cans in the room already.

Making faces at Madara's back the other two (Kenzie slower than Jenna due to grogginess) went off to Hidan and Sasori's room. Though they actually looked forward to doing their paint jobs.

**-In Kakuzu's Room-**

"Oooh boy, working with him in the future is going to be a real pain after this." Takisha was looking at the picture when she made this comment. During the hour they had been grounded Madara had been hard at work designing the next bedroom art works. For Kakuzu's room there would be wads of cash flying out of safe with angel wings and a halo. On another wall she had to paint a cash register with flames coming out around it, for the price it was a number that would haunt Kakuzu's dreams for a week. 'Really thinking about it, this is the worst thing we can do in comparison to the shit they put us through.' That in mind Takisha's attitude totally changed towards the task.

**-In Sasori's Room-**

Jenna looked at the bare walls, she looked at the picture, she looked at the walls, and back at the picture. Sighing she picked up the paint brush and muttered," Dealing with Itachi is one thing, but Itachi and Sasori at the same time? I must have a death wish. I'm still going to enjoy this though." She then proceeded to paint Pinocchio on Sasori's wall, along with the lyrics from Pinocchio's song, 'No Strings On Me.'

**-In Hidan's Room-**

"Of course Madara makes me do the deadliest paint job. 'Cause we all know Kisame is just going to love what I've done to his room. So we have to make everything even, that way all three of us can run away from death. At least this won't take that much work." Kenzie was looking at a very simple design of painting the cross over top o Jashin's symbol, putting lots of clouds and rays of light. On the back of the picture it said she could do anything else that had to do with Jesus or God. She was tempted to add the lord's prayer, or the 10 commandments. A tablet with the commandments would be best. 'Now how fancy and in-your-face should I make the cross?'

**-In the Living Room-**

"The girls are painting so that gives me time to get more juice for tonight. We can't have much fun with just one bottle." Madara told this to himself to make it seem like he was busy **(T: When we can all clearly see that he is bored and just wants an excuse to keep himself from participating in the vandalizing.)**

**-Four Hours Later-**

"I'm done!" Jenna announced going into the kitchen to join Kenzie and Takisha, they had finished their work not to long before her. Plopping down next to Kenzie she let out one big sigh of relief. The picture didn't look like much painting, but it took a really long time to get Pinocchio's lederhosen just right.

Kenzie made a quick scan of the room, double scanned then whispered," You do what we discussed?"

"Mhm. I made sure it wasn't really, really noticeable too, that way it would make more sense to them." Jenna looked from Kenzie to Takisha to get confirmation that she'd done the right thing. Both friends nodded their heads. Putting Tobi's name on their last artworks would hopefully lead to equal punishment for him compared to what he was making them suffer later that night.

Lounging back Jenna asked," So what's for supper? I'm starved!"

"Tonight is pasta night, whether Madara likes it or not. It's been far too long since I've had spaghetti and meat balls. Of course no meat balls for you Kenzie." Takisha lifted her serving spoon to show them the spaghetti noodles.

Madara entered at that moment and inhaled deeply, taking the seat next to Jenna he exhaled," Ahh, that spaghetti sauce smells heavenly. I hope you're making a lot Takisha." This earned an exchange of confused expressions from the girls, but they didn't complain. Better they get along than cause hell over supper.

To the girls uncomfort Madara barely said a word throughout the meal, the tension actually built up enough that Takisha attempted to make small conversation. Which only made things more awkward once it was silent again. The silence, thankfully made the meal go by faster. The girls were totally caught off when Madara pushed back from the table and announced happily," I'm finished. Last one to finish their supper has to wear the skimpiest outfit." At first there was much choking from all three girls inhaling sharply with food in their mouths. After much water and clearing of throats the girls went at their food like they hadn't eaten in a week. Madara wasn't surprised with the end results. Kenzie first (the advantage of no meat balls), Takisha second (more noodles than sauce), and Jenna last.

Seeing that she was last Jenna groaned and slammed her head on the table, only to feel herself being pulled away from the back of her chair a moment later. Takisha and Kenzie watched as Jenna silently let herself be dragged away. It wasn't until she was out of sight that Takisha fully understood Madara's words," Kenzie, you do know that we have to change into humiliating outfits as well, right?" Takisha took it as a 'no' when Kenzie's face drained of all colour and very visible goose bumps rose on her skin.

Jenna must have been threatened, or was unwillingly aided with changing into what could be called a 'Play Boy Kitty' outfit. Cat ears, black sequined bikini top with very thin straps attaching the bottom black sequined bikini bottom and a cat's tail. She had been dragged out of the kitchen and changed in less than five minutes. The outfit didn't look that easy to put on either. Bright red in the face Jenna glared at her friends to comment. Knowing how embarrassed she must have felt they refrained from laughing for a total of 30 seconds. At 31 seconds they both broke into a gut busting fit with tears in their eyes. Desperately trying to breathe Takisha gasped," Sorry "snicker" sorry "snort" You don't look…"giggle." That bad…BWAHAHA!"

Jenna pointed at Takisha and informed Madara in an emotionless voice," Takisha goes next. She can be the teddy bear." The look of betrayal and horror spread across Takisha's face only made Jenna grin evilly ear to ear as Takisha was dragged out by Madara.

Having composed herself Kenzie asked," If Takisha is being turned into a teddy bear, the what does that leave me with?"

"That leaves you with the honour of being Princess Pinky." Madara informed Kenzie poofing up behind her. What Jenna had failed to mention (intentionally) was that Madara had produced shadow clones in order to help speed the undressing and dressing process. At the same time Madara grabbed Kenzie by the shirt and dragged her away Takisha came back into the kitchen wearing a fuzzy brown outfit resembling a one piece bathing suit. There was an oval cut out that allowed people to see her stomach (including the belly button) and the back had a slimmer oval on the back to resemble a different coloured patch. The outfit had the addition of a little tail and a headband with little fuzzy bear ears. The total cute appearance was made even cuter by the big pouty expression Takisha wore. Even though both girls were miserable they both knew that Kenzie was really getting it the worst.

The two Madara's came out in a manner that indicated something amusing/horrible. Standing on either side of the doorway both Madara's bowed and one of them announced," Now presenting Princess Pinky!" There must have been a third Madara that both girls never saw, otherwise Kenzie never would have come out in front of them. Poor Kenzie had a bright pink face that matched her neon pink feathers, and a mini skirt of the same bright material. To top it all off Kenzie had a little plastic silver tiara with more fluffy pink feathers attached to the base. The need to laugh out loud was so intense that tears were forming before Takisha or Jenna could even open their mouths. Why they finally did crumple into a laughing mess on the floor Kenzie did her best not to take the crown off and try to slash their throats with it. Instead she yelled," At least I'm not a play boy kitty or a bear, both of which can be killed easily!"

"D-don't worry! Hahaha! I'm about to die from lack of oxygen! Wahahaha!" Takisha wheezed out doing her best not to fall to the ground and get her head stomped on by Kenzie.

Feeling that the situation was getting close to a blood bath Madara clapped his hands to get their attention. Putting a hand on Takisha and Jenna's shoulders he announced," Now that you're all properly dressed I believe its time to get to the fun stuff! To the living room!"

Catching onto what Madara meant Kenzie more than eagerly flew off to the living room to claim a spot on the couch. **(K: When you are wearing a skirt, anywhere but the ground is the perfect place to sit! T: Especially skirts as short and showing as that one. K: "Glare of ultimate death." Don't. Remind. Me. T: Too late, already did. Oh look, I'm doing it again! "Big cheeky smile." K: ARGH! "Stomping towards Takisha with hands twitching to strangle Takisha". T: Teehee. "Scurries away.") **Takisha followed after with prayers of a game that didn't involve developing nightmares. Jenna didn't go into the living room until after she grabbed one of the last chocolate ice cream bars. The dairy treat in hand she ignored what she was wearing and joined the other two on the couch.

Madara stood before them contemplating how to go about getting the girls drunk. He could play a drinking game, or a regular game that forced the loser to drink a large amount. Kenzie, ever the lover of rum, couldn't wait for Madara to make up his mind. Hopping off the couch she snatched the bottle and a cup from the one little coffee table the Akatsuki kept in the living room. Sitting back down with a glass half filled she asked," Any chance we can play a game that isn't truth or dare, or somehow related to truth or dare?"

"Only if you can think of something else." Madara had been dead set to play truth or dare, it was his favorite game to use to get information on people was interested in. **(Ma: Especially since I have little recording jutsus set up in the corners of the room. Don't tell them.) **However, if they could give him an alternate game that can make them drunk, then he'd be all for it.

Kenzie didn't know many games that wouldn't cause a problem for them, all she could think of were the retarded games that Sakura and Ino would want to play. She was saved from hurting her brain from extensive thinking by Jenna suggesting," What about 10 fingers, or I guess, 10 shots?"

Takisha, Kenzie, and Madara stared at the play boy kitty in utter bewilderment. Takisha and Kenzie knew for a fact that Jenna had little to no social life outside of Port Lambton before the whole Akatsuki/ sensei invasion thing, so Jenna knowing about a decent party game was anything but expected. Shrugging Jenna explained," We played the school friendly version in drama class at the school that was invaded by ninjas." At the end of her explanation Jenna gave Madara a pointed glare, which he just waved off.

Madara plopped down on the floor and asked curiously," How does this game work?"

"It's simple. Everyone has a shot in front of them. One person says something they have never done, if the other people have actually done that activity, then they have to take a shot. You also have five fingers to keep track of how many. Once all five fingers are down twice you're out." Jenna was amused to see Madara absorb every little thing she told him. Kenzie and Takisha were already setting up what they'd need, which included hunting down some of the few shot glasses the Akatsuki owned.

Once they came back with it and a section of the kitchen table **(J: With so many people they needed to buy a set of two small tables. T: Instead of buying one large table. Because god forbid that it would cost 50 dollars more than the set of tables! K: Meh, it works out in our favor anyways. T,J: True.) **and four chairs they were ready. Well, Madara was ready to learn some things about them and then sell it to the highest bidder.

Seated and comfortable the four players raised their five fingers and began. **(J: Now, do to the fact that I do not know ****everything**** that my friends and Madara have done, I am going to make it seem like this game actually progressed. But all you get to see are a bunch of dots! Woot!...........................................................................................................................................................................................)**

**-20 Minutes Later-**

"Alright, I'm finished!" Kenzie surrendered after her 18th shot of rum. She wasn't drunk by any means, she just knew the game was a lost cause. Madara had named almost everything they had done, mean while it was almost impossible to say something he had done without singling him out ( a game rule put into effect to try and thrawt Madara's attempts at getting them out within 2 minutes, it only back fired on them.)

Madara laughed and chugged a good quarter of the remaining rum. Lounging back in his seat he asked," What's wrong girlies? I thought you three would be better drinking companions than this."

Crossing her arms with an angry pout and rosy cheeks Takisha growled," We're the best drinking companions you could ever have. Well, Kenzie and me are anyways." The three table occupants looked over at the couch behind them where Jenna layed with her face buried under three little pillows. After two shots she'd mumbled something about her brain feeling numb before toddling over to the couch and falling on her face.

'Now that they are a little more relaxed I should be able to manipulate my game.' This in mind Madara collected the rum and shot glasses and put them away. When he came back he told the girls," It's my turn to pick the game, and I say we play truth or dare. Who wants to go first?"

To their surprise Jenna unburied her head to volunteer," Since I can't possibly be anymore humiliated I don't see why I shouldn't get it done and over with. So I choose truth."

"Excellent. Then tell me Jenna, do you have any physical attraction to Itachi?" Madara knew that this information would be put to good use as soon as Itachi got it. Meaning he'd be willing to pay any price Madara put forward for immediate access.

Groaning from a sudden unpleasant stomach sensation Jenna grumbled," Are you kidding me? Any one of the guys that live here just have to take their shirt off and I'm physically attracted to them. To be honest though, Itachi looks too much like his emo brother for me to be 100 percent drawn. That's why Gaara is so frick'n awesome and sexy." Takisha and Kenzie were nearly beside themselves from laughing so hard. They found it hysterical that the only reason Jenna hadn't consented to Itachi raping her was because he looked like his emo brother.

Keeping this information in mind Madara moved onto Takisha," Truth or dare?"

"Pfft, dare. Like Jenna said, there's mo way we can possibly be more humiliated." Takisha was also feeling more brave than usual because of the five shots she'd had. 40 percent alcohol in rum tends to make most people feel like they can handle anything.

Madara, always one step ahead, already knew the perfect dare. Getting up he went into the kitchen and came back out with a bottle of chocolate syrup and a can of whip cream. Bringing them over to the apprehensive Takisha he whispered (so as not to be heard by the recorder)," Take these and fill Deidara's pillow cases with them. Then finish if off by putting a chocolate smiely face on the pillow cases."

Taking the can and bottle Takisha looked at both in confusion, Madara thought she was too drunk to fully understand what he'd said, and was about to explain again when she asked," Why would I put smiley faces on the pillow case? He'd just take the pillow cases off and find it filled with whip cream and chocolate syrup. Wouldn't it be better to put a giant chocolate smiley face on the base sheet and then have the comforter over top?"

He blinked, then blinked again. "That sounds like a brilliant idea. You may do that exactly." Takisha gave a salute and marched off with the weapons she was going to war with. Jenna and Kenzie were again in hysterics, only this time because of the mental imagery of Deidara going to bed and finding himself covered in chocolate syrup and whip cream.

After Takisha left Madara turned to Kenzie, beating him to the question answer thing she chirped," Dare."

"You guys are no fun. But here." Madara reached into his cloak and pulled out five boxes of blue jell-o mix. Kenzie took the five boxes and made the 'And?' face at Madara. Madara rolled his eyes at Kenzie and explained," Kisame has a water bed, the cork is at the top of the mattress. Need I say more?" Kenzie happily shook her head and scurried off to do her fun little task. Leaving Jenna and Madara in awkward silence.

Staring at her intently he felt the air get incredibly tense. He refused to be the first to speak, just because it would amuse him if Jenna yelled at him. Which she did," Are you going to truth or dare me again?!"

Smiling behind his mask he replied happily," Nope. Not until the other two get back. Oh, and my rules are, you can only truth thrice and dare twice." This sudden addition of rules made Jenna groan and roll off the coach. She really wasn't a drinking person.

"I'm done!" Takisha announced upon entering while cleaning the small bits of whip cream and chocolate off her hands. She had been a good girl and threw out the empty bottle and aerosol can. To her slight amusement/confusion Jenna got up from the floor in order to randomly hug her. Takisha gave Madara an accusing glare that was only returned by him shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head.

"Ok, I'm back. I didn't know if I had to mix or anything so I just dumped the powder in and flopped around a bit. Jenna's turn now, right?" Kenzie seemed a little too joyful for just dumping and flopping, but the others didn't question. Whatever Kenzie did would be on her head, not any of the others. **(K: Jenna, what did I do? J: This and that, nothing major. K: This and that doesn't answer my question. Tell me. J: "Sigh" You put water balloons in his pillow case. K:…I am a dead genius. J: Yup. T: "Applauding the dead genius.")**

"I will be a big girl and choose dare." Jenna mumbled through Takisha's shoulder. Thus causing Kenzie to actually notice that Jenna was clinging to Takisha, and making her give Madara a questioning look.

Again Madara shook his head and asked," Why am I the first one accused whenever one of you gets scared or angry?"

"Gee, I wonder why?" The three chorused in unison. Madara made a face behind his mask that resembled how irritated he was with his little friends.

Brushing off the accusation he turned to Jenna and said," Very good. I dare you to go and raid Deidara's wardrobe, choose a shirt and a pair of shorts to wear. Then cut pretty lightly designs in the rest. While she is off doing her little activity, you two must know that I will only let you use truth three times, and daring is only allowed twice. So you might want to think about your next choice. But no telling me until she comes back." Madara watched Takisha and Kenzie actually pause in what they were about to say/complain about rules other than what the game entailed.

When Jenna came back wearing Deidara's belly tank top and what could only be his boxer shorts she laughed and told them," I cut hearts in his shirts over the spots where his nipples are. All of his shirts! Mwahaha!" Jenna gladly accepted the pats of a job well done from Kenzie and Takisha who also joined in on the mental image of Deidara wearing heart cut shirts with his nipples showing. Madara smiled behind his mask, Tobi would have some really good ammunition to torment Deidara.

Plopping down next to Kenzie she looked at Takisha expectantly, biting her lip she thought hard for a moment then decided," I say truth. Though I have a very, very bad feeling."

"Hidan or Deidara? Who would you get in bed with?" Madara asked the question so blandly the girls were more than positive he had composed a list of dares and truths before hand. **(M: Which I did.)**

Takisha's face was bright red, but they could barely see it since she'd covered her face with her hands. Jenna and Kenzie leaned closer to her to hear the answer," Mmmandma."

Eyebrows raised Kenzie asked," What was that? I couldn't hear you."

Takisha glared through her fingers at her 'friends.' Jenna was waiting with her hands cupped around her ears and Kenzie had her expectant look still in place.

Taking her hands off for a split second she practically screamed," DEIDARA!!" Her answer given she slapped her hands back over her face and slammed her head on the table. She could hide, but not entirely escape from Jenna and Kenzie's hysterical laughter.

Doubled over with her arms hugging her cramping stomach Kenzie wheezed," Oh-oh my god! Deidara?! Deidara?! Why Deidara?!"

"Like I'm going to tell you. It's your turn for a question or dare. Choose truth, you have to be fair!" Takisha overcame her immense embarrassment long enough to bitch at Kenzie. She refused to endure embarrassment by herself for more than five minutes.

Waving a careless hand Kenzie told Madara," Just to make her majesty happy, I will choose truth. Question though. Why more truths allowed than dares?" This calmed Jenna and brought Takisha out of her shell of hands. All three gave Madara piercing eyes, if he tried to lie they couldn't tell any physical signs…or vocal signs, but staring intently might unhinge him to give them a half truth at least.

Cracking his knuckles, and leisurely leaning back in his seat to tell them their staring did nothing he replied tiredly," Thought it would make the game shorter, you girls will need all the sleep you can get for tomorrow. Now, Kenzie, your question. What attracted you to Kisame? His swordsmanship skills perhaps?" The implied innuendo did not go unnoticed. Kenzie's face flushed to the same intensity as Takisha's had not but a minute ago, and Takisha and Jenna were trying their best to retain their laughter so they could hear Kenzie's response.

Refusing to make eye contact with anyone for more than three second she glared so they knew she was not amused. Shuffling in her seat she grumbled," He has a really handsome face, and a good body, and a decidedly better and more fun personality…and yeah, I kind of like the way he fights. Happy now?"

This was not the explanation Madara was hoping for, and could only nod in serious acceptance. Jenna and Takisha approved this honest reply and chorused in unison," Awww." They then proceeded to nudge and elbow her in the sides, Kenzie continued to glare at them with a deeper blush.

"And now we come back to you Sugar Cube. Truth or your last dare?" Madara smirked behind his mask at the bitter expression Jenna made at him for the nickname. He'd been thinking of names for each of them for the past half hour. Jenna was easy enough, the other two would need more agonizing nicknames for him to be fully amused.

Covering a yawn Jenna told Madara slowly," I will do one more truth, then I'm crawling into the trench. I'm barely conscious at this very moment. So do not hesitate to take full advantage." 'She is definitely tired and drunk if she doesn't know what she's saying.' Takisha thought this at the same time she held her breathe to hear how Madara would use this to his advantage.

Madara couldn't have asked for a better opportunity to gather golden information, but he could only get one more question in. Thinking hard he decided a simple question would be best," If you weren't involved with the Kazekage Gaara, would you be romantically involved with Itachi, or someone else?" Even Jenna's fatigued mind had to admit that this was a good honest question. One she had not thought about herself for obvious reasons.

Settling herself in a more comfortable position on the couch Jenna closed her eyes and thought about it. Kenzie and Takisha went off to the kitchen to get snacks. Madara watched as Jenna's face twitched here and there to show what her thoughts were saying. The other two returned at the same time Jenna opened her eyes and announced," I have decided! I would not be romantically involved with Itachi, he is far too hormonally out of balance to depend on, AND, if I'm not mistaken. He killed his last girlfriend. He already abuses me enough, I do not want to know what level it would escalate to if we were in an actual relationship."

Kenzie and Takisha fully agreed with this logic, Madara just laughed at the imagery Jenna had just put in his mind. Jenna stuck out her tongue then turned to Takisha," Truth or dare?"

"Hey! I'm the one that does that!" Madara abruptly stopped laughing just to say this. Which the girls just ignored, he had been jerkish in laughing at Jenna's honest reply, and had lost the respect needed to be listened to for minor things.

Takisha got to her feet and stretched while replying," Dare. I'm hopped up on bad energy and need to vent it! So give me anything to do!" Takisha wasn't aware that she was really hopped up on alcohol, not "bad energy" as she'd named it.

Non the less Madara would not refuse her and told her," I dare you to go into Sasori's room and hook up the motion sensor stereo I just happen to have put in there already, and put in this CD. If you listen to it, you will understand why I want this done. Oh, and you make sure to crank the volume to max. Run along now." Madara pulled out the CD he'd spoken of and handed it to the disappointed Takisha. Dragging her feet to show how much this lame dare had depressed her she shuffled off to Sasori's room.

Utterly confused Jenna asked Madara," What exactly is on that CD?"

"You'll find out in about three minutes. Maybe a few more depending on how long it takes Takisha-chan to set up the stereo. While we wait, what are you going to do Kenzie-chan? Truth or dare?" Madara turned his lone eye to Kenzie who was already thinking about it.

Rocking back and forth on her heels Kenzie decided," I'll do my last dare."

"Excellent choice. Now what shall I make you do? Hm…No, already did that…Not enough work…Ahha! I know just what you can do. I wan t you to take Sasori's paints and put them in Hidan's or Deidara's shampoo bottles. The idiots have opaque bottles, and never stop to check the contents. On you go then." He made a 'shoo' motion and watched Kenzie skip off to happily comply with the instructions. At the same time Kenzie left Takisha came back into the living room with a much happier mood.

When she sat down she beamed at Madara," You are quite resourceful, I didn't even think it was possible for you to get our songs here."

Madara chuckled lightly and got to his feet, unbuttoning his cloak he explained," You can't get that music in this dimension. I just made sure to stalk up on anything I deemed useful, amusing, or important while I was there. That included music." Pulling his cloak open he revealed the inside to be covered in millions of pockets. Each pocket was bulging with some odd thing or other. One pocket contained CDs, another held head phones and mp3 players, the most astounding pocket was the one filled with digital cameras. Both girls didn't even think it was possible for a Polaroid camera to fit in a pocket already crammed with other smaller digital cameras.

Closing his treasure trove cloak Madara asked," Jenna, I believe you said you were going to crawl into the trench after your last truth?"

Caught off guard Jenna mumbled," I will…When Kenzie gets back…I want to ask her something before I go to bed, or nest, or cave…Whatever you want to call the dark little tunnel I need to crawl into." This earned an eyebrow raise from Takisha and an impatient, unbelieving finger tapping from Madara.

To make thing even more uncomfortable for her Kenzie came back around the corner from where Deidara's room was. Plopping back down she looked around and saw the difference in the party members. Facing Takisha she asked," What did I miss?"

"Jenna's lame excuse for quitting the game." Takisha poked Jenna in the ribs hard enough to make her squeak in pain.

Shuffling away to stay out of arm's reach Jenna informed them crossly," I do want to go to bed. I just needed to ask Kenzie if she would stuff my bed so it looked like I was sleeping in it. I've already got Sasori's pillow and blankets shoved into the trench."

"No, I will not stuff your bed. You can be hunted down properly. And I've also decided to call it a night. The weather is beautiful and the stars are out, so if you will excuse me I shall be sleeping out by the pond tonight." That said Kenzie got back up and went to her room to fetch the things she'd need to sleep outside. Including two of Zetsu's venus fly traps…the normal sized ones. **(K: But they don't like me! They'll try and bite me before they bother eating any bugs that land in their mouths. J: Would you rather wake up with one or two venus fly trap bites, or a thousand mosquito bites? Your call. K:…Venus traps aren't poisonous, right? J: No, they are not. K: I'll be in Zetsu's room finding the tiny ones if you need me.)**

Jenna gave both Madara and Takisha a ' and you thought I was lying' look. Getting to her feet she pat Takisha on the head and went off to her little hiding hole. If she was lucky she would be able to hide there for at least half the day. But her need for human contact and food would probably make it a small number of three hours after she heard the cave being torn apart.

Takisha watched them go and decided it would be best to follow suit. Collecting the dirty dishes she told Madara," I'm going to do all the dinner dishes then hit the hay. But would it be safe and okay for me to sleep under your bed? Assuming that there's any space to put blankets and a pillow under there." Takisha watched Madara's response to this question and was rather surprised when he shook his head.

The dishes in hand she asked before going into the kitchen," Any reason in particular why I'm not allowed to?" As she'd hoped Madara followed her into the kitchen with the kitchen chairs barely used.

Setting them up in their proper places he explained," There are two reasons actually. The first, I prefer to sleep without my mask. Need I say more? And the second, how would it look for Tobi if you came stumbling out of my bedroom bright and early in the morning? But you can sleep in the secret bedroom next door. You just have to make sure you leave it when no one is looking. And you didn't hear about it from me." Madara laughed at the expression of 'like they would believe me!' that Takisha gave him in response to that last condition.

Rinsing off the last dish she told Madara," I appreciate the offer, but it still sounds worse than sleeping under your bed. That being the case I will have to resort to my only other option and hide in Konan's room. You said they wouldn't be back until noon, and I'm certain I'll be woken up WAY before then." The dishes dried and put awy she gave Madara a little wave of 'good night' and went off to grab a blanket and pillow to use while sleeping under Konan's bed.

Madara shrugged and walked on to his own bedroom after turning off all the lights. After closing the door behind him he sighed out loud to himself," I'm going to be so bored tomorrow. All I'll get to do is watch as the girls endure all manners of beautiful torture. Well, I could always record everything and sell to the masses…That would be highly amusing…Very well, that is what I will do tomorrow. Now it is bed time."

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**J: Okay! Now I need you, the reviewers, to help me! After this chapter's game of truth or dare, I am at a loss for ideas for when I will do yet another truth or dare game, and no, I will not tell you WHEN I am doing another truth or dare. What I need you guys to do are think of dares and questions for us three girls, and the some for the guys as well (hint,hint.) So let your imaginations run wild!!**


	17. Consequences

**J: Hello all you lovely people who have been waiting...what...FOREVER for an update. For those of you that are reading this and thinking, 'ABOUT BLOODY TIME!' I apologize, and to those who are thinking, 'Oh, she's actually alive?' then...no comment :P...**

**K: Get on your knees.**

**T: And ask for forgiveness, right now. You are a very bad girl for making them wait after the last chapter you left them with!**

**J: -.-"...I'M VERY SORRY! AT LEAST I UPDATED UNLIKE OTHER PEOPLE I COULD NAME! "Directive glare towards Kenzie and Takisha."**

**K,T: xP**

**J: Anyways, I picked up a habit from my yugioh fanfic where I thank all you beautiful people who reviewed last chapter. Soooo "deep breathe"**

**THANKS TO: Demoness Drakon, Narutos sis and Itachis girl,.is., PrincessAnna-Uchiha Lover, Neko Hoshi, twilightvampirepunk (if you killed me there wouldn't be another update rofl!) GirXzimXfanatic, and Kakashi Forever! I LOVES YOU ALL!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Naruto characters, and the girls own themselves!**

**P.S. Thank you all for the ideas for which I asked, I promise some will be incorporated (though alot of you had the same idea xD) AND there is another chapter that is written but just needs to be typed, so be patient!  
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Chapter Fifteen – The Consequences**

Madara sat patiently on the couch in the living room, at any minute two of the other Akatsuki members were suppose to show up and if he was right it would be Deidara and Sasori. 'Poof!' "Right on time. How was your mission Deidara-sempai?"

"Not now, un. I'm going to bed, I'm completely exhausted, un." Deidara ignored the fact that Tobi had known when they would get back, even thought all Akatsuki members were informed of their objectives separately from the others.

Sasori a living puppet that didn't need sleep, decided to go to his room to check on all his creations and make sure they had not been tampered with. Tobi/Madara watched eagerly until they left his eye sight, then he listened very quietly. The screaming came first, "WHAT THE HELL, UN?" The beautiful composition of 'I've Got No Strings' sung by Disney's Pinocchio was abruptly cut off by the sound of what can only be called, 'Sasori's Rage.'

Both members came storming back only two seconds after their reactions and demanded at the same time," Where are they?"

Putting his hands behind his head Tobi told them happily," Tobi can't tell. They made me pinky promise and Tobi never breaks a pinky promise. Oh! And they told me to tell you and all the other Akatsuki members that you should be grateful they went to so much trouble as to brighten your lives." _'Can I make things any worse for them? Not yet I can't…'_ "What did they do?" _'But then again, I don't necessarily have to be the one that makes things worse.' _Kakuzu and Hidan had just returned via cave entrance. Their cloaks were tattered and splattered in blood. Hidan had various cuts and scratches on his face and chest.

Arms crossed Deidara told him bitterly," Go to your room and find out for yourself, un. I'm sure the artwork is just as…unique as what's in my room, un." Deidara, without showing it, was actually hoping that Hidan and Kakuzu's room was even prettier than his. He didn't even know if Sasori's room was decorated or not, but that didn't seem to be his current pet peeve.

Hidan and Kakuzu exchanged a look then quickly walked off to their rooms. Tobi was joined by Deidara and Sasori in waiting for their reactions. Deidara couldn't help but smirk when Hidan yelled," SOMEONE IS GOING TO GET THEIR ASS SACRIFICED!" Kakuzu's reactions went unheard, but his tentacles were out and thrashing around his arms when he came back.

Fists clenched Kakuzu and Hidan mimicked the other two in demanding," Where are they?"

Before Tobi could repeat himself Kisame and Itachi staggered into the living room. Kisame seemed a little frazzled with his hair sticking out in funny directions. Itachi looked exactly as he did when he left the day before. Upon seeing the other four angered Akatsuki members Kisame groaned and asked," What did they do now?"

"Check your bedrooms." The four Akatsuki members replied in a fierce growl. Kisame and Itachi didn't wait and quickly went off.

After the first two times Tobi had mastered the count down and showed his fingers to the others. At the same moment his last finger went down they heard something smash into a million pieces. Hidan tapped Deidara on the shoulder and mumbled," Bet you 10 bucks that was Kisame."

"I say 20 on Itachi's dresser." Sasori interjected before Deidara could supply a response. He didn't supply one thought because Sasori would know his wood. **(T,K,J: Lol! S: "Death glare.")**

Kisame came back by himself looking even more disheveled. His eyebrows knit together he grumbled," If you're wondering where they are, then you'll see soon enough. Itachi is going on a rampage tossing all the beds looking for them." This new development was just what Tobi/Madara needed to hear to send him into a laughing conniption.

Doubled over wheezing he explained," He might find one of them that way. Does he have his sharigan activated?"

"If he has it on any stronger even the whites of his eyes would be red. Jenna did not hold anything back, have you guys seen Itachi's room?" Kisame jerked his thumb back in the direction he'd come from. Very intrigued the other four men scurried over to Itachi's room. Their eyes practically bled from the sheer brightness of the pink walls. Shielding his eyes Deidara noticed the broken furniture on the floor, pointing to it he told Hidan," You owe Sasori 20, un. That's Itachi's dresser. I recognize the slash marks from him testing his shuriken in that piece right there." Glaring at the wood on the floor Hidan grumbled something about puppets only knowing so much about wood because they don't have any of their own. **(J,K,T: ROFL! S: "Casts chakra strings and makes them walk towards a wood chipper." J,K,T: WE'RE SORRY! PUT HIDAN THROUGH THE WOOD CHIPPER! S: "Considers it." Who gave Hidan the idea for his thinking? J,K,T: …Uhhh… S: "Making them walk again." J: IT WAS DEIDARA! S:"Releases chakra strings. Stalks off to find Deidara." T: I could have sworn it was YOU Jenna. J: Yea, but lying is part of being a good ninja. And so is hiding in the shadows, which is what I'm doing now. "Runs off to hide." D: What? I didn't even know that kind of joke, un! Jenna is the master pervert, un. Blame her. K: I give her three minutes. T: Two and a half. K: You're on. "Both wait watching a clock that magically appeared. They hear Jenna scream at 2 minutes 45 seconds." T,K: Dammit!)**

"I know one thing for sure, Itachi will not hold back with her after this. _And I can't wait to see it._" The five Akatsuki members jumped when Zetsu rose up from the ground right in front of them. There was a disturbing smile of pleasure across his face, thus creeping the others out enough to make them take a step back.

Going to the couch Hidan took a seat away from Tobi and made himself comfortable. To the others that were giving him a perplexed stare he told them," Nothing's going to happen until at least one of them is found. With Itachi on the rampage it shouldn't take long. I don't know about the rest of you but I'm not doing anything more after getting my mission done. Now don't bug me unless you find the wench that painted my room." Hidan then closed his eyes and fell asleep.

Shrugging at their fellow group member's logic the others set out to help Itachi, as well as clean up after Itachi. They couldn't hear any crashing of furniture, meaning he'd gone from flipping beds to checking every little nook and cranny of the cave. Sighing Kisame trudged off to find Itachi and remind him that the girls couldn't be killed no matter how much he wanted to.

**-In the trenches-**

Jenna had woken up slightly from Deidara's outraged screaming, she fully woke up when she heard Hidan's yelling. Crawling forward a little bit more to make sure none of her feet stuck out she did her best to keep breathing soft and even. The last thing she needed was to get caught because Itachi heard her hyperventilating. She was tempted to crawl the rest of the way out of the trench but thought better of it when she concluded that any of the other Akatsuki members could find her.

Outside the trench opening in the hall Itachi approached Konan's bedroom door absolutely ready to rip the door off its hinges. He was reaching for the handle when Kisame found him," Hey Itachi. I wouldn't do that; remember what she did to Hidan when he broke it?" Itachi pulled his hand back and spun on Kisame to glare at him sharigan on and blazing bright with fury.

His hands up in surrender Kisame quickly told him," Cool it, I'm just looking out for your well fare. Which includes reminding you that you can't-" Kisame abruptly stopped when Itachi raised a finger for silence and walked past him to a random part of the wall. He watched in confusion as his long time partner crouched down and stared intently at one particular part of the wall.

He was startled when Itachi put his hand through the wall and grabbed hold of something that let out an audible squeak. With a quick yank Itachi pulled out a very scared, and scantily dressed Jenna. Her hands over her eyes she whimpered," I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'll paint it over with black or red or white! Whatever colour you want!"

"No pleading, painting…or outfits will save you from me this time." Itachi, slightly baffled but mostly unfazed by Jenna's outfit felt no remorse in squeezing her ankle tighter and making her whimper again from pain.

Even in pain Jenna had been trying to think about what Itachi was talking about. Looking down, or rather up at herself she saw she was wearing the horrid play boy kitty outfit. **(M: I decided she had a better chance of surviving Itachi's wrath in that outfit rather than Deidara's clothing.) **Bright red from both embarrassment and the blood rushing to her head she asked," W-would you let me live if I was your slave for a week?" Jenna knew that her chances were slim for survival the very moment she put the pink paint covered brush on the wall. As she'd been painting she'd devised multiple means of escaping death by negotiating.

Itachi took out a kunai and pressed it against Jenna's throat," Three months, you sleep in my room wearing whatever I want you to wear 24/7."

"A month and a half, I sleep in your room and wear nothing but the kitty maid outfit, AND wait on you hand and foot." Jenna really wanted to make eye contact to show how serious she was, but she didn't want to risk being hypnotized into being a slave for the rest of her life.

Pressing the kunai a little harder he told her with finality," A month and a half, you sleep in my room, servitude, maid and that outfit. You will also do all of my chores and all your training with me. Give me your hand." No arguments made she held out her hand and winced when she felt the kunai slice open her palm, Itachi did the same to his hand then grabbed hers. She felt a searing energy race up her arm and to her heart before Itachi let of both her hand and ankle, letting her fall to the ground.

Looking at her palm she found a deep slice that was healing into a black scar. Keeping her eyes on her hand she asked nervously," What did you just do?"

"He finalized the deal with a chakra seal. By transferring his chakra through his blood he can now kill you whenever he wants, though I'm assuming he's only going to use it to make sure you do whatever he says." Kisame explained this as Itachi had left to find the kitty maid outfit and black paint.

Blowing her bangs out of her face Jenna asked," Is anyone else looking for me?"

"Depends on what else you contributed, and if you tell them and myself where the other two are?" Kisame stood at his full height with his arms crossed in order to remind Jenna he was just as frightening as Itachi.

Jenna felt no fear from who she considered to be one of the nicer Akatsuki members. Meeting his eyes straight on she told him in a much more relaxed tone," Nice try, but I don't go that far with betrayal. You want to beat them senseless, find them yourself. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to change into more…decent clothing so I can meet the rest of my punishment in comfort." Giving him a little wave Jenna scurried off to her destroyed bedroom (the first place Itachi had gone berserker.) Kisame huffed and left to search for Kenzie. The art work done in his room and Hidan's was too detailed and intricate to be anyone else's. What he didn't know was that Takisha had been in the room he'd been standing in front of.

**-Under the bed-**

Takisha had woken up on high alert after the first wave of furious screaming. She'd also heard Kisame and Itachi right outside the doorway only a minute ago. Her heart had frozen the minute she heard Kisame remind Itachi about the door. She felt of kind bad when it came back to life when Itachi had found Jenna to distract him from the door. But all three of them had agreed that anything one of them did was to be that person's responsibility alone.

Once she heard the sound of retreating foot steps she let out a sigh of relief, but not one that was full hearted. Just because they had left the door didn't mean that she was entirely in the clear. For all she knew one of the other Akatsuki guys had simply 'POOFED' into the room while the other two distracted her. She constantly shifted her gaze right to left looking for feet or clothing. 'If I see a foot then I'm in trouble, if I see a piece of moving clothing, there might be a chance. What was that?' Amidst her train of thought she faintly heard something resembling the crumbling of rock. Shifting to look to her right she found herself staring at Zetsu's heard as it slowly rose from the ground a centimeter away from her nose. Biting back a scream she hissed," You have no reason to come after me! We didn't paint your room or anything! Now shoo!...Please?"

Even though his mouth was still underground she could clearly hear him chuckle, his laughter was felt through the ground and on her skin. Eyes widening she warned," Don't you EEEEEEK!" Before she could scurry out from under the bed she felt cold, thorny vines wrap around her waist and ankles. With one big tug she was dragged underground and brought back up in front of a now very awake Hidan.

Paler than Jenna Takisha stuttered," I-I didn't decorate your room! I d-decorated Deidara and Kakuzu's room!" In her desperate attempt to stay unsacrificed Takisha didn't notice Kakuzu come in the room from behind, followed by Sasori and Deidara.

She was made aware of their presence when Zetsu dropped her on the ground and she was wrapped up in a cocoon of Kakuzu's tentacles. Allowed enough slack to breathe she was hung upside down on eye level with her death sentencers. A smile of pure malevolence, something quite uncommon on Deidara, spread across his face. Getting nose to nose with Takisha he told her in a very soft lethal voice," Well my little artist, I believe we need to have a nice little…discussion. You, Kakuzu and my self, un. Seeing as neither mine or Kakuzu's rooms are in any condition for conversation we'll have our meeting in your bedroom, un. Don't worry, we'll be gentle, un." Takisha opened her mouth to scream for help from Jenna, only to have more tentacles gag her. Crying from her fear she could only fruitlessly struggle as they carried her away to her bedroom.

Jenna watched from a shadowed doorway as Takisha was taken away by Deidara and Kakuzu. Petrified just watching this she decided it would be best to find Kenzie. She took one step backwards and froze.

Sasori had come into the room with Deidara and Kakuzu, but he had not left with them. Thanks to Madara double checking the rooms before supper he had found and changed the signatures to those of the rightful painters. Sasori had not missed this minor detail, and thus knew whom to give proper "thanks" to for decorating his bedroom. Sasori had been watching Jenna from the corner of his eye the very minute she'd arrived in his line of sights. When she took a step back he turned his full attention on her, making clear unblocked eye contact with a smile. She'd frozen from fear and the chakra strings that held her in place. Strutting up to her slowly he told her with no emotion," I found your artistic vision to be rather unsettling to my tastes. Why don't we go to my room so I can show you a visual I wouldn't mind?"

As they walked down the hallway Kisame passed and them and informed Sasori," No killing, Itachi has her under chakra oath to do as he says for a month and a half." His statement made he went off to find Zetsu to enlist his help, though Zetsu was already on the case.

**-Outside by the lake-**

Like Takisha, Kenzie had been aware of the men's return after the first round of screaming. She just didn't get moving until she heard the second wave. Getting to her feet slowly at first Kenzie did the first thing that came to mind, which was to climb a tree as high as her groggy body could take her. She actually managed to climb close to the very top of the tree until she stopped on a firm branch she could cling to. Safely clutched to the tree she kept a wide gaze on the ground below, the trees around her and the branches above her.

Kenzie managed to stifle a yawn on her arm at the same moment Zetsu surfaced from the trunk of the tree behind her. The yawn gone she returned to the scanning of territory. Zetsu patiently watched Kenzie scan all the area around her, except for behind her. How Pein expected her to be able to work with two of the most paranoid men in the world was a question that popped up to mind. Deciding he'd given her enough time of freedom he hissed," _To yell for Kisame and Hidan? _Or not to yell for Hidan and Kisame? That is the question you do not get to answer."

"Zetsu!...Zetsuuuuu, please don't!" Kenzie maneuvered herself so she could give Zetsu pathetic puppy dog eyes that pleaded for mercy she knew she wouldn't get. If she was quick and lucky she could make an escape at the same time that Zetsu called out for her future murderers.

Shaking his head with a sadistic smile he took in a deep breathe, at the sound of his deep inhale Kenzie cautiously got to her feet and made ready to jump, only she was jostled by Zetsu making the branch shake. With nothing to grab Kenzie fell off the branch. At the same time she fell off the branch she heard Zetsu yell," I FOOOUUND HEEEER!"

Curling up into a tiny ball to protect herself she thought out of sheer desperation,' Even if he is going to kill me, I would really appreciate it if Kisame caught me before I hit the ground!' Even though she knew Zetsu had called out she felt her own mind had summoned him. For Kisame did indeed catch Kenzie before she hit the ground. Feeling a very strong and warm embrace around her she lifted her head and cracked an eye open. Seeing Kisame without a smile (or blush) she squirmed a little in his hold and croaked out," T-thanks?"

"You might want to hold your thank yous until after we finish your punishment but still leave you alive." Kenzie's heart beat went from just barely recovering to barely beating at all. Looking around Kisame's shoulder she was very displeased to see a smiling Hidan.

More out of instinct than anything Kenzie clung onto Kisame's shirt. Avoiding eye contact she squeaked," Will it be as bad as Jenna's punishment or do I get off a bit easier?"

Kisame and Hidan exchanged glances, the telepathic message sent Kisame gave Kenzie a pat on the head, threw her over his shoulder then began walking back to the cave.

Wiggling against his hold Kenzie yelled up at the now laughing Zetsu," I'll make sure you never eat another person as long as I'm still alive!"

"You mean after everything that's about to happen to you! _Just because they can't kill you doesn't mean they won't hesitate from making you wish you were dead!" _Zetsu cackled hysterically as an angry wide eyed Kenzie began struggling more fiercely for freedrom.


	18. Akatsuki Hunt

**J: IT LIVES! THIS FANFICTION IS STILL ALIVE! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**T,K:"Slaps Jenna on both cheeks."**

**J: Thanks.**

**K: Happy to do it again.**

**J: As I just diabolically proclaimed this fanfiction is still being done just at a pace that is almost non-existent. If you want to thank anyone for this miracle, you should be thanking lightwolfheart for her constant complaining and begging of me to type more xD And now time for the new addition!**

**THANKS TO: PrincessAnna-Uchiha Lover **(Your question shall now be answered after far too many months of waiting lol.) **.is. **(Thank you for the sympathy, but sadly I am getting use to the torture -.-") **Kakashi Forever **(There were already more than enough people hunting us thank you :P) **twilightvampirepunk **(mwahahahahahha!)

**J: Annnnnd, no one asked for a disclaimer! Meaning we have to do it. "Looks to where Takisha and Kenzie were standing and finds empty air.) I mean I have to do it.**

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN ANY NARUTO CHARACTERS NAMES, JUST MYSELF, AND TAKISHA AND KENZIE OWN THEMSELVES!  
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Chapter Sixteen – Akatsuki Hunt**

Jenna lay on the living room floor covered in gray paint, Takisha lay next to her in her slave outfit once more and her face and hair were covered in soot and dust from being in close proximity to the exploding furniture in her room. **(T: Note: There would also be tears streaming down my face.)** Kenzie had yet to be released from Hidan's clutches, Kisame had made her repaint the walls and clean the jell-o out of his water bed. Takisha claimed she saw Kenzie stumble out of Kisame's room only to be dragged away by Hidan with one hand because his other hand was holding an outfit she couldn't identify due to lack of concentration.

Rolling over onto her side Jenna groaned," What are the chances they'll leave us alone for a while now?"

"The same chances of Hidan letting me out of this hellish costume before all the others see it." Kenzie's disgruntled voice made Jenna and Takisha roll to face the other direction, only to quickly roll to face the other way to resist laughing right in Kenzie's face.

The costume that Hidan had punished Kenzie to was a two piece white angel's costume that sparkled with white wings attached at the back. She was even wearing a gold sequined hair band to act as a halo. Kenzie let them get their giggles and snorts out of their systems so she could sit on the couch without having to listen to it. Flopping face down Kenzie mumbled through the couch cushions," Look at my back and tell me what's there. Hidan drew something on my back before kicking me out of his room in this nightmare."

Exchanging a nervous glance the girls got enough energy to crawl over to Kenzie and look at her back. The double hiss from her friends made Kenzie's blood chill a few degrees. Almost reluctant Kenzie asked," What? What did Hidan put on my back?"

"Well…He's drawn the Jashin symbol in blood right in the middle of your back." Takisha wanted to clean it off, but at the same time felt no desire to touch a blood symbol. Especially since she didn't know if it would kill Kenzie or not. Kenzie responded to this news by reburying her face in the cushions and letting out many, many loud angry curses.

After she cooled down she deliberately rolled off the couch and sat up, putting her back against the couch she began to rub against it vigorously. Takisha cringed at the thought of the after burn that was bound to leave. Kenzie rubbed for two minutes until she looked ready to cry turning her back to them she asked," Is it still there? Or is just the rest of my back missing?"

"Uh…It's still there, and now it seems to be glowing…I think you made it angry Kenzie." Jenna, ever the oblivious, gave Kenzie's raw red back a good hard poke. Kenzie responded by spinning around and slapping Jenna on the head, very hard. Rubbing her sore head Jenna made a face then went off to find the aloe salve she'd asked Konan to buy for future sun burns she was bound to get on missions and day watches of the grounds.

Holding perfectly still to prevent further agitations to her back Kenzie asked just for something to talk about," What do you think the guys are doing now?"

"Well, Deidara doesn't know about his cut up shirts yet, so he's probably searching for something else that he can blow up and make me cry. Kakuzu went to his room to check for all his hidden money. Hidan and Kisame I haven't the slightest notion. Itachi is probably searching his wardrobe for something nasty for Jenna to wear when she starts slaving for him. Zetsu should still be on patrol, and Sasori will be tinkering with his puppets."

"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY SHIRTS, UN?"

"Correction, Deidara will now be interrogating us for answers towards his shirts." Takisha pointed to the living room doorway where Deidara appeared practically frothing at the mouth.

Having been tortured and brutalized for the past few hours the girls didn't even blink when Deidara got right in their faces to demand," Which one of you did this to my shirts, un?"

Jenna walked into the living room just in time for Takisha and Kenzie to point to her. Deidara turned his deranged blue eye to her. Sighing she threw the aloe salve to Kenzie and just walked off to her room with Deidara right behind her.

Takisha was applying the salve to Kenzie's still glowing back at the same time Tobi walked into the living room. After a quick scan of the room for recording jutsus he became Madara to ask," So, how are you two holding up from all this fun so far?" The glares of absolute hatred spoke everything they thought of him at that moment.

Quietly chuckling to himself Madara ruffled Kenzie and Takisha's hair before they could attempt to hurt him **(J: Key word there is "attempt.") **The salve fully rubbed in Takisha wiped her hands clean and got to her feet. Stretching her arms above her head she yawned," Should I not feed them and get in more shit, or feed them to pacify the beasts?"A sudden 'BANG' and a trail of smoke coming from the direction of Jenna's room made Kenzie raise an eyebrow in a way that asked, ' Does that answer your question?' Takisha sighed and went off to the kitchen to make tacos. The only thing she could make with what little ingredients they had in the kitchen.

Kenzie decided that her back was cool enough to go find a change of clothes, when Hidan had put the outfit on her she'd never heard him say she couldn't change out of it later. 'But first I want to see what happened in Jenna's room.'

Kenzie was almost to the door when a very satisfied Deidara walked out of Jenna's room. He saw Kenzie's outfit, stopped, smirked demonically, almost hungrily and asked while approaching her slowly," Did Hidan put you in that, un?" Kenzie didn't respond, she was too busy trying not to have a heart attack from how cold her blood had gone. Deidara looked different, almost…Jirayaish.

Kenzie's silence cued Deidara onto what she was thinking," Yes, I am different, un. Not in a good way either, un. Well, not for you or the other two anyways, un. You see, after I watched the majority of Jenna's wardrobe go up in smoke I made up my mind that I was done taking it easy on you three, un. That's right. The blonde haired man you've been dealing with for the past month or so was only half of what I really was, un. Now I'm going full out!"

'I-I can't move I'm so scared! Move feet! Move!' As Deidara had explained Kenzie's blood had gone so cold that it froze her body in place. Her eyes were huge and her heart wouldn't stop beating at a thousand beats per second. Barely able to breathe she managed to squeak, "B-but Leader said you guys-"She was cut off by a finger being put against her lips, only putting a myriad of chills and goose bumps through her spine.

"Leader-sama did declare no killing or raping, but you know what? Leader won't be back for another, oh, three to four hours from now, un. Aw, don't look so scared Kenzie-chan. I don't plan on doing anything yet, un. First I'm going to go have a chat with all the others; I was supposed to meet them outside a few minutes ago. Run along to Jenna now, un. I'm sure she'll appreciate some help cleaning up the ashes off her floor." Deidara took away his finger and calmly walked away to go meet the other Akatsuki members.

Kenzie's heart and body took possibly a whole of two minutes to connect with each other. At a run she burst through Jenna's door, grabbed her in a hug and practically sobbed," I-I'm so scared! We're in SO much trouble Jenna! We need to pack our things and go as far as our stupid binding seals will let us. I'll go tell Takisha, you start packing whatever you have left!"

Kenzie moved to do just as she'd said; Jenna grabbed hold of her arm to hold her in place. Her eyes hard and serious she asked," What happened that scared you so much? Nothing but Kisame or Hidan scares you Kenzie. Now what happened?"

Kenzie took a deep breathe and very calmly explained," Deidara met me out in the hall; he looked just like Jiraya in the eye. In the hall he told me he wasn't holding back anymore. He said he'd been going out only 50 percent since we've been here. Not only that, but he just went outside to have a meeting with the others, probably to talk about raping us since Leader is apparently not going to be back for another three to four hours!" The more Kenzie talked the more Jenna feared, her won heart speeding up she let go of Kenzie and bolted out of the room.

Takisha was reaching for a box of taco shells when she was tackled from behind. Glaring over her shoulder at the cause for her fall Takisha swallowed her anger. Jenna and Kenzie looked ready to crawl into a coffin and kill themselves. Pushing them off of her, her initial question was," Who did what to who?"

In a rush they gushed out what had happened, at the end Takisha rubbed her temples," So you want to run as far as the chokers will let us and just hide outside? When for all we know, all that stuff Deidara said was just meant to scare you Kenzie. Or have you forgotten that Deidara is an A Class Pervert?" Takisha's words made Jenna stop and think about things, Kenzie just refused to listen. They didn't see the look in Deidara's eye, or hear the voice he'd spoken to her with.

Takisha felt very confident that the only real problem they had to deal with was Deidara messing with their heads. "Actually everything they said was true, un. And now all the other guys agree too,un." The three spun around only to nearly faint from rapid blood loss via their noses.

Not a single one of the male Akatsuki members was wearing their cloaks or shirts, their hair was wet as well. Barely breathing Jenna croaked," Wh-what's all this?"

"THIS is your true punishment, what you endured before is nothing to what we're going to do to you now." Hidan stepped forward holding a very big, metal chain net, attached to the ends were small metal weights.

Eyes transfixed on the net Takisha cleared her throat so she could ask in a clear voice that wasn't clogged with the immense amount of fear she was feeling," What, uh, what is that metal chain net for?"

All five men suddenly grew evil crooked smirks that froze the girls' hearts in place, from both fear and longing. They not only looked scary as hell, but they looked sexy too. Pulling the net open with Kakuzu's help Hidan answered rather jubilantly," Oh, this old thing? We use this for special occasions, such as the little party we're going to be having tonight. Now come here!" With a heave Kakuzu and Hidan threw the metal net at the girls. The sight of the new sailing towards them managed to kick the connection between their brains and bodies back into working order. In a mad rush the girls ran every which way in order to get away from the net.

With a loud 'clunk' the net hit the stone floor empty, the prey which it should have captured was making a beeline for the different exits. On a normal capture or kill mission the Akatsuki men wouldn't have let them get three steps close to the exits. However, this wasn't a normal capture or kill mission. This was an agreed Akatsuki Hunt, Hidan wasn't getting all the fun this time. The girls got a 10 second start before Sasori and Deidara went after Jenna, Kakuzu and Hidan went after Takisha, and Kisame and Itachi went after Kenzie. If the girls were hurt or "other" wise during the game, then the agreed excuse to Leader was it was an accident of training that the girls had asked for.

At the 10 second mark the men exchanged looks with each other then disappeared as a phantom might in a foggy night.

** -Hiding in Zetsu's Room Under the Bed-**

"I entirely blame Deidara for this! If that dip hadn't said anything or gotten serious he wouldn't have said anything to the others!" Jenna nodded to Takisha's rant as she beat her fist on the ground. Kenzie swatted her on the arm and made the shush motion so they could hear any movement out in the halls. Even if they strained their ears to the point of going deaf they wouldn't hear their footsteps…On the ceiling.

The girls strained their ears for another minute, hearing nothing they crawled out from under the bed. Doing stretched to limber up Jenna asked," Okay, who is going where? We have to handle this like any other Hidan hunt."

"With the big difference of there being SIX guys hunting us down, instead of just ONE!" Kenzie made sure to put emphasis on the vast difference in numbers so her two casual friends could fully comprehend their insane situation.

Takisha stretched up then down to her toes, as she stretched she pointed out another important fact," Unlike all our other Hidan hunts, we won't just be tied up and let go once all we're all caught. You saw those creepy sexy smirks, they are going to mess us up something bad. I'm getting a vibe for blood loss, bruises and broken bones." Takisha didn't stop exercising as she told them this, but she still noticed that Jenna and Kenzie had frozen in place mid stretch.

Limber and ready Takisha cracked her neck, knuckles and fingers," Whelp, no fun staying here. Good luck running guys. Hopefully they won't give us black eyes so we can't see each other. See you!" With a two finger salute she opened the door, checked both ends and made a dash in the direction of her room. She wanted to grab some weapons to be able to stand a chance against the army of men that would be hunting her.

Finishing her own stretches Jenna jogged on the spot, took hold of the door knob and told Kenzie," Time to make my heart work harder than it should. What really sucks about this is that that I'm actually getting excited, like literally excited. See you when they beat on you." She gave a smile then booked it for the doorway, she didn't know who was hunting who and figured she'd be safer in the woods.

"Yes, that is the most appropriate thing to say before leaving to be the pray of a man hunt." Kenzie twisted her upper torso back and forth to earn a loud 'crack', feeling much looser she shook out her arms and legs, threw open the door and ran for the exit. If they wanted to capture her she was going to use the tools they'd given her against them.

On the hallway ceiling the still shirtless men had taken note of who went in which direction. Hand signaling to each other to meet back at the lake after capturing their targets.

Kakuzu and Hidan continued down the hallway to see what Takisha was up to, Itachi, Kisame, Sasori, and Deidara went to the exit to begin properly hunting.

** -In Takisha's Room-**

She could sense the zombie and the immortal standing a few meters away. They hadn't said a word or attempted to approach her after getting into her room, by walking on the ceiling. **(T: I may be blonde, but I'm still observant and aware. Because Itachi and Deidara were shirtless they had nothing to tuck their overly long pony tails into, thus letting them hang down low enough for me to catch a glimpse of.)**

She tucked away as many kunais, bombs, and smoke pellets she figured she'd need, which meant a lot. Her sandals strapped tight and her hair pulled back into a pony tail she felt as ready as she'd ever be Takisha rolled a smoke pellet around in her palm. Keeping her back to the trained hunter she casually announced," Alright, time to head out for my doom." With a flick of her wrist she launched the smoke pellet filling the tiny room with smoke that could barely been seen through.

Having done more training on her own spare time (without telling the guys) Takisha had mastered the basics of chakra control, and even did some research to learn one of the techniques that was taught to a student at the ninja academy their second year. The shadow clone. Performing the hand signs she focused all her attention and energy into a solidification of herself. The end result was a faceless body that had the same hair and everything else that matched her, 'Well, it's a good start. I bet Jenna and Kenzie can't even make a solid form.'

The shadow clone, knowing her thoughts took off through the doorway. Takisha watched two large forms on the ceiling quickly take pursuit. She gave them a three seconds distance before running in the opposite direction towards the trenches. If her assumption was right Itachi had only just discovered the entrance, meaning no one knew where it exited out onto. 'Hopefully not out of range of the collar's limits, the last thing I need is to choke to death and be found two months later halfway decomposed!' The thought made her shiver but not deteriorate her decision.

**-Out in the Woods-**

Jenna had gone as far as the Akatsuki property line, taken five steps back and climbed up the nearest tree. With the assistance of her chakra she managed to climb half way up to find the widest branch it had. Settling her back against the trunk she began to count in her head,' One stupid blonde Akatsuki member, two stupid blonde Akatsuki members...' She got as far as twelve stupid blonde Akatsuki members when she heard a twig snap. She didn't bother to get up, and she didn't bother to start worrying. She had a plan and would attempt to stick with it.

**-Also Hiding in the Woods Closer to the Pond-**

Kenzie could see the pond from the large tree she stood behind and continued to work out the scenarios. 'If they come from behind then I can run forward to the pond. If they come at me from the front then I'll have to run around the trees until I can get to the pond. Underneath isn't possible unless they got Zetsu to help out...Or Kisame could burrow through the tree root system. From the sides I might be able to dodge and maneuver over to the pond before getting severely hurt. As for above...I'll just run.' Her mind all sorted out Kenzie took out a kunai to carve little things into the bark.

In the middle of carving a tooth for her sharkish looking chibi man she heard a giant splash from the pond. Pulling out the kunai she peeked around the tree's trunk, at first glance someone inexperienced to the Akatsuki's mind tricks would assume it was just the top of Shred's dorsal fin doing circles in the water. But to Kenzie's keenly trained artistic eye she could immediately tell that the dorsal fin was far to small and there was a weird bend at the very tip. 'If that's Kisame then Weasel Butt can't be too far away either.' A glance over her shoulder, to the left and right revealed nothing. The movement of green from above cued her in just in time to jump backwards.

**-Crawling in the Trenches-**

"I can't believe Jenna actually slept in here...Actually, I'd be able to sleep anywhere if I thought it was safe from her worst nightmare...Oh thank Saint Jimmy, there's the light. My neck hasn't tried to suffocate me so I must still be in the perimeters of it's reach." Takisha had whispered encouragement and random mutterings to herself since she crawled into the little tunnel. She guessed that they might be able to pick up the noise if they were in the same hall as the tunnel entrance, but she'd felt the clone break a good distances away. It was the weirdest sensation to feel something distantly connected to you suddenly disappear.

Takisha froze half a foot away from the exit where sweet golden sunshine and soft tickling breezes called to her. A dark shape had moved in front of the exit and she was fairly certain it was a foot that belonged to Hidan. 'Crap, it's just my frigg'n luck they show up. Okay options? Go backwards? Result: They could be inside by then. Next. Pray it's just Jenna or Kenzie and keep going. Result: Most likely not them and be the first one caught. Next. Stab the foot and make a run for it? Result:...Unknown...Okay, that should be effective enough to work.' Wiggling around to move her hand to her waist Takisha grabbed hold of a kunai, shimmying further forward in order to be close enough Takisha sent up a quick prayer then jabbed the foot in front of her. To her very brief relief she heard a loud masculine yelp of pain. As soon as the foot went out of sight she rushed forward out of the tunnel, past the one percent impressed Hidan and Kakuzu and into the surrounding foliage.

Shaking his foot to remove some pain Hidan growled," Little bitch! Come back here and face your punishment like a man!"

"I'm NOT a man!" Takisha being absolutely proud of her gender couldn't resist yelling this back. What she didn't realize was that that was what they'd wanted.

Kakuzu hand signaled Hidan to continue with his verbal and slow walking approach. As Hidan stepped forward he yelled," That was very obvious by that failure of a thing you call a shadow clone! Only a whimpy female like yourself could screw that up."

Takisha heard Hidan's approach and quickly maneuvered away from him while low to the ground, her eyes focused on Hidan's feet she called back," That one was my first successful one! Wait until I practice more, you'll wake up surrounded by my clones!"

"That's if you're not too crippled to practice." Hidan leaped forward at the spot Takisha should have been, only to land on a log. 'Since when did the bitch learn substitution? According to the puppet freak they should only be learning control at this point.' The smallest rustling of leaves drew his attention to the bush on his right. Pulling out his scythe he smiled smugly," No amount of self training can save your pathetic ass from me!" He took a swing and cut the bush in half, only to find another log with a ridiculous happy face and a bomb. Hidan managed to call Takisha a bitch before the bomb went off in his face. In the distance he could hear both Kakuzu and Takisha laughing at him.

**-On the Large Tree Branch-**

'It's been a total of two minutes and they still haven't jumped me. So they either know about my trap, or they're trying to draw me into one. This might take a while.' Sighing Jenna shifted to make herself more comfortable, at the rate things were progressing in her life she'd have plenty of time to do some book searching on the collar curses they'd been given.

Another close twig snap caused Jenna to look over out of reflex, if she hadn't she would have been in trouble. The twig snap was Hiroku flying at her with a poisoned dagger pointed forward. Dodging out of the way Jenna drew a kunai and stood ready.

A tingling sensation caused her to look down to find the tiniest of clay spiders crawling up her leg. Knowing better than to swat it off then squish it, she grabbed hold of the clay creepy crawly and hurled it down off the tree. A resulting 'splat' and, "The hell,un?" Gave Jenna knowledge to her 'playmates' whereabouts. Smirking Jenna leisurely strolled back closer to the tree trunk where an unseen wire pulled tight barely showed against the wood. Jenna easily cut the taught wire, before her trap took effect she jumped over and up to the next large tree branch. Igniting and exploding the branch gave way and plummeted to the ground.

During the branch's fall Jenna had listened carefully for any sound of a stupid blonde getting hurt, she was greatly disappointed to hear nothing but the snapping and breaking of tree branches.

"If we hadn't moved at the last second we would have been crushed under all that lumber,un." Jenna tensed and jumped back just as a much larger clay spider fell from above and went 'splat' on the branch. "Katsu!" The pancaked spider blew up and sent tree fragments flying into her face. Including her eyes.

Rubbing vigorously at her watering eyes Jenna grumbled," Dammit, dammit, dammit!" It was only the sound of rushing air that saved her from Sasori's Hiroku. She'd jumped back another meter and forced herself to keep her eyes open despite the pain she felt.

**-By Pond-**

Having jumped back in time Kenzie had dodged Itachi's kunai dive, the depth that the kunai traveled revealed that she would surely have been dead had she not moved. Glaring up at the trees that continued to hide Itachi she cursed his use of natural camouflage, even though he was only doing what he was taught. 'Whereas I was taught to do what exactly?...Right, Sasori and Kisame aren't good teachers. But Itachi made sure to up my physical attributes.' This discovered Kenzie took off through the trees that were closest to the pond. "Is there a point to your useless running?" Itachi's bodiless voice surprised her enough to miss an upcoming root and fall on her face. She didn't miss the faintest sound of Itachi's laughter.

She also didn't miss the soft sound of Itachi landing on the ground not too far away from her, using the training she had been taught by Weasel Butt himself she roll dodged out of the way of a rain of kunais. Only to be blown five feet away by the paper bombs attached at the hilts. **(K: Okay seriously, what is with you and the bombs? T: You are not allowed to turn into Deidara, I strictly forbid it. J: I just decided out of the blue that this chapter would be filled with them. Is that really a bad thing? T: Only this chapter. J: Yes, yes I hear you. Only this chapter can contain a bajillion bombs.)**

Using the nearest tree for support Kenzie heaved herself up to her feet to face the stoic Itachi. Straightening her back Kenzie huffed," You tricks will not get me this time! I've had enough experience with your shit to expect anything and everything."

"Did you expect a trap hole right where you're standing?" The glint in Itachi's eye was one of pure trickster evil, which is not often seen in his eyes. Evil, evil killing intent, perverted evil, yes. Trickster evil indicating a joke or a scheme that will permanently mess with your head, only when he feels like it.

Kenzie, unsure of whether he was telling the truth or not, quickly jumped backwards onto the roots that stuck out of the ground. She gave him a smug smirk that lasted only a second,for Itachi's own sudden smirk told her she'd failed. A sudden 'SNAP' sounded and Kenzie found herself hanging upside down by the ankle. Swinging back and forth Kenzie glared at Itachi as well as growled," You friggn Weasel Butt! This won't hold me for long!"

"It will be long enough for me to retrieve the metal net from Kisame. I'm sure it will be nice and cold since he's been dragging it around in the pond." Itachi walked past Kenzie with a push so she swung even more and headed off at a leisurely pace towards the pond.

Kenzie grumbled more obscenities at Itachi's back but kept them to a quiet level so as not to draw attention to her actions. From past experiences and late nights of emergency situation practices **(T: Disguised as girls only sleepovers when Konan isn't there.) **Kenzie was working on her escape. A sharpened miniature nail file she kept in her leg holster, built up abdomen muscles and her current swinging momentum allowed Kenzie to reach the cord to cut herself free. The only thing they could never solve during emergency situations was how to cut yourself free and not get hurt in the resulting landing. 'Thud.' "Oww." Rubbing the arm she'd landed on Kenzie got to her feet and took off towards the pond, only by going through the woods closest to the pond.

**-Hiding in Another Group of Bushes-**

Takisha quickly smothered her giggles before Kakuzu located her, thankfully she'd pinpointed his position first due to his ridiculous laughter. She could have sworn his laughter was loud enough that even a newbie like Jenna could have found him.

Hidan retreated from the explosion site to land on the tree closest to Kakuzu. Kakuzu's eyes told Hidan that he thought Hidan was a total failure in life. Hidan in response gave Kakuzu the middle finger, only earning an eye roll. Kakuzu hand signed that he had located Takisha an planned on snagging her in one move. Hidan signaled back that he could do it without his help. Kakuzu shrugged at this childishness and slipped into the shadows cast by the trees. 'If he catches her I will be so pissed!' Hidan reached into his pocket pouch and took out an apple to snack on.

Takisha was flat out on her stomach with her kunai in hand. Having gotten Hidan by surprise she was sure that Kakuzu was going to come after her next. 'So I best be watching for-' "TENTACLES!" Takisha had looked down at the area near her feet right as a group of the creepy things were snaking towards her.

Leaping out of the bushes she used for cover she failed to notice Kakuzu flying down at her at top speed after launching himself from a tree branch. He got close enough to bring his fist down on her skull, only to hit another log. Takisha reappeared from his left to attempt a side swipe with her kunai, only to hit empty air. Landing back on the ground she realized that Hidan had been oddly quiet. 'A quiet Hidan means one of two things. He is sleeping or-' "SURPRISE!" Hidan leapt out of the ground from behind and fastened his arms around her in a tight and unbreakable vice grip.

**-Running for her life-**

"Why do I 'gasp' get the 'puff' feeling 'wheeze' that I do most of 'gasp, wheeze' the running?" Jenna muttered this out between gasps of air as she quickly dodged around tree roots and jumped over the unavoidable bushes. Right behind her were Sasori (inside Hiroku) and Deidara on his giant clap bird. Having survived the blast from the exploding spider the boys had decided to go with the direct approach and immediately give chase. Itachi had kept all the men up on the girls' rate of physical progress, and it didn't surprise them that the shortest of the three could barely run five laps to save her life.**(T: For the record, I stand at six and a half laps, Kenzie can do at least seven when motivated enough. K: Which means I get whatever I want for breakfast :D) **Knowing this Sasori and Deidara had agreed that the best method of capture was to run her till she dropped then drag her away effortlessly for further..."punishment." Their plan was already working, their target had started to slow dow a little at first, but now after nearly four minutes of running she was barely managing to push herself, even with an adrenaline rush.

Her legs were weak and her lungs were crying for a break, but stopping meant admitting she was the weakest. 'All I need is a miracle, ANYTHING WILL WORK! PLEASE!'

Jenna's silent plead was answered when she heard a voice not too far away yelling," Let me go! I will bite you!...NO! I WILL NOT BITE YOU THERE YOU PERVERT!"

Quickly swerving Jenna found the source. Takisha was in a tight hold by Hidan and Kakuzu was advancing with the metal net of death. "Excuse me, coming through!" Not even bothering to think about the consequences Jenna crashed into Hidan's back so that she could place a smoke bomb. Since the men had decided to hunt without their cloaks or any shirts Hidan felt the paper on his bare back before he heard the 'hisssss' of it burning. With no other choice Hidan let go of Takisha to try and remove the bomb.

Given her freedom Takisha didn't spare a second in running after Jenna, catching up to her (since she was barely breathing) Takisha cheered," Thanks! Anything I can do to help you?"

"Ya 'puff' Give me a few 'wheeze' seconds to actually breathe!" Jenna could barely say that without collapsing from exhaustion and lack of oxygen.

"Say no more!" Digging in her utility pouch Takisha pulled out three smoke bombs she'd made herself **(T: Yay for Kurenai's science classes!) **Since she'd made them herself she got to modify the original recipe, thus turning it into any young man's nightmare.

Sasori, Deidara, Kakuzu and a very bloody Hidan (barely got the bomb off in time) weren't very far behind the girls, allowing them a clear view of their actions. When they saw her throw the smoke pellets they thought nothing of it,until they went into the smoke and nearly died from the overwhelming smell of flowers and other overly feminine fragrances. "'Cough' Ugh, sneaky little twit, un! This explains why she attacked me with Konan's perfumes last week, un." Deidara managed to get this out before breaking out into a fit of sneezes. In the rush to get out of the smoke they failed to notice that Jenna had quickly turned sharply to the left to hide behind a tree. Takisha stayed brave and continued running straight.

**-By the Pond-**

Kenzie much for multitasking in terms of cleaning or homework, but with running she could handle a little more to do. At that moment Kenzie was skimming through the trees that bordered the pond and at the same time she kept her sights on the pond itself. She'd nearly tripped twice from not catching the upraised roots, when she finally did trip it wasn't because of tree roots. She'd done a comical trip when Itachi had called Kisame out of the pond with the metal net slung over his shoulder. There was a decent amount of distance between her and the men, but it wasn't enough to not see how sexy Kisame looked coming out of the water with the sunlight causing the water on his body to glisten. 'Oh god why didn't I have a camera to catch that moment?'

Sighing forlornly Kenzie continued until she felt a safe gap between her and where she used to be. Sitting down in the growing shadow of a tree she took a deep calming breathe and closed her eyes to focus on the water nearby. This was an exercise she'd been fiddling with for a few weeks that Kisame had only tried to teach her once. The instructions sounded simple = You center your thoughts only on the water. Then you create a mental thread between your mind and the water. Lastly you send your chakra through that mental thread in order to manipulate the water as you see fit. However the day that Kisame had tried to teach this to her was one of her "flop" days. Kisame had become frustrated and told her she had to master the basics of basics before he even considered teaching her something semi-advanced.

On her own Kenzie had managed to manipulate water sources into spelling her name in dirt and kinda rinsing off the dishes when it was her turn to do supper or breakfast dishes. Feeling that the extra pressure might be helpful Kenzie knew exactly what to do with her large source of water. 'I will be called juvenile afterwards for sure, but if I'm going to get in shit I better be able to get a good laugh in the process.'

**-Advancing towards the Pond-**

Takisha's self made smoke bombs had bought both her and Jenna a bit of time that let her think about where to go next. Her first thought was to make a big U turn and try to sneak back to the cave, but the firm possibility of the guys intercepting her pushed it away quickly. A small glimpse of the pond a ways ahead had made up her mind that she might get some assistance from the friendly neighborhood carnivore that wasn't Zetsu. "It's just you and us again girlie!" Hidan's yell instinctively made Takisha look back over her shoulder to see the fast approaching dooms day duo.

"Don't say girlie! It sounds really wrong and creepy when you say it!" Takisha's complaint only earner her a bout of laughter at her own expense.

The pond getting closer Takisha needed to concentrate on her next move. 'Do I have any meat or food of any kind? Damn, no I don't and that canine minded beast won't cooperate without a treat...Oh!' A devious smile spread across Takisha's face at the rather unorthodox idea she'd been struck with. Pushing herself a little bit more for distance Takisha went into her pouch and pulled out a fresh kunai. 'Now it's just a matter of timing and a lot of luck.'

**-Curled up in hiding-**

Jenna figured she'd gotten a full minute of breathing time when she heard Deidara sing out too sweetly," Jeeennna-chaaan! Where are you cutie, un?" Shuddering from the sugar coated voice she got up a bit to get into a crouch and scuttled over to a nearby clump of big healthy bushes.

Parting the leaves for surveillance she caught a glimpse of Deidara's blonde head walking off in the opposite direction. 'My cat senses be screaming of a trap.' Looking away from the spot that Deidara had gone out of sight she focused her eyes on the area around the place he'd been before going behind the tree.

Nothing looked out of place and there wasn't any signs of a ground trap such as clusters of leaves or dirt patches. The nearest trees weren't marked or set with bombs. Everything looked absolutely normal, which only spiked Jenna's paranoia to another level. Unlike the other two Jenna was just getting the grasp of keeping her chakra concentrated in one area of he boy in order to use it for the basics. Combine that with the chakra's feline qualities and you get a very, very, jumpy person. Which was exactly what Deidara and Sasori (perched up in a tree watching) wanted from her.

**-Standing Right Next to the Pond-**

Kisame shifted the metal net slung over his shoulder while his other hand rested on the hilt of Samehada. His eyes on Itachi he asked in a semi-whisper," So if she broke free of your little ankle trap, where the hell is she now?" Unlike his partnet Kisame had been rather inactive since the beginning of the hunt. All he'd really been doing was dragging the metal net along the bottom of the pond so it was wet and freezing for final capture.

Itachi's eyes were unactivated and closed so he could focus more on his hearing, just as it had been his hearing that caught wind of Kenzie's release. No twig snaps, rustling leaves or startled wild life could be heard and Itachi's patience with his partner was thinning. The fluctuating tones of Kisame's voice told of apprehension towards this assignment and Itachi would not be pleased if their target managed to escape them. The sound of a wave caught Itachi's notice in time to launch him back towards the trees. _'Maybe now Kisame will not think of holding back.'_

**-Zipping Along-**

Hidan and Kakuzu were starting to get a bit suspicious of their prey. They'd seen Takisha withdraw a kunai but she'd made no movement to use it, in fact she'd begun to slow down. Whether it was a trap or fatigue they couldn't tell, the girl's face had remained facing forward since she'd looked back to confirm thy were following her.

Takisha's incremented decrease in speed was allowing her lungs to catch more oxygen, thus allowing her mind to process exactly what she was about to do and how this was going to effect things in the future. _'If my plan works I have only to accomplish a few more minutes of freedom and an even worse punishment than what was already planned...Still can't be any worse than Jenna's deal with Itachi!' _The reassuring thought brought more of a skip to her further decreased in speed motion.

The change from running to quick prancing brought serious doubt to Hidan's mind that they were still following the same person. Kakuzu remained unfazed and had decided that the girl had gone to another state of mind in order to save her sanity from the torture that awaited her.

Takisha's opportunity to execute her plan appeared in the form of a tree branch that was just low enough for her to reach from a good strong jump. Taking in a large breathe she bunched her muscles and launched herself up to the branch, instead of landing on it she used it to launch herself for a second time backwards towards Hidan.

Sneering at the little girl's surge of stupid bravery Hidan swung out his scythe from behind his back ready to block anything she attempted. He expected her to go for his head or hut, he did not expect her to deliberately aim for the open space next to him to slice off his hand right at the last second. Bellowing in pain and rage he reeled back a couple of steps, allowing Takisha to scoop up his bleeding hand by the fingers and continue running for the lake. Kakuzu had done nothing to help and simply observed. After she'd grabbed the hand he finally understood what she was planning, chuckling darkly he told the severly bleeding Hidan," I believe we've been a positive influence if she's doing what I think she'd doing."

"Argh, what the hell are you talking about you fucking asshole? Don't just stand there laughing, go get me damn hand back." Kakuzu's words barely got through Hidan's pain adled brain. The only thing he could comprehend was Kakuzu laughing at his expense.

Kakuzu looked over Hidan's gushing appendage and was impressed to see the cut had been straight and clean. _'A bonus to being a good cook I'm sure.' _ Sending out a tentacle Kakuzu wrapped it as tightly as possible above his bleeding wrist to cut off circulation. He also used the tentacle as a leash to drag the snivelling pile that was Hidan along with him after Takisha.

**-Behind her tree-**

Originally Kenzie had only wanted to grab Kisame's net and pull it back into the pond. At the last minute she'd changed her mind and just sent a massive tidal wave to hopefully get Itachi drowned in the process. Once the wave had erupted over the edge of the pond Kenzie quickly cut her chakra off from the water to prevent it being traced back to her. What she hadn't expected was the amount of chakra it actually used, slumping back against her tree she huffed," Now I understand why Sasori tells me to build up my chakra. Pheeew. Okay, let's see the damage I did...And there's no one there, that cannot be a good sign."

"And this won't feel very good." Kenzie had layed down on her stomach in order to get a good view of the pond are she'd just drenched. In this position plus her new sensation of exhaustion led to a slow response of getting away, which she just didn't. The sudden sensation of hard, wet metal caught Kenzie so off guard that she actually screamed.

Kisame took hold of the net and hoisted it up onto his back. Because the net was metal any movement Kenzie made in her attempt to get more comfortable were heard by little 'clinks' rather than being felt. Keeping her bare arms closer to herself to prevent them being pinched she whined," How did you find me? I cut my chakra off before it could be traced. And this net is cold and painful!"

A small snort drew Kenzie's attention to the spot next to Kisame's well toned beefy shoulder where Itachi stood looking rather insulted. Making a face of hatred she grumbled," Oh, right. Weasel butt avoided the water and probably got a good view of where the connection went back to...I hate you Weasel Butt." Much to her increasing hatred Itachi cast Kenzie a smug smirk to tell her she was exactly right.

Kisame shifted the weight on his back so he could hold it more securely, to Itachi he asked," So what do we do with her now? I don't think we discussed this part."

_'Oh my god! Oh my god! I think my heart actually stopped for a full second in fear. GAH! HIS SMIRK IS MORE EVIL!' _Kenzie's breathe lodged in her throat when she looked over at Itachi to see his expression for an answer to that very important question. The smug smirk he'd worn one moment had shifted more to one side as his cold onyx eyes slid over to meet her own green orbs that must have widened to display her fear. Itachi didn't say anything and began walking back towards the cave. Whatever Itachi had decided would be a great surprise for all participants but himself.

**-Back to Jenna-**

Sasori and Deidara sat very comfortably on their tree branch observing the mental decay of their prey progress at an almost comical speed. In two minutes she'd gone from cool and composed to a very nervous jumpy mouse. The smallest noises made her flinch and scurry into a new hiding place. More than once Deidara had to refrain from dropping a ball of clay into a pile of leaves just to see her jump 20 feet or higher.

Having been their chakra teacher for over a month Sasori had come to know almost everything about the girls' different chakras and the amount of control they each had. Takisha was making the greatest progress while Jenna had made the least. Kenzie had somehow managed to control her chakra in a way that it really depended on her enthusiasm for it to work out, so she remained on the fence of leveling. Sasori had also kept notes on everything interesting or useful about the girls' abilities. In example: Takisha was able to use her spirit quality chakra to walk short distances in midair soundlessly, an ability that both Kakuzu and Hidan had agreed to be useful for missions involving recon. Another example would be Jenna's feline natured chakra effected what her mind processed. More than once she would stare in a totally different direction, but when questioned on what he'd just said or did she would repeat it back word for word.

Another more amusing side effect of her chakra and her lack of control over it was the behavioural aspects. She would always find a sunny spot to sit when he gave instructions that didn't need much movement, or she would watch an insect or leaf with the obvious desire to play with it. All in all she was a human cat just waiting to have her fur stroked in the wrong direction. And the opportunity was right in front of them.

Deidara was starting to fidget, casting a side ways glance at Sasori he whispered," Now? Can I get her now, un?" Deidara had listened to Sasori's plan as they'd continued their pursuit, and once he'd fully grasped it he'd begged to be the one that executed the final blow to leave her easy for snatching.

Sasori raised a finger to signal for him to wait just a little longer.

Jenna was going to go insane if nothing happened. Her nerves were shot and her mind was providing a billion possibilities all at the same time of what was going to happen next. The tension got to the point where she just was going to jump out of hiding to end her mental torture. _'Okay, for the last time CALM THE FUCK DOWN JENNA! Breathe!...Much better, now, why have they not-' _"AUGH MYGOD!" Jenna's thinking process was halted by the very people she was thinking about, thanks to Deidara falling on top of her and somehow putting them in the awkward position of her being on her back and him straddling her waist. **(T: Reminder: Deidara has NO SHIRT and he has let his hair down. "Puts earmuffs on from shrill fangirl screaming from around the world.")**

Laying perfectly still with her head turned to the side Jenna could only prey that Gaara would never hear of this, or actually, she prayed that Gaara would never see or hear of anything that happened with the way too hot for their own good Akatsuki members. Deidara smiled happily at his brilliant success, adding further advanced blood circulation to the poor girl underneath him Deidara pinned down her wrists. He raised his head and called out," She's entirely immobilized, un! Hurry up with the net Danna."

A soft 'thump' accompanied by the appearance of Sasori's feet caused Jenna to glare up at the jerk that trained her. Completely furious she yelled," So who the hell else knows about this problem?" The 'problem' she was speaking of was the odd reverse rag doll reaction she had. **(J: Fact: A certain breed of cats called Ragdolls have a tendency to become limp and floppy close to the same manner of a child's ragdoll, though this only occurs when picked up.) **Sasori and Jenna had learned of it while training and Sasori had somehow landed on her in the straddling position, from further 'tests' and nosebleeds they discovered it only comes into effect when Jenna has been put under pressure and straddled specifically around her waist.

Sasori opened the chest compartment of Hiroku and pulled out the metal net. Giving her a small smile he replied," After what I came home to this morning I've decided that anyone who asks and Uchiha shall be informed." He then threw the net over her just when Deidara jumped off her.

Struggling to shift the net off her Jenna let out a feral hiss that sounded an awful lot like," You'll be bald once I'm free and you're asleep!"

Totally ignoring their captive each criminal grabbed an end of her body and lifted her off the ground. They could have been worse and simply dragged her but they figured the punishment she was going to get was bad enough.

**-Finally at the pond-**

Once more short on air Takisha silently rejoiced at her accomplishment of reaching the pond. She paid no heed to the fact that the ground was squishier than normal or the foot print from Kisame's massive feet left in the mud, and instead started whistling for her life.

Not too long ago Takisha had managed to teach Shreds that her whistling meant he could get food. In less than a second the eager and always hungry shark came to the surface and began to swim in tight circles to show he was ready for feeding. Holding the hand just barely over the water Takisha turned to face her approaching hell sentencers.

Hidan and Kakuzu burst out of the woods slower than Takisha had anticipated and was slightly disappointed when they stopped right after coming out of the forest since she'd expected a full on charge. Hidan, leashed and all, looked ready to rip her limb from limb. If Kakuzu didn't have him restrained she wouldn't be surprised if he attempted to do so. But that was where the hand came into play. Holding the hand up higher Takisha asked," How much longer can Hidan go without his hand before it's no good?"

"The hand needs to be reattached within the next hour, so unless you never want to hear the end of it give me back that hand." Kakuzu's gripe about Hidan was enforced by Hidan telling Takisha he was going to sacrifice her as painfully as possible then get Jashin to bring her back to life just so he could sacrifice her again but much slower.

Takisha made a face at the continuing onslaught of sacrifices an torture and turned all her attention to the reasonable man present. Swinging the hand a little precariously Takisha told him sternly," I'm immune to death threats, as well as the noise of whiny bitchy people. Whatever Hidancould complain about would be nothing compared to my grandmother's bitching rants that I endured for the better part of my life. If you want to be spared from the future headaches you'll agree to my small conditions."

"I will listen to your ridiculous demands, but do not expect any of them to be agreed to just for the trade of this infant minded idiot." Kakuzu crossed his arms to show that his tentacles would be restrained during the negotiations.

Pulling the hand back towards herself (much to the agitation of a certain shark) Takisha went into professional mode. Her voice expressionless she stated," First and foremost: No metal net. I will gladly walk back to the cave with you. Second: When we get back to the cave blood will not be drawn, I will take a punishment that causes bruises only. And thirdly: My portion of trouble will not be mentioned to Pein, Konan is fine. Those are my only terms." Takisha hadn't blinked once during her demands and neither did Kakuzu.

Hidan had stopped his pointless moaning and groaning about his hand to listen to the exchange of agreements. The second Takisha closed her mouth he opened his," Wow, for someone clearly outnumbered and out classed you are making quite big fucking demands. Like hell you deserve any of THAT kind of treatment you little terd!"

This outbreak of verbal harassment was ignored since Kakuzu would be the one making the final call. Kakuzu agreed with what Hidan was yelling out on an obnoxious level and decided that his final answer was going to be no to everything. Only Takisha wouldn't know this," Hm. Fine, but you go nowhere until the hand is returned."

"HA! I wasn't kidnapped yesterday you jerk. Like I'm going to trust you on your word. I'm holding onto this nasty thing until we get back to the cave. And if you try anything just because we're away from the shark I will cut off a finger for each attempt."Takisha actually took insult for the clear indication that he thought she was stupid enough to fall for their obvious lie. However, in the midst of her outraged rant she lost just enough grip on the nasty hand she was holding and allowed it to leave her hold right in the midst of her arms going up over her head. The end result: 1) The hand went flying backwards into the open mouth of Shreds. 2) Hidan screamed bloody murder and attacked poor Shreds. 3) Kakuzu took advantage of the confusion to throw the net over Takisha. 4) Shred's didn't survive Hidan's hand retrieval. 5) Kakuzu decided they would have shark fin soup for supper...but they wouldn't tell Kisame until tomorrow.

Tears streamed down Takisha's face as the heartless men that were her teammates dragged her back to the cave. They'd openly announced that her punishment was going to be broken into two parts. Part one would be the emotional torture of turning her pet shark into supper. They promised the second part would be very...pleasant surprise. Pleasant for who,they did not specify. **(T: SHREDS! D8 K:0.e...I'm feeding Hidan's feet to Zetsu in Shred's memory. J: "Patting mourning friends in sympathy.")**


	19. Not The Same Ending

**J: "Angry vein"**

**K:"Poking continuously."**

**T: "Also poking."**

**J: Why?**

**K: We need to make sure you're the real thing and not our imaginations.**

**T: You updated within a few days after the last update, that hasn't happened since...since...The prequel!**

**J: Sooorrry for doing something good for the readers, though I'm sure they don't appreciate it being short. BUT there is another maybe shorter chapter next, so I should be able to get the next one up soon.**

**K: "Cough"ESSAYS"cough"**

**J: "Swamped by gloom lines." Uuuugggh. Okay, so no promises on the next chapter coming out immediately. Time to give thanks!**

**THANKS TO: ThexxMoonxxHides**(Kisame is going to have a short mourning period before thinking of getting another shark, and the next one will have a frick'n lasberbeam attached to it's head xD. It's been a while since I got a review from you by the way:P)** PrincessAnna-UchihaLover **(I don't think there's a single creature on earth that would ever think of eating Hidan's feet xD As for your questions...can't answer any of them cause it would give WAY too many spoilers!) **Neko Hoshi **(:D At last! Someone who can understand my pain! And for your sympathy and understanding I reward you with this next chapter!) **LightWolfHeart **(Ha! I updated before you could even nag at me once xP) **Kakashi Forever, Little Syringe **(You totally made me blush with your praise, and I again apologize for the lack of constant update pattern, but I'm a spur of the moment typer you could say ahha. Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as you've enjoyed all the others!)

**J: Alright, this time we actually have someone to disclaim! Thank you Kakashi Forever! Though to be honest I had to wiki you're request cause I forgot who he was ahha.**

**K: Who's disclaiming? "Stretching to run away if necessary."**

**T: "Fingers crossed" Not Deidara no Deidara!**

**J: Today we have a very new disclaimer, never before seen on my chapters! Please welcome Minato!**

**K: 8D Where! Where?**

**"Sudden flash of yellow zips around the girls then stops right behind them"**

**M: Hey. "Big happy smile."**

**J,T,K: "Tackle glomp"**

**M: Ahhaha, so you needed me to do something?**

**J: "Clinging with every ounce of strength" Yup! Can you please disclaim my story today?**

**M: Hm...Why not? "Big smile that makes T,J,K squee inside." Jenna does not own any of the Naruto characters named, and the other two own themselves. Well it's been nice ladies, gotta go back now. Later! "Zips away letting the girls fall to the ground."**

**J,K,T: D'awwwww ):**

**J: Alright so you know the drill! Give me names people so I can have more people disclaim!**

**P.S. THIS HAS GOTTEN OVER 100 REVIEWS NOW! YAAAAY! LOOOVE YOU ALLLL!  
**

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Chapter Seventeen – Not the Same Ending**

Upon dragged entry into the cave Takisha's tears instantly dried, then came down even harder out of fear alone. It had been absolutely quiet outside the cave, but the second she was dragged over the threshold she was met with the screams of her friends. Her heart beating erratically she sobbed out to her captors," Wh-what are they doing to Jenna and K-Kenzie? They sound like they're in pain!"

"Good, that's what they should be sounding like. The blonde idiot spoke the truth, he and the rest of us are done holding back out of pity for your lack of abilities. Right about now your friends are being reminded of the same thing." Kakuzu's voice was cold with the slightest undertone of content. Kakuzu's could not be seen, but the smile on Hidan's face spoke volumes. They were relishing in the screams that continued to echo throughout the cave walls.

The closer she was dragged towards the kitchen the more dominate Kenzie's screams became. Bracing herself for the worst Takisha did not want to see her friend being chopped up for a meal. Entering the kitchen Takisha was both relieved and sorry to see that Kenzie was getting treatment that matched Jenna's past hell.

Kenzie was face down on the kitchen table with Kisame holding her absolutely still as Itachi used an ink covered kunai to tattoo some writing on the soles of her feet. Kenzie's feet were one of the most sensitive parts of her body, so Takisha could understand the pain she must have been feeling.

Kisame took notice of the new arrivals and their appearances. Takisha was ignored of course for Hidan was much more interesting," Hey Hidan, what happened? She actually get the better of you and send you into the pond?" This was asked upon the fact that Hidan being wet and his hand clearly attached by Kakuzu's tentacles. Itachi halted his mutilating hand in order to cast a glance in their direction, Kenzie's relief lasted only a second before he continued.

Kakuzu answered for the very peeved Hidan who would likely end up killing Takisha if he had to think about the incident again. "It just goes to show that our methods and treatments are paying off. Hey, you don't need the table to finish supper do you?"

"No, because TACOS, which I was making before this whole hunting nonsense started doesn't require a lot of room!" Takisha had indeed been making tacos for supper before the hunt had began and luckily the meat and shells hadn't gotten burnt while they'd been terrorized.

Kakuzu let out a noise resembling a snort and a scoff then threw the rather hefty bad of fresh meat onto the counter next to the stove. Pointing to it Kakuzu ordered," It won't take long to cook enough of that that you can substitute the beef for the the first round. After that you can make the others however we want." Takisha was released from her metal pinching confinements and shoved towards the stove.

Trying hard not to cry again she took her punishment and began cooking Shreds' remains. When the smell hit Itachi's nose he sent a glance to Kisame to see if he noticed what exactly was being used in place of beef. The smoke must have been thicker than the smell for Kisame didn't even blink in Takisha's direction while shoving some kind of dish cloth into Kenzie's mouth.

In the midst of sniffles and sobs Takisha asked in a watery voice," Wh-what's happening to Jenna? She was screaming a minute ago."

"Hm, if I recall correctly Sasori wanted to put a few holes in her or something like that. I have no idea what Deidara was planning." Kisame replied thoughtfully while keeping his hand over Kenzie's mouth to keep her from spiting out the dishrag so she could curse at Kisame for assisting Itachi in his cruel torture.

"Holes? What do you mean by holes? It doesn't sound like something she could live through!" Takisha turned full around to yell this at Itachi in particular who she would have thought would be more protective of his property.

Hidan had remained behind to make sure Takisha went through with her punishment, hearing her ridiculous concern he let out a small, 'pfft.' Having her attention he explained," When he says holes he means piercings, Konan commented that Freckles might look more intimidating with some metal on her ears. If it makes any difference I protested and said scars and ink are more effective." There came a sharp muffled yelp from Kenzie at these words, apparently Itachi didn't agree and showed it through adding the next stroke a little too hard.

"But even ear piercing isn't painful enough to warrant that much screaming. Sure Jenna is a big sensitive whimp that but even she can bite back ear piercing." Takisha stated her thoughts loud enough for all to hear and understand that whatever was happening was thanks to Deidara.

"Finished." Itachi's single word drew all their attention back to what had been happening on the table. Kisame removed his weight from Kenzie and helped her sit up. Hidan and Takisha left the stove and went round to see what Kenzie's feet were branded with.

Much to Takisha's frustration the tattoo was written in Japanese, and not even dimension transferal could teach them to read new languages. Hidan burst into a bout of chuckles and gave Itachi a firm pat on the back," Nice job, I like it a lot more than what you did to Spots!"

Kenzie tenderly lifted each foot and looked them over, she'd been trying to teach herself Japanese even before the whole Naruto characters intrusion. Seeing nothing familiar she glared at Kisame who was also smiling ear to ear in approval, her voice hoarse from her squeaking she roughly demanded," What does it say? Tell me right now!"

Hidan slapped Kenzie's back where the still present Jashin symbol was and answered her more than happily," It says 'Akatsuki's Housewife.' In other words you rightfully belong to ALL of us. Hey Uchiha, you should do the same to the head chef." At this provided idea Takisha gave Hidan's reattached wrist a good slap with the metal spatula. The resounding hiss and growl of pain put Takisha at ease to go back to the stove to move the meat around.

Itachi thought about giving Takisha a tattoo as well but another prolonged yelp from Sasori's room drew more of his attention. Saying nothing he made his quiet way to the puppet master's room. Opening the door he was curious to find Jenna standing on one foot on a top of small stool, Sasori stood next to her with a needle and box of colourful push pins. **(K: Courtesy of 'Staples.')**

Already Jenna had two push pins in her left ear and it seemed that Sasori was about to put two in her right ear. The piercings did not explain why the floor was covered with thumb tacks or the small smudges of blood all over Jenna's arms and legs or Deidara standing on the other side of her wiggling his fingers in preparation for a tickle assault. Leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed Itachi observed what he thought was going to happen.

Sasori grabbed hold of Jenna's right ear and pulled the lobe down tight, knowing what was coming next Jenna let out a tiny whimper in preparation. With a swift little thrust Sasori had one of the push pins through her ear lobe, when Sasori let go of her ear Deidara moved in for the attack. To accompany Deidara's tickling fingers (which Jenna was able to tolerate to a certain degree) he also began to whisper something in her other ear that effectively made Jenna go bright red and sputter," H-he would NOT! (insert more Deidara whispering) WHAT? Give e proof or evidence that that would ever happen! (insert more whispering)...Okay, that I believe, crap! Ow! Ow! Owww! Godammit!This is cruel AND unusual torture! What's wrong with you assassins that you couldn't just pry off a fingernail?"

"Ugh, that's interrogation torture, un. This is just play torture, un. Besides, I'm sure Itachi will appreciate your new piercings." Deidara stuck out his three tongues at the thought of removing fingernails, he and the other Akatsuki members didn't endure manicures and pedicures just to get the polished things ripped off. With that in mind they'd silently agreed that they would never rip another person's nail off...unless they were disgusting and/or ordered to do so.

Taking his being mentioned as a cue Itachi stepped forward to comment,"Whoever gave you that idea was mistaken. I prefer my property undamaged, and what you are doing is damaging."

Jenna almost, ALMOST, let out a sigh of relief upon seeing Itachi. It was an almost because she remembered the last time she was in a situation of torture and he'd showed up. Instead of helping her the bastard had helped out the instigator, which was Kakuzu. Glaring from her pain and the claim to belonging to him Jenna commented," In that case I might just roll all over those push pins, and I'll get Sasori to pierce my nose and tongue too!"

"I have no problem with that."Sasori had just pushed the last pin into Jenna's ear and was reaching for more to her nose and tongue as she'd suggested.

"No thanks! Was just naming examples, what you've done already is enough. Buh bye!" Slapping a hand over her nose and mouth Jenna jumped up from her laying position on the floor, tip toed around the other evil little tacks that were coated in her blood and hastily left the room.

The three men stood in silence for a moment after their victim has left, the silence was broken by Itachi turning on Deidara to ask," What were you whispering in her ear before she fell?"

Deidara went rigid in posture and broke out into a sweat, moving to retreat from the room he replied casually,"Nothing really, un. I just thought she should know you planned on raping her tonight while she was tied to the bed in the usual kitty maid outfit. GACK!" Deidara had almost made it out the door, but an exploding water clone caught him at the thresh hold. Needless to say Deidara was blasted about ten feet down the hallway.

Sasori observed all this quietly and asked after the demented blonde was removed from his room," Did you blast him because he spoke the truth or because he spoke in general?"

"Because he exists. I would ask that you further refrain from ruining my property but I understand that it is quite difficult not to." Sasori gave a single nod to agree with both things that Itachi said and proceeded to clean up the tacks and pins scattered on the floor.

**-In the Kitchen-**

Staggering into the kitchen Jenna plopped into the nearest seat and slammed her head onto the table. After a second passed she tilted her head to the side and muttered," Takisha, why are you making fish? I thought we were having tacos."

"You're eating fish tacos for the first round. If you're too much of a baby you can have a regular taco after you eat the first one." Jenna turned her head to the left to find she'd taken the seat right next to Kakuzu. To show she didn't care about being babyish she stuck out her tongue then turned her head to the other side where Kenzie sat with her feet propped up on the table.

Noticing that her eyes were red and puffy Jenna asked," What did you go through in my absence?"

Kenzie rolled her head to glare at her friend then swung her whole body in order to plant her feet onto Jenna's lap. Seeing the familiar damage Jenna sat up properly and opened her arms. The glare gone Kenzie gladly fell into Jenna's arms for the much needed hug. "Jashin, since when did your frick'n life become a damn chick flick?" Hidan grumbled this from the other side of Kenzie.

"The moment you jerk faces invaded our school, that's when!" Takisha answered at the same time she dropped a plate loaded with hard and soft shell tacos onto the table.

"I was expecting you to mention when we abducted you, un. That seemed to be your favourite thing to gripe about for the longest time, un." Deidara grumbled this while rubbing his sore back, Itachi's attack had sent him right into a wall.

Pushing away from Jenna Kenzie got right into his face," We bitch about it because we don't know why it happened. As far as know we've been going through all this hell for your amusement alone! So until we're told why we've been brought here we will continue to bitch about it." Her big bitch speech given, along with a few chest pokes, Kenzie went back to Jenna and hugged her again.

Hidan and Kakuzu exchanged a look before Kakuzu asked Takisha," You seriously haven't been told why you were brought here?" When the girls shook their heads Kakuzu, Hidan, Deidara, and Kisame erupted into laughter.

Slapping the table Kisame spluttered," You've been living with us...for almost two months...and you still don;t know? You...are the most unperceptive bunch of girls...I've ever met!"

Angry veins popping out of their heads the girls just let them laugh, they'd just gained some information and they were going to milk it for all it's worth. After a few more seconds the rest of the Akatsuki members filed into the kitchen for lunch, much to some of their confusion/amusement when Itachi sat down next to Jenna she moved her chair a few inches away from him. Deidara snickered and received a death glare from Jenna.

Takisha watched with a big frown as everyone consumed the tacos, it was sickening for her to see Kisame eat five in quick procession. Hidan and Kakuzu sat either side of Kisame, which was right across from Takisha. Smirking lopsidedly Hidan asked Kisame," You gonna eat any of the beef ones?"

Swallowing the remainder of his last taco Kisame grinned," What nonsense are you talking about? These are much better than beef tacos. I'm going to eat as many of these as my stomach can hold. You need to make these more often Takisha." Kisame was the only one who didn't understand why Takisha burst into tears and ran from the kitchen.

Jenna glared at Hidan and Kakuzu, collecting her beef tacos and went after Takisha. Itachi finished eating his fish taco then addressed Kisame," The fish tacos are made from the remainders of Shreds, as I understand it you have Hidan to thank."

The reaction was instant, Kisame went pale blue then ran for the trash can to expel the contents in his stomach. Kenzie pt down the taco she was about to start eating, grabbed her plate then threw it at Hidan's head. The immortal jack ass had been laughing at Kisame so he received the flying plate's attack full on the forehead. Hidan stood to give a retaliating blow, only to be tackled by Kisame who had recovered from his emotional shock. Sighing loudly Kakuzu stood up from the table with his food and left to go to his bedroom. Sasori waited for the first punch to connect (Kisame broke Hidan's nose) before leaving the table as well.

Kenzie would have left as well but in the midst of the struggle Kisame's cloak was removed, leaving both men shirtless. Unable to tear her eyes away she didn't see Deidara and Zetsu make bets on who would win. Itachi didn't bother sticking around after giving them a glance to quietly acknowledge that Kisame would of course win against the feeble human, immortal or not.

The scene of abandoned tacos, Hidan and Kisame fighting to the death with their fists. Deidara and Zetsu cheering one of them on and a bag of shark remnants still on the kitchen counter was what Konan and Pein came home to. They were not impressed.


	20. Mission Test Run

**J: Wooooow, I seriously didn't think this chapter was that long when I was writing it, did I ever miscalculate! And I even told you guys it was going to be short too, HA!**

**K: "Humming and bouncing around with little flowers dancing around her head."**

**T: Jenna, don't forget!**

**J: Yes Yes! Yesterday was Kenzie's birthday people! She is now 18! You hear that Kisame (wherever you are) SHE IS EIGHTEEN!**

**K: "Flowers burn up and fall to the ground" D: DON'T IMPLY THINGS!**

**J: There's a big present for you over there from me and Takisha. "Points to massive box with big blue bow on it."**

**K: I have a sinking feeling, but I must open it! "Runs over to the box to try and figure out how to open it."**

**T: At the end of the chapter you shall find out what we gave Kenzie. "Very big evil grin."**

**J: TIME TO GIVE THANKS!**

**THANKS TO: **PrincessAnna-UchihaLover**(Yes, yes it does suck SO much. In order to write all this I put myself in their minds, and this is the end result as well as a few headaches. Kenzie also thanks you for being the only one to sympathize with her.)**LightWolfHeart **(I think you nagged me like twice before I got this up, you're really slacking:P xD J/K) **Little Syringe **(I know! I start SO many fanfics on paper, but I can never really do good on the computer, so I end up using so many notebooks and I feel terrible when I don't finish the fanfic!) **Neko Hoshi** (this chapter will comment on the luck you wished for me xD And I believe everyone enjoys some good shirtless fun once in a while lol.)** Kakashi-Forever **(No, he doesn't so I believe that's how he is. I mean I can imagine it's the kinda impatient people that have the ability to be all zippy.)**

**J: Now we must make a happy disclaimer couple! Upon request we have Kushina Uzumaki!**

**Ku: Hello! "Waves with a nice smile on her face."**

**T: Thanks for your help earlier by the way!**

**Ku: No problem, I needed a little action, it sucks being non-existent in the manga "Pouty glare at Kishimoto."**

**J: You gonna stick around to see what happens when she finally gets the box open?**

**Ku: Sure! "Big toothy grin." Jenna does not own any of the Naruto characters named in this fanfiction, and Takisha and Kenzie own themselves! ENJOY!**

**J: MORE NAMES REQUESTS PEOPLE! AND ANY READERS, WHO I KNOW THERE ARE ALOT OF, PLEAAASEE REVIEEEW! I WANNA BREAK MY RECORD!  
**

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Chapter Eighteen – Mission Test Run**

**(J:LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN! "Dancing and singing this." K: "Slaps Jenna on the back of the head." Knock it off, I have a headache. T: And your singing isn't all that great either. J: If I wanted abusive friends I'd hang out with the guys more...willingly.)**

** -Two Weeks Later-**

"Are you sure they're ready? It's only been three months since they've been training."

"That's more than enough time, especially with Itachi and Sasori's training. According to the last reports they've doubled in progress. Besides, the missions won't be too life threatening."

"But you're sending two of them out of the country. And I know Kenzie is perceptive enough to figure out where the cave is located."

"I can't see that being a problem when they can't communicate with anyone outside of the Akatsuki. They are going on these missions, end of story. Now summon everyone to the living room." His order given Konan could not argue and left the room. Collecting the three scrolls containing the mission details Pein thought to himself, 'They better be ready for their first missions, they're not getting a second chance.'

The sun was just beginning to rise and everyone (except Zetsu) was still asleep. The evening before had been a team training evening, which had ended with the girls going to bed earlier than normal with bruises and band aides all over their bodies.

For the past two weeks everyone was curios as to what went on in Itachi's room that Jenna often came to the table looking completely irritated. Konan, though opposed to them being put on missions, felt this gave her a perfect excuse to teleport into Itachi's room (since he does up the ten locks immediately when entering the room.) Materializing into the room Konan's picture perfect moment senses kicked in. Jenna was laying on her side facing away from Itachi but that didn't dissuade him from taking advantage. _'If I remember correctly he is spooning her...It DOES sound wrong. I'll just say he's snuggling her from behind. I can't see this making her so grumpy every morning.' _"Good morning!"

"GAK!" 'thump!' The second Jenna woke up she became aware of her situation and quickly pushed herself away and onto the floor. _'That makes more sense.' _Itachi sat up and glared at her for ruining her comfort.

Konan waved away the aura of negativity he was sending at her and explained," Pein wants everyone to assemble in the living room ASAP." Itachi was still unhappy (he didn't physically show it) but gave a nod that he would obey.

Even when Konan poofed out of the room she heard Jenna from the other side of the door," You took my bra off AGAIN? What's wrong with you?"

_'Nothing, he's just an emotionally constipated pig like most men.' _Konan grumbled this in her thoughts upon remembering the state that she would often wake up in thanks to Pein's wandering hands **(T,K: TMI! TMI!) **Next was Takisha and Kenzie.

Opening the door to Takisha's room (the lock got busted during the previous weeks) she wasn't surprised to find her in the lotus position meditating to focus her chakra projection. The form was visible only because of the leaves and flower petals that Takisha kept for this reason. The astral form caught on to her chakra and vanished back into Takisha's body. Opening her eyes Takisha smiled up at Konan," Good morning. Something you need or have you come to make a breakfast request that does not involve meat?" Ever since the shark meat incident Takisha avoided cooking meat if at all possible.

"Nope, just wanted to let you know that you're expected in the living room ASAP." Konan enjoyed Takisha's enthusiasm first thing in the morning, or to be more precise, before she started interacting with the men. If Takisha didn't get harassed in the morning she would be the perfect mother image. Kind and composed, ready to face the day. As soon as the men come into the picture she turns into the older sister left by the parents to tend to all her younger siblings.

Takisha gave a nod and stood from her lotus position, only to topple onto her bed while moaning," My legs are asleeep. I'll be out there in a minute give or take a little." Konan let out a small giggle then left.

Opening the door to Kenzie's room it bothered her to see crumpled up pieces of paper littering the floor, as well as very small well used pencils. If she looked closely enough she could make out ink blotches on the floor. Stepping around and over the piles she got to the bed to find Kenzie barely visible through her cocoon made of blankets. **(J: Over the weeks Kenzie made Kisame use some of her allowance to go buy a blanket that could cover her body. Over time it became a mountain that the guys wanted to destroy as a means of anger release.)**

Letting out a sigh Konan approached the end of the bed where Kenzie's head was suppose to be. Giving it a shake she said loudly but gently," Kenzie get up, you need to get ready and go to the living room."

A small amount of movement occurred followed by Kenzie's sleepy voice," Nooooo. Sleeep."

"Mackenzie it is no an option, now get out of bed."Losing some of her gentleness Konan gave the cocoon a good shove so that it was pushed closer to the edge. Kenzie whined some more but did not budge.

Blowing air out of her nose in a show of irritation Konan completely lost her patience," Fine, but don't say I didn't give you a chance young lady." With a good strong shove with her foot the cocoon was pushed off the bed entirely.

Kenzie's whine of protest fell on deaf ears as Konan went around the bed and pulled the blanket off Kenzie's crumpled form on the floor. Crossing her arms Konan scolded," Come on Mackenzie, put that lazy rear into gear. If you're not out in the living room in three minutes there will be hell to pay. And it won't be me dealing it to you."

When the door slammed shut Kenzie poked her head out from the cocoon and mumbled darkly," They can wait four minutes after that unnecessary kick."

**-Four Minutes Later-**

Kenzie proudly walked into the living room to meet Konan and Pein's unimpressed glares. As she walked past Konan Kenzie heard her whisper," The consequences will bite you in the ass later." The ominous undertone to Konan's words put a small chill down Kenzie's spine but ignored it to go sit on the couch next to a once again frumpy Jenna.

All the cave dwellers present Leader got right down to business," Starting today everyone will be going on missions, that includes the girls. Each assignment has been chosen to match your skill levels with the girl's taken into account. Your mission details are in the scrolls already handed out. I expect you all to be out of the cave by noon. You are dismissed, except the girls, I need to have a private word with you." The news about the missions was already a hefty smack to the face, (even though Leader had given them a warning from the beginning that they would be put on missions.) If they were given even more to deal with they would probably fall to the floor and twitch to death.

The guys left immediately to go pack for their first mission in weeks. Deeming the room to be clear Leader approached them to put more oomph into his already dark evil leader appearance. Being towered over by Leader made the girls feel like they were back at school and they needed to escape from the school bus on Halloween. **(J: I will give a special opening to the one who can tell me why they needed to get off the bus that day.) **His voice dead serious Leader told them," Since this is your first mission I will give you one, and only one strike. If during your mission you at any time feel that your life is in danger then stay completely out of the others' way. They will deal with any problems. After this mission any future missions you go on you are to do exactly as told, if I get back a report that you were as disobedient out there as you are here, then I will resort to more extreme methods. Am I understood?" Their large frightened gazes went well with the shaky head nods they gave in reply.

Turning his gaze specifically onto Jenna he instructed," You are to come to my room before departing, it will be your death otherwise." Jenna gave three quick nods. Content that they would be well behaved Leader left to his chambers.

A hand over her heart Takisha sighed in relief," That guy really knows how to give someone the shakes. And just think Jenna, you get to be deal with him all by yourself."

"Ugh, I think I'm going to be sick just thinking about it." Jenna's skin tone matched her words for it had gone a few degrees in the green area of her skin pallet.

"So...Where are you guys getting shipped off to ?" Kenzie, having been denied a scroll due to tardiness, was curious as to who was going where.

Jenna unrolled her scroll and moaned," I'm only being sent to the town to collect information. I am not doing it the same way as Jiraya!"

"You wouldn't be able to even if you tried, and according to my scroll I will be going to a no name town in the wind country. What are the chances of me running into Kankuro or Temari?" Takisha directed the question towards Kenzie what with her more logically organized brain. Kenzie only shrugged, she really couldn't say anything on the matter since missions were sporadically given.

Jenna's eyes suddenly obtained a light of intelligence. Leaping off the couch she went to the desk mostly forgotten i the living room and grabbed a paper and pen. Never knowing when one of the men wouldpop in she wrote quickly but still clearly. The message written Jenna rolled it up tight and took off the random ribbon she'd kept tied around her wrist. With much reluctance Jenna took off her necklace and removed the heart pendant to put it on the ribbon. Going back to Takisha she asked in a hushed whisper," Do you think you can slip this to someone in a bottle while you're in town?"

"Maybe, but what did you write? I don't want to get killed for a last love letter." Takisha gave Jenna suspicious eyes towards the heart attachment.

Rolling her eyes Jenna held up both hands to show uncrossed fingers when she told her," It's not a love letter, it's a status update. To sum it up it say (censored, censored,censored.) Good enough?"

"I suppose. Next time one of us gets to write the letter though, if I can even get this one out. Maybe we should write 'To Kazekage' on the outside of it as well. Just in case I can't verbally tell the person I give it to." Kenzie and Jenna nodded to this thought and kept watch for her as she did just that.

The note safely tucked away into an inner vest compartment the girls applauded themselves for this attempt at contact. Just because they had adjusted to life with the Akatsuki didn't mean they wanted to stay with them for the rest of their probably short lives.

A bellow from Hidan sent Takisha in gear to go pack up for the long trip ahead. Slumping forward a bit Kenzie grumbled," Guess I'll go ask Kisame where we'll be going, watch I won't get an answer even from him." Despite knowing about the possibility of denial she still went off to ask Kisame a million times.

'According to the specifics I'm to stay in town all day, so I better get some money and writing gear together.' Jenna thought this while going to her own room.

**-In Takisha's Room-**

"We're going to the fucking desert so bring two water skins and as much sun screen as you're willing to carry. You're paying for your own food as well. If you're not at the entrance in five minutes I'm dragging your ass through the sand." Hidan preached all this while pacing back and forth in Takisha's room while she tried to pack.

When he didn't leave after making the threat Takisha spun around and asked him with her arms crossed," You're nervous about me going on the mission aren't you?"

"As if bitch. I'm just making sure you don't screw us over, now quit talking and keep packing." His blatant whiny denial given Hidan stomped out of the room leaving Takisha to wonder if she could rely on Hidan and Kakuzu to keep her alive if a fight came up.

**-In Kisame's Room-**

"Tell me."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because you don't deserve to know."

"And who decided that?"

"...I did."

"Pfft liar. You're just not telling me because Itachi told you not to tell me, right?"

"I do not follow Itachi's orders."

"Aww, someone is embarrassed to be Itachi's bitch." Kenzie made sure to poke Kisame in the back when cooing this.

His cheeks turning purple from rage Kisame spun on Kenzie and pinned her to the wall with both arms on either side of her head. Getting very close to the point of nose touching Kisame leered and growled," You listen here missy. I am nobody's bitch, especially not a girly man such as Itachi's. I respect him for his abilities and listen to what he recommends. That is all, but if you insist on there being some kind of bitch relationship then we can gladly accommodate with you being our sole bitch."

Before that moment Kenzie had really not seen Kisame as a threatening person. With a threat like that and in a position like that, Kenzie not only saw Kisame as a threatening person, she also got a refresher in hormones and attraction for him. Her face very, very red Kenzie stuttered out," I-I will drop the topic...If you tell me my mission details so I can pack accordingly."

Kisame let out a rather feral sounding growl and removed his arms so Kenzie could step back a few meters. Going to his bed he grabbed the scroll that was suppose to be given to her and accurately threw it at her head. Rubbing the impact spot on her forehead Kenzie mumbled a cross thanks and left to her room to pack.

**-In Jenna's Room-**

"Money, pens, paper, kunais, smoke bombs, fake I.D. Good, I have everything." Her small pouches packed and strapped to both hips Jenna felt she was ready and set to go.

"We are requested to see Leader before you depart." Jenna turned to find Itachi leaning against her door frame.

Cocking an eyebrow and walking to the door she questioned," We? I was only told me? Why are you needed?"

Itachi didn't reply and walked off to Leader's room with a very confused but still relieved Jenna following after.

As they got closer to Leader's door Jenna's anxiety grew to the point where she started taking smaller and smaller footsteps until she was shuffling after Itachi. When Itachi got to the door he glanced over his shoulder to see that Jenna was still two feet away. Having no patience Itachi went back and grabbed her arm to drag her to the opened door.

Past the threshold the door slammed shut behind them putting the room in very dim light. Squinting to see anything Jenna was startled when Itachi took hold of her from behind so her arms were restrained. She let out a small yelp when Leader's eyes appeared in front of her. "Hold still, if I miss your carotid artery you will die."

Jenna went perfectly still but not without asking," Could you please tell me what the hell is going on?" They didn't reply, and to make her feel even more insecure with the situation Itachi put a a hand over her mouth.

Leader's middle and index fingers lit up with chakra, using his trained accuracy he placed his fingers directly on the Jenna's main artery in her neck. His other hand made a single sign as he uttered a quiet, "Constriction seal release." The sudden sensation of something really really hot leaving her throat made Jenna squeak.

The flaming sensation abruptly broke off from her neck, in Leader's hand floated a light green band of light that appeared to have little bells hanging off it. Itachi released Jenna allowing her legs to give out and crumple to the floor. Leader held the band up to his eyes for closer inspection and voiced his thoughts," Interesting, the chakra I placed has conformed to your own in order to stay in place."

"You...you took the choker off?Oh! I would have died since Itachi won't be near me on my mission...Thank you.?" Having figured out the purpose of the meeting Jenna wasn't sure if she should be entirely grateful, it just seemed like something was missing.

"You are mistaken if you believe I will allow you to leave without putting in a safety trap."

Without warning Itachi's hands closed around Jenna's throat, she heard him mutter some words, she felt his hands grow hot then she felt something burn into her skin. She opened her mouth to scream but no sound came out. Itachi's hands cooled slowly until they were normal temperature. His hands left her throat and helped her to stand. Leader answered the question she obviously would have asked," Your voice has been sealed to ensure you do not attempt escape. Once you return tonight I shall unseal your voice. You are dismissed."

In an utter daze after so many events Jenna allowed Itachi to lead her out of the room.

**-By The Entrance-**

"She has two more seconds before I go tie her up and drag her the whole fucking way." Hidan grumbled this from impatience. Kakuzu didn't care too much, it was a simple scroll retrieval mission that could be accomplished in a night, however the actual journey would take more than two days to walk. On the way back they would travel during the night as well in order to keep distance between them and any possible followers.

Takisha came dashing around the corner right on the last second, coming to an abrupt halt she wheezed out," Sorry! I was just trying to say bye to Kenzie and Jenna before I left."

"You wouldn't have gotten a fare well from Jenna even if you did find her." Kakuzu told Takisha this while evaluating her choice of clothing and the contents of her knapsack (which was taken from her as soon as she got close enough.)

Tilting her head to the side Takisha asked all but innocently," And why wouldn't she? We're not in a fight or anything like that."

"Simple: Leader doesn't trust any of you fucking blather mouths to be off the property by yourselves. So he took her voice away to ensure silence and that she returns." Takisha could tell that Hidan found the whole thing to be quite funny.

Putting some hair into her mouth to chew Takisha thought,' Knowing Jenna this might not bother her...As long as nothing happens to her while she doesn't have her voice to complain.'

"Get moving or I swear to Jashin I will not only drag you, I will drag you naked!" Hidan's bellow drew her back to the real world and realization that Kakuzu had given back her knapsack and they were already walking away from her.

Running to catch up she yelled," You should have told me we were leaving!"

"A shinobi doesn't need to be told! If you paid attention then you would have followed after us right away!" Hidan yelled this back even though Takisha was only a foot behind them.

Kakuzu inwardly groaned, ' I believe I need to have a word with Leader about this grouping.' To make this thought absolute Takisha snapped back," Well if certain people didn't kidnap me then I wouldn't have to be a shinobi now would I?" Thus began Takisha's first mission.

**-In Kenzie's Room-**

"Damn you sketchbook FIT!" Kisame walked into Kenzie's room to find she was trying to shove her sketchbook into the already full knapsack.

Getting up behind her and putting his mouth right next to her ear he whispered," It won't fit."

"NYAAAH! MY EAR HAS BEEN VIOLATED!" Clapping a hand to her ear Kenzie jumped away from Kisame with a vibrant pink blush on her face.

"Hm, we were sure you were the least perverted one out of the three. Oh well." Kisame mumbled this to himself after taking a moment to figure out what Kenzie was getting so riled up about.

Collecting her scattered thoughts Kenzie got closer to Kisame so he would see only her. A stern expression on her face she more or less demanded," Help me out with my bag please Pervy Shark Man. I've repacked this thing three times already and I can never get my sketchbook in."

"Pervy Shark Man? I thought Konan taught you three what and how to pack last week? She even said you passed with flying colours." Kisame brushed off the nickname to ask about the bag situation.

Avoiding eye contact completely Kenzie muttered just loud enough for Kisame to hear," Well I didn't want to miss lunch, and it's not my fault that Konan can't tell the difference between my packing skills and Takisha's."

Rolling his eyes Kisame decided he'd let it slide this time but kept in mind to let Konan know she'd been cheated. Dumping out the contents of the bag Kisame pointed to the cause of the problem," If you leave this behind you should be able to get your sketchbook in there no problem."

"But, it's really nice to have. I even managed to roll it up so it could fit in the bag." Kenzie grabbed her rolled and tied up pillow and hugged it to her chest. Kisame both sweat dropped and inwardly felt a tinge of jealously towards the pillow.

An idea on how to resolve the problem came from the dark corridor of his mind, the smallest of blushes tinted Kisame's ears under his headband. Clearing his throat first Kisame crossed his arms and stated firmly," You won't need the pillow, I'll provide a pillow for you."

"You mean you're going to bring your pillow and let me use it?" Kenzie thought about this solution, and took into account that Kisame's travel pack was actually quite big, so carrying a pillow for him would be no problem.

"...Yes." Kisame decided this would also bring about some amusement, especially when Kenzie learned what the 'pillow' actually was.

"Okay, I will accept this. Now leave so I can pack more personal items!" Kenzie unrolled her pillow and began repacking.

Kisame shrugged and got to the door, before leaving he put in over his shoulder," Oh, and don't bother saying good bye to Jenna, she won't be able to say anything back." Kenzie blinked in confusion but didn't bother pressing the topic, she would just ask once they were on the road.

**-Back to Jenna-**

She couldn't talk, she couldn't scream, she couldn't sing. The singing part really ticked her off, especially since she liked to sing when she went on walks on her own. Jenna was so deep in her irritated thoughts that she didn't realize that Itachi was still leading her down the hallway and to his room.

It wasn't until she heard the door close that she snapped out of it. Knowing that Itachi was trained in lip reading Jenna mouthed the words," Why am I in your room again? Don't you have a mission to go on?"

Stepping closer to her Itachi answered," I'm going to make sure no one takes a more than friendly interest in you."

When someone says something like that the only thing you can really only think of is face demolition. Jumping another two meters away Jenna soundlessly yelled," That isn't necessary seeing as I'm more than capable of taking care of myself!"

Going into deja vu Jenna went far enough back to the point where she was crawling backwards on his bed. Itachi couldn't waste too much time playing cat and mouse since he needed to get going on his mission, so using his ninja speed he pinned her down on the bed. **(T: Oooh, I see where this is going...Someone wanted a little Itachi action. J: LALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!) **Sasori hadn't lied when he said he'd told Itachi about the reverse rag doll effect for he made sure to straddle her waist in the process.

Completely immobilized Jenna was not expecting what Itachi meant by making her less desirable. Without warning Itachi clamped his mouth down on Jenna's neck. _'He...He's giving me a HICKEY? Oh my fucking God! This can't be happening, he is not- Gah! Tongue! That was definitely his tongue on my neck! Ow! Bastard just bit me! It's official I will never be able to face Gaara without feeling like I cheated on him!'_

Certain he'd done efficiently Itachi unleeched himself from Jenna's neck and looked over the mark. If he knew how to do anything well, it was giving others bruises. This type was no exception, it was huge, dark, puffy and completely impossible not to see. Getting off his frozen victim he left the room without saying anything.

Jenna lay on the bed for five seconds longer before coming to her senses. Sitting up she touched the damaged part of her neck only to wince on contact. The bastard had not held back ensuring that the mark would last at least a week if not two.

Unable to do anything about it she decided she would go get a scarf from Konan before heading out.

To her misfortune Deidara caught sight of it before she got the scarf and had to endure his offerings of giving her a less brutish mark. It ended when Konan broke his nose with the heel of her shoe.

* * *

**J,T, Ku: "Patiently watching as Kenzie finally discovers the catch that will open the whole box."**

**K: "Pulls on the ribbon" Why couldn't you guys made it more- 0.0...0/0..."Absolutely speechless."**

**J,T, Ku: "Dying on the floor laughing at Kenzie's reaction to seeing giant sculpture of shirtless Kisame made of pocky."**

**K:...Does Kisame know about this?**

**T: N-no, but all the other guys do xD**

**K: D8 WHY?**

**J: Cause we needed a reference, so it was either one of them or Gai. Who would you rather see shirtless for three hours for a WEEK?**

**K: Ok, that is acceptable. But I'm not thanking you and I'm not killing you...Now what the hell do I do with it?**

**Ku: Can I take a bite? I haven't eaten anything in a long time.**

**K: Uh...Depends on where you intend to bite it.**

**J,T: "Dying of laughter again."**

**Ku: "Ruffles Kenzie's hair affectionately then goes and bites of Kisame's left elbow and leaves."**

**J,K,T:...Lol heart.  
**


End file.
